Baby Won't Eat When He Is at the Babysitter

I might try formula. When baby tastes mommy milk, without the mommy...... maybe he's getting mad? I've heard of this. They get confused and then upset because part is the same, but part is different.

I know - I might get lamblasted for suggesting formula if he's b'feeding successfully. But since he's not bottle feeding breast milk successfully you've got to do SOMETHING so he eats.

Good Luck

Does your friend give the baby bottled milk when she is at home? I know some babies don't care for expressed milk if it's the wrong temperature, or from the wrong kind of bottle, etc.

I was lucky, and my DD wasn't picky about what bottle I used... but she would NOT drink it unless it was quite hot! My hubby used to think I would burn her giving it to her *that* hot... but that was the only way she would drink it. (And it wasn't hot enough to burn her... around the temperature I use to make hot cocoa. lol.)

ETA After your SWH...~The babysitter COULD try using a straw to get some food into baby... I remember once babysitting for my cousin, and she had forgotten to put a nipple on the bottle she sent with him! (She just had one of those flat lids on it...) So I used a straw, and would dip it into the formula, trap it with my finger, then very carefully allowed small amounts to run into his mouth.

Maybe if the babysitter tries that to get the baby's appetite going, she can get him to take a bottle... If not, at least the baby is eating something!

It could be the surroundings, the noise, the position that the baby is in...
It could be the temperature of the bottle vs the warmness of mom.

My personal guess is that it is a combination of temperature of the milk and position. When mom feeds, the baby is close and laying down. When bottle fed, the baby could be sitting up, cuddled but not close, etc.

I think Mom should change over to ONLY bottle feeding breastmilk. Once he learns from Mom what the new 'normal' is, he will be more open to others offering up meals.

My son pulled the same sort of thing whenever I was in school in the daytime.... Out of sheer cussedness ;)

He wouldnt eat, or just snacked, and slept TONS while I was gone... And then ate and was awake at night.

AND when I had night classes? Switched. Slept while I was gone, awake and eating while I was home.

He would just arrange to be with me.

Took a couple quarters to figure that out.

Tool him about 2 weeks each shift to adjust himself to being 'awake & eating' when it was me.

Since I DID need sleep... I started coming home to nurse between classes. Meant I was gone longer... But since I was 'around' (ish) it kept him on a schedule that allowed me to sleep.

Might not be what's going on with her son, but that's what happened to me!

It might sound strange but it could be the babysitter's body scent. Some babies have a more sensitive nose for smells and the babysitter could be perfectly clean. Is it a perfume that she wears that turns off this kid? There is something not right.

Angles for feeding and bottle temps play a part as well.

I sure hope she finds an answer soon and baby does not suffer from this. Maybe someone else could watch baby in the next couple of weeks if this does not work out.

Good luck to her.

The other S.

I'm a little late to the party, and I didn't read all the responses, so apologies if I'm repeating...

At the la leche league meeting I used to attend with my first, the leader OFTEN (probably at least once a meeting) would say that some babies wouldn't eat during the day at daycare or with a caregiver and then would cluster feed when mom got home. Apparently, it's not normally an issue - mom's body adapts.

Obviously, it's an issue for the baby sitter, and no one wants to think about their child not eating for a whole day and being upset the whole day...

This child may simply struggle with change - even at this early age...

I guess I wasn't really much help anyway... not with the situation with the babysitter, anyway.

1) Not all babies will take a bottle. My breastfed daughter was like that. I tried, ALL kinds of bottles and nipples. She just would not take a bottle of pumped milk from me or anyone else.
But my breastfed son, would take a bottle.

2) If the baby will not take a bottle, he is prone to dehydration. Dehydration in a baby, can come on really fast, and it is dangerous. Know that.
I certainly hope, that she or the Sitter, knows the signs of dehydration.

3) There was a baby that I used to babysit, that was like that and the parents told me that their child ended up in the hospital twice, by that age. For dehydration. And the baby needed an IV.

4) The Mom, needs to try other bottles or nipples, to hopefully find one that her baby will take. Hopefully.

5) HOW is the Sitter, giving the bottle to the baby??? ie: is she holding the baby during feedings, or just propping up the bottle to the baby to drink? A baby that age can't hold the bottle by themselves. A caregiver needs to hold the baby... to feed. And not while lying down... the baby can choke etc.

If the baby, is truly unable to drink from a bottle (some babies do get "nipple confusion"), then it is not the Sitter's fault per say. IF the Sitter is nurturing and really trying... but baby still will not feed... then the Mom needs to try to try something else.
ie: a medicine dropper... can be tried to feed the baby. Or, there are special feeding apparatuses, that can held to feed a baby that is not feeding well. Like a feeding tube etc. Ask a Lactation Specialist... the Mom will need to solve this... or another Sitter will have the same problem.
My friend's baby, had trouble feeding and she went to a Lactation Specialist and the Pediatrician, and she had to use that feeding tube thing... or a medicine dropper.

Or, she needs to get another Sitter.

A baby needs to feed on-demand. And more often per growth-spurts.
You said the baby is already not doing well.
How much longer, can she wait... until her baby is still not doing well?
Can she or her Husband, take time off to find help or to go to a Lactation Specialist to help with the feeding issues?
But again, not all babies will take a bottle.
My daughter, would NOT take any bottle, at all. She would only breastfeed.

First, it's only been four days. Second, it sounds as if she didn't plan ahead to wean him to bottles long enough ahead of time. He has too many changes all at once to deal with. One sign of that is the fact that he doesn't even take the bottle for her at home for a while. He clearly prefers breastfeeding. Since he has both options, he doesn't understand why he doesn't have the choice to breastfeed and refuse the bottle.

Is there any way your friend can visit the babysitter during her lunch break to nurse the baby? At least during the transition. Then she could work her way to giving him bottles. Get him used to taking bottles at the sitter's home so he'll then take the bottles from the sitter.

Or have Dad do the lunch time visits since he'll take bottles from Dad.

My MIL got desperate when she was watching one of my nieces who refused bottles for my SIL. She wouldn't take bottles AT ALL. Not with breastmilk, not with formula, nothing. Then my MIL started to dip the nipple in sugar and she started to take the bottle. But not if my SIL was in the house... the baby could smell her. Not if her daddy was in the house either... she could smell him too. It took months to switch her to a bottle. Even at home, the baby refused a bottle and wanted to nurse, but they had to keep her on a bottle or they had to start all over again. So my BIL had to feed her.

Once she started to consistently take a bottle without fussing or complaint, my SIL was able to feed her with a bottle too but the baby wouldn't take breastmilk in the bottle. It had to be formula.

I wouldn't be so quick to judge the babysitter on this. It's not the sitter's fault.

Tell her to look up "reverse cycling" and how to bottle feed a breastfed baby. Kellymom.com has a lot of good information. The sitter may not know how to feed him (example, how to heat the milk appropriately - not in the microwave, and to what temp - many babies like breastmilk to be really warm) or he may just want momma. I would not add cereal to the bottle, nor would I stop nursing at this point. It's likely a transitional thing.

I would be very concerned if my baby was doing this and I'd stay home to feed him or else get a sitter he would drink for. Maybe she didn't get the baby used to a bottle before she left him at the sitter. It takes time to get a baby adjusted to that if he's breastfed. I hope she gets this taken care of soon for the baby's sake.

Does she give a bottle at home or breast feed exclusively? Babies can be finicky about he kind of bottles and nipples you use. My best results have been with Playtex Nursers... the kind with the drop ins or the plastic liners. There's something about the shape of the nipple that babies like, and you can push the air out of the milk bag so the babies get less air in their bellies. If she's not trying a bottle at home at all, that could be the problem.

If the baby takes a bottle at home, I'd say that he's just having trouble adjusting to the new care situation. A week and a half is a long time for a baby to not eat for someone though... I'm wondering what tricks the childcare provider is trying. I've never had a baby (or any other child) in my care that wouldn't eat anything for me for that long. I day maybe... not a week and a half. May be time for a different care situation.

This happened to a family member of mine. The baby was 4 months old. Her mom kept having to come home from work to nurse, and her boss told her that she would need to quit her job if she couldn't work things out at home. The baby was getting thinner and thinner too. It was very upsetting for everyone.

What finally worked was putting some cereal in the bottle with a larger opening in the nipple (you can buy nipples with larger openings.) The difference in the taste and texture got the baby to actually start taking the bottle. However, she did need to stop nursing. The baby simply wouldn't take both breast and bottle.

I'd try this if I were the babysitter. I know that most people don't like putting cereal in a bottle, but if baby isn't taking one, something has to change. She might also try giving a little rice cereal with a spoon to get him interested in having something in his mouth. Usually the peds want to wait until 6 months to start cereal, but 4 months is okay as long as you are just feeding a little.

I hope this helps. I know she doesn't want to stop nursing, but it's very important that the baby start taking a bottle while she works.

Good luck to her,
Dawn