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It's normal for kids that age to hit in frustration or anger, but they must be taught that, normal or not, it is unacceptable.
When my daughter was little and tried to hit, I simply caught her arm before she made contact, gripped it firmly enough that she couldn't pull away, got in her face, eye to eye, and told her in no uncertain terms, "You will NOT hit."

She's doing it because you haven't stopped her.

What are you doing to stop her? You have to be consistant when disciplining children.

She may also be doing it to get attention if you are focused on your new baby, preparations fir the upcoming change.

Figure out what discipline works for you. Ours was putting favorite toys in time out and no tv or computer games.

Speak to her with authority. Most importantly... Consistency.

She's still young but she should be able to understand in time.

Also, I did my best to not use the word "no". It's easy with little ones to get in the habit of saying "no" far too much.

Toddlers hit and bit and scream. You need to work with them on appropriate behavior. Consider: http://mommyshorts.com/2012/04/a-5-step-approach-to-stop-...

Tell her "No hitting", put her in time out if necessary, and show her what to do instead/catch her being good.

What Oneperfectone said. Firm no, tell her what not to do and why in short, direct sentences. She doesn't have the words yet to express her frustration. Be firm. Don't hit her back - that sends a really confusing message.

As she gets older, the tool of "how would you feel if ____?" to get them to think about actions and consequences is a helpful thing as well. They need to know exactly what NOT to do, then what TO do, and why. Specific is better than general - "behave" means NOTHING to a child. "Don't do x, do y, because ..." gives them the info they need.

it's so tough to have a toddler and be pregnant! you're tired and frazzled, and the 2s are so challenging.

so take a deep breath, and put your feet up for 30 seconds when you can.

even if your 2 year old is verbal, she's very limited in her ability to express herself. physicality is all she has. so be understanding of that.

that doesn't mean she gets to hit. but don't expect an easy fix. i would catch that flying little fist, return it to her side and say firmly 'no hitting.'

that's it. over and over.

she's only 2. she won't understand complicated explanations about using her words and being nice and controlling herself. she just needs the firm clear no-nonsense rule that she's not allowed to hit.

once you've got that one down, it's great to find redirection methods and help her express herself and work on alternative coping techniques.

but for now know that a) she's doing it because she has no other way of getting her point across and b) you stop it by simple firmness, applied to the point of madness, so that she understands that you mean it.

ETA please ignore the predictable advice from one poster that hitting little kids teaches them to stop hitting. the Wack is strong...........
khairete
S.

Completely normal behavior, next time she hits hold her hand and tell her "NO". Repeat as necessary, she will get it in only a few days.

Your child is 2. That's why. Two year olds have no boundaries. It's your job to teach her.

When she goes to hit you, grab her hands and hold them firmly without letting them go. Tell her "No hitting!" and then put her in a pack and play and walk away from her. Let her cry. Pay no attention to her. Let it last for two minutes. Then when you go to get her out of the pack and play, remind her that she may not hit.

Do it every single time. And it takes a long time to unlearn a habit at this age.

Hold her hands/arms. Get right down at her level and say FIRMLY "No hitting. We don't hit. Hitting hurts." Repeat repeat repeat.
Also can be followed immediately by a 2 minute time out. Look up Supernanny's correct time out procedure.

Hi S. - welcome to Mamapedia.

One quick suggestion before I answer your question: put a more descriptive title in your question like "toddler hits when she doesn't get her way" - you'll get better responses than when people don't know the topic.

Second - it's so much harder to deal with things when you are pregnant. You have one nerve left, and she's getting on it!

Toddlers don't have the verbal skills to express frustration - so they hit or bite or yell or throw things. That's completely normal. Frustrating, but normal. I'm not sure what techniques you have tried, but my suggestion is that you NOT try to reason with her. She's not even 2. She only understands her own "language" and her own reality, which is that if she does A, she gets B. If A is good, so is B. If A is bad, so is B.

So you do one of 2 things, depending on where you are. If you are at home and she hits, you deprive her of what she wants - her toys and her mom. You must do what is immediate - no delays like "no TV later" or "no dessert tonight" - kids under 6 just don't get that at all. So you pop her into her crib and you shut the door. She has nothing - no toys, no fun, but she is safe. If you are out, then you put her in the car seat as quickly as possible, no talking, no discussion except "We don't hit" or "we don't bite". That's all. If she wails and whines, fine. Put yourself where you cannot hear it - another room, or outside the car if you have to. I used to stand where my child could see me (so he didn't feel abandoned, just ignored) and I would read a book or do a Sudoku puzzle (kept a book in my purse for just this purpose). He learned pretty quickly that hitting = no fun.

So I don't know what you mean when you say you "discipline her" - whatever you are doing, it's not working if she's hitting all day long. You must make the consequences (not punishments) suitable. She's not yet 2, so figure 2 minutes tops. Then take her out of the crib/car seat and try again. Second offense? Back in the restrictive setting. If you have to do it 20 times, do it. You won't have to for more than a few days.

And remember that she's about to have her entire world turned upside down when the baby comes. So get this done now, so it's out of the way and not associated with the baby. You also want her under control and starting (just starting at this age) to use words (you'll have to help supply them for now - be brief and succinct) so she doesn't decide that hitting a baby is a good idea.

Mostly, you have to model self-control and not fly off the handle (as annoying as she can be) because you don't want her to do that too.

Good luck!

Well, you're pregnant - her world is about to be rocked by the arrival of a sibling - and she's NOT going to like it - that's one reason.
Terrible Two's - that's another reason.
AND she'll likely have a rocky Terrible Three's period before she settles down.
And by then the NEXT one will be approaching the Terrible Two's.
So you're going to be having an interesting next couple of years!

We only have one son, so we didn't have the siblings issues - and he didn't have to share me or Dad with anyone.
What I did was to sit him on my lap in his room in the rocking chair and hold him so he couldn't hit me but couldn't get away -longest tantrum was about 1 1/2 hrs long.
Each time he'd eventually calm down and then he'd WANT to snuggle and have some rocky baby time in my lap.

My sister, on the other hand, use to have terrible tantrums - she'd kick and scream and bang her head against the floor.
And the only thing that worked to stop it was - my Mom walked away and left the room.
When the audience was gone - the performance was OVER.

Different kids need different methods.
You're going to have to find what will work best for yours.
Take heart though - they DO eventually grow out of it sooner or later!
Gird up your patience, hire a baby sitter every so often - and treat yourself to a relaxing bubble bath every now and then.

I would suggest that you restrain her in a chair with your arms wrapped around her in a BIG hug. I would keep saying...over and over..that "hitting hurts. We touch gently, just like YOU want to be touched". Then, I would stroke her face and head, and say "this is gentle touch..how we ALL want to be touched". Then, I would 'give her words' that describe what she is feeling. "you are angry that I had to take *X* from you. I understand, but it was not safe"...
Hope that helps. Best luck!

Can you just say calmly no hitting (I'm sure you have already) and then just say that when she's being kind again, you'd love to read her a story? Or if she hits you when you take something from her, can you say "When you stop hitting me, you can have it back" (or something along those lines so that it's not so much punishing as rewarding her for not hitting?).

I used to do some sort of variation like that. If they hit you it's because they're upset you're stopping their fun. If you say no, they are upset. So if you said "if you can be a kind girl, you can play with that again later. If you hit mommy, then I'll have to put it away" or whatever she can understand. Let her know that there are consequences (gently).

One of mine couldn't hear when he was a toddler, and I ran into this all the time because he had no idea what I was saying. I used to hold him a lot because he was just upset. They just think you're being mean. A 2 year old doesn't always understand why they can't have that toy. Distraction can be a big help too.

Good luck :)

she's doing it because it's a natural response for a toddler

to get her to stop , when she does it take her hand and make it so her hand is open and flat and use that hand to pet you or whomever or whatever she hit, and very nicely say, ''we use gentle hands''... do this every time she hits - you want to teach her what you do want, not just react, but you have to do it every time in a calm nice manner and show what you she should do

as far as you being pregnant, she has no clue at her age what that means so don't create issues by thinking she is jealous, she is purely acting her age, that's what toddlers do