Toddler Doesn't Want to Go to Sleep on His Own.

So normal! It is so common for kids at this age to want Mommy or Daddy with them as they are falling asleep. It really helps them feel safe and secure. He is not manipulating you at all. He is just letting you know that he needs you to comfort him and reassure him. Nighttime can be very scary. They are learning and growing and their imaginations are growing and when it's quiet and they are alone they can be very frightened.

I know it's exhausting, but it is just so important for you to be there for him. If you do this for him for a few nights or even a couple of weeks, you should be able to gradually leave the room before his is asleep. You can stay with him for a little while and then say, "Mommy needs to go potty, but I'll be right back," or "I'm going to take the clothes out of the dryer, and then I'll come right back." Always come right back. As he gets used to this, you can gradually increase the times. Eventually, he will fall asleep on your own.

Work with him. If he feels safe and knows that you are there for him, he will become more comfortable and learn to fall asleep on his own.

Hang in there, but he really does need you right now.

Hi N.,

Did your son used to go to sleep by himself and recently reverted to wanting you there? Or has this always been the case? In either case, sounds like you can try some "sleep training". Try standing by his bed for just a couple of minutes to get him to settle down (after your usually bedtime routine), then explain that it is time to go to sleep and leave. He will yell and scream for a while, let him do it for 2-3 mins, go back in, let him know he is ok, it is time to sleep, tuck him in and then leave again, this time for 5 min. Keep increasing the intervals between your very short visits back. Eventually he will settle down and learn to fall asleep by himself. It may take a few nights. Be patient. Good luck

I do stay with my son, now 4.5 as he falls asleep. I used to snuggle with him till he fell asleep but wanted to get away from that. One of the moms on this site said she would cuddle and then sit in a chair with her computer as they fell asleep. This inspired me and I do that now. Now that I do that, he falls asleep much faster. Sometimes I have my computer with me and I work on it while he's drifting off. I know he won't want this forever, but I enjoy the time with him.

My 16 month old used to do the same thing and his crib is in the same room as ours. What I do is, put him in there, close the door and leave. I do this every night at the same time. Yes he cry and throw a fit, but not for long. He eventually go to sleep because he know it is night time and we are not comeing back in there. At first he would cry for a long time. But now he may cry for about a minute. This works!

He may just be frightened because it's dark. At least he's not wanting you to pick him up or take him to bed with you! He just needs reassurance that you're there and he's safe. I think you should give it to him as long as he needs it!

Children about this age start wanting to be with you and demanding more sometimes. I would tell him you are there and you will come to bed near him soon and put him down and leave the room. He will adjust in a few nights if you are consistent. Otherwise you are starting a habit that will be hard to break. Tell him you love him and then leave.