Bye Bye Money :(

We have a ton of bills too. Usually some $$$ left over for fun but we really racked it up for Christmas and are still paying it off. I just budgeted for the month and told hubby we only have $50 of fun money for each weekend. Sadly, he already spent most of this weekend's allowance on an oil change
:(

You know, misery loves company so I just thought I'd tell you I won't be doing any shopping or eating out this month either.

We are in the same boat. I am trying to balance out shoving money in savings, and paying off debt. It's a real challenge! But, I like to think, well if we get this paid off then we will have X amount more each month. Like we just paid off a small loan we took to help us move: That's an extra 185 a month!

Wish we could wipe out the student loan debt, that's 1500.00 a month.

It will feel SO good to pay off that debt. You have to think long term. Thoughts of "wait, I could spend that on..." is what got you $30k in debt in the first place. Paying it off might not be fun, but it is definitely the right thing to do!

Congrats on paying off Kohl's and Target already! Now go cut those cards in half!

When my husband and I did our "debt snowball", we listed our debts in order from least to greatest on a huge orange posterboard we put on the wall in our office closet. When we paid one off, we had a little ceremony where we both held the sharpie as we marked through the paid-off debt and recalculated the new bigger payment on the next debt. It was kinda cheesy, but we stayed excited about it!! Also, it helped to think about how someone was making money off our stupid past choices. We'd get mad and want to put more $$ towards the debt. It was a very freeing experience!

Good luck to you!!!

Oh my goodness, I can't tell you how freeing it is to get rid of credit card debt. 2 years ago my husband worked his little hiney off for an entire year so that he could get a large enough bonus to pay off our $23k credit card debt, which we accumulated together during college, med school & residency. Yes, writing out those huge checks really hurt--but, we have changed our ways and now pay off our credit card in its entirety EVERY month, no matter what.

You know what DOESN'T hurt? Not having to stress over this giant crater of debt.

Bye bye money? No it's called putting on your big girl pants and taking care of your financial responsibilities. You are doing a great job paying off your bills. Good for you!

How about deciding on a small reward when you reach certain goals? Like when you've paid off an entire bill or paid $5000 on a large bill you and your hubby treat yourself to a night out spending $100.

As far a new clothes for the kids how about hitting up a consignment shop, Goodwill, or Savers? Most of my clothes come from consignment because why spend $75 for a pair of jeans when I can get the exact same pair for $8 at consignment?

Trust me NOTHING will feel as good as being debt free!

Stick to your guns. You can do this.

That's the "old" self talking. Tell it to BE Quiet!

A.:

Being debt free is a WONDERFUL feeling!! knowing what is coming in the mail is the electric, gas, water and NO DEBT sooooo worth it.

As to using ALL of the money to pay debt. if there are things you NEED - then buy what you need - using CASH not credit to do so. Get used to paying cash for things.

Please remember to set aside "funny money" - if all you are doing is paying your debt - you will end up getting frustrated and blowing it - by saying ENOUGH!! I WANT X!! So set aside "funny money" so that you don't feel strangled by snow balling and paying everything off...

When we went cash only in 2006 - that was our first mistake - we forgot funny money - we got back on track but set what we felt FOR US was funds that would not detract us from paying our debt but allowing us some "fun" too. it worked.

YOU CAN DO THIS!! I know it's hard. I know how nice it is to whoop out the AMEX card and "charge it"...but paying cash and being debt free is SUCH a nice feeling!!

Good for you! If you don't mind me asking (rhetorically, I don't really want the answer)---what about the other $500 you were able to put towards debt? I ask that not to get in your business but to "crack the whip" on you to keep up with your goals. In your previous post you said you'd be able to put 3k/month towards debt. Don't slip and end up not holding up to your goals! Unless that 500 is planned, going to a savings tool, don't siphon off a couple hundred here, a few hundred there, and derail your progress.
Just remember when you think "Wait, I could spend that on...." answer it (even verbally so you can hear it) "NO, that's not "real" money---I will not spend it on ___, it is already owed elsewhere!" Suze Orman calls that kind of thinking "living a lie" because you don't really have that money. You're in the red. You can only spend what is in the black, and can only feel like you're "safe" and building when you're in the green.
Someone else suggested it, but it's what we did too so I want to reiterate: add up all the money that you're paying debt off with every month. Now instead of seeing it as "sheesh, all this money we're not getting to keep" think "If we pay this amount for this long, then by this date, we will have this much EXTRA every month to do things we need, and even some stuff we don't necessarily need but just want!" Imagine putting aside your $3k/month (for 12 months) as a $36,000 RAISE! How diligently and happily would you work at a job, knowing that if you finished this one temporary project, you would get promoted and get a $36k/year raise ($3k/month that you've earmarked for debt payment)? That's like a whole 2nd income. Very cool! I'm excited for you guys!
YOU CAN DO IT!

Actually, you kissed it goodbye when you bought with the credit cards.
Now you're paying the piper.
Stick with it!
Once the debt is gone and you are not paying interest, you'll have more money available for yourself.
If you are paying interest on anything - someone else is making a living off of you.
Once your debt is gone, use cash as much as possible and pay off the credit cards every month (don't spend more than you can pay off).

it is just like losing a lot of weight. When your 150lbs overweight you really don't see the joy in losing 10 lbs. In fact you don't see it and no one else does so it is easy to give up for the immediate gratification that got you there to begin with. The joy and freedom will come but the satisfaction won't hit you until you are able to deposit your paychecks and and pay for things at the store and your done....no bill showing up in the mail reminding you that the items are broken, stained or unused but you still have to pay for the item plus interst. Congrats on moving toward a sound future.

Well, the attitude of "Wait! I can spend that on..." is what got you $30k into debt in the first place.

It's going to take awhile to get out of that "instant gratification" mindset, but you can do it!

The kids don't need new clothes. The house doesn't need anything right now. Make sure you give yourself a little spending money each month, so you don't feel too deprived, but otherwise, keep that wallet closed!

Good luck, you can do it!

Just remember that you do not HAVE money to spend on new clothes/toys/fast food that you do not even need, because that money was just borrowed with interest and you are working on returning it... learn to be happy with what you have, and every time you have an urge, remember how freeing it will be to finally not be burdened in debt... and how much better it will be if you SAVE excess money in college/home/retirement/vacation funds for your family. In the meantime, cut up those credit cards. The more money you pay back... the more money you will eventually freely have in your pocket.

SO Cool!!! Keep it up!

When my hubby and I did Dave Ramesy and the debt snowball we made a list on a 1/4 poster size board. Then with each debt we paid off we would cross it out with a big black Sharpie. It was the best feeling ever!! We would have a beer, cross it off, and have a mini-celebration of our step towards financial freedom. ;) You will get there, and it's an amazing feeling when you do!

It might help to go visit a state funded nursing home. I know this seems kind of twisted but it might help you keep your perspective on the future. I recently visited one of those homes and it is awful. Makes me want to be extremely smart with my money. It is all part of establishing good money habits to help ensure a comfortable retirement.

Add up your current monthly income.

Imagine being able to spend it ALL - which you can when you have no debt.

EVERY MONTH....from here on out.

:)

I like how you claim to be the *frugal* one, maybe your in denial about your spending habits...........kohls and target sound like the 'female' debts, not typical of a 'husband' debt. Now it's time to CUT THESE CARDS UP, who needs cards with 18% + interest on them?

You can do this, credit cards are a waste of money.

The instant gratification of shopping is what started this whole mess for you. Sit back and think about how much those new clothes and household items are REALLY costing you. Look at that little section of the credit card that shows you how much you are REALLY paying if you make minimum payments. That should be a bit of motivation for you right there. You are paying thousands more just to be stressed out each month. Your net worth is lower because of credit. Your options are more limited with the bills you have to pay. You are complicating your life unnecessarily. I imagine your kids have plenty of clothes. New ones might be nice, but do they truly have a need for it? I also imagine your house has plenty of "stuff" too. Think about the freedom you will have in the future. Extra money because you have not only payed down debt, but have also learned to be a more discriminant shopper. Less stress. More options. A more stable financial future. It's not going to be easy. You will have to do without and maybe be a little less impulsive. But you will have gained so much. You can do this. It will get easier. Eye on the prize mama. Eye on the prize!

Think of how awful that debt makes you feel. It's just hanging over your heads ready to crush you at any moment. It's getting bigger with each billing cycle. Now, picture it gone! Your heads are safe! Your debt woes are over. You can buy things with cash/debit and know that no bill will come. Instead of paying on a $20 shirt for 5 years and paying many times more than that 20, you will have paid only that $20. :) HTH . Best wishes to you and your family in your debt reduction. Keep us updated.

Congrats to you. It will feel wonderful eventually. Right now, you might consider reminding yourself what you actually bought with that money you just sent off. As in, not that you "paid off Target" or "paid off Khol's", but that you just paid for "the Christmas presents you bought at Target 3 years ago, the ipod, the video games, the school supplies, the ______". Or you just paid for "the outfit you had your daughter's school pictures made in last year, that came from Kohl's" or the "wedding present for ____ that you bought at Kohl's".. etc. Try to think a little more tangibly.

It is hard, I know. But one of the problems with credit cards is exactly what you are describing... we end up buying things we really won't even remember in a year or two or three.... so are they REALLY worth borrowing to pay for them? Usually not. But on credit it doesn't seem like "real" money, does it? NOW, as you pay the cards/debts off, seriously try to remember what you are actually paying for. The shoes, the purses, the makeup, the "fun" shirt, the _____.... allllll those little things. It may not seem like it now, but it really will help you in the future when you get ready to swipe a card. You will think twice about it and wonder: "Will I even remember what I bought in 6 months?" (or even NEXT month?). The answer for me, a lot of the time, is NO. And in those cases, I do NOT use credit. Period. I DO still use a credit card for major purchases (only when I already have the cash to send in and clear the balance back to zero), so I can get the points/cash back rewards. BUT, I also can tell you everything I have used the card for, because they weren't little incidental trivial purchases. It does change your mind set a bit.
Good luck, and good going so far! Keep with it!

Make it a competition with yourself. That will help. How much you can tackle each month. Pour yourself a glass of wine when you mail those checks out and congratulate yourself. THAT will take the place of "buying" something.

Also, think of it this way. You ALREADY bought something. You are just paying for it now. Make sense? That's why you owe the money, because you already got that fun sense of having something new. Ignore the push to buy something else because you already did that.

I hope that helps!
Dawn

wow, what a terrific start on freeing yourself of that awful, heavy, crushing burden! if you are truly disciplined you could allow yourself a small treat with each paycheck, say $40 on clothes or the house, but don't let it snowball, and keep paying off those credit cards! and if you feel your resolve wavering, keep the prior months' statements so you can run and look at the total going down. THAT feels amazing!
khairete
S.

Yay! Keep going A.!! You are tackling debt, what a good thing to do!

My hubby and I are very tight on money. This is a long story but things are gradually getting easier for us, he is earning more money etc. But anyways, we have sometimes made a "game" of not eating out anything for a whole month. Not one lunch, not take out food, nothing. I am not sure about the rest of you ladies, but that is harder than you think! Don't get me wrong, I cook alot, as any of you who have seen my posts/answers know, but, everyone has some takeout or eats out sometimes right? Anyways, instead of being morose about it, we have made it funny, like let's see what can I cook up tonight? I dig into the back of the cupboards and back of the freezer to concoct recipes, we help each other like if one of us is like "let's go out" the other one stops them. Anyways, see what you can do to make it a game. :-)

Well it will be amazing to be out of debt for sure. We have no credit card debt, and our cars are paid off and such, so I cannot imagine having the kind of debt you do. BUT my suggestion for you urge to shop, thrift stores. Seriously take 20 bucks and go to your local goodwill, arc or salvation army, it is fun to even just go browse.

Trust me..... being debt free (except the house right now) is an AMAZING feeling. My hubby and I are raising 4 sons and I only work part time from home. Basically we survive on his income alone and not having any debt hanging over our heads is wonderful.

I also can get into a justification spending spree and I've had to force myself to stop doing that. Going to a strict cash budget has helped a lot with seeing where our money is going. Plus, I've found it very satisfying to see how much cash I have left in my groceries/household (diapers, paper towels, etc.) each month.

The climb to being debt free is hard, no doubt about it. But the feeling of being debt free is indescribable. I promise. Every time you want to spend money, you should think.... that shelf is $20 less than I can have paid off on my credit card. And yes, $20 (or less) is a lot of money.

Keep plugging away. It will make a difference and you will be happier without debt than you would ever be with the best clothes, decor, etc. and a mound of debt.

Once the debt is gone you will have more to spend on all the things you want - since you won't be paying interest on all that debt. You are actually lucky... to be able to pay out $2500 in old debt and still some how pay on everything else like food, housing & utilities. Personnaly I have to choose between getting the things we need and keeping the utilities on, the credit cards have been let go - since what you just paid out on 3 credit cards this check is about 1/4 of what we made last year to support a family of 7.

You go girl!!!!!!!!! You don't need any more "stuff"!!

oh hang in there though...it will be SO good for you!! are you doing Dave Ramsey??? i would REALLY recommend it - if only for the success stories. it sounds like you need some - go to daveramsey.com and listen to some of the testimonials. you can do this and it will be SO worth it!!! think how they are ripping you off with those interest rates! YIKES!! you can do this :)

I'll stray from the recent norm and avoid the snide opening comments as some have posted.
Good for you and yours. You are making a mental, emotional and financial decision that is and will no doubt effect your family and it's happenings for a few years.
Stick with it!

It should be called HELLO MONEY!

We live debt-free. We even sold our house and now rent, which was THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE. We pay our credit cards off every month and I love it. We pay cash for many of our purchases AND just booked a vacation to Maui for 8 days, which I can pay for today, but I put it on my CC for points. I can't got on vacation and relax knowing I actually owe somebody, so our vacations are paid for before we ever leave.

We literally, do not spend money on random things. Don't give your husband a credit card. If he needs something so bad, then you get to go with him and decide together. Budget it out, so he gets a certain amount of money for clothing a year....and if there is something special he needs, then it gets discussed.

I was the spender is our relationship at the beginning. When we got married, I wasn't working (finishing grad school), so I was careful about HIS money. It ended up being a wonderful thing. We literally think about how bad we need something. Do we NEED it or just WANT it.

We put $2K aside each month for vacations. We have 4 kids and want to travel with them, so we have to have enough money to do the things we want. We pay US first and then our bills. It keeps us straight on our priorities.

We buy clothes for the kids at Children's Orchard, which are either new or practically new. I just bought 2 pairs of shorts (Hurley and Mossimo) for $2.99 each that look like they've been washed twice. They sell new for $20-$50 each. This last run to Children's Orchard I spent $34 and got 11 items for my kids.

Sometimes I revert back, it's like an addict. I can go to Target for 2 things and end up with 15 things in my basket. I do 1 of 2 things. I walk around the store long enough (before I buy them) to realize those were impulse buys and then I go back around and put everything back and feel my power/self-control coming back OR I ask myself, "Is this worth spend $X on now and then selling it in a garage sale in a year for $1? I usually end with only what I came in for. Sometimes not. Last time, I ended up with a $9 purchase that I didn't need, so I had my husband return it unopened with the receipt.

Once you see that money not being given away, you'll feel awesome! Start a savings acct with a goal (how much do you wan to save and for what) and you'll feel great watching it grow, rather than your CC balances!

I'm really proud of you. It can be really hard to make changes, but you are doing it!

Congratulations on your first big payment! Think about all of the things you can do with the money you won't be throwing away on INTEREST PAYMENTS on that debt! That will feel really good! My advice is TRACK IT - keep track of all of your debt that you are whittling away at. Maybe even make a chart of how much progress you've made. It motivates you to stick with it! 30K is a lot of debt to get rid of quickly, but you can do it!
Since it's going to take a while, be sure to budget in a little fun money even into your debt repayment scheme. Just like a healthy diet, if you have a chance to indulge in some fun, reasonably protioned dessert once in a while, it makes sticking to your diet easier. Be sure to choose something that gets you a big bang of fun for few bucks - like instead of a trip to the mall, go to the beach! It's GORGEOUS right now in SoCal, and the beach doesn't cost anything. We went last weekend, and spent $20 on parking and ice cream bars at the end of the day - 7 hours of fun for 5 people on 20 bucks is pretty good. And the kids were EXHAUSTED! Fun for mom & dad too.
Also, there's a good website for free museum days in the LA area. Lots of children's museums are included such as the Discovery Center or the Bowers museum in Santa Ana. This is a great way to still have a great time on a budget!

Well done!! Taking the first step is always the hardest part! I always console myself that keeping a good credit record is our "safety net" for when we REALLY need something when we don't have the cash! You WILL feel better when you have cleared your debt ... I promise! :)

Yes, debt is bad, horrid and no fun but so is going with out - I only say this because I want to make sure you are not going with out entirely to pay off the debt. I commend you on having a plan and sticking to it - I also hope that there is money for a rainy day being set aside, I also hope that each child has a bank acct with "their" names on it where monthly an amt goes in automatically for "oh SnarkY" moments that come up in life - my son has one 50/mo is all we can affoard - same for the dogs 50/month just in case something happens with them. I tell you there is nothing worse than paying off a large chunk of bills with out having set some aside for everyone just in case things happen. My man thinks "that's what credit cards are for" - I learned the hard way that his way is not the best way. Ok, so I am done ranting - like I said I hope you have included oh no money for every member of the family in your budget.

Remember, everything that you pay means you save interest. When you need a reality check, calculate the interest you would have paid if you kept paying the minimum. If you need to buy something for the house or kids, put $5 or $10 aside out of each check for it. Maybe it'll take a long time, but better to pay cash and really only pay $20 for that backpack than use a card and pay 19% interest for months. Interest is basically money thrown out the window. You will SAVE that when you pay them off.

Good job! Give yourself a pat on the back!

Don't cut everything out of your life--schedule in some _small_ fun things. For example, if you're wanting to treat yourself to a new blouse, hit the thrift store instead of going to the mall. You'd be amazed at what you can find (I found an supercute Aeropostale skirt for $5, a Jones of NY collared knit top for $3).

Make it fun- For example, if you want pizza, get the shells & sauce & cheese at the store and some of your fav toppings & have a movie night at home. Or, buy pita bread & have everyone make their own 'za & have fun doing it. :)

If you can get DH to agree, have him give you the credit cards for safe keeping. That is what my SIL did--she was the spender and had a ton of CC debt when she married my brother. It took them a while, but she gave him control of the credit cards, and they talked about any purchases before he handed the card to her, to make sure that it was really needed.

I recommend the following resources for inspiration & to find out ways to save even more:
www.cannywomen.com
The Tightwad Gazette (get if from the library--about 5,000 ideas on saving money)

I have never even thought of having a separate account for the dogs. That is where our credit cards are used, Petsmart and Banfield.

You can do this. We actually got a loan from the bank and paid off the credit cards. With just one payment it is so much easier. And I now I get antsy when I see a balance.

Keep up the good work.

My birthday is next month and for my birthday present I am getting myself debt free. I have been working on it for almost two years now but next month is my LAST PAYMENT on my LAST CREDIT CARD!!! I have been paying more the last few months so that next month I could make one final lump payment. OMG I am so excited to take the money I would normally put to a credit card and stick it in my savings, *tear runs down cheek. I pray to God that I don't get into credit card debt ever again (I'm building a savings account but you never know whats in store 10 years down the road), its one of the worst things that has ever happened to me.

Keep up the good work! It feels SO FRIGIN good to know that eventually the money you are making you will actually get to KEEP! <3

Delayed gratification

Think of how good you will feel when you are free of evil debt.

Living debt free is SO worth it.

It will feel so good to have the burden of that debt lifted! You did the right thing! Whenever you are tempted to spend, remind yourself that that money was actually already spent and then think about all the things you already bought on credit. You will feel so blessed! Keep up the good hard work!

Reminder: you will feel sooooooooooooo good when the debt is paid off. As Dave Ramsey says, "You have to live like no other (be frugal) so that you can live like no other (debt free). Hang in there!!!

It will feel great once you pay the first one off, and then eventually you will be debt free and it will be amazing, and very secure!!! You'll be able to buy x,y, and z, but without guilt or putting your family in a precarious situation. Listen to Dave Ramsey's radio show (also available for free as a podcast) to get inspired and keep you going strong.

We all have to pay the piper. It is now your turn. Yes it would be nice to go do it but you have to remember that you still have all that outstanding debt to clear. Yes it is hard to not just go buy stuff but hold off. Ask yourself the questions- do you really NEED it? Or is it just a want? Wait 24 hours and then see if you still want it before you buy it.

You will be fine.

Just keep plugging away and it will soon be gone and then you can go buy it outright without putting it on a credit card.

The other S.

PS As another person mentioned delayed gratification.

You will start to feel the satisfaction as you see progress! You will be proud of yourself for making the right choices and think how amazing you will feel on that day when you make the LAST payment! And think how GREAT and guiltless that shopping spree will be after! I went through this when I had my first daughter. My husband is a Marine and gone a lot so I chose not to go back to work when I had her. We had only a little debt but once I stopped working it took a long 18 mos to pay it off. I bought nothing for myself for two years. We had no cable. I couldn't drive because I couldn't afford gas. I paid the bills, bought groceries and diapers and had no money left over. I remember once the bagger at the store accidentally put my meat in the cart of the person in front of me and I just sat there and cried in the store because I knew I couldn't buy any more for a week. It was HARD! But we got through it and its over and it was worth it. I don't have that strain anymore!

Congratulations! That's awesome. I remember feeling just like you. It gets easier, I promise. The 'incredible lightness of being' feeling you get when you are cc debt free is SOOOOOO worth it!

that money was long gone when you swiped the credit card.

I live debt free and love it. My entire adult life I have lived on 1/2 of my earnings and now I get the chance to work 20 hrs a week and still cover all the bills so I can spend more time with my beautiful baby. It is a great feeling. I get my "high" from seeing my savings account go up and when I get a great deal on the things I do buy. I use my credit card for everything but in 10 years I have never paid a cent of interest because I pay it off every month.

Just stick with it, and pay everything off. The longer you go without spending the more natural it will become. You will feel liberated. You will also have a very noticeable decrease in stress. Keep up the good work.