Afternoon Routine Tips?

D., if you get any info I would really appreciate hearing what you find.
We are raising 3 grandchildren, a 14 year old boy who has been diagnoised with Aspergers, ADHD, and depression. He is on meds, but seems to be worse since a vacation to georgia this summer. Then there is his sister who is 11 and also has ADHD, Aspergers and ODD/Bipolar. She assulted her teacher last year and spent a couple of months is juvie.
Then there is the baby she is 9 and doesn't seem to have the same issues as her siblings. so again anything you find out would be appreciated.
J.
Tyler,Texas

My dd doesn't have the same challenges your young ones do, but did just start kinder this year. It seems like a lot of homework through the week... so I've requested it be sent home on a Friday so we can get a jump start over the weekend. Her homework is usually given on a Monday due the following Friday, so these extra few days have really helped us.

Your 10 and 7 year olds are still in intermediate/elementary and this shouldn't be too much of a burden to ask their teachers for. The 13 year old, in middle school I'm assuming? That might be a bit more of a challenge. With their personal challenges, one of the modifications the teachers should be making is giving your children more time. I'd definitely ask for more time either before or after an assignment is given. But make it a reasonable amount requested - it's hard being a teacher and grading all those assignments, and then to have to go back and grade one separately is challenging too.

A weekly or twice weekly backpack clean out would be good for organization. The amount of paper coming home from school is just crazy. Speaking as a former middle school teacher, I know it's a huge challenge to keep those kiddos organized, and at a time when they really need to be doing it for themselves. But it's your 7 yr. old giving you the biggest worry, and besides a binder with sections or folders for each subject and constantly being on top of it, I don't have many concrete solutions for you.

I hope you get it worked out. I know what it's like to feel you're always on a kid's case, when all you really want to do is enjoy them and love them.

I have a son with sensory Integration disorder that is 7 years old and in 1st grade and a daughter that is 5 in Kindergarten. My son is a VERY slow learner but can remember what he wants to remember. Don't laugh but we are on a very tight schedule down to minutes! My son was in PPCD for 2 years and I really noticed the tighter the schedule the better he was. So with this said here is a standard day...keep in mind things happen so it doesn't always work out this way but I do my best to try to keep it as close as possible.

I wake them up at 6am they get dressed and come down for breakfast. At 6:40 they go brush their teeth and at 6:45 we should be walking out the door waiting on the school bus to come around 6:50.

They both ride the bus home so they usually get home around 3:15. From 3:15 to 3:30 we have snack then from 3:30 to 4 pm we do our School homework that is sent home..this is usually enough time. While they are eating a snack I go through their backpacks and seperate the stuff out and get together whatever the teacher needs etc. We have "our" playtime (crafts, outdoor fun, games) until 5. They have free play/tv time from 5 to 5:30 and then they help set the table for dinner and we have dinner. From 6:15 to 7:15 they have Play time that does not involve TV/video games. At 7:15 they take their bath and then 7:30 to 8:30 we spend that hour going over sight words, practing writing our letters, review for spelling test and reading time for him and then I read a book or 2 to both of them. We say our prayers and are in bed by 8:30. I try to stick to a tight schedule as it really helps my son...my schedule is down to me setting my iphone alarm for each new activity and they know what comes next when they hear the alarm and I can keep better track of what time it is. On Wednesday's it's different as the kids both have activies and we go to church so that is a off night and we do homework during dinner at a restaurant. I felt that chuch is just as important as school work so I let that be a off night!

My son always tells me he is stupid but I know that is not true. I tell him some of us just take longer to learn than others and our learning requires lots of practice and repetitiveness. I found this has been the best schedule that works for us. Hope it helps!

I also do not have kids with the same issues as yours (although my son has sensory integration disorder).

One thing that might help you - instead of picking the kids up and going home and then leaving again at 3:50, can you meet the younger kids at their school, sit down in the cafeteria and start on homework/get home work done...and THEN leave to pick up your oldest at 3:50? You would save a little bit of driving time and you might even get some homework done in that 1/2 hour that they don't have to do later.

Good luck!
L.

I have two sons ages 15 and 11. My oldest is ADHD. Originally when they were younger I had them do their homework when they first got home, before they did anything else. Especially needed my ADHD child to do homework while he was still medicated and in a work mode. That has not really worked for the past few years. My older son's medication (Focalin XR) has mostly worn off by the time he gets home from school, so now they relax and watch TV or play outside and I feed them an early dinner, usually around 5 pm. They are both starving when they get home and my older son does not eat any lunch because of his meds. I give my 15 year old a low dose of Focalin that only lasts about 4 hours with his dinner when he has a demanding homework assignment. (I have to make sure he has eaten dinner, before he takes additional medicine.) So after dinner the TV and computer goes off and both boys do their homework at the same time. Less distractions that way. My biggest problem is when one of them has significantly more work than the other. Sometimes when my older son has a large amount of work to do, then my husband will take the younger son to go do something. This helps to remove any distractions. They may just go for a walk or play outside if the weather is nice or go to the store. Both of them usually read for about 20 minutes before they go to bed to help them settle down.

Hi D..
I don't have any kids with Aspergers or ADD, so I apologize if my answer isn't very helpful. But our afternoons sound a lot like yours. We get home, do homework right away and the kids get help from me. We have dinner 5:30 or 6:00 and the kids help with dishes afterward. They usually start getting ready for bed by about 7:15, which gives them about an hour of down time before starting showers, etc. You might consider pushing their bedtimes a half hour later, if that's workable for your family. It would give you guys just a little more time to hang out together and bond. I hope that helps!

Hi D.,

I work with moms whos kids have similar issues, I will be happy to connect you with one or two if you would like.

You sure do have your hands full.

God Bless you and your family.

A.

What works for me is after we get home at 3:30 I give my daugher(8yrs old) 30 mins of downtime to watch TV or play a game on the computer or play w/her little brother. Then at 4pm she comes into the kitchen to do homework while I start on dinner. That way I am right there to help her w/homework and help keep her focused on it. During those 30 mins that she is watching TV I put my 1yr old in his high chair to give him a snack. While he is eating I sit there and look through her folder and review her graded papers to see how her work is, and sign whatever needs signing. Usually she is done w/homework by 5pm. So she gets to play in her room until dinner or i give her some chores to do. At six dad gets home and he usually takes the kids outside to play for 15 mins or so while I get dinner on the table. We eat and she helps clear table and does dishes(not everyday tho) Then she gets 30 mins to 1 hr more of TV/Computer or we'll play a board game or card game with her. At 8pm she does her daily reading in bed in her room to wind her down for bed. And lights out at 8:30. Showers are usually in the mornings! THat is our routine!

This is a tip more for your 13 year old. For my son we use a large Binder (last year we used one made by Case It, this year it is made by Mead) The binder has a zipper close and has a file folder built in. We then have a folder in the three ring for every class labled. It makes it easyer for him to find his work in class. We also have a calender with due dates on the frount it only has the current month on it so not to overwhelm him.
Another suggestion is can your have your older one come home on a bus or have some one to pick him up it would save time for you. If that would work you could have a snack ready when he came home and then time for homework. My children need a little break before home work and a little snack.