Should Child Be Driving Herself to Other Parents House After Getting License?

My sister is about to face this with her son.. He will get his licence in Feb, but in Texas there is a graduated licence.. He is not allowed to have a person in the car younger than 18 for a few months.. unless another driver than 18 is also in the car.. but after that , yes, he will be driving himself and sister to his dads home and then back to her house..

I think it should depend on how comfortable the parents feel and how safe of a driver the child is.. My nephew will actually only be driving within a few miles from his home with his mom to his home with his dad and then the schools that he and his sister attend..

Also we really do not have bad weather here, just really aggressive drivers..

I don't see a problem with it IF the newly licensed driver is responsible and mature.

My daughter just got her license over the holiday break and she started driving to school when school started back this week. However, Laurie is correct on the Texas laws. Our daughter can only have 1 person under 18 in the car with her. I am not sure how long this rule lasts but I like it.

It sounds like some tit for tat type arguments between the parents and one feeling the other is getting off the hook for something. That needs to be worked out between the parents in a mature manner. Everything will not be completely equal but in the long run, it usually evens out. A new driver should not be punished because the parents are arguing on who is getting off the hook on something. The younger driver should be supported by BOTH parents because driving is a big deal to these teens and a huge rie of passage.

One of our agreements is.... whenever she starts to go somewhere, she informs us of where she is going. When she reaches her destination she is to text or call to let us know she is safe. When she starts home, she texts or calls so we know she is on her way.

I worry like crazy but I know I have to let her go and I trust that I've done a good job.

Of course, driving is a priviledge and if the new driver is not being responsible, I am all for taking the keys away.

I think it is ok to allow the child to drive to the other parent's house especially if there are activities that he or she has to attend that she would otherwise drive too (sports practice, job, etc.). I know I did.

I do think that the other parent should at least provide gas money since it is helping them out too.

Always follow up with a call to insure they arrived safely (they should call you when they arrive but if not, you should call to check).

**update** Usually the visiting parent is responsible for transportation unless something else (like shared transportation) is specified in the court order so you'll want to check you agreement. Even if it is specified, it doesn't mean you can't allow your responsible teen to drive. Also, in DE, the passenger restrictions does not apply to immediate family members.

I think it all depends on how far she has to drive and how much driving experence she has under her belt. Since she has access to a car, I guess that means that you do trust her driving ability to a certain degree. If she has to drive quite a distance to the other parent's house, I think that I'd probably feel uncomfortable allowing her to drive her and her sister/brother that far without an adult in the car also until she gets a little more experience.

If the driving distance isn't that great and you know she is a good driver, even though it may be the other parent's responsibility to provide transportation, I guess I wouldn't get into it. Why start another fight because of this one issue? Just doesn't seem like it would be worth it, plus, your daughter would probably feel as if you don't trust her or are playing her in some way to get to the other parent.

Kowing how I worry I probaly would let my kids just start driving as soon as they get their license. My plan is that I would have to ride with them for at least six months (maybe longer) until I feel confident that they are responsiible drivers and they really do know and are following all the rules of driving.
My co-worker's daughter just go her license a few months ago and she immediately let her drive all over the place looking for jobs. Her daughter also has the car while she is working and will come and pick her mom up from work at the end of the day. No way could I be that brave.

My answer would be that it's not a good idea. No matter how trustworthy the child is after getting their license.
My son will be 16 soon and his dad insists on getting him his license right away.
A license is one thing, but don't forget that there are court orders involved with visitation and what might seem like a convenience could turn into a problem.
I, personally, (knowing my ex as I do), will continue to make sure my son gets to his dad's everytime, ON TIME, to keep the possibility of conflict down.
As far as getting to school, etc, I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
My son having a license won't mean he has the money to drive himself around. The school bus picks him up right on the corner. No need for him to drive to school.
In California, I believe there are laws about a young licensed driver having other minors in the car without an adult within a certain time frame after receiving their license.
The best bet, in my opinion, is for the adults to make sure the kids are transported safely and timely back and forth according to the visitation schedule.
That's just one of those things I wouldn't want to leave up to a kid, but I guess it also depends on the parents and if they both agree.

I think it depends on the maturity of the child in question. If I had gotten my license when I was still visiting my mom's house, I probably would have been the main transportation... Mostly because I would want my car over the weekend and it wouldn't make sense to have 2 trips to the same place. I was working, and very mature for my age, so it wouldn't have been a problem. Now, if my older brother had gotten his license, it would have been a completely different story. lol.

California's law is no one in the car under 18 for the first year. Which think is stupid for siblings. It makes no sense to require two cars & two drivers to go to the same place for siblings. I wonder if this law will be changed when gas hits $4/gallon (we haven't be under $3/gallon in forever). I have no idea about the parent's responsibility in this as your question asked. I read recently that after getting their liscence the most growth in their ability happens when their is not an adult in the car. Makes sense because you are learning by experience and not by someone telling you what to do. Hard for us parents though. Their biggest problem is inexperience and only experience can correct that. Maybe you could negotiate that during the first six months the younger child has to be picked up by the parent.

It depends on how responsible your eldest is and how far they would have to go. If they are responsible and the distance is not a concern, then I don't see a problem with it as long as there is communication between you and your ex to make sure they get there and back fine. If your child solely depends on you for gas money, I would suggest that your ex contribute to it as well. Just because your ex will no longer have to physically come and get them, there are other ways they can contribute to it. Good luck!

Some visitation orders are stated the parent has to pick up or a meeting place. If yours does, I would follow that first. I would be uncomfortable with allowing my newly licensed teenager to drive that distance with her younger sibling. So I would say no.

I would still drive them for a while, if I were the parent.

First of all, I want to kee lines of communication open. Mostly with the child, and driving them to and picking up from other parent's house is a good time to talk, especially as there will be the weekend when you're not seeing them at all.

Second, just because the state gives a kid a license, it doesn't mean they are ready to just take off. Most states now at least recommend a parent or other responsible licensed driver in the car (not another teen) for the first 6 months. Teens have about the highest accident rate, mostly because of lack of experience and judgement skills aren't all there. And with a younger sibling involved, there is more potential for distraction and horseplay!

Also consider, if the child is gone for the weekend, the car is too. Which would require an extra car, in most cases.

it's illegal here for a newly licensed drive to transport anyone under the age of 18 without an adult licensed driver also in the car. i think many rules regarding kids and driving are ridiculous, but i like this one.
i would certainly let the older child drive to the other parent's home if it's not too far and the kid is generally responsible, but would not permit the sibling to ride with them without an adult present.
khairete
S.