Help! Need to Get 11 Month Old to Stop Hitting

Updated on June 03, 2008
K.M. asks from Los Gatos, CA
7 answers

Hello,

I have an 11 month old baby girl and now for about 2 weeks she has started hitting us. She is a pretty active girl and we spend lots of times with her, playing, reading, cuddling, etc I take her to classes and see family, etc. The last few weeks she has become more vocal & active when something doesn't go the way she wants. She likes to hit people on the face and head, when I try to feed her she hits the plate to dump the food on the floor. My mom has come to visit and help watching her but she was shocked (to say the least) when my daughter started hitting my mom on the face, and then when my mom wouldn't give her sunglasses my daughter hit my mom with her own little forhead and then she threw herself on the floor screamming.

Please give me some advice, I don't know how help her stop hitting and throwing the temper tantrums when something is not allowed to chew or throw (are your kids having tantrums at such short age???)
K.

What can I do next?

  • Add yourAnswer own comment
  • Ask your own question Add Question
  • Join the Mamapedia community Mamapedia
  • as inappropriate
  • this with your friends

More Answers

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

N.K.

answers from San Francisco on

With a child this young, you really can't assume she has an awareness of her behavior. So you can't punish her like you would an older child. I have four children and they've gone through phases like this. My best advice for you is to model the behavior you want her to mimic. If she hits you or someone else, immediately tell her "No hit" or something like that and then say "Soft" or "Gentle" and gently stroke her hand or use her hand to gently stroke your face. You may find words that are more effective for you to use but the essence is to show her how you want her to behave. All she knows is from you and your husband.

I think ignoring her behavior may work in some instances but it doesn't address how you want her to behave. And she won't know unless you tell her.

Good luck!

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.D.

answers from San Francisco on

LOL... I am sorry to laugh, but that is EXACTLY the same age when my son started doing that. Hi sDr. said that most of the time hitting us is because he is so happy to see us, and he gets so excited it's the only way for him to get his excitement out since he can't say words yet. The temper tantrums started too at 11 months. He just truned a year, so I guess it is the normal process of their emotions getting the best of them. Good luck! :-)

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.E.

answers from San Francisco on

Obviously, she believes this behavior gets her what she wants.
I'm sure she understands the word no, so use it.

When she starts to hit or makes contact, hold her hands,say,"No," and hten remove her from the situation...a baby time out. Have her sit on the floor and give her no attention. If she throws a fit, she throws a fit.

Baby time out should be very short, 1 minute.

My daughter didn't hit, but she did pull hair. This is what we did and she stopped. We consistently put her on a small ladybug carpet for moments like this. She soon associated sitting on the carpet as a time out place.

To this day, we can say, "Do you need to sit on your carpet?" She's going to be 7 next month.

S

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

S.S.

answers from San Francisco on

My 14 mo. old son throws terrible tantrums when he doesn't get his way or we take something from him. He head butts us and hits his own head on the floor. Sometimes he hits his own face as well as us. I just firmly say "No" and put him down if I am holding him. At home when he throws a fit, as long as he is safe, I ignore it and walk away. A little harder to do when you're out at a store. I try to remain calm and firmly tell him "No Hitting." Sometimes I just have to pick up a screaming child and leave. (as quickly as I can.) I call this time "The Ornery Ones". It's a preview of "The Terrible Twos" that nobody told you about.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

P.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Your daughter has learned that she has some control in her world. Therefore, she is ready to learn that there are consequences for her behavior. I would strongly recommend that you use a time-out every time she hits or throws a temper tantrum. If she continues to misbehave while in time out, move her to a place where she cannot cause damage and do not respond to her until she calms herself down. If she comes out of time-out, place her back in the spot and repeat that she can rejoin the group when she has calmed herself down-- not hitting, no throwing things, no temper tantrums. Strong-willed children can start asserting their authority at a very young age. Often this improves when they develop a larger vocabulary and use it to express themselves with words. I would strongly encourage you to work with your daughter on her communications. Practice speaking with her and give her attaboys when she repeats the words you want her to say. When she has hissy fits, vocalize what she might be feeling and tell her to use her words. Eleven months of age is old enough to be speaking in isolated words and some short phrases. If you work with her now, she will soon have the power to say what she wants and what's frustrating her, which is much more socially acceptable than hitting and throwing things.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

C.L.

answers from San Francisco on

She's seeking negative attention. When she hits, tell her no and leave her for a few minutes. How soon she changes her behavior changes depends how fast she learns things. (my 2 learned real quick). Of course, you have to stand firm and not give in.

On a child that young, any form of spanking/swatting on the bottom is very counteractive. How you do get a child to stop hitting when you hit them? They don't differentiate between you doing it and them doing it. To them, hitting is hitting.

Smallavatar-fefd015f3e6a23a79637b7ec8e9ddaa6

H.A.

answers from San Francisco on

Here when the no's start. A firm no then put her down and ignore. She wants your attention and if you take it away the behavior will stop. Do it now because it could get worse. As she gets older you can tell her hitting is not ok. Then you move up to time outs as they get older. Its all part of parenting. With expierence I have found gentle and firm works with my girls.

For Updates and Special Promotions
Follow Us

Related Questions

Related Searches