Worried About My 5 Year Old Becomming Overweight

D., every female in my family struggled with weight as well. At the age of 4 I was as big as an 8 year old(hight and weight)My parents tried limiting my food, but I was always hungry so I would sneak food out. Looking back I wish my parents would do it defferently.To be overweight /skinny is in the geans.I have friends who can eat all day long, and are skinny as could be.
I am too worried that our boys got my "fat geans" (they have always been 97% or off the charts for both height and weight)
I do not put our kids on the diet or limit their food, they eat when they're hungry. But the foods that they do eat is what makes the difference and us modeling healthy eating.We get fat free milk for the family(our 16 months old still gets whole milk though), whole grains, low fat/fat free yogurts, veggies, fruits. We DO NOT keep junk food in the house. I always read the labels, since even stuff like apple sause, canned fruits, ketchup , penut butter and lots of other stuff has corn syrup and sugars in it. There are a lot of healthy options out there, and yes they are not cheap.....but for us it is worth it(I never want my kids to go through what I went through).In the begining of this year we had to stay with my inlaws for 2 months and our kids were eating candy, chips, cookies, hot dogs and stuff like that just because that's how my husband's parents eat......after just 1 months i could not button our 3 year olds pants (and they were way too big before that).We have been back on our healthy eating for 3 months now and now he needs a belt:)
Phisical activity is important too. We go for long walks, ride bikes, swim,play at the park, run(free activities:)) Maybe dance or gymnastics would be something your daughter would like. However as a child I played every sport that there was and walked a lot(lived in the city), but my daily calorie intake was so big that all that did not matter :(
When we're out somewhere where other kids are eating gold fish, cookie, chips, ice cream our kids are allowed to have that.....rare times will not hurt(we had friends who's child was not allowed anyhting like that so every time he would be out at somebody's house he'd sneak lots of junk food out and eat it in the bathroom).
If our kids what something "sweet" at the house we get organic Luna bars , they tast like brownies and have lots of good stuff in it and no refined sugars/preservatives.
My 2 cents:)

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I have a son that has always been bigger then the norm..not over weight..just bigger..taller..all around.I have never restricted his intake of the 'good' food just the bad junk food and made sure he got exercise.Make sure you have good snacking food..fruits/veggies/crackers what ever she will eat.As long as its not the junk food stuff.I wouldnt worry to much.Make sure your family has these on hand as well and dont restricted her..thats the key.

Now I have a 17yr old football player type son.

PS-Noticed you called your second child a 'princess' I hope you dont do that in front of the 4yr old.She might be getting the wrong impression and over eating to compisate for the love that mommy & daddy are giving to the new baby since she no longer is getting all the attention..think about it and good luck..
S. B

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D.,

The only advice that I would give is that whatever you decide is best for your daughter, you should also implement for the entire family whether it seems necessary or not. If she notices that she gets smaller portions or doesn't get treats and everyone else does, she may start to think she doesn't deserve to eat like everyone else and I think that it can lead to major self-esteem issues. I have a good friend who has been overweight her whole life and she still remembers very clearly that when she was 7 years old, her mom started to serve her less food than her brother was served and told her it was because the doctor said she needed to lose weight. Her brother did not have the same weight problem that she did and she could not understand why she was being treated differently and she felt like she had been bad and was being punished when in fact, she had done nothing wrong.

I am sorry that you are having to deal with this issue because it is probably a very hard issue to tackle but I just believe that it should be the entire family who makes changes rather than just your little girl. I think that she needs to feel supported by her family and to learn good habits at this age. Good Luck!!!

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Keep healthy snacks in your house and cook healthy meals. Your daughter is old enough to where she should be eating what everyone else is eating. In our house we have only wheat bread products, we eat turkey sausage if we eat sausage, and we make turkey hamburgers instead of regular burgers. We eat carrots and celery with a little fat free ranch dip or hummus and fruit as snacks. The only food left out for our daughter to see is the fruit bowl so when she is hungry she asks for fruit not junk. Sugar free Jello is a great "sweet" snack and kids think they are getting a real treat, also we eat carmel rice cakes 70 cal for 7 cakes lots of snack for so little cals.

I would suggest keeping her active in some sort of physical activity, make sure you get out and run around outside in the yard for 30 mins a day, maybe if you can make time and do some "Mommy and me" yoga she will also love the time with Mommy. Whatever you do make sure you express to her how exercise and being active our good for your body and make you feel good!

Also you most likely want to keep all caretakers (grandparents, friends, nannies) in the loop on what changes you are trying to make and what you expect from them to help you maintain her eating. I know when my daughter goes to her grandmother's house it is cotton candy and cakes Ihave made sure she knows where to draw the line between giving her a treat and stuffing her full of crap!

I hope all works out for you.

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Whatever you do, don't you or anyone else ever tell her that she's going to get fat. I am a 35 year old mother who suffered from an eating disorder all through my teen years and into my 20's. Don't allow her to be teased about eating too much, but teach her about healthy choices and portions for her body. Explain to her that if she's hungry she should eat smaller, more frequent meals (you ofcourse should help her with this). Also make sure that you engage her in physical activity and explain the benefits of a healthy heart. You need to be her role model, so make sure you practice what you preach and she will follow. Don't worry so much about her weight, focus on her health and how she feels about herself. If you change this now, you will be giving her the greatest gift to grow up with and that's healthy self esteem and a positive body image!! I didn't have these things growing up and I had to go through a lot of pain and suffering.

Good luck,
K.

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That's a tough one. My 2 daughters are built completely different. One is thin as a rail (7 yrs old), and the other was born with hips (and she's only 5). My 5 eats way less than my 7; she's just built more like me! I struggled with eating issues, using food as comfort, starting when I was about 9. My mom used to try to get me out to exercise, but what I really needed was love and attention and probably to see a therapist. It took me a long time to get over equating food with comfort. As young as she is, it wouldn't hurt to take her to someone, even for just an evaluation. The WORST thing to do is tell her she's fat or be judgmental of her (which it doesn't seem like you'd do anyway). Just makes it worse. Although really, a size 6 for a 5 year old isn't too much bigger than "normal," whatever that is. Oh, and one more thing- sometimes it's difficult for some people to tell the difference between hunger and thirst. I can't, so instead of eating right away when I'm hungry, I drink a glass of water to see if maybe I'm just thirsty. Good luck!

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All the women in my family struggle with weight. My mom is a dietician and this is what she did and it worked for us. My mom only bought healthy food--lean meat, vegggies, fruits. She never bought junk food or junk food drinks. If it is not in the house your kids can't eat it. I thought that fruit was a dessert until I went to college.

Second, I would suggest taking your daughter to see a therapist who is good with food addiction issues. She is young to be having food issues. Talk to your pediatrician, your local mental health center, or Child Advocacy Center and get the names of three good therapists. Then check them out without your daughter around. Figure out which one you think would work for your child and schedule an appointment.

I would also encourage you to consider getting her involved in sports or another form of exercise. My sons played soccer, basketball and baseball at that age. My daughter plays volleyball and takes a walk with me a couple of times a week. A little exercise doesn't hurt any of us! :o)

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Hi D.,

My parents struggled with their weight mostly all their lives, especially my dad, who was fat as a child and adult. When we were children, Mother didn't want the same for us, so she put only healthy food in the frig (my dad would just go out to sneak the sweets and foods he shouldn't have). As children we were very small-sized, but it wasn't because she kept food from us - we didn't start having weight issues until we were grown. If there had been chips and cookies and ice cream or high fat foods in the frig, we would have started gaining weight a lot faster.

Fast forward to 14 years after I was born, child #4 came along as a surprise in the family. From the get-go my sister had a different metabolism from the rest of us. She was bigger and had a much larger appetite. She was also more aggressive as a child than us with a far different temperment. She hid food in her room, snuck off to the corner store to buy junk and candy whenever she had a little money, and put on weight early in her life. She struggles tremendously, even today, with her weight. My mom never knew what to do about it except offer healthy foods. Still, it didn't work.

You could try going for food counseling yourself if there is a children's hospital anywhere close to where you live, and talk to them to see what you can do to help your child. They might want to work with her, or perhaps could just give you advice. It would be nice if there is something they could do to help, but in absence of that, you may have to resign yourself to the fact that she will have to deal with this problem on her own in the long term. Just keep only healthy and lower fat foods available in your house, and enlist your mom's help in not filling the refrigerator before you visit.

Maybe someone else will have better advice. Unfortunately, my family has seen the same behavior with my sister and my dad, and never got it under control.

All my best,
D.

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I am by no means an expert, only have an opinion. My family doesn't have a history like you were saying yours does but this is something I've worried about with my daughter (2yrs) since she started on solids. I just don't want her not to have a chance because I was over feeding her or feeding her unhealthy things. We do three meals and two snacks a day. Mostly healthy items. That should be enough to fill anyone for the day adjusting portions according to age. I find that when my daughter wants a snack other than those times that it is more because she is bored than she is hungry. I find that if I can get her distracted doing something, playing with puzzles, painting, going outside, etc. that she no longer wants the snack. I think as long as they are snacking on healthy items that it isn't really that big of a deal as long as they are also getting excercise. I just want to impress on my daughter that exercising isn't just a fad or something that you should do. I want her to know that it is fun and a way of life. I hope a helped with something. Good luck.

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you can get fridge locks that you put on the side or the top (depending on the fridge you have) you can get them anywhere but babies r us always has them... if you dont have one near you try walmart target ect. and if she does figure it out... try keeping only healthy foods around. i know at 5 shes not going to the store any paying for the food so you need to be the adult and make sure shes only getting things that are good for her. talk to her doctor about teaming up with a nutritionist. good luck

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Though I've never had a weight problem, my mother has, and I've heard her speak of her overweight childhood a lot over the years. She was over 80 pounds in 1st grade....very tall, but that's still a ridiculous weight for a 6 year old. I think she blames it mostly on the fact that she had no limits with food as a child. She also lived in a household that had lots of fatty snack foods and heavy, comfort foods at meal time. I wouldn't every use the word "diet" around your daughter, b/c you don't want to give her a complex, but without her knowing what you're doing, you might want to totally redo the way your family functions with food. Let the entire family know the new boundaries and that you're all going to start eating healthy. You might also try to get her (and the rest of the family so she doesn't feel singled out) on an exercise regiment. Maybe you guys could all walk the neighborhood each night. Good luck!

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I have two wonderful kids books about making healthy food choices. My kids like both of them and I like that they are learning good habits now.

The first is; "Eat Healthy, Feel Great"
http://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Feel-Great-William-Sears/dp...

The second is; "The Race Against Junk Food (Adventures in Good Nutrition)" http://www.amazon.com/Race-Against-Junk-Adventures-Nutrit...

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Don't know if I can help or not but, my son is 4 will be 5 in September and he weighs 53lbs himself he is tall and is bigger all around than most 5 year olds. I just bought him yesterday size 7 shorts. He can wear some smaller but, he is a thick boy. He is not chubby but, could be very quickly. He likes to eat snacks and cookies and candy and things like that and it used to not bother him but, now it does. My husband and I sat and had a talk with him about nutrition and eating right and staying healthy and just pointing out some factors of being over weight I myself am overweight so it is helpful to say "like mommy" he sees some of the troubles I have and I can explain the troubles in life he does not want and that is just what we did and honestly he wanted me to go to the store and get him fruit right then and this was just the other day and he is doing so much better now and asking me before he eats anything because he wants to know if it is good or not and if it has lots of sugar in it or not. Hope it helped Have a great day

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I agree with previous advice to keep healthy options available and model healthy behavior. I would also add to maintain an active lifestyle as a family. Positive messages as well that if she is hungry it is okay for her to eat and to let you know so you can plan some fun (and healthy) snacks for her to enjoy. This should help with the sneaking. Also, have her drink a glass of water often as she may be thristy not hungry. I would also rec. a complete physical if you continue to have concerns that include blood work to make sure there is nothing medically going on. Lastly, make sure that your parents and others that she might spend a lot of time with are using the same techniques and providing the same messages as you do in your home whenever possible.

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Not only can you lead by example and have only healthy snacks, you can also have her help prepare/watch prepare them. I keep my 2y/o snacks where he can see them. Fruit and veggies in the fridge, or in a fruit bowl, and he picks something out and likes to watch me cut it, and then share or i make pre sliced baggies to choose from. I also keep a dry food snack basket with 100 calorie packs, low cal/high protein granola bars etc. I am also pretty picky about when he can have them, no snacks before meals, even if it causes a fit, and snacks at the table only (unless its special). He only gets cookies/chips etc when we are out for a special treat. Remember you do the shopping, preparing, and frequency of meals/snacks. It is easy to give in to "I want", but in the end we are the mommies, and we decide. For an extra sweet tooth, try frozen bananas dipped in fat free chocolate, or angel food cake with fat free whipped cream and fresh strawberries..2 of our favs.

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Get her involved in menu planning. Plan out menus and snacks for the entire week. Then make sure she is eating something healty every 2 hours or so (carrots or celery with peanut butter). If you ever look at all diets that work, you eat a lot of small portions of healthy stuff.
If she makes the decisions she will feel a part of this process and be proud when she cooks or makes her snack/meal. Also be careful about the image issues. 5 is a really critical age and you don't want her to grow up worried about weight. There is enough about that in the media as it is. Just stay healthy. That is what matters the most! Good luck.

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Sneaking into the refrig eating out of a container with her hands sounds like an eating disorder to me. I would see a psychologist about it along with my dr and tell them that story.
Also, sometimes the more you eat the more you want. Exercise, after you exercise on a regular basis, will make you less hungry. Drinking alot of water instead of eating will help fill that hunger void. Also, it could very well be that her body is needing something, making her crave food. Give her a vitamin to ensure that she is getting all of the nutrients and vitamins that she needs and that may help that hunger craving. Have a talk with her and explain to her about the weight problem in the family and as for her help in controlling this problem
Good luck!

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I would definitly LOCK the fridge. YOu can get one of those locks that looks like a pretzel in the baby department. She shouldn't have the dexterity to open it at her age (its hard for me!) I also tell my kids no sneaking food. If you sneak food you get nothing else the rest of the day-ony dinner. All my kids have to do is ask and I will give them a snack! Also get rid of any junk food and empty calorie items in your house it will be easier to avoid them if they are not there and subsititute them with healtier options-veggies and dip, fresh fruit, let her help you make jello with fruit in it, cheese, etc. I would also ask your pediatrician for a referal to the dietician. They should be able to help you! (if you are working in the hospital, see if you can talk to them there for a diet plan.) Try talking to the dietician without your daughter present. I agree don't make food an issue with here but make her understand that we have to make healthy food choices. Remember she learns from watching her loved ones around her! My daughter is 5 and loves salad since she was a year old. Same for my other 2. They eat their veggies. I don't give them anything else but what we, the parents, eat. They are not allowed to say "yuck" they have to try one bite of each thing on their plate if they don't like it nothing else is said about it. Do get the referal for the dietician!!

Oh yeah, get her into sports or karate or dance-something to occupy her time better and burn off calories!

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lena has it right. dont tell her she can not eat if she is hungry, just make sure that the foods that are available to choose from are all healthy options. fruits and vegetables, whole grain bread and low fat or fat free dairy. high fructose corn syrup is the worst thing in the world for your babies, and it is in so much. ketchup and processed foods are the worst. i only get unsweetened apple sauce, which is still sweet, and never buy snack cakes, pop tarts or frozen breakfast items. monitor what she is eating, and not how often. that will help her develop healthy eating habits.

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The best advice that I can give you is to have set meal and snack times. I know that my kids have breakfast at 7:00, snack at 9:30, Lunch at 12:00, snack at 3:00, and dinner at 6:30. This allows them to be satified with smaller portions. Also make shure the meal and snack choses are healthy. (carrots, yogart, cheese crakers, peanutbutter and crakers, apples, ornges are some of the things that my kids have for snacks.) I do let them splerge about once a mounth and have some type of "junk food" but still try and avoid anything really high in suggar and fat. Also talk to your daughter about what she likes to eat and find some good foods together at first my kids did not want to eat the good stuff, so I have them help me make their snacks.
I Have the bigest problem when the kids go to my inlaws house, because they let them have what ever they want when they want (coke and candybars for breakfast) and when they come home it is like pulling teeth to get them to eat right. I know that our schedual and talking to them about heathy food choices has done some good, because my 5 year old daughter now ask her grandmother for water rather than cokes.
I also encurage my kids to make sure that they get enuff exercise. We play games that have them do push-ups, situps, and we encurge them to run and play outside.
I have struggled with weight all my life and this is what my husband and I came up with to try and help our kids learn to beat the weight problems early. and hopefuly avoid all the struggles that I have had.
I hope this helps.

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What you described about her eating from the container is not only disturbing but gross. Where did she learn this behavior? I'm glad you see that she has a problem and are looking for help. Is she an emotional eater? Does she eat because she's sad/mad/happy? Or is it that she is filling up on empty calories during the day and lacking proper protein and fiber? It would benefit you and your family to contact a dietician or search for a local health class and get some materials on what a healthy diet looks like. You can start at home by working together to read labels, learn the portions and measure them out together. This way she gets involved in making good decisions for herself. And avoid eating fast food for a while; it does absolutely nothing for proper table manners. On another note, go outside and get some fresh air and enjoy playing and being a kid all over again with both of your girls. They'll love it and I'm sure you will too!

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Don't make food an issue. Just keep her activity level up. I have a 5 yr old as well and she goes thru spurts where she eats constantly. I have been told children will eat alot during a growth spurt. At 5 you can start your girl in tee-ball,or/and sign her up for a swim class. Don't stress out too much yet.

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my daughter has prader syndrome and they start out as a falure to thrive baby then as they get older they become over weight and you have to moniter intake otherwise they get into obesity becouse they are always hungry at one point we had to put locks on our fridge to keep her out but they dont understand the health issues only that they are hungry so you might just make sure she has her normal meals and keep things like celery,and carrot sticks for quick snacks,or keep salids that she can eat if shes hungry but no snack foods or candy for easy access.and you can buy salid dressing that are fat free,low fat mayo,and cottage cheese and those items are ok for the whole family.
limit fats and she should be fine.good luck no one wants there child to be hungry but you are the parent and you have to moniter for good health.and dont allow her to eat then go to bed she needs to use those caleries or they turn into fat cells.

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Hi, I have 4 children 15,5,2 1/2, and 1 1/2 and they are all built differently. My 5 year old wears a size 8 and weighs 58 lbs. She is a lot taller and bigger than most of the kids in her preschool. When I spoke to her Doctor about it he said every child is different and grows differently,"Not all people are meant to be a size 2." My daughter is very active, non-stop movement or playing and she is still large. Meanwhile my 1 1/2 year old is only 24 lbs and is still wearing 12 month clothes. So, before putting her on a diet or locking her out of the frige, just keep that in mind. Every child is different in the way they grow.

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Alot has been said here, good advice.... just wanted to add the basics for keeping your kids healthy and happy (for life): 1) self esteem - kids always adopt the parents self esteem and habits involving self esteem, so be a good model, 2) only give healthy choices (don't give up, they need to be exposed multiple times to actually start liking and eating, 3) don't deprive, have scheduled snacks between meals (healthy only), so they're never 'starving' and 4) implement a form of excersise for them that doesn't feel like work... a sport they enjoy for example. All of this will establish good eating habits for life, not just while you can control it! Good luck...

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D.,
i'm having the same problem with my three year old daughter. She's very active and loves to dance, but unforutanely she has inherited her mother's build. I've struggled with weight issue for most of my 38 years. My daughter doesn't eat much, but in jan o8, my sister started babysitting for me and eventhough i pack her lunch,and snacks, my sister gives her junk food, i've asked her not to give her anything other than what i send. She agreed, but i suspect that she sneaks some high calorie sweets to her. I do not want my daughter struggling with weight issues. She only eats healthy foods at home. She may have a happy meal at special ocassions. She's never had a soda. I've just enrolled her in dance classes. I hope that this helps her slim down. I think that the best advice is to treat your daugther as an individual and not like you or any other overweight child that you see. I never call my daugther fat or chubby and i don't allow anyone else too. It's not an affectionate term. My daughter thinks that she's a princesses and no matter what size or age, she will always be mommy's princesses.

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