What Would You Say? - Longmont,CO

I don't think you should take her comments personally. It's a reflection of her feelings and where she is at this point in her life - not a criticism of you. I often think and say that I am glad I am passed the infant/toddler ages, as I don't think I would have the energy to do the baby stage again. I love babies, and I admire moms of young ones as I know first hand the hard work, time and effort it takes to be a good mother. Again, don't take it as a criticism, she was just voicing her thoughts that she is glad she is past that stage in her life.

Sorry you took it the wrong way. Most people have a favorite age, if you will, and for some the baby stage is not it. She may be one of those that likes kids and doesn't particularly care for the infant stage of diapering, feeding and napping and much prefers when the kids get older and are a little more interactive. She's just expressing it and most likely didn't mean anything by it. Let it go.

I'd blow it off, sounds like she might be jealous? Either way doesn't sound like she's much of a friend.

Maybe she had a bad experience at this age. Don't take it to heart. If you are enjoying the age, enjoy it. Sometimes I think we "read" too much in comments that other people make and dwelling on them only makes your life miserable, not theirs. Let it roll off and love the time you have with your kids no matter what the age. I think we will have a stage in our kids lives which we will be glad they are out of.

Okay, some people will think I am ba for this. But I might have said the same thing. It is nothing against you or your child. It is me. I don't like the stages between newborn and 2. The dependence annoys me. I hate the fact that something as simple as loading the dishwasher could take all day. Yeah, there are some wonderful moments about it, wlking, rolling, crawling, etc. The inability to communicate stresses me out. I really hate diapers, spit up, sleep less nights. I don't sleep well as it is, a baby just akes it worse. Then due to the lack of sleep I becomemore stressed out. I love the fact that my kids are a little more independent. It doesn't stress me out as much. It isn't that I hate my kids, I just am not fond of that stage. I would love it if a stork would drop the kids off somewhere between 2 and 3. Don't take it personally, she is just probably more like me.

I think some people just don't like that baby stage or maybe her's was really rough and that's why she doesn't miss it, she could have a million reasons for saying that. Either way, I think you handled it appropriately. I'm sure she didn't intend for it rudely, just stating a fact that she doesn't miss that stage in a baby's life.

W.,
Honestly I think you are reading into it to much. As a monther of a 21/2 you and a 16 month old. I total know how she feels and have made the comment my self. I honestly don't miss having to carry my kids around all the time or try to entertain them all day long when there are other things in the house to get done. They now play together and we can play together instead of one wanting to play at the park but the other one having a tough time crawling in the wood chips. It isn't anything towards you and she probably does miss parts of that stage like when they are small and fall asleep in your arms. But just like her that doesn't mean I want to do it all over again. Two is enough for me and I love the stages they are at and do not miss them being so needy, that might sound bad to you but to each there own. I have made the comment to my sister inlaw who has a 5 month old and normally we laugh about it because she has a 5 yo and also understands what I am feeling. Don't be offended she was just speaking her mind not trying to hurt you.

N.

You did fine. For some reason some moms just hate the ages under one as kids are so much more dependent and unable to communicate. Personally I miss that age so much! It is her problem, not yours. I said something to someone the other day about missing the newborn stage and she said "NO WAY, I hated that stage"...so it varies!! You said the right thing!

I "second" all the other responses! I wouldn't worry much about it, your response was appropriate. She probably didn't mean anything personally toward you with that comment. Some days (and for some people) parenting feels more challenging than others!

My sister says the same thing all the time. What she means is the sticky hands, messy faces that are wiped on her shirt instead of a napkin, in and out of car seats all the time, waking up at night. It wasn't meant to be rude, she was just commenting on the fact htat she doesn't miss being so tied down.

To be honest I think you need to chill out... I am in the middle of "that stage" and it is hard! Not everyone has an easy baby or an easy time adjusting.
Although I love my daughter with all my heart, "this stage" of her life has been difficult and I will look forward to when she is a bit older and doesn't cry all day and can tell me her needs.
I plan on having more children for all they offer to me and my husband and our family, but I can't say I am looking forward to the early months and all the challenges they will throw our way.
So really I think you need to calm down and realize that your friend was just expressing how she felt. Be more understanding and not so judgmental...

W. - I wouldn't stress over it or even give it any thought. I'm sure it wasn't meant personal to you it's just she's glad to be done with that stage. I bet afterwards she realized that she shouldn't have said it. There have been times when I have said things that looking back should have been filtered, but she honestly, probably is thankful that she is done with that stage. I have a 13 month old and while he is so easy and we are so blessed I'm looking forward to the days when we can take both of our precious little ones and we can go do things and not worry about naps, leaving someone out because they are too little, etc. Have a great day!

I think what you said was fine. I'm wondering, though, could it be that she has the baby itch and is trying to talk herself out of it? It might actually be a hard time for her, especially if she wants one and her husband is saying no. Before assuming it was a judgmental thing, you might talk to her and see what she meant by it. She might be considering you and good friend and was just thinking out loud.

When will people ever stop making inapproprate comments? I have gotten my share. I think you did a great job with your response. I like to respond in a way that basically says, "I wouldn't have it any other way." For instance when I was pregnant with my third and my older two were 4 and almost 2, a stranger said to me, "You must be Catholic!" (I'm Jewish) I gave her a huge smile and said, "No, just very very lucky" It's comments like those that remind me how much I love being a mom because I know how wrong these people are.

Hi W.,
Everyone has their own experience. Next time you could just say, "Oh, you didn't like the baby stage?" It is okay if you are loving your child at that age just as it is okay if she had a hard time then. It probably wasn't the nicest thing to say to you at a chance meeting but don't let it throw you.
Take care,
B.

You're a good Mom! You're treasuring what you know will soon pass. EVERY age is challenging, just in different ways. You can look at the "challenge" as a blessing or a curse ... an opportunity or an inconvenience. My youngest will be 12 soon and I still need baby fixes. I think your response was appropriate. I agree with the other comment that this lady is missing something in her life. She has a void somewhere that's she's trying to fill. Keep lovin' on those kids!

L.

Don't worry about it. I am sure it wasn't an insult toward your child. She probably had troubles when her children were that young with sleepless nights, and providing constant attention. I hear those comments from my relatives who have older children all the time. Its not that they don't love babies, its just that they have more free time now because their children are older.

I have a friend who has said such comments to me on a number of occasions and I don't think there is anything to be offended about. Different moms have different 'favorite stages'. For my friend, whose children were 14 mos apart and who with both kids had severe post-partum depression, the first year wasn't all that fun. She also thrives on having a spotless house, which often difficult with little ones. I am sure your friend is happy that you are enjoying this stage with your children, just glad she's not in it herself. Instead of getting defensive when someone has a different opinion than you, maybe asking a probing question such as "Oh really? Was this age difficult for you?" will help you understand better where she is coming from and will let her know you care about her feelings too. Sorry that was a sour experience for you!

Too bad for her that she misses out on those tiny baby smiles while she's "past that stage". Sounds like her filter's broken-the one that's supposed to connect her brain to her mouth. She might have not meant it rudely, just as conversation. Personally I'd have been irked too. I think you said the right thing-you said your piece & defended yourself/your baby.
Since you see her off & on, she's not worth worrying about too much.
congrats on that baby boy!

I wouldn't take it so personally. Some people honestly don't enjoy the baby phase, but love other phases. I am the kind of person who does not get baby hungry when I see someone else's baby. I don't beg to hold other people's babies, and really only hold them when the mom asks me to. I never ask myself. I love holding my own babies and I miss things when they are past those stages. But I am also very glad when they're old enough to go to the toilet on their own, buckle themselves in the car, etc. It's possible that her own babies were extremely challenging and she honestly did not enjoy that phase. There's nothing wrong with that at all.

I wouldn't worry about it. just blow it off. the comment could have been innocent.even if it wasn't, it sounded like you handled it well.

Honestly, I think you should think nothing more of the comment. I am sure she was not meaning to be rude at all. I know there have been plenty of times when friends and relatives have told me they were pregnant, and all I could think was that same comment "I am so glad that isnt me!" And its simply because at that stage of my life, I was way too overwhelmed to think that pregnancy or a new baby would be fun. perhaps it was a stressful and overwhelming part of her life when she had an infant.

Not everyone enjoys the baby age I know my SIL doesn't like them during thier tween years and my sister doesn't like the baby phase. If it wasn't directed at your child in particular then I would just brush it off as her opinion. I personally love the baby phase even if his into everything body can wear me out and it sounds like you to too, however I am sure there is an age you wish you could skip with your princesses too.
I hope that made sense it is way to early for my brain to be functioning beyond whats strictly nessesary.

You know this sounds funny but I would take it that she means the "diaper stage". Keep a positive spin on things when it comes to people saying stupid things about our little sweeties.I have two children and I enjoyed all stages because they only go through them once. Because they grow so fast some times I feel I missed it all.Oh well that's life.
Good luck and enjoy your kids and their growing. They are fun. (Remember boys are different to potty train than girls have hubby help because he knows how.) ENJOY YOUR CHILDREN AND ALL STAGES OF GROWING.

I think you're overthinking it. I think that sometimes in order to make conversation, we say things we don't really mean. And, quite frankly, she really may have been being honest. I have a 13 month old and I adore every second of it, but I have friends who look at me chasing him, etc. and are very relieved that they're past the baby stage. I think that's valid and okay for someone to be glad to be at a stage of parenthood where kids are a little more independent. I'm sure she meant nothing directly about your baby, nor did she mean to offend. Maybe you took it a little too personally.

While her comment was tactless and rude, I would not read more into it than is there. She may have not meant it as a criticism, but just a comment on her own life. Maybe she meant HER kid was not fun at that age. She can be happy that that stage is over with for her. Just take it as her own comment on her own life and get on with yours!

It was just her opinion. I wouldn't take it as anything but her own relief and not having to get up in the middle of the night, the constant care and envolvement it takes to have an infant. The three year old is probably more independent than a baby. I remember the sleepless nights, the constant changes and no sleep. My kids are older. I get to sleep in and they feed themselves breakfast and although I plan on having one more, I still think it's great when they get older. Try not to let it ruin your friendship. Good luck!!!!

I don't think your friend meant to be rude. I think she merely was being a bit too blunt and a bit tactless. I see it as more a case of "too much information," really. Personally I love babies and I love to hold them for a few minutes, but do I want another one? Certainly not. I enjoy them immensely but am glad to hand them back to their mommy.

It sounds to me as if your friend perhaps felt overwhelmed when she was herself taking care of infants. I never felt overwhelmed with my daughter as an infant, but my son was a very difficult baby indeed and I felt overwhelmed most of the time. That's why I decided not to have any more after him.

Just let it go now. Don't mess up a friendship over the honest expression of your friend's perspective on being the mother of an infant.

Some people get to the age that don't feel like dealing with a baby. I was like that after my sixth but now would love to get my hands on a baby. She might have had a tough time of it and needs a little space to desire being around a baby once again.

Don't take it personally. It is her not you.
C. B

I wouldn't get too offended. I'm sure she didn't mean it the way it sounded. She probably just remembers how hard she had it then and glad that she doesn't have the stroller, diapers, etc. anymore. I loved that age, but I feel the same way sometimes when I see parents with so much stuff. Not because I'm saying it's a bad stage, I'm just happy we're in a different stage, eventhough there are challenges no matter how old they are. My daughter is almost 8 and she can get sassy, and sometimes, I wish she was 10 months old again:)

I tryt o keep it siple. "Is that so?" "oh really?" And change the topic or move on. If you move on and excuse yourself each time, right away, she may get the hint. she probably really isn't going to hear your thoughts so she has already made a judgement. and just think, how, sad, she probably had a difficult baby and that is so sad.

Sorry but that totally sounds like something I would say! Not to hurt your feelings but because sometimes we don't think before we speak and I am assuming this is what your friend did. After having 4 babies and now as they are older (6,8,16,20) I see my sister with her baby and think I' glad thats not me. (been there done that) but your right you do think back and say I kind of miss those days, but only for a split second then I realize, now that they are older we are finally sleeping thru the night and can attend a movie and see the WHOLE thing or go to a restaurant and not throw food at the people sitting next to us!!! Life gets a little easier as they get older and I'm sure thats what she was thinking because after all who doesn't think a 10 month old is the cutest thing ever!!! Don't take it personal if you really coinsider her a friend I'm sure the comment was not ill stated.

It sounds to me like she was thinking about her own child - not thinking anything about yours. I might have said something similar to what she said to a friend because I had a real stinker at that age! LOL. I guess I should be more careful that people don't take it the wrong way. I think you handled it well by brushing the comment off, but now you need to let it go. Most likely she didn't mean anything cruel or offensive. I think we need to give each other the benefit of the doubt. I think sometimes we get burnt by a truly mean-spirited person and start to wonder if everyone is really like that inside. I think most of us are just trying to do our best with what we have. If we would be a bit more forgiving of each other for the small things - we'd all feel a lot better! I'm stepping off my soap box now. :) Good luck!

I imagine she would be mortified if she realized her comment upset you as much as it has. I'm sure she was just speaking without thinking, and reminiscing about what she considered a tricky time for her. I would not hold it against her. I think most of us have had an insert foot moment that we wish we could take back. Forgive and move on.

Eeek!! She does need to learn to watch her tongue, but on the other hand, what do we achieve by being so sensitive? We all need to agree to disagree and that others are entitled to their own opinions. Some of my best friends and I have differing opinions on matters and we know and agree to disagree. It's a maturity thing. I will draw the line at things that endanger myself or others.

I've actually heard a lot of moms who are "out of that stage" say that exact same thing, I know I myself have said it to, definately not meaning anything by it at all.
I loved the baby stage and miss my kids being babies, but am also glad that they aren't babies anymore. It becomes nice when they can get themselves into the car, or that you can just run out the door at a moments notice, etc etc. Does that mean I 'hate' the baby stage? Of course not, it just means I've moved on with my kids lives.

Maybe if anything there's a slight sadness that her children are no longer babies, but then glad they've moved beyond the diaper stage, carrying all sorts of stuff around stage (strollers, car seats etc etc.)

I wouldn't sweat it to much, because I don't think she meant anything mean from the commment. It's just nice when you don't have to deal with all the baby hassles anymore.

I am sure that she didn't mean to disrespect you! I am at that same stage in life as her! I have four kids my oldest being 16 and my youngest being 8. I too have said, " I am so glad I am done with that stage"! It just means that I am excited to be at a new time in my life! I look at Mom's now with young ones and I get very tired just watching them. Those are some of the fun years, but like her I am glad to be experiencing something new!

Hi W.,
I wouldn't let it bother me one bit. I would guess she just meant after 3 kids the idea of having to change diapers and go through toddler safety just means a lot of work, nothing negative towards you or your child. Every stage is wonderful and just continues to get better with each child. Enjoy each day with yours and one day you may feel the same way and realize it has no negative meant other than the amount of work is different at that age.
Have fun!
SarahMM

W.,

I think your response was perfect. Just remember different moms do better with different stages. I have a cousin who hated toddler stage. However she is awesome with her pre teens. I on the other hand dread the tween/teen years. Your positive attitude is probably contagious.

M. M.

Just let it slide. That age must have been really hard for her with her kids. I always had people tell me, "it'll get better" whenever I was out in public with my twins. They are just trying to sympathize without realizing sometimes what they say is rude.

Hi - I think what you said was right on.

Sounds like her comment may not have been intended as rude - did you think she was saying something negative about your son, or was she just expressing some of her own negative feelings based on her experience?

I guess I would just say something like "Really? I really enjoy this stage - it's so much fun to watch them learn and grow so fast..." or some other statement about your own positive experience. Too bad for her if she didn't find it enjoyable, but everyone is different.

Maybe she can learn from you that there are great things to be enjoyed about this age.

I would let it go. It appears to me that she was saying it more for herself than for you. I don't know if it was intentional that she hurt your feelings, but the truth is you know you have wonderful children and that is all that matters in the end. Sometimes the best reaction is silence. Many blessings.

It's pretty easy to get defensive with comments like that, especially when directed toward our own kids. I have a 9 month old and LOVE this age! But, not everyone are "baby" people. Chances are she really struggled during that age with her child(ren). I would have probably responded with something like "Really? I'm sorry. Were your kids pretty challenging at this age?" And then just let her talk about it. Maybe she enjoys children the most when they can walk, talk, eat, and go to the bathroom all by themselves. She probably has no idea how rude and insensitive that statement sounded to you who sees your baby as the cutest thing in the world.

I'd say: "My dear Friend, you obviously missed something!"

I am very happy for you
I pity her!

I would not take this personal at all. I ma monther of one. He is 1 year 3 months. I think this all the time, that I am happy he is no longer a infant. In fact I want to have anothr kid, but I am putting it off, just because I do not know if I can handle it again. Don't get me wrong, I loved those times I had with him, but it was also very tuff on me. I was working full time, and then I had to come home and be a full time mom (because my husband worked nights). It was hard getting very little sleep. It exhausted and draine me. I am just happy he is at the stage he is at.

I've got to agree with Felicia on this one. I just visited my sister over the fourth of July with her days-old baby, and I said something similar to her. My husband was hoping my visit with her would put me back in baby mode because he wants to have one more, but I told my sister that it was having the opposite effect on me. I made sure to explain that her baby is completely adorable, and that it's a wonderful experience, but I'm glad I'm not doing the newborn thing right now. (Key words here being "right NOW") My youngest turns 1 on saturday. My sister's is her first, and she's just starting the raising kids process. I've got four, the oldest being just four years old, and it's nice not to have a newborn at the moment. I don't think your friend probably meant anything rude by it. Maybe she's just a little stressed right now, and remembers the work having a baby in the house takes. You can mention it to her if you really think she wasn't being nice about it, but she probably is just at a different stage than you and wasn't intending to be mean.

I would just laugh it off. I really don't think that anything negative or mean was meant by the comment.

hello I too think that comment was rude=( if it bothers you next time you see her just ask why she said that. Maybe she did not mean it to come out that way and it was not ment to be an insult. If it does not bother you that bd I would just let it go. every stage comes with it's challanges but I agree they are only little once and just enjoy it regardless of what anyone else said=)

I say this to my friends who have children of all ages but only when they are venting about them misbehaving so they have never acted offended (which I hope they arent because it isnt meant as anything towards their child). Seeing the child that age may have brought back memories of her own child and the fun and not so fun stages they go through growing up. I'm sure she would feel horrible to know she offended you. If she ever makes a statement like that again I would just say "why would you say that? I think this is a great age because I know they grow up too fast." That would at least let her know you dont agree.

Some people enjoy certain ages more than others. I doubt she meant anything rude towards you or your baby. Just don't ask her to babysit, lol.

I have said that to people before and I would hope they wouldn't take it personally. I did not enjoy the first 8 months at all with my twins and suffered PPD during that time with a lot of anxiety. When I hear a newborn cry, to this day, in evokes anxiety in me that is not pleasant. I personally would not take offense just as I personally respect people who say they LOVE the newborn stage.

I wouldn't take it personally, W.. Sounds like she had a rambunctious little one at ten months old and was reminiscing about it. Your son just happened to remind her of her own experience. I don't see it as being rude at all. You said the right thing. Don't hold it against her. She probably IS glad she's past that stage. Good for her, and good for you! Enjoy your son where he is, and let your friend enjoy hers where he is!

I have never had anyone say that to me before, but I have had people say rude things to me about my child. We named our baby boy an older Greek name. We shorten his name so that people don't look at us funny. However, when some people do hear his name I have got some really rude comments. Like, "poor child, when he gets into kindergarten" "Poor Kid" and the worst (which a lady heard from my mother-in-law), "wow, you must really hate your child for naming him that." I could have been really offended and got really mad, but I just think on things that are true. I love my child very much. He is happy and everyone thinks so. And his name isn't that bad.

However with your friend, I would try to look a little deeper. I think she may not be happy with herself and complaining is a way to get it out. Some people do this to get a response so that they can complain. I would just brush it off and not let it get to you. I know easier said than done though.

i would have just said, "really? why?" or "what stage do you mean?". then after she answered i would have said what i like about the stage he's in. she probably just meant something like she's glad all her kids are finally out of diapers or something like that. i've talked with many women about ages of children they are most comfortable with and i've been surprised at how much it varies. i think your response was good, especially considering how shocked you were by her comment.

That's actually a pretty common reaction. Or at least, it's one I get a lot. Of course, I didn't start having kids till I was in my 30's and I'm only on number 2 now. Most of my friends have kids that are pretty self-sufficient. And while I love having a toddler around, I'm also a little bit jealous. You know - to be able to converse with my child and see him learn on a broader scale. I can't wait for that part of his development.

Like being a grandma or something, you enjoy them while you have them, and when you're past that you enjoy the next stage of your life. Truth is that taking care of little ones can be both insanely rewarding and insanely exhausting. Don't feel bad, just understand that some people handle having toddlers better than others. You'll meet some people who are completely jealous and others who are so thankful it's over. I'm guessing I'll be a little of both when I am "past that stage".

Gosh, I would have just taken it as a comment made by someone who felt overwhelmed.

You know, it's really all in our interpretation. It may have been nothing more than honoring and being thankful for the new stages her children are now in. Perhaps she feels better prepared and comfortable in the stages where the children can communicate their understanding of her messages to them and their needs from her.

To be honest, my heart's first response is to feel a bit sad for her to have missed the JOY of that stage, yet I have to acknowledge my life isn't the same as her, nor are my children the same as her, there may have been some very difficult things that you are not aware of or have forgotten about.

Also, there's the point that she may not be in a mentally/emotionally or physically strong place right now that as a woman, as a mother, one should be to deal with a baby the way a baby needs to be attended to. It very well could be an insight into how she sees HERSELF rather than how she sees babies.

Hope that helps,

Whenever someone says somthing like that to me, I just look at them quizzically and say "excuse me?" almost like you just didn't hear them. That way, if they were just having a stupid moment, they will just mutter something about how stupid they must have sounded, or laugh nervously. If they really did have a problem (Oh, I was suffering so badly from sleep deprivation/post partum depression, etc), you can see that it isn't about you at all, and empathize with them a little, and if they just repeat what they said the first time, then you are 100% sure that they are not someone you want to spend much more time with!

I have seen some of the responses and I agree that you should just let it go and not be offended. She was obviously commenting on her own ability to handle that stage and was not putting you or your child down or anything. I have 7 children and I get comments all the time like "man, I don't know how you do it, I can barely handle my 2 or 3 (or whatever it may be)". Have a nice day!!

I would try really hard not to take it personally or be offended. For some people, babies just aren't their thing. Wow, my first was way hard. Now I have a 10 month old, my third... I would have said, "It's hard sometimes, but this little guy is so great and so amazing and loving, I wouldn't trade right now for anything... hopefully you'll be able to look back on this stage with some good memories too." Sometimes I say stupid things, and I just hope whoever I said them will somehow understand that I didn't intentionally say something hurtful or stupid... I have apologized a few times. Luckily most of the people I have apologized too, said they hadn't taken what I said in a bad way... thank goodness for those generous, good-hearted people. She doesn't have to be your best friend, but how about giving her the benefit of the doubt. Good luck! : )

It would depend on the day, but I'm kind of a smart mouth, so I would probably have said something like...

"Yeah, but I'm dreading getting him to his age (point to 3 year-old)...<laugh>...how did you survive!!!"

OR

"Oh, I'm sorry YOUR kids were so miserable at this age...actually, my son's an angel/so easy/etc!"

I would be examining this "friendship", but it may just be that she had a high maintanance baby and she feels that all babies are like that. I wouldn't take it too personal and she was probably meaning that age in particular, not your son himself...at least I hope not! I think your response was great! Good luck!

S., SAHM of 8 1/2 month old boy

I just brush things like that off. She may have just been having a bad day with her kids and remembering that they were even more demanding when they were young. Everyone has bad days where they are just a little more on edge and stupid things come out of their mouths. Personally I enjoy every stage my children go through. I know some people when their kids are out of a stage they tend to forget and others only remember the bad. She may just be done having kids because she's exhausted. Her kids may have been very hard at that age. Don't think of it as an attack on your child. She is thinking about her kids at that age not about your child. You never know what is really going on in someone's head or in their life. I am sure she didn't mean to be rude.

Don't take it personal. Her children are oviously older than yours. I said that to a friend of mine the other day, now I am worried I may of upset her. What I meant when I said that to my friend was. I enjoyed that stage in my life so much, but now that I am out of that stage, I am glad to move on. Now, I can let my children go outside by themselves, I don't have to carry them around all the time, they are not eating dog food or even putting bugs in their mouths and best of all they are sleeping all night long and I am getting to sleep all night long too. Now I can hold yours and play with your children and enjoy that age with your kids, but it's not a full time job for me, and I am glad that I am out of that full time job, now I can enjoy your kids and worry about mine who are starting school, homework, and god forbid noticing the oppisite sex. On second thought, maybe I do miss that stage. LOL! I have 3 children 1 girl who is going on 9. One boy who is in Kindergarten and is 6 and a 3 year old girl. When my little girl was 1 year old, she caught a toad, and put the whole thing in her mouth and then a couple of seconds later, spit it back out. It's gross, It's a funny memory that I will treasure and tell over and over, but I am glad that at 3 years old, I don't have to worry about her doing it again. And I can actually feel better knowing when my kids are at their grandparents place and playing that they know better not to go out to the Highway. I did actually have to get my son off the highway when he and his cousin who were the same age got out there in a split second. It happened soo fast, and I have worried continually every time they were over there, but now he know's better. have a good day D.

I am sure she didn't mean to offend you. Try not to take it personally. I think a lot of people consider the first year to be the most challenging, especially when their children are older...they look back on the sleepless nights and diapers, and maybe don't recall all the fun parts of having a baby. People have said similar things to me, and I just shrug if off.

I would have responded with all stages certainly have their high points and their challenges don't they. I think you took her comment way to personally. It sounds like she had a tough time when her children were that age and she was looking for a little reinforcement.

W.,

Get over it. You are overreacting. Some people apparently don't enjoy having small children as much as you do.

Linda

I don't think that you should get to offended. I too have passed the baby years. my youngest just turned 5. and although I loved having my babies I am so happy to have them out of the baby stages. My girls are old enough that if I have to runan errand I don't have to pack them all up, they can stay home. I don't have to worry about diapers or feedings or nap time. And my body is mine again, no nursing. I can go out in public and wear white without it being covered in baby food, or whatever. I work out and have a great job, none of witch would be possible with a little baby. So don't take what your friend said to heart. Just realize that you are both at diffrent stages in life. Afterall haven't you ever seen a moom struggling with a teenager and said to yourself "I am so glad I don't have a teenager yet." It's the same thing.

Nothing. I thing she meant the diaper stage.

Hi W., I think you are maybe being a little oversensitive. I do see where you are coming from but if we hang on every word that someone says, even if we know they don't mean to be insulting, we are bound to have our feelings hurt. I think everyone who has a 10-mo-old knows what she means. It is alot of work and things seem to change all the time. I would just let the comment pass and don't give it a second thought.