Child Won't Talk to Grandparents! Help!

I am no psychology expert, but it just sounds like he is exerting some independence for himself. See what happens if you just let him NOT talk to them as he chooses for awhile. He may also be frustrated about the fact that they are not there in person. With a 3 yr old, my guess is, this will pass. I would not make too much of a big deal about it or he will find it real fun to exert so much power over adults by being rude and non-communicative.

Next time you call his grandparents, make sure the setting is right. He may be frustrated that they are not with him. I have found it helpful for my sons to hold a picture of the grandparent so he is talking "to them", to their image. Also, make sure that he is not distracted or in the middle of doing something else when you call.

I'll never forget my son running in the opposite direction of my husband whom we had not been with for three days. We, my son and I, were on vacation. When my husband was able to join us, our son did not understand why he was not with us the whole time, and was angry.
Hope this is heplful to you T..
R.

Tell them not to let it hurt their feelings. My son did the exact same thing to my mother! Just tell them it is a phase, my son was like that from about 3 until 4.5 yrs. My mom always told him when he was ready for a great big hug...just to come up and give her one and she'd give one back. She did try everytime. But she also tried the reverse pshyco... and that didn't work at all, but it might for them. Now he runs up to her! Good luck!...oh yeah, phone thing...same thing! He especially didn't like it on his b-day. everybody calling the house for him...he was done! He would get mad and say not again. He still doesn't like too many calls on his bday. Everyone understands...and boys just aren't phone kids like girls are.

my daughter did the same thing about that age. It's probably a stage and it will pass. My daughter LOVED staying at her grandparent's house, in fact, once I took her there she couldn't get rid of me fast enough. Then one day she just broke down and didn't want me to leave. It has nothing to do with the GP's and I'm sure it will pass. Not sure how long it took for my daughter to want to stay over there again, but it was not long. I know within the year the phase had passed. Just give him some time and this too shall pass.

good luck

If you have been around him every second he has been with them and you can say for sure that they didn't do anything to make him upset, then it is most likely a phase and I would just ride it out. It will get better. I am sure that the adults know that kids that age are unpredictable.
My little girl wants to talk to her da on the phone during the day and then sometimes when he calls she will say NO. Sometimes they just don't like to talk. They are mighty busy sometimes. Explain to the gparents that he is going through a phase and don't like to talk on the phone but it is nothing personal.
Just be patient, her will come out of it.

I don't think there is necessarily anything that you can do to change how your child reacts. I would just speak with the grandparents and reassure them that your son is just being a child, and not to take it personally. Who knows why a 3 year old's mind does some of the things that it does!?! They do not rashionalize things that same way adults do. To fix the problem you would have to understand why your child does this. Since you can't do that, I would just not push him to go to his grandparents and the problem will probably take care of itself with time...probably a short period of time.

He is old enough to ask why he does not want to talk to his grandparents. Has anything happened when he visited that upset him, or is he being a normal child? Maybe another older person who reminds him of his grandparents have made him unhappy or uncomfortable. After talking and finding out he is just going through a phase, I would try to think of something very pleasant he could do as a reward the next time he talked with his grandparents. Keep the conversation short and reward him with a walk, a treat or something he enjoys doing. My daughter-in-law gives my grandson a reward when he is sick and must go to the doctor. Sometimes it is a book or something he can enjoy while he is getting well; he is so polite and nice to the doctor. For a short period of time to get him through this phase I would rather reward good behavior than to punish him and create tension with his loving grandparents.

I agree...wait for him to want to talk on the phone to them. My kids have never been one to talk on the phone. They love video teleconferencing and talking to the grandparents when they can see them on the computer but we don't make a big deal out of them not wanting to talk on the phone. There are times though that they will talk non-stop so it makes up for the non-talking days. =)

I am Nana also and I have 5 grandkids. This is 'normal' behavior. When my grandkids didn't want to talk on the phone anymore, I started sending cards in the mail and little books and such. Six months, this will all be a thing of the past. Don't make too big of a deal about it.

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I was never allowed to treat my grandparents this way without consequences. I would just let the grandparents know that it isn't them, and then talk to your son about when it happens again. He needs to learn now he has to show them respect, no matter how he feels. My niece does the same thing to my mother-in-law and it breaks her heart. Her mother does absolutely nothing to curb the behavior (in fact, she tends to nurture it) and it has just gotten worse over time. Hopefully it is just a phase that will pass.

You wait for him to want to talk on the phone again. No big deal.

When the grandparents come have them take a low key approach. First tell him, it is NOT okay to not talk to nana and grandpa. When they are here, if you behave that way, we will have fun without you ... when you are ready you can join us (or some version of this ... avoid the "you hurt their/my feelings" talk. He is not in the power position). Have them give a warm verbal greeting (Hi Johnny, we missed you - no hug) but then ignore him. Then you and hubby plus the grandparents can sit on the couch and have an animated time with lots of warmth and laughter. Maybe even have nana read one of your son's favorite books to the group all the while ignoring him. Be sure to laugh and hug and just have irresistable FUN! He will want to be part of the group ... allow him to come in his time. As long as he has an attitude, pay him zero attention even if he throws a fit ... that means ZERO attention! Even go into the kitchen and prepare your food together or bake his favorite treat all the while talking (with animation) about what you all are doing ... this will work.

Perhaps you can visit them once a week and then they come to your house once a week, so your son will have at least two sessions per week.

Don't change your routine. When he throws a tantrum. Just tell him, "let me know when you are done" don't give him any response to his action. After a few attempts he will stop. Then tell him Mommy, Daddy and (whom ever the tantrum is over)love you very much and it hurts Mommy, Daddy and (Whomever the tantrum) over very much when he acts this way. Might take awhile, but he will get over it!

I would NOT worry about this. My son is also 3 and has done the same thing. After a period of time spent not talking to his grandparents, he now LOVES talking on the phone with them again.