Single Mom Pregnant W/ #2, Looking for Advice or Friends in My Situation.....

The best advice that I think I ever received was that it will all work out and be okay. Right now, you're overwhelmed; but you'll handle it. As moms, that's what we do. We roll with what life throws at us and we handle it. What everyone here says is true - you'll be busy. I had three children by the time I was 21, all under the age of 4. It was insane. I was not a single mom, so I can't offer you anything there. But, you'll be fine. You'll go crazy at times and people will marvel at how you do it, but you will; and you'll enjoy them.

Good luck to you. I'm in the Waterloo area; feel free to contact me if I can be of any help!

____@____.com

M.

Hi my name is C.. I have a 4 yr old and a 1 year old. I'm a single mom as well. My husband and I decided to divorce about six months ago. It is very scary but it will be ok. I like it I get so much one on one time with my kids. If you ever need someone to talk to my e-mail address is ____@____.com. I would be more than happy to help out any way I can. If you ever want to get together and let the kids play why we talk thats fine too. Good luck.

Hi S.,
Let me tell you alittle bit about me and my situations. I was married very young. I had my first child when I was 19 and second one when I was 20 and got a divorce when I was 21. My children were 17 months apart. It was like having twins because of them only being 17 months apart. As one got out of a stage the other one was going into it. It seemed there was no end to the cycle. They fought constantly. But the upside is beautiful. I had two lovely children, which grew up to be wonderful adults, as most mothers would say. We do what we have to do when we have children. We do the best we can do and hope for the best. I have always put my children first. Now that they are adults I say wow how did I do it? Good luck and if you want to talk more email me at ____@____.com
L.
Missoula MT

Hi S.:

Oh, I totally know what you're going through. The same thing happened to me. It was hard for me because I wasn't ready for a second child, and I certainly wasn't ready to be pregnant by myself either but thank the good Lord I did. My son is now 8 and he is such a little sweetie. I thank God everyday I kept him.
You know what, God will make a way for you to do this even with your little 2 year old. It's going to be hard at times but so well worth it.
I would love to chat with you more sometime. We all need friends and friends that understand what we're going through. I truly understand your situation and so proud of you for wanting to keep the baby.
God bless you!!!

T.
http://tinamccomb.stayinhomeandlovinit.com

Im a nEW mom to the area i am married but im looking for friends. IM THINK YOU SOUND LIKE YOU ARE DOING A WONDERFUL JOB I COULD NOT EMAGIN DOING IT BY MYSELF HAVE A WONDEFUL DAY A.

Having them close together will be wonderful once the baby gets to where he/she can play a bit. and they'll kind of entertain each other. My kids were 1 1/2 years apart and I won't kid you, it was busy. I literally stopped going to all the groups I was in just so I could rest. Toddlers are movers (especially boys), so I ended up using a carrier pack a lot with my daughter just so I could move with her easy.
I don't know if you have family in the area, but if so, utilize them. If not, check out the DM Metro Hip Mamas on Meetup.com, we just had our first start up meeting last night and it was awesome we would love to have you join.

We are going camping the weekend of the 15/16 out at Saylorville lake (Prairie Flower Rec Area--Honeysuckle Loop) . If you like to do anything like that you're welcome to join us. We have extra tents.

My kids are about 16 months apart and they were both girls. You will be so busy that time will fly by. My advise to you is to enjoy it while you can!! Start to save money even if it is a few dollars a week, because 2 in diapers is not cheap!! Take avantage of your family and close friends now and remember that this wouldn't have happened to you if God didn't want you to have another child. You sound like a great mom to be doing it all. Congrats and Good Luck!!
If you want to talk more give me a shout!!
____@____.com
A.

I'm not single, but my husband works out of town, so I feel like I am single alot of the time. My 2 boys are 23 months apart and it was kindof stressful at times, mainly because my second son, when he was an infant, had tummy problems and was crying all the time. They are now 2 and 4 and are best friends. I am glad they have each other to entertain one another. The 2 year old wants to do everything that the 4 year old wants to do, which can be hard sometimes. But what good playmates.

I'm kind of in the same situation as you and definately know what you are going through. My daughter will be 2 this July and my son will be 6 months at the end of this month. I currently stay home with the two of them and I love it. For me though I had to learn to be patient with both of them not just the older one. And ever sice then things have been pretty good with them. My "fiance" on the other hand is a different story, even though we are together I feel like a single mom of two. He doesn't help me at all, if I go anywhere, gym, grocery store, anywhere, the kids are with me, never him. He leaves when he wants and comes back home when he wants. I do understand where you are coming from if you need anyone to talk to just let me know, because it can get lonely

Hi my name is Desi and I also was in your situation a while ago. I had my first child when I was 17 and 6 months after he was born I found out that I was pregnant again. I was scared out of my mind. I made my mom take a week off of work after my 2nd child was born because I didn't think I could handle a 14 month old and a new born. But I did. I just came up with some good routines. Like in the morning when I knew that the new baby was going to need to be fed soon I would get my oldest up a little early and get him his breakfast and get him changed and dressed first. Then by the time that was over with he was content to play or watch cartoons, so at that point I could tend to the new baby. It just takes time to get used to things and come up with routines that work for you. But if I can do it so can you. Now I am 24 with four children and I'm 7 months pregnant. My oldest is 7 and my daughter is 6 and my other son is 4 and my youngest is 2. So trust me handleing 2 kids is alot easier than you think. If you need any other advice or you just wan't to talk just let me know. By the way congradulations and happy birthday.
Your friend
Desi

my boys are only 17 months apart and i'm a single mom i had my 3rd boy and he was only 27 months apart from the 2nd one when i had my second one i was recently divorced so i was doing it all on my own... if you ever need someone to talk to feel free to message me i know its hard but its worth it there are lots of people that will support you.. my boys are so close its hard to keep them apart.

Early Happy Birthday!
How exciting and scary at the same time!
Here is a link to some other single mommies groups. I bet there are a bunch in your situation :)
http://www.desmoinesfamilies.com/meetups.html
good-luck :)
L.

I'm 30 yrs old and a single mom. I just found out that I'm pregnant...I'm freaking out and my daughter is 8! You are not alone! I don't think the age of the first born makes any difference at all! (obviously, because I am freaking out about the whole situation) We all need friends in life and if you need one I'm here for ya (pregnant friends at the same time are the best because YOU know THEY know what you're going thru!) This news is going to rock my daughters world and I'm totally afraid it's not going to go over well with her at first. I'm not telling her til I have to (when I start showing) but I panic just looking at her wondering how's it going to be...Don't feel alone!

My kids are a little further apart but it seemed like they were closer in age. All I can say is have a support system. Having someone to talk to even about things you might think trivial will really help. Also BREATHE! Take a few seconds and slow down. I know easier said than done but this helped me when I was stressed. It seems like your overwhelmed and possibly could be but it all gets better. I promise. :) Good luck and Congrats on your new miracle. I know being a single mom is hard so take the help that is offered. That is one mistake I made. I thought I could do it all on my own and I think sometimes you have to just swallow your pride and take the help. Hope this put you at ease and didn't make things worse. :)
H.

Hi S. K. Please go to www.mayasmom.com, it is a great site with lots of advice.

I was a single mom with my first baby and then I got pregnant with my second when the first was nine months old. I did marry the father of the second but he worked two jobs so he was never home. In the beginning it was hard but you find out that somehow you can hold a baby with a bottle, grab the arm of the toddler and keep what he was getting from falling. It's amazing! Once the new one is a few months older it's actually easier. They become buddies as they grow up together and playmates. (They also get into trouble together!) I thinking shopping was the hardest. How do you get a cart load of stuff with a baby and a toddler? Use the buddy system. My friends are my lifeline and I am theirs. Without them being on the other end of the phone...I would have gone crazy! I now have three boys and my husband and I are now out numbered! They are all boys which keeps things interesting! Trust me when i say that the dishes can wait. Take a nap when YOU need it and learn how to multi-task!

Happy belated birthday!! I wont lie its a hard situation. I got divorced and took my 2 oldest with me. It was the most difficult thing but I knew it needed to happen for me to be happy. And then I met my new husband and we got married and had 2 boys about 13 months apart. I was scared. But now when i see those boys smile at me i know I made the right decision. If you wanna talk my email is ____@____.com.

As everyone else has told you, you will be quite busy. Especially at first, get help from anyone that you can--friends and family. My oldest 2 are 15 months apart, and I remember that it was challenging, but the rewards are great. They have been best friends ever since they were able to start playing together. They have always had each other to entertain themselves. Don't worry too much and take any help that is offered, you will do fine!!

S.,I would get as much rest as you can before the new one gets here.I just had my second child,who is now about 7weeks old and i also have a three year old and they are both needing my attention all the time.Sometimes i feel i can't give my older one enough attention.Try and set some special time for you and your first born to spend everyday with each other!

Hi.
I Have 2 kids. ages 10 and just turned one. I am also due in January with another baby and also scared about having 2 under the age of 2. It is going to be all right though. I have a friend who has 2 ten months apart and although it is stressful for her at times it is really ok, you will be fine. If you need to talk I am here. just email me.

Mom,
Congrats on your new baby to be. It is hard to be a mom no matter what. You are everything to your children. If there is a YWCA around you close they help provide moms with childcare and there are lots of other programs that they will help with. I know that our church is familiar with the Pregnant Crisis program that helps moms fill a dresser full of clothes for the newborn. If its telling your almose 2yr old about the baby there are lots of books at the library that will help you to tell them about the new baby that is growing inside. Hope some of these suggestions have helped. I know that when my daughters were born had it not been for the help of my grandmother and mother I probably would have gone crazy. Best of luck to you all.

First of all, Happy Birthday. Mine is the 8th too. My kids are now teens and are 11 months apart. I was a single parent until 5 years ago. You will be fine. It is ahrd but at least you don't ahve to worry about 2 people with different views trying to raise 2 little people. You will make all the right decisions. Just believe in yourself.

I bet you're a great mom and you will do fine. Enjoy the pregnacy and the great new little one. Haveing two isn't as hard as some think.

You've got plenty of time to work out everything. Your two year old will like having a sibling. Mostly. Read everything you can on the little one and abut siblings. That may set your mind at ease.

Good Luck and try not to worry.

Hi!
I understand what you are going through. It will be tough but you will manage.

Well when I had my 2nd child i was in a situation kind of like yours except i had already had my baby and then broke up with their "father" when she was 3 months old and I had a 4yr old also. It sucked at first but you really just get use to it. I really needed my friends and they helped ALOT!! Thank god for them or i would have went crazy some times! But dont stress whatever is going to happen is going to happen and im sure it will work out just fine. Rember to take time for yourself and relax! Pregnancy is hard enough and you dont need to worry about the smalll stuff! I you want to chat somtime just message me.

M.

Hey S.,
Happy belated birthday. I'm also a single mom, and it is a very scary situation. What's helped me the most is having a good support system. My son was 2 when I was pregnant with my daughter. What I did for him after she was born was take him out and had a "mommy/son date". We went to see whatever kid movie was playing at the theater, or went to his favorite store (things like that). That way he knew even though I was busy with the new baby that I still had time with him. Good luck and if you ever need anything, just send me a message.
C.