Daughter and Grandson Sick Please Advise

Updated on December 21, 2008
K.C. asks from Manning, SC
16 answers

My daughter 35 has been run down for a while. At 35 she homeschools three children under 8 and has an 18 month old. recently found out she has Mono and the baby was just diagnosed with RSV yesterday. So who has any experience with either of these illnesses? Any advice? She is watching baby Jonathan for any wheezing problems but so far it is a bad cold. Herself-just tired and sore glands around the neck. Note that she thinks she caught the mono by sharing food and drinks with her dad who has had several reoccurences of the mono since she was 8 months pregnant with Jonathan. She was very tired all through the last 2 years with migraines recurring often and regular headaches.
They really need your prayers and advice! Blessings K.

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So What Happened?

You are all so wonderful! Many blessings are received just for asking and we so appreciate your kind caring advice. I know this will be a long haul for us all, but good news is Jonathan is doing well and Julia says she feels better today than she has in a while. Of course I am happy but know she needs help. She is going to hire a company to come in and deep clean the house. She does eat organics and takes alot of good vitamins, they even grind their own wheat for bread and pancakes...which are yummy! I know she is worn down with the four children;she does not homeschool outside children. And Xmas is on hold so they won;t be attending the family party since we have other small children and a 9month and 14 month old in the family. No one is taking any risk. We will be there for her this weekend and be able to help alot. I may be able to go stay with her once my vehicle is fixed, we have two but one has a blown engine! Again, I thank you all for being so active on this site and offering your super advice. I will keep you informed;we hope that the worst of her symptoms are over but sure glad to pass these messages on so she can reduce physical activity and watch the spleen issue. Blessings and Merry Christmas to all! K.

More Answers

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H.C.

answers from Atlanta on

My daughter, 14 months, was diagnosed last month with RSV. The doctors put her on an inhaler for a week and that seemed to have done the trick. She is back to being healthy and happy. She coughed alot during that week and immediately after taking the inhaler, but now it is rare that she coughs all night or all day.

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M.C.

answers from Charleston on

It is my understanding that, in an adult, mono can take up to a year to fully go away. A friend of mine recently had it at 34 years old and, after 6 months, she started to feel less tired, but did not feel like her normal self until about 10 months later. I'm sure that is not what you wanted to hear. I'd advise your daughter to take care of herself as much as she can. She has a full plate, but maybe she could cut back in some areas, like hiring a cleaning person, babysitters etc--she needs to rest and save her energy for those kiddos. As for RSV, I know it's fairly common and not too serious in an 18 month old. Kids are tough cookies--he'll be back to normal in no time. I'd just keep an eye out for worsening symptoms. I hope everyone starts feeling better soon!

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H.B.

answers from Atlanta on

K., I am so sorry to hear of that your family is sick. My son contracted RSV when he was four months old. He had a nebulizer and we had to use it every 6 hours around the clock for four weeks. (We still have to use it when he gets sick sometimes.) It was a pretty horrible time. He seemed much better after about two weeks, but their lungs can take it pretty hard. My doctors told us that my son would probably always have respiratory problems, and this has been true.

I think mostly your daughter needs a lot of support. It is exhausting to give those treatments every 6 hours, and it will require a lot of time away from work, or some time resting if she stays at home. If your daughter works, I would suggest her getting something in writing from the doctors, which I didn't do. As a result, I was forced to resign from my position on staff (at a church!)because the doctor also did not want my son going back to childcare for two more weeks after treatment, and I was told this was not an option from my place of work.

Nonetheless, they will get through it...my little baby got better, and your babies will too.

Prayers and well wishes,

H.

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P.S.

answers from Macon on

I used to come down with migraines. It would start with a neck muscle tightening, then it would expand into my head. I found out that if I keep my neck warm then the migraine won't develop. I wear turtlenecks during the fall, winter and spring. I haven't had a migraine in 5 years. I don't know if a neck muscle might be the cause of your daughter's migraines.
P. S

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E.M.

answers from Atlanta on

do not know what to say except you are on my prayers

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A.B.

answers from Spartanburg on

It sounds like your daughter has her hands full and I will keep her in my payers. As for the baby...my daughter had RSV at 2 weeks of age. We think she got while in the hospital when my older child came to visit us and had brochitis (which we did not know at the time). Anyway, she did have wheezing and the minute she was diagnosed at our Pediatrician's office, he put her on a nebulizer, which is a machine that vaporizes medicine and so that the child can inhale it. We had to buy one of these machines and had to give her a treatment every four hours. She did improve over about 3 weeks and we kept on giving her treatments twice a day for about 4 months. Unfortunatly, because she had it at such an early age, this has affected her throughout her life. She is now almost 3 and we are still giving her one treatment a day for prevention at night b/c in the winter she coughs so much and any time she gets a cold she wheezes. She will cough sometimes even after laughing too much. Her doctor says that for 80% of his patients the coughing and childhood asthmas goes away by the time they are 5. My friend's son had RSV at 6 months and never had any lasting effects, so maybe since your grandson is a little oder he won't have trouble either. Hope this helps!

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K.R.

answers from Savannah on

Goodness. I feel for your daughter tremendously!
My daughter just had RSV. I know for the age that the baby is at and my daughter is 20 m onths....they usually turn out fine. But it can take several weeks to get over. She has a nebulizer anyway but doesnt have to have treatments unless ashtma is playing up. I had to give her double the dosage of treatments 3 times a day. So yeah, make sure he isnt wheezing. It is very contagious too. I gave her ibuprofen around the clock and kept a cool mist humidifier in her room but make sure she washes it out every 3-4 days. In the end I gave her a decongestant to help dry her up. Her cough was so bad I had to sit up with her most night and rock her but I also finally gave her Robostusen (1/4 t.) at night although the dr. said it wouldnt help. It did.
I certainly hope her husband is helping her out. That is a rough one. Mono is serious and very tiring. I dont know much aobut it though. Both are highly contageous though. She needs rest and someone else to take care of the baby but I know that isnt always possible. I dont have family where I live so when Im sick its just another day.
Good luck. Im sorry I dont have more info.

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M.H.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi K.,

Mono and RSV are both indicative of a weak immune system. So are EVERY other symptom you described and they all go hand-in-hand. You can not "catch" mono if your body is truly working right. They are both viral in nature and can only go away if the body fights it off. There are no synthetic meds that are efficient with viruses.

Why did some people die during the plague and some people didn't even get sick? Why do nurses and doctors not get as sick as the sick patients they have? Immune systems have to be built AND protected. I'm in that sandwich generation as well K. so I know you are probably the one doing the bulk of the worrying. :) That can break down the immune system as well!

If you would like to call, or have your daughter call, I'll be glad to give you some further information so she can get past this faster and dodge things like this in the future. Email me back and let me know and we can coordinate. I would love to help!

God bless!

M.
www.squidoo.com/ifyourbabycouldtalk

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A.M.

answers from Atlanta on

The tiredness and migraines sound like a food allergy. The first thing to look into is whether she is eating any fake sugar? That gives me a migraine. More info on the fake sugars at www.mercola.com. They hide that stuff everywhere nowadays. If not that, try keeping a food journal to see if something triggers the migraines and headaches - wheat, dairy, etc.

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R.H.

answers from Atlanta on

Hi K.,

I'm so sorry they are going through all of this at once and I can feel your concern. I am a Respiratory Therapist and this is the time of year we see RSV (November through April). This is definitely going to be a rough time for them. I'm pleased that your grandson seems to have a mild case of it if it just seems like a bad cold. He's lucky he's a little older-- it can be more severe if they are under a year old and especially if they were born premature. I hate to say it but he might have been exposed to it from one of the kids that your daughter homeschools. It usually presents as a cold in older kids without anyone knowing any better and then younger siblings are exposed. I'm glad he's not wheezing-- if it starts just be sure she starts him on breathing treatments.

As for your daughter she needs to rest-- easy to say right--especially with a sick little one and a job??? I had mono when I was a teenager in high school. All I could do was sleep and get up and go to the bathroom. I missed a week of school and felt awful. Even after I started to feel better after a couple of weeks I tired very easily for about 2-3 months. I ran track in high school and went out for it the following spring (about 5 months later)and still did not have my complete energy back for that. The good thing is you don't usually get it again. She needs to rest and drink plenty of fluids and try to eat healthy. Her doctors will definitely be checking her spleen and liver to be sure she's okay there--nothing too physical (even if she had the energy) or her spleen might rupture.

I truly feel for her. It's rough being a mom when your sick and don't even think you can take care of yourself-- much less a child that is sick too. Hopefully she has some help with your grandson while she rests as much as she can. She needs to be careful to wash her hands alot when she coughs or sneezes and it's in her kisses as well. RSV is also very contagious so if she's still homeschooling the kids right now she should make sure she lets the families that also might have young infants at home to be on the safe side and make sure the older sibling that she teaches keeps some distance from the infants until your grandson is well (and everyone washes their hands fequently). They're in my prayers. R.

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H.R.

answers from Myrtle Beach on

My 4 month old had RSV about a month ago. Because its a virus you have to let it take its course. I'm not sure where she lives, but we are in the Myrtle Beach area and I know 2 really great Dr.'s that could help her and the baby.

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D.H.

answers from Atlanta on

I use natural remedies to take care of our children's and ourselves. I use a nebulizer with colloidal silver. She may want to do some probiotics as well. There are several other suggestions that I would give, but you may want to go to a local health food store and give them the info that you gave us so they can get you a few things. I hope they feel better soon!

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D.P.

answers from Atlanta on

Mono can wear a person out! -- and on top of that she has four children home all day three of whom need homeschooling?! I think, for now, she has more of a load than she can handle. I would suggest to her to get the three kids enrolled into a school -- or else if she knows any other homeschoolers or is in a coop, to ask someone else to take on three more kids for a while.

Poor thing! It's too bad you're 7 hours away... She's going to need help for a little while. Mono can leave a person feeling TIRED for months.

I think it's notable that she's had symptoms for as long as she has. I'm going to include some sites for you to look at.

check these out:

http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/infectiousmononucleosi...

http://www.cdc.gov/cfs/publications/cluster_1.htm

http://www.cdc.gov/cfs/pdf/06_103087_dtp_cfs_booklet-spre...

http://www.cdc.gov/cmv/clinicians.htm

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S.B.

answers from Atlanta on

I would encourage her to go see Dr. Albury Gardner in North Atlanta, easy to get to off 285. He has helped my friends and I so much with chronic fatigue, strep that won't go away with antibiotics, cancer and more. Rebuilding immune system takes time but really helps so much. Very good dr.! Chiropractor/natural supplements, less about moving your spine, more about supporting your system to clear internal problems.

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M.F.

answers from Athens on

K.

I feel for your situation! I had mono as a teenager and was literally out of service for at least a week. I then had the strenght to get out of bed and begin acting normal again. I remember having a very bad cold when it came on. AWFUL! In regards to your daughter...she needs a lot of rest. I hope it is possible for someone to come and sit with the children while she sleeps. I was told by my doctor that was key to a quick recovery. When your body rests, it is able to fight harder because all the energy can focus on the sickness. I was also told that it is one of those illnesses that once you get, you build antibodies up. This limits you from getting a full blown case of mono more than once. I wonder if there is something else wrong? Not to add to your worries but many times doctors treat the symptoms and not the patient. There are a thousand illnesses with the same symptoms. Just a thought. I hope it gets better soon!!!!!

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A.W.

answers from Sumter on

Dear K.,
I had adult mono, and let me tell you that it took me about 6 months to fully recover and I was in bed when ever I could be. At the time my toddler was being taken care of by my husband. If your daughter is married I hope her husband is able to take off work and help her. Mono can be very dangerous. It causes your spleen to swell and your suppose to remain inactive so it does not rupture. The RSV can be really hard to manage. My daughter and son both got it. My daughter had it when she was 2 months old and we were in the hospital for 4 days. My sons case was not so severe and she just got by on breathing treatments and it cleared up on its own. I really hope you can get her help or that she is excepting help. I pray for your family...hope everyone gets better.

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