2 Yr Old in a "Big Boy Bed" and Doesn't Want Us to Leave Him

Poor little guy. This is a HUGE adjustment for him. The place where he slept for 2 years, which was safe and familiar, is now scary (to him)!

We put our son in a toddler bed at 18 months because he was able to climb out of his crib! We went through an adjustment period and I said the same exact things you are saying now - Did we do this too early, will he ever sleep on his own again! Trust me, this too shall pass.

It took him about 4 nights to really be OK with it. Those 4 nights were terrible, for us the falling asleep part wasn't too bad - it was the staying asleep part that was hard. He would wake up and get out of bed and be standing in the middle of his room in this twilight-like state screaming hysterically.

We tried to make it really fun. Make him feel like a big boy and that it was a huge deal to be sleeping in a big boy bed. For the first 2 nights, I stayed in there with him until he was OK, not until he was sleeping, but until he wouldn't cry when I left. I just couldn't let him be in there screaming his face off all alone - I knew he was just scared! And I went in immediately when he woke up at night because he was literally hysterical. It honestly only took 4 nights for him to get comfortable enough with it to fall asleep and stay asleep w/o any issues.

I should probably mention that we had a fantastic bedtime routine before the transition, so all he had to get used to was the new bed.

Good luck!!!

I had the same problem with my 2 1/2 yr old daughter. Now I lay down with her about 1/2 hr before her bed time to read a few books of her choice, then after we're done with her books I read her the "good morning, good night" book. She'll say good night to me after that and I tell her that I'll be back to check on her.
The first week or so when I did this she would cry as soon as closed the door. I made sure that I went back in every time she cried, and every time I went back in I would assure her that I would always came back in for her whenever she needed me.
After about a week she stopped calling for me. It was a VERY long week, but worth it =D

The same thing with my daughter. We switched her a couple of months before she turned 2. She went to sleep fine in her crib and then after the switch she would get out and run to the door and bang on it and scream like a lunatic. So we slept with her for a couple of nightsand then I'd had enough. We had just gotten our three year old son to sleep alone in his bet and I couldn't stand the thought of starting a bad habit with my daughter. We let her cry it out, it took ten minutes. Totally worth it. She gives a hard time every once in a while but is generally okay. But once you decide to go for it, you can't give in or he will learn he can manipulated you and then it will be a lot harder.

maybe you should keep the twin bed maybe go to a thrift store and get toddler bed. that way you don't take the hit of buying a new one and you that way he can be out of the crib and when he;s ready he can transition himself to the big bed when he's ready. then just save the toddler bed if you plan on having more children or donate it back or give it to someone else who has a small child. just a suggestion.

So here is what you do and believe me it works! So he needs time to transition to his new bed. First just sit right next to him on the bed until he falls asleep (like what your hubby has already started doing) if he does fine with this then the next night instead of sitting right by his head you sit at the end of the bed by his feet. You may have to do this for a few nights to a week or until he is used to falling asleep with you at the other end of his bed. Then you start just standing in his room like half way between his bed and the door. After he is fine with that then you stand right at his door until he falls asleep. And finally once he is fine with that you just put him in bed and walk out of the room completely. Also when you do this you need to try to not talk or make a lot of eye contact because you are training him to not need you in his room. I gave this advice to another mom on here once and about 2 days later she sent me a personal message thanking me because it was working for her son. So good luck.

D.,
It Truly doesn't last forever. Patience with a child's vision of what things are will pay off in the future.

I don't know what you did for bedtime before - bedsharing, co-sleeping or crib, or whatever. I'd go back to that, and let HIM decide when he is going to sleep in his 'big boy' bed. (I steer away from 'big boy' anything at this point - even though EVERYONE else uses it. A potty is a potty, I don't intend to clap if he uses it. No one claps for me! : ) Same for dressing and sleeping and anythign else that really is just 'grown up' stuff.)

Try Attachment Parenting. org They have not only a lot of ideas but possible solutions for you.

My son is 2.5. He is NOWHERE near ready to separate. Some days he even gets into his 'bed' we have, and pretends to sleep there on his own. Nap or nightfall, he's with us. Quite frankly, it's quieter, nevermind better for his self-esteem.

More ideas, can email me,
Good luck,
M.

PS: I don't know when I have received an email/question directly. I try to check on a regular basis, but if you haven't heard back from me, I think it's the system. I haven't ignored an email yet!

D.,
The hardest time for me was with my oldest, a couple of months before his brother was born he was 18 months and we got him a toddler's bed because he was going to be a big brother and the baby needed the bed! :)
But at the beginning it was hard, my husband would go lay down with him (I mean next to him on the floor) until he fell asleep. He would come over to our bed in the middle of the night and we would get up and take him back, lay down with him again until he would go back to sleep. I also got him a night light, that seemed to help a lot. You just need to be consistent, and don't give in. You can laydown with him and when he is out just go to your room. I honestly don't remember how long we did that for (it was almost 10 years ago) but it worked! Sometimes we would wake up to find him at the feet of the bed :) and we didn't even hear him of felt when he got in there :)
But in all, you will see that he will get there; just be patient with him.
One thing I would suggest is to do the reading on his bed rather than the chair, that also helped us a lot. We did the reading, a night light and a prayer before going to sleep, but he was already in the bed tucked in.
Hope this helps.
Blessings

When my daughter was 27 months we moved her to a bed. Big mistake, she wasn't ready. She is now back in the crib and feels safe. So, we are sleeping again. I learned not to rush her, there is no hurry for a bed. We needed the crib for our son, but we just got her a crib that is convertible into a bed.

Good luck!

We had this problem too - DS turns 2 next month - and we decided to leave him in his crib. I've been torturing myself over this transition for months becuase I knew it wouldn't go smoothly. Everytime we tried, he would scream when we left the room. I tried staying there with him until he fell asleep, but he never did. He's not used to having us (or anyone) in his room with him when he sleeps, so that wasn't working. He'd just lay there for 30 minutes or so then start playing. And I just couldn't lock him in there and let him cry. I'm very comfortable with CIO, but not when I know he's scared.

So, I took that as my message that he's not ready and gave up. He's back in his crib where he sleeps soundly. Our challenge is that he climbs out of cribs everywhere but at home. So now we have to figure out what to do when it comes to overnights at grandmas...but that's another story.

We have another baby coming in August, and we just wound up getting another crib for her.