Is It Normal That as an Adult from Childhood You Do Not like Kissing?

Updated on February 09, 2017
L.P. asks from West Bloomfield, MI
17 answers

what could of happened that an adult man does not kiss?

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D.D.

answers from Boston on

I think is might just be a personal preference. Like some people are huggers and others aren't. Some love to hold hands and other well not so much. Not everything comes from childhood trauma.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Why don't you ask the person you want to kiss?

I don't think describing something like 'liking kissing' is a normal/not normal thing. It's personal. Some people aren't huggers. I would never expect that there was some traumatic moment in their childhood which causes them not to like hugging. I just accept that this is not a way they want to show affection or have contact. I have other friends who are very friendly huggy-kissy types and I can say with some certainty that nothing weird happened to them in that vein in childhood either.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I would suggest better communication skills between you and the non kisser.

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M.G.

answers from Portland on

Who knows? If it were me, I would ask him.

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W.W.

answers from Washington DC on

Welcome to mamapedia!

There are many people that don't like "kissing". My sister is a pharmacist. So she knows the germs that are transferred. She RARELY kisses her boyfriend with an open mouth. When she's with her grandkids? She "puckers up" and makes sure she kisses them on the cheeks. RARELY ever on the lips.

Is this your husband or your boyfriend? Have you asked HIM why he doesn't like to kiss? That's where I would start.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Not everyone likes the same expressions of affection. That doesn't mean that anything is wrong with them or that they had some kind of trauma. Everyone likes what s/he likes.

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

A request has been made to this member to please consider editing this question so as to provide more relevant information and/or details -in order to get the best and most helpful response from other members.

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T.D.

answers from Springfield on

i hate kissing. i prefer not to. other peoples breath on me makes me cringe... saliva gives me the heebee jeebies. so i rarely if ever kiss.

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A.L.

answers from Atlanta on

Your post needs to include much more information for anyone to give you a helpful response. Are you talking about a friend, a husband, a relative? Why do you want to know whether his dislike of kissing is 'normal'? If you want responses, please amend your post.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Nope.
Not normal.
I have absolutely no idea why anyone would not like to kiss.
Maybe he kisses others but not you?
Seems to me that rather than spending time trying to figure him out (and maybe trying to 'fix' him?), just cut your losses and move on.
How exactly is this a parenting question?

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K.C.

answers from Anchorage on

How are we supposed to know? Ask him.

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S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

Not normal, but there could be lots of reasons. Perhaps this person is germ phobic? Afraid of getting or giving a cold sore? Maybe has issues with bad breath, or unable to tolerate the breath odours of other people?

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N.K.

answers from Miami on

I don't know, but why don't you just ask the adult why he does not like kissing? Is it always like that, or just in public? Not everyone likes public displays of affection, so that may be a reason. Perhaps this man, as a child, kissed a little girl in school and got in trouble for it so now he is averse to it, or he got a cold sore from someone, got bitten by someone while kissing...again, unless you ask, there is no way to know.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

If there is a root cause to this you would have to ask him, only he would know. But, just because someone does not like to kiss does not mean there was some kind of trauma, some people are huggers and others are not, it does not mean the "not huggers" were abused in some way. Just like some people are Asexual, they are not that way because of trauma, but just because that is how they are wired. Talk to him about it, and be sure to listen to what he says without judgement.

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C.C.

answers from New York on

Maybe he is saving his first kiss for a certain moment?

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L.U.

answers from Seattle on

I like to kiss my husband.
I do NOT like it when he tries to get his tongue in my mouth. ICK!! No french kissing for me. I truly find it repulsive.
I love him, he gets PLENTY of kisses in "other" areas, he is amazing. I can't stand kissing open mouthed.
Maybe your man feels the same way.

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N.P.

answers from Chicago on

I HATE kissing, always have, it feels slimy, wet, gross... it just is not exciting to me, does nothing for me, and that's any kind of kissing
I feel bad for my husband sometimes since I have never liked it we just really did it a few times when we were dating but that's it. I kiss him on the cheek, and he kisses me sometimes, and I put up with it, but it is not pleasurable to me.

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