Being Mom and Working from Home

I also attempt to work part time from home. A house keeper (twice a month) and a babysitter two mornings a week is how I'm doing it. No amount of organization will help you when you have a baby or toddler. For last resort I plop her in front of a couple of Dora's. But truth be told, after my next deadline, I'm calling it quits because I want to be my daughter's mommy for a while.

I have been struggling with similar situation and here's what has helped.

1. www.flylady.net has helped me get a grip on the housework! I have mapped out all the housework, groceries etc. for the week and I keep the same schedule each week. Having it all worked out and knowing that I only have certain chores for that day keeps me from being overwhelmed. My house stays clean by getting a little done every day. I toss my laundry in first thing in the morning and run the dishwasher before going to bed. These little things help so much!

2. I HAVE to get up earlier than everyone else. I just have to. Otherwise I get interrupted and I get no work done. Schedule your work either for early morning, at night after everyone is in bed or naptime and stick to it. I get my work done in the mornings and the evenings are my "me" time. Otherwise I'd go insane!

3. I have a big calendar on my fridge (one of the flylady's!) and that is my lifeline! My motto is, if it isn't on the calendar it doesn't exist! I can't plan my week any other way. I'd never keep everything straight otherwise! And that keeps everyone else in the know as well.

4. I list out my menu for the week and I take advantage of my crockpot. At the end of the day when there's soccer practice and gymnastics practice, there is also chaos. So I throw the food in the crockpot in the morning and I don't have to worry about cooking at night when things are crazy! Having my menu planned and the grocery shopping done at the beginning of the week helps me not have to think about it. I couldn't think about it if I wanted to! No time!

5. I have a planner with a page for every day and that's my to-do list for the day. I have to write everything down and sometimes schedule it (I even have down "take out meat for the next day" or else I'd forget!). If I have a big thing to do I break it down and do a little each day. Being in overwhelm just means you don't know where to start. When get overwhelmed I just stop and write stuff down. When it's written down it doesn't seem so crazy!

Good luck! I still have a lot of chaos and I get overwhelmed still too, but these are the things that have kept me from going completely batty!

Hi R.,
Take a deep breath and release it. Don't let the stress overwhelm you into spending more time worrying than getting things done. Making lists or planning things in advance always works better for me.
You don't mention what your husband does to contribute. Get him on board with some of the household responsibilities. You can't do it all. For me, I get up much earlier at 5am (sometimes earlier) to get some quiet time in. Perhaps getting up that early to get some work time in before the house wakes up. Start the coffee and throw a load of laundry in (gather the laundry in the basket the night before). If your husband can, he should take the 2 kids to school.
The night before, have the kids clothes layed out, lunches packed, backpacks and gear ready to go. Not sure if your kids have sit down breakfast at home before hand, but have cereal, instant oatmeal, toast, banana/fruit, etc available for them or dad to fix. If your husband is willing to take on the morning tasks, make sure to stay out of getting distracted from work to help him and the kids out. It may take some time to adjust, but you need your time to do some work.
Not sure how old your little one is, but if he can sit in front of the TV sometime during the day to watch sesame street or a kids movie, that will give you some additional time.
Do you have any other mommy friends who can take your little one for a couple of hours a couple of times a week or arrange a playdate where you can drop off ? Maybe trade with them? E.g. they take your little one for a couple of hours during the day and you take their's for a couple of hours in the evening so they can do out to dinner? For the sports schedule, are there any other friend/team member parent that your kids can carpool with?
Are there any neighbors, older kids your friendly with that wouldn't mind coming over or having your little one over for a little time during the week?
For meals, i like the crock pot ideas. Or buying meats in bulk, breaking them up, marinating them in freezer bags, store in freezer. If you have a variety, you can always take them out of the freezer a day or two in advance and have them ready to cook. Make a veggie dish or salad, have bread/rice/pasta available.
If you can't work in the morning, try at night. Have your husband do the sport pickups, homework, baths/bedtime.

Working from home with a child at home, is not easy...
If at all possible, get someone to come to your home to babysit him for the time you need to work. As you said, your business is failing.

That is what my friend did. And only then was she actually able to "work."

I do work from home too, but I don't have a boss. It just my own website shop thing. So I do as I want.

And you do need to have a "schedule" of your DAILY things and obligations...otherwise nothing will get done. You need a schedule....
just working while/if a child naps, is not going to be enough time for working. Or, you work late at night when everyone is sleeping. But that will mean less sleep for you.

All the best,
Susan

I also work at home. It is not my business but I understand. I only have to work 5 hours a day, but while I'm taking care of two little ones (mine and my nieice, its hard. It helps a little when the other two come home from school but sometimes its worse!
I work a some in the morning right after I come back from taking my children to school. I have some fun file folder games that the two little ones can do on their own or with minimal help from me.
8:15 drop my children off at school
8:20-8:30 eat my breakfast and take my meds
8:30-9:00 work
9:00-9:10 flip the laundry (put the stuff in the dryer in the basket, clothes in the washer are flipped in to the dryer and new things are put in the washer. fold and put away laundry while my daughter gets dressed and eats.)
9:10-20 make sure my daughter is dressed and eats. My SIL will usually bring my neice to me between 8-10
9:20-10:30 work
10:30-11:00 filp laundry and put away clothes or at least fold them for the children to put away
11:-12 work
12-1: lunch with the girls flip the laundry
1:00-:1:40 work
1:40-2:10 flip the laundry
2:10-3:20 work
3:20-3:40 pick up children
3:40-5:30 work as much as I can while the children do their chores. Even the 3 year old has chores.
5:60-6:30 help the children with homework while I fix dinner.
6:30 DH comes home, we eat dinner
7-7:30 we get ready for bed
7:30-8 if the children are ready for bed we read to them, scripture stories, fiction, non-fiction. right now all stories are geared toward childen, as they grow, the maturity level of the books can also evolve.
8-8:30 tuck children into bed.
8:30-9 get myself ready for bed.
9-10:30 work
10:30-10:45 pack dinner for DH
10:45 give kisses to DH as he leaves for his second job
10:47 go to bed
This is just a sample of course. Flylady can help. plan meals in advance. orgjunkie.com has a menu planning Monday that might help. Plan your time. There is no way to get everything done unless you do. Get a big desk planner and put everyone's schedule on their-including yours. Working at home you can plan around the important stuff. Get the children involved. They can work. My children sweep the kitchen (mop it weekly), clean out the dishwasher, load the dishwasher, put away their own clothes and other clean laundry, clean their rooms, clean the bathroom, make and change their own beds, vacuum, etc. No one said you had to do it all yourself.
Get rid of the extra stuff. Stuff includes things-I give mine to a local thrift store that supports big brothers big sisters. You can even schedule a time for them to come to you. Then you put it out on the curb and they pick it up. Time-if your children are involved in too many sports or other activities, make them choose the ones they really like. I've noticed lots of other good responses too. Sorry this is so long but I really wanted to give you specifics. Good luck.

I am in a similar boat as you. For me I've learned it's impossible to try and do what you're doing and get anything done. And when my little one (who is 8 months old) is up I feel guilty working on my business and nap time just isn't enough time to get any work done let alone get dinner ready, the house cleaned etc. I totally get it. What I've had to do is a couple of days a month take my little one to a neighbor's house for the day. I found a GREAT stay at home mommy with teenagers who loves having a baby around a few days a month (and of course I pay her). Those days are my catch up days and I devote the entire day to my business. In order to not feel guilty I've had to decide I simply am NOT working when my child is awake. I am a stay at home mom because I wanted to spend as much time with him as I could. If I'm working when he's awake I might as well be at a job and not at home. Hope this helps.

Flylady.net is so fantastic. Can be tailored to your specific needs (adjust her "assignments" to fit your lifestyle better) but basically, helps create a daily rhythm. I never have to ask myself "What should I do now?" cuz I know what I'm supposed to do every day of the week. Good luck!

I work at home and find that it is impossible to do anything when my son is awake. I send him off to a babysitter very close by (within walking/jogging distance since we only have one car) three mornings a week, and work during nap time each day as well. For me, it is worth taking him and getting those extra hours in. Last summer I hired a 12 year old to watch him at home while I worked (he was about 9 months then). It was nice having him so close, I could stop and help or nurse him, and still get work done (this can also be pretty cheap).

You can try to create a baby safe office, or move your computer to somewhere that your child is while he plays and try to work, but don't expect too much. The other thing about working when they are awake and doing things is that you miss out on them. When I did that, I felt like I was always trying to work, and just missing what he was doing.

Have your husband help! Cleaning, watching the baby and other kids for even an hour will help.

I work in the evenings when I don't get everything done, once my son goes to sleep, or my husband will watch him then. It's really hard if you have a big project and are doing that for weeks on end, but we need the money, and I know that it will always end and I can go back to having my weekends.

Try to separate your work and baby or family time as much as possible. Don't check emails or go and do little things if you only have a minute, it will just frustrate everyone. I have problems with this last one.

I had to stop my work from home job. Unless I can do it at night after my son goes to sleep, I just can't make it work. I felt like I was neglecting him all day because I was trying to hush him up while I was on the phone. It made me sad.

I have been working from home since my son was born 2 years ago. Some days i feel like crying because I think I am neglecting him. I didn't work when my other two (now teens) were home. I find that I do the bulk of my computer work at night when they are all hanging out with dad. Then in the early morning after they get off to work and school, I let the little guy watch PBS in my room (where my desk is) and enjoy his cheerios and banana. I use this time to address pressing issues. Usually about an hour is good for this. Then I spend the day with him until nap time (which is not everyday unfortunately). I work when he naps, and when he gets up, I turn off the computer. Period. Dad is more than capable of cleaning what doesn't get done during the day, and sometimes dishes pile up and laundry too, but that's the way it goes. My other children pitch in as well, so I am fortunate in that.Family first. Always. Don't stress out. Breathe and know that at least you are home with your child, and you are the one caring for him. Could I go to an office and have peace of mind? Never? I'd get paid much more and lord knows I could use it, but being here works best for me.

I am a stay at home mom who works part-time at home. You just have to be organized and get the children understand that you have to do work too. What helps me is a dry erase board. It helps me to remember things for their school and activities. I also use it for making sure I have time for work. Schedule it like you would for an doctors appointment. I also bought a V-tech it is so much fun my kids don't want to get off it and they learn while they play. I also have a timer I set so they get the same amount of time on it. That way there are no fights.

Hi R.,

While I'm not a stay at home Mom, I do own my own business, work full-time at another and have an almost 2 year old son. I am not totally in your shoes, but still must balance work/life/husband. I am in a mastermind group and we just recently had this discussion because it is a common issue.

You have received some great advice (I haven't read everything) about getting organized. I especially like the post from Patty M. Remember to take baby steps. The thought having to do everything will shut you down and you won't get anything done. Every night make organized lists. I don't know what your business is, so I am giving general advice.

Get a timer and spend 15-30 minutes each morning, afternoon and evening reading and responding to emails (no more than that timer allows)

Use the timer method for each list item and focus 100% on it for the alotted time.

Have you heard of virtual assistants? They are not as expensive as you might think, and may be able to help you with some little things that overwhelm you (even just 10 hours per month could help). some ideas: social media, bookkeeper, a person to respond to basic inquiries, etc.

Create a daily schedule and stick to it. Make it big and post it in your office and let your entire family know what it is.

Ask for help from family or friends. Are there other Moms who might be willing to trade days for driving your older kids to school/sports activities?

Take one day for yourself/family - meaning, make sure you schedule in something you enjoy whether it be reading in the bathtub or 1/2 hour or getting a manicure. the rest of the day should be spent enjoying your time as a family - playing.

Allow yourself one day to breathe deep, close your eyes, focus on your end goal. Then pull out a piece of paper and start writing down, in no particular order everything that you need to do each day, everything that needs to get done monthly/weekly, etc. Then number each item in order of importance. Take the top 10 items and start with the easiest one. Make sure to go back and cross it off when it's done. The sense of accomplishment will motivate you to move to the next item. After you've written your tasks down and organized them, you can then put them in your calendar, but keep that big piece of paper out and visual for the time being.

Good luck and remember, you're not alone.

-S.

I don't know exactly how to help because I have had the same issue, but have you thought about hiring someone to watch your son for a few hours while you are working. Maybe a neighbor or friend who is home with kids as well. I have a neighbor who works from home, and I watch her boys for a few hours each week so she can get some work done. It is nice to have a little bit of extra money coming in for me, and she gets a ton of work done! Just a thought... :)