Inviting Young Classmates over to Play . . .

ONce I met a mom and we hit it off I would allow my children to play there.
I have said to my kids that thye will not play in a certain house, call it bad vibes or whatever, the kids always played outside where I could see them.

We started letting them go play at so and so's at 4ish.
My 3rd could actually go over at 3 without me, my neighbor and I joked we should install a hamster tube between the houses the kids were between the houses so often.

Why are you worried about mom being there? I think that should be mom's choice if SHE feels comfortable leaving her child at your home. If you turned the tables around, would you feel comfortable leaving your child at her home? Probably not until you've established a good relationship with the other parent...and that could be a long while for some, if at all.

Well, you have to start somewhere, right?

The friends my son made in nursery and Pre-K are still some of his best buds in 3rd Grade and I still feel like those Pre-K moms are the next best thing to me being there!

You'll find a range of mom comfort levels. I've had moms let the kid out of the car in the driveway & wave as they pulled out....I've had moms come in and stay the entire time. I'm had moms come in chat & stay for 15 minutes, etc. Just depends on the mom. I would always ask about allergies, etc. to be on the safe side.

My DDs are 4 and 5 and we have playdates with the moms there and then once we know each other; it is either drop off or the moms hang out...depends. I think you absolutely don't have to wait till you're bffs with the other kids' moms at all. One kid in our neighborhood is with her dad on weekends. parents are divorced. He lives in a house with his brother. I've met him once. My daughters really want to go over her house to have a playdate. I said absolutely not. She can come to our house for a drop off playdate anytime. but not vice versa. A) I don't feel like hanging out there awkwardly in this dude's house and B) No WAY am I dropping my daughter's off in a single guy's house period. Even if I knew him I wouldn't. Except of course for my brother's house, who is a very wonderful uncle to the girls. But that is a unique scenario. We have plenty of drop off playdates! Have fun! I'd say start off with inviting them over for a playdate, talk to the other mom and if she comes to drop off, roll with it. If she comes to stay, roll with that.

My barely 4 year old b/g twins will play at the next-door neighbors and just my daughter across the street unattended, but the parents of both homes have assured me that they are okay with this. That said, I am very comfortable with these parents and am not concerned about the way my children would be treated there. I also know that the parents would let me know if it they weren't up to it or send them home if there was an issue.

Sounds like a good plan!

I would start off hanging out w/both the mom and kid(s). Invite them over on a regular basis. Sometimes it helps to invited 1 or 2 more moms. And yes, at that age, once you get comfortable with each other, it will be easy to leave your kids w/other people and vice versa. But 4/5 is a good age - they are more independent and can work out most play conflicts on their own.

I was thinking the same thing. I'd like to know the mom just a smidge first before having my daughter or son go over to their house. Good luck. We are going through the same thing here.

What we have done is to start by having playdates at the park. That is a really great way to kinda feel each other out. I especially prefer to do this because I know that not EVERY parent could handle my very busy boy, so I like to give them a preview (and to see how THEIR kids act too). If the park playdates go well, when the weather gets cooler I invite people to our home.

I have a 4 1/2 year old girl and right now I personally feel it is too young to go to a friends house alone unless it is a neighbor where she/he can come home at any time if she/he wants to. That's just my opinion.

This is a great idea!
Yes, invite mom and son over so the 2 of you can see how the boys play together, what each of your expectations are for the kids behaviors, how you each handle these situations.

Serve a snack that is what you would serve so she can see it is healthy.

And yes, give her a tour of the house so she can see that the house is safe.

Our daughter had little classmates come over once she started kinder, but we also had a neighborhood full of little kids so we all had each others children over all of the time before that,