Birthday Party End Time for 10Yr Old

Updated on May 22, 2011
N.V. asks from Homewood, IL
16 answers

I am running out of time (and ideas) for planning my daughter's b-day party. She wants a pool party and I unfortunately told her she could have one before I checked the details. The local pool ONLY rents the facility for parties 8pm-10pm. I feel this is too late for ten year olds. I even suggested we save this plan for her 13th b-day party. My daughter of course disagrees using the "nobody has a 9pm bedtime on summer weekends" excuse. I have tried to steer her toward other ideas. Like me, once she has her heart set on something, it's difficult to get her to focus in another direction. Any ideas as to what I should do? I feel just awful!
(P.S. There are 24 in her class and she has lots of cousins so we need a large venue)

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Its her 10th birthday!! She should get to party til 10p!
I say book the pool, and those who think its too late will just decline the invite.

M.

2 moms found this helpful
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G.S.

answers from New York on

Hi, is there a roller ring near you. I used to have a blast going to those kind of parties. I'm 41 now, so this was back in the mid 80's. I'd do it again if they had them around.

More Answers

K.L.

answers from Redding on

Do you have a friend who has a pool? We borrowed a friends back yard and pool one time for our sons birthday. Of course he was friends with the familes son so it was fun for the pool family too. We made sure the party kids came thru a side gate, and only used the bathroom in the laundry area near the pool. I supplied all the towels and cake, and everything. I did all the clean up after and made sure the yard was perfect before we left and then sent them a nice thankyou card. It was fun and they were more than happy to share.

1 mom found this helpful
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A.H.

answers from Tuscaloosa on

Maybe call some of the parents of the kids your invting and ask them if 10pm is to late. If so tell your daughter that her friends can't come to a party that late.

But ultimately since you are the mom and you are the one paying for it you have the desicion to make...not her.

1 mom found this helpful
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C.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'm usually pretty uptight about bedtimes, but I don't think that's too late if it's a weekend, especially during the summer. Lots of kids that age have sleepover parties and stay up a lot later than that. However, I am a former lifeguard and there's no way I would have that many kids for a pool party. The lifeguards (I assume they have them) can't be expected to supervise that many kids so I would be sure to have plenty of extra, responsible adults. Good luck.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

It's not about bedtime. It's about ten year olds getting cranky at the end of the day. (but that's just me...:) )

If it were me, I'd organize a treasure hunt at a local park. Maybe some sort of scavenger hunt they can break up into teams for? Or organize some games that are suitable for 'tens'. Another idea would be to meet up at a roller rink, but that could get expensive, depending on if they would give a discount for renting the place and skate rentals, but it is one idea to look into. But for myself, I'd find something to do outside during the day. It probably wouldn't be the worst thing in the world to have a party that late, and whoever comes, comes. It might be, though, that families with younger children at home might need some assistance with carpooling to get their older one home from the party. Esp. any single-parent families.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Unless her birthday is in July it is going to be way too cool at night for a bunch of kids to be in the pool that late at night. I would tell her that the time is unacceptable. Maybe you can get some friends moms to tell her their kids can't come due to the hour. That way she'll see them saying no too and decide it isn't what she want's to do.

See what else is available in the area that the kids may not be acquainted with and see about party options. That way you can present her with several options and know the cost and time frame is acceptable for each one.

When it really comes down to it you are the parent and sometimes have to be the bad guy and say "it didn't work out, sorry, but it isn't acceptable".

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P.S.

answers from Houston on

Believe me, no matter what you let her do, she won't be in bed asleep by 10pm on her bday anyway, so let her have the pool party!

L.G.

answers from Eugene on

Rent the pool. Kids whose parents think it's too late will keep them home and all the rest will have a good time.
Rent a lifeguard too. I've pulled kids out of rivers, lakes and swimming pools because they did not know how to swim and that was easier than watching them drown.
If a kid cannot swim they can stay out of the deep water.
Otherwise have a great party. It's certain your daughter will be grateful for a different, exciting party.

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Well YOU are the parent so you set the parameters, not your daughter, no matter how much she complains.
I personally think 8 to 10 is fine during the summer as long as it's not on a weeknight, that's a little late for working parents to be out schlepping their kids around.
I would be more concerned with the number of kids you're going to be hosting at night, in the pool. The whole class, and lots of cousins?! I hope you have several adults staying to help you out. I think a party this big would be more suited to an afternoon at the park.

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S.S.

answers from Daytona Beach on

my kids still go to bed before 9 most nights during the summer (mostly for my sanity :)). anyways, i would call parents or send a note with your daughter to give to her friends that she wants to invite and have the parents call you to see if that's too late. if it is, what about a funhouse place? or an arcade?get a bucket of tokens and then dole them out. if they want more, than they have to pay for them.

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S.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

Well, my daughter is 9 and she doesn't go to bed at 9pm, especially during the summer. If all the invitees are 10 and not younger, I might do it. If you had a sleepover birthday party they would be up a lot later!

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

is it really necessary to rent out the pool? or could you just let everyone swim for an hour or two, then do a cake and presents (maybe a cool pool-themed cake) at a park nearby, or your house?

L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

A one time special thing from 8-10 is not a huge deal.
Let her do the pool thing - it's easy.
LBC

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M.R.

answers from Phoenix on

I think if the party is over promptly at 10p....go swimming.

I would make it a weekend night for parents who have to drive and pick up and need to be in bed themselves if they are working.

Otherwise, I believe the summer is meant to be more relaxed and staying up later for something special will be a lot of fun and very memorable.

HF!

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C.J.

answers from Lancaster on

If you, as the parent, feel it is too late, then it is too late. Tell your daughter firmly but lovingly that 8pm-10pm is too late, and that you are sorry that you said she could have a pool party, but sometimes things happen that change plans.

Then tell her that she can pick a different party idea (have you considered any local parks or state parks? Frequently State Parks have a lake area, and those are open from dawn to dusk). If she ends up pitching a fit or saying that she just HAS to have the pool partly, calmly let her know that pool party is no longer an option. She may have it for her 12th or 13th or whatever you feel fit. Let her know that she may pick another idea, or she won't have a party at all. It might seem extreme, but you'd be surprised what a few firm boundaries can do for a child's opinion on a matter! And if she pulls the "you're ruining everything/my birthday/etc" card, tell her that you are willing to give her a party, just not a pool party this year, and that the only one responsible for ruining her birthday will be her, if she is unable to accept that, sometimes, we have to compromise on things.

That said....Do you really need to invite her entire class? I'm not judging, but it seems like that would be expensive and not entirely worthwhile..Within any class are children that get along well and children that do NOT get along AT ALL. Having the entire class there could well be a bad idea, IMHO.

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