Phone Phobia -- Have You Had It/gotten over It? Need Advice

.

I used to be like this also, but only when dealing with my personal business. I work in the legal field, and can call anyone when I am working. But as soon as it came to making a call to take care of my own personal business, I was frozen! I just started forcing myself to pick up and phone and dial without thinking about it. If I thought about it, I would procrastinate until it was too late in the day to make the call. If I just pick up the phone and start dialing without thought, it works out much better. Now I've gotten over it and will call anyone, anytime for any reason - personal or professional!

Ever since texting was made popular i have been the same way. I am fine texting till my fingers fall off for hours when i could have just talked on the phone in 10 minutes and been done. I hate calling people and often dont anwer then send them a text asking what they want. lol
Mostly its because if i answer the phone my kids will want something and its hard to carry on a conversation. Way easier to take my time texting when i have a free moment. : )
I only talk on the phone with a handful of people.

I had that fear as well. Now I've been in a job where I HAVE to answer the phone and answer questions. I got pretty used to it after a few weeks and NOW I could talk to the president without getting flustered (I think).
I used to hate calling in a prescription refill even, so I know how you feel. It's an IRRATIONAL fear, that's what you need to tell yourself. Most people on the other end are there to do "customer service" and you are the customer.
THe only thing I really hate about the phone now is BEING ON HOLD forever, and ever and ever and ever. I've learned to give hold no longer than 5 minutes.

I know how you feel, I'm kinda the same way. I really dislike calling people I don't know well, and whenever possible I make someone else do it. I feel a lot better about doing it myself if I am well prepared. So sometimes I will write myself a script. It sounds silly, but that way if I have to leave a message on a voicemail or something, I don't come off sounding like an idiot.

Probably anxiety of the unknown.

At your help desk job, you knew what it was for... help desk.
Per filing in as receptionist and answering the phone, it is not as defined. You don't know why people are calling.
Per your friends/dates calling, well you know them and it is more predictable.

Perhaps, the thing is to seek Therapy for it. Phobias.

Does your daughter KNOW you are this way? Thus, she is simply being like you? Or does she too, have this phobic anxiety about the phone?

My mom is this way.. it's a headache dealing with it. She has us call her bank, dr, mortgage company... anyone she needs to call. Which is odd b/c she she is a highly capable woman who get this... works in a field as a where she is on the phone with attorneys/workman's comp/dr's and patients all day and she is just fine with it.

Even when we were preteens she had us doing this for her. I have since stopped, but my sis continues b/c my mom pitches a fit, though she IS improving. So, all I can say is if you are showing your stress or having people make calls for you in front of your daughter, to first do it privately and not in front of her, b/c that could be a root of her problem since children pick up our stressors and internalize them.

Then, make notes if you need to help the conversation, have a dialogue ready in your head, keep it short and learn to get over your fears. Good luck!

I myself, am not a phone talker. I don't mind doing business or making calls to get things done, but just plain chatting with friends or relatives, not my style.

My daughter, husband and I are all the same. When calling the doctor, or anyone other then family I make notes before calling. I know I am going to get nervous so I write down any information I may need. It has helped some.

I was that like...so much as a teenager I rather walk into the dr's office, hair salon or whatever and make the appointment in person. I used to joke around that I must have been strangled by a phone cord in my past life. It all seemed to have faded (I still get a little anxious) since I got my first job in the billing department for a medium sized hospital.

I was more of a patient representative so I was on the front end with all patients regarding complaints and billing questions. Also had to do cold calls to try to collect on outstanding bills. I always tell my husband that was the worst job for me anxiety wise, but definitely the best thing in terms of getting me comfortable on the phone. Funny thing is I still hate making generic phone calls like ordering pizza, or making appointments for myself, but have no problems dealing with the kids stuff.

I still refuse to answer the phone at home, but not because I'm scared or anxious just because I really hate talking on the phone unless its on my terms :)

I have it a little bit but I chalk it up to our "computer" generated world. It's so much easier to hide behind an email or text. I get nervous when I have to call anyone in person now days (except family). The other day I had to return a phone call to a woman I go to church with that was seeking some information I had. Why I got anxiety over returning her call, I don't know. Back in the day before email/texting you had no choice BUT to call someone on the phone. It's caused me to be a sissy I guess, but I do it cause clearly, I have to or nothing would get done around my house. As far as getting over it, all I can say is that the more you do it, the more it gets easier (I should take my own advice though,LOL!).

I understand you completely. The thing that helped me get through this was to make a list of all happy, comfortable people I could talk to at any time and start calling. Make 2 calls/day to those people and the people in between will be so much easier. GL~

M

Crazy! I have the same problem! What is worse--I married someone with the same affliction! You should see us when it is time to order pizza!!! Thank gawd for emails! Maybe you could practice making calls to your daughter---it might be helpful for both of you. Good luck!

The phone offers anonymity. Most of the people I talk to have the opposite problem of "telephone testicles." That is when someone is a major pain to you on the phone but act nice as pie in person. Just practice. Write down your keys points/questions. That way you don't lose your train of thought. cb

I used to feel this way to some extent. What helped me was to physically write out what I needed to say and read it to whomever I was calling. So, for example, the doctor: "Hi, I'm calling to make an appointment for my son."

If you're a receptionist, maybe just write out how you would answer the phone and put it right in front of you: "Company name, how may I direct your call?" So at least you don't get that last minute paralysis when you hear the phone ring.

Good luck. It does get better. Like anything, it's all about practice practice practice. Seriously, now it doesn't even faze me to answer or make phone calls.

When I was growing up, my brother and I both didn't like talking on the phone much. We ordered take out pizza only once in high school, and argued over who had to make the call. We get along great, but he has only called me twice in the last 10 years.
I agree with the advice of starting with a written script. I had a job in telemarketing for 5 years, with different greetings for different incoming lines(I still remember them 10 years later). I would also have a paper and pen to take notes during the call so I wouldn't be worried about remembering what they said.
I hated outbound telemarketing, but I did it when I had to. And I can still put those skills to use when I have to make tons of everyday calls for doctor appointments, argue with the insurance company, talk to teachers about my son's behavior, etc.

My husband never liked making phone calls because he stuttered. When he first applied for the job he has now, he had to call and leave a voicemail. His workaround was to make a recording on the computer, and then when he had it perfect he called back and played the recording to leave as the voicemail. He hardly ever has a problem now because he has spent so much time on the phone at work he got used to it.

I just wanted to say THANK YOU for posting this question! I know it took guts, and I have had the same anxiety for as long as I can remember - but never told a soul because it seemed like everyone else was ok with the phone! I really think it has to do with personality type. I am very much a type A planner - everything I do has a list, and I do have anxiety if something isn't planned out. If the situation doesn't happen according to the list, that's ok, but I need a plan to start with or I get very upset. I think that translates to the phone....it's something you can't plan, you have to totally wing it and that scares me! BUT - the idea of making notes ahead of time is brilliant! I will have to try that next time and see how it goes!

I think its more of an anxiety thing than anything. I find it best to reason with myself when I get crazy about things. Like I don't like going into a new gas station. I use the same one as much as I can. But when I find myself being crazy nervous or scared I talk myself through it. "whats the worst that can happen, relax you got this , or just go in and get it over with no big deal." you can talk to yourself (in your head not aloud) quickly to just over come it. I know its real and its overwhelming that silly feeling but thats just it a feeling that is holding youself back. I find it best to be firm with these situations but you should adjust it to the type of person you are. If you need a kinder aproach dont beat youself up about it be nice to you ;D

I HATE calling people and dealing with that stuff..........funny i thought i was the only one. My husband calls it procrastination,,,,i call it uncomfortable!

I'm with you, I HATE talking on the phone! Thank God for texting, im-ing, email, etc, without it I'd have spiraled into obscurity years ago!

:)

(It's a generational thing too, you know, my teenagers NEVER talk on the phone! We have enough carry over minutes to last a lifetime.)