J.B. asks from Canon City, CO on September 22, 2007
My Three Year Old Has Mood Swings.
I have a three month old, a two year old and a three and a half year old. I know all kids go through their phases and stages. I just got my two year old out of biting and I have been working on my three year old's listening skills.
My three year old is such a sweetheart and an awesome big brother, but it seems like when he is in a certain mood, maybe every other week, he makes me wonder why I am staying home doing daycare to be with him when he can act like he hates me sooo much.
I try to be loving, I have talks, warn him about his behavior, and when he still doesn't listen, I send him to timeout. He has began throwing things on the way to timeout, slamming doors, and saying really hateful things.. He says "I don't like you mommy," "You're a mean mommy" and "I'm gonna break you"... He use to say he was gonna put me in the trash if he didn't like timeout and yesterday, he told me he was gonna cut off my arms.
I stay at home with him and his brothers, I do home daycare and so I know where all his influences are. He does NOT get talked to like this by me or my husband or his baby brothers.. It is like he is sooo frustrated he has to say really mean things to vent and get it out.. it just builds up and builds up.. I told him if bad things keep coming out of his mouth, I will wash it out.. Yesterday after he was so hateful, I did wash his mouth out and after his timeout that didn't really go to well cause he was spitting the whole time, I had him clean up his spit and gave him a drink of water to get the taste out of his mouth.
I am so frustrated, because this is my sweet little sensitive boy who can be soooo caring and sweet sometimes and so hateful at other times I feel like I must be doing something wrong but I don't know what.. can anybody help??
L.T. answers from Grand Junction on September 23, 2007
I am sorry you are having such a hard time with your son, he is at an age where he is saying things to get a reaction from you, and it sounds like he is. The best response when he says mean things is "I know." "I know I'm a mean mommy, but this is what's best for you." "I know you don't like me right now, but I still love you." etc Don't let him get a reaction from you and it will go away, though you may have to work at it. I know it is hard to hear these things from your baby, but he doesn't mean them, he's just pushing boundries.
C.D. answers from Denver on September 22, 2007
Do you and your family have a church home? At our church they have classes and nurturing for the little ones, while the parents get nurturing, love and nourishment for their spirit and soul during worship.A great place to get peace of mind... Southeast Community Church/Jordan Rd/Parker
My grandson (now age 4) was a handful until my daughter got him involved in church. Now his focus is on loving and helping his mom and dad, and he honors them with good behavior most of the time. Hope you will give it a try.
Love and Blessings,
M.G. answers from Denver on September 22, 2007
Check his sugar, my 6yr.old is severely hypoglycemic and when her sugar is low - she is rotten. Try cutting down on sugar and feeding him every 2 hrs. protein is the key and if he does not change then I would say try something else. When our daughter is ugly, she usually needs healthy food, fruit, veg, meat and cheese. I could elaborate but you may just look up hypoglycemia. Another thing is he may be growing or cutting molars.
feel free to e-mail me if you want to bounce off some ideas. My hubby is a nurse, and I have run an in home daycare for normal healthy kids and Autistic and terminally ill so I have a few ideas.
M.C. answers from Albany on September 22, 2007
As a start, if you have not already, I would cut out all artificial colorings and flavorings, hydrogenated oils, white flour, sugar, and high fructose corn syrup out of your diet and make sure that he gets a balanced diet and good nutrients, maybe even a multi, probiotics, and fish oil.
N.M. answers from Denver on September 23, 2007
This is just a thought but maybe he is acting out because he feels he isn't getting enough attention since you have to manage your time between 3 kids. Is there other kids his age in the neighborhood that he can play with?
Also if you live near a rec center they might have a playgroup that you could take him to. Then he can see how the other kids behave. You can email me as well if you want to talk.
A.W. answers from Denver on September 23, 2007
hi! i read the others' posts, and so i know i am reiterating their advice, but the things that occurred to me were- hewants more of your attention, and as hard as it is, i find with my daughter that even though i want to discipline her for acting out, what she really needs and responds to is love- a comforting voice tone, maybe some comforting toys, and if she'll let me, a hug or holding for awhile. also i would say really check his diet. my first thought was sugar, in all refined forms, even fruit juice raises blood sugar really quick, and then of course, they crash. my daughter is really sensitive, just like me, and when she crashes she is like a different person. we don't really eat artificial colors and stuff, but i'm sure pp is right about those as well.
hope this helps, peace!