Mean Mommy?

Mean? Not AT ALL! Completely normal! When my son started on "real" food I made his baby food so that he would eat what we eat. He is now 16 months and his diet consists of PB sandwiches, chicken nuggets, turkey & chicken (occasionally) and a few fruits and veggies. He is much more opinionated than his "early" months. I used to worry when he would not eat what I prepared and I would rush back to the kitchen to make him something else. I finally realized that he will NOT starve himself. Plus - sometimes he is hungry and sometimes he is not. Now, I prepare his meals and keep my fingers crossed. There is no way to "reason" with him at this age so I am trying to go with the flow. The less fuss I make, the more likely he is to actually eat something when I am not looking.

As for the nap thing, my son went through this phase too. Even now, sometimes he naps well, sometimes not. Even if he does not fall asleep, I still put him in his crib for "quiet" time. Sometimes he talks to himself for a while and sometimes he falls asleep. It seems like just when I think I have things figured out - everything changes again. Good Luck!

Two is just the average age - it doesn't end with the third birthday either. :)

I handled it by fixing a staple and family dinner - i.e. spaghetti is our staple, my husband and I are having chicken and vegetables. My son can pick from spaghetti, chicken, and or vegetables or he isn't hungry enough. So then he waits until 2 hours later, when he can pick between apple or string cheese.

I make them take a nap. IF you let him become a whiny evil little monster you're not doing either one of you any favors. Children want discipline and they need boundaries that they know their parents will enforce. Otherwise they get anxiety disorders.

S.

That sounds like a typical toddler to me!! My daughter
is 18 months and does a lot of the same things. There are many different oppinions on this issue, I'll share what I do, and I know there will be pleanty of people who disagree. You just have to decide what you feel is best for you and your son. I do not make extra meals, never had and never will, all 3 of my kids have done what your saying, what I cook for a meal is there only option. I do not force them to eat, it is their choice, but they have learned that if they chose not to eat they will be hungry (natural consequenses) and I always point it out to them. An hour after breakfast, if they are begging for a snack, I say no, it is not snack time, you are hungry because you chose not to eat your breakfast (obviously I can't explain this to my 18 month old, but I make her wait). Now at the same time with my older children 7 and 4I have learned what they really like and dislike and If I make a dinner that I know they will not like, then I make a side to serve with dinner that I know they will like, so they have choices.

As for nap, I would encourage you to break the habit he is trying to make, put him down for nap and do not get him up, even if he chooses not to nap he will get in the habit of having a quiet/rest time everyday at the same time, and it gives you a little time to recouperate also, especially if he is grummpy in the evening. I've had more than one toddler manage to keep themselves awake until I'm just about ready to get them out, then they pass out!! Our house rule is that you stay in your bed for at least 1.5 hrs, only an hour at the age of 4, they need the time to rest even if they don't sleep!!

I know how you feel. My son is over 2 1/2 and most of the time he doesn't take a nap but he still has his rest time regardless. If he doesn't get his rest time he turns into a terrior. I put him down at 1 and get him out at 3 give or take depending on what time he wakes up in the morning and such. On the nights he doesn't SLEEP he is back in the crib at 7 and lights out by 7:30 and asleep by 7:45-8:00 and usually sleeps til 8am give or take.
AS far as food maybe give him more variety, just a thought.
Good Luck.
M.

Sounds like a typical, healthy, normal growing boy to me too. (Like that's what you wanted to hear, right?)

Regarding the food, I wouldn't make a big deal of it. Keep offering him what you're serving. If he doesn't eat it, fine. He's not going to starve. If he's truly hungry, he will eat. The nutritional requirements of a toddler are far less than we adults realize I think. Just make sure he's getting his milk, fruit/veggies, protein, whole grains etc. -- normal healthy things. I try and feed my son healthy things I know he will eat for breakfast and lunch. I try and serve at least one food I know my son will eat at dinner. Under no circumstances (unless dh & I are craving spicy food)will I 2 different meals though. I want to avoid nurturing a chicken nugget/hot dog/grilled cheese only child.

Re the nap.... He seems a bit young to be dropping it, but I know of a couple who did at that age. It's hard. What my friends did was to institute a "quiet time" rule. The child would go to his or her room for a few hours. Whether or not they slept, mommy didn't care. They just had to stay in the room. You might try something similar. Worst case.... drive him around in the car until he konks out and take a book with you to Sonic (not like I've EVER done that myself).

Here's what I did or do as my 3 year old has gone through those same phases, I don't want to raise a "picky eater" so I tell him it's okay if he doesn't eat his dinner, however he won't get his treat(or whatever it is he is requesting instead) until he finishes it...if he chooses not to eat then he doesn't get the treat (I try to give him rewards for his good behavior such as stickers, m&m's, special play time etc.) Sometimes, when appropriate it may be apart of his next meal or snack.

For naps...he now knows that he and his baby brother must have rest/quiet time, he doesn't always sleep either, but he must be quiet and I do reward him for that. We've had to work on it, just be consistent, discipline when you need to and give rewards for when he does do what you ask. The reward system has worked wonderfully for me especially during potty training. Simply, he gets smiley faces and stars for good behavior which add up to special treats...and they get erased when he is naughty which may result into time-out, taking a favorite toy or other discipline. Hope the best for you and God bless you!

My oldest stopped taking a nap so early, but I did implement "Quiet Time" I told him he had to stay on his bed quietly for 30-45 minutes, but he didn't have to sleep. He was allowed to take a book or one toy. It gave him some much needed down time and me some quiet time.

Boys are very difficult sometimes, and so headstrong. He'll eat when he's hungry he is fighting for some control in his life, don't worry about it. Serve him what you are eating and tell him if he doesn't eat it you will heat it up for his snack. I know you're not a mean mommy, I felt that way sometimes, but he just wants to see how far he can push you. Stand your ground! You're doing great.

Wow - you just described my son exactly! My saving grace is that he absolutley LOVES strawberries and fruit cups. So I use them as dessert. He is starting to get the message that he has to make a decent attempt at eating his main course before he gets his fruit. He is 27 months old, so only just starting to understand, but I've been doing this for a few days now and he seems to know what I am saying even if he goes hungry sometimes. It is really a battle of wills. I also make sure he is offered something I know he likes. It does hurt me to see him not eat, but I know this will be best for him in the long run. I also would not use candy or anything unhealthy to tempt him with - only fruit.