Terrible Two's and Threes...

I never ignored it in a public place. I gave a chance to recover from the tantrum and then we went out to the car. If I was shopping in the market with a full cart of groceries, I parked my cart, let someone know I'd be back and out the door we went. It doesn't take too many times of that for a child to learn that it's unacceptable behavior and won't work. I did give choices... you can calm now or we'll go to the car. Do you want to walk or be carried...? I had to put my daughter in a time-out in a store ONE time.

Age three is way worse than 2... hang in there :)

Dr. Sears is an expert in this area and has EXCELLENT advice on public discipline and making situations smoother for situations like this:

http://askdrsears.com/topics/discipline-behavior/botherso...

handling temper tantrums in public:
http://askdrsears.com/topics/discipline-behavior/botherso...

Please, do not ever ignore it again :)

Oh yes, this has happened to me!! My mom and I were at a restaurant for lunch one day with my son (4) and daughter (2.5) and it was fairly busy. A couple people in two separate booths next to us looked like they were having a working lunch. Both were on their phones, so I was extra sensitive to my kids' loud voices and actions. My son was able to get his act together after my redirection, but my daughter was just on a toot that day! I really like Jim Fay's choices, so that is usually how I begin to remedy the situation. I asked her if she would like to sit quietly in the booth or the car? She said booth and got quiet for about 30 seconds. Then she knocked over her drink and was still loud. I gathered up my keys, picked her up and took her to the car. I put her in her car seat and I sat in the front seat. I waited silently for a few minutes to calm down because I was annoyed with her and you can't talk (or shouldn't talk) to children with an emotional voice. Finally, I asked her if she knew why we were in the car. She told me because she was bad. I told her she wasn't bad, but I didn't like her behavior. I asked her what was she doing that I didn't like. She said being loud and not sitting down. I asked if she could sit still, be quiet and eat her food. She said she could, so we went back into the restaurant. She was very well behaved after that and when an elderly couple got up to leave that had been sitting directly behind us ,we apologized for being disruptive. My daughter said she got in trouble for being loud, but the elderly couple said she was doing a great job right then.
Tantrums will happen. The best thing to do is to stay calm with them and even though it seems like every single person is watching you, they aren't. I think people appreciate seeing a parent discipline their child in a positive way if they need to. Kids are kids and this is how they learn. Jim Fay's Love and Logic books have been a lifesaver to me as a parent and teacher. If you are looking for some great discipline strategies, they have great ideas. Go to www.loveandlogic.com for more information. They also have a great facebook page too.
HTH,
A.

Well, me being me, I would not ignore it, because I don't feel other people should have to listen my child carry on and act the fool. I would give him until the count of 3 to calm down before just picking him and hauling him out of there. Usually my daughter would tantrum because she was overtired or hungry so if that was the case, just leaving right there and then was the best option - I could at least then get her something to eat, or get her home for a nap.

I would just pinch my kid on the butt or thigh, and while he continued to scream and cry I would ask him if he wanted another one, and then hold my fingers over the same spot. He calmed down for me pretty quickly after that.

And then I'd hold him, no matter where I was, and start the affirmation once he stopped crying and was ready to listen. I said things like "It'll be ok. Momma is here. You were having a hard time, weren't you? Are you hungry? Do you need a drink?", etc.

okay, these DO NOT always work (lmao at myself here b/c i NEVER know)
-if he's acting a complete fool - i.e. inconsolable, then i leave
-if he's doing his intermittent SCREECH thing at the grocery store, which drives me crazy, i say "one more time & we're going home". haven't had to leave the store for that....YET. lol
-before the sirens completely go off i remind him of what we'll be doing when we get home, i.e. - take a walk, feed our dog, play w/trucks.
-i also tell him "i don't wanna be here anymore than you do (if running an errand) and just hope he gets it, lol. he's almost 3 so he doesn't but still, whatev.
-i have a BIG prob still w/going out to eat. now that...we just eat & leave, no chitty chat or relaxing.
it's something we all struggle with girl. good luck. leaving seems to always be one of the better solutions though :)

I think you're handling it just right. Unless he sometimes will stop the sirens, I would skip the count to 3 and just pick him up and remove him from the store.

If he would stop once he saw you walk away, while staying nearby, then I'd suggest doing that. I agree it's not fair for others to have to hear the screams but if they stop in a short space of time walking away could be less disruptive for everyone.