I Would like to Stop Nursing My 1 1/2 Year Old!

Thank Goodness!!! Your little one sounds just like mine! I posted a request a few days ago and have gotten zero responses. I'm not quite ready to "force-wean" mine but it's so nice to know someone else has a child like this. My little guy has been sick with coughs and sniffles for the last three or so weeks! And with that has started nursing more than usual. But before that he would nurse at nap time and at bed time and then two to 5 times in the night! Mine says "Night night!" when he wants to nurse or "Around!" because he would say that to change breasts and now I guess it just means nursing to him! I always thought I would never nurse my child long enough for them to be able to call it something. But now that he is, I still feel like he's baby enough. I don't mind nursing him this long, it's the full night sleep that I would like both of us to get! I think to stop it now you will have to just NOT do it anymore. He'll cry and cry but eventually he'll fall asleep and after a few days, hopefully, he'll figure out it's not happening anymore. You might want to move into a guest room or something for a week, if you sleep with your baby. :) I've started telling my little guy he's getting too big and that "night night" is for babies. He doesn't really get it yet, but I'm hoping it will make sense to him soon. That's how I got my oldest off the pacifier. I kept telling him he was getting too big for them and soon they would break. Then gradually I just snipped the nipple off of them one at a time and told him he got too big and it broke. It worked perfectly. But I can't snip my own nipples off, now, can I!! Hope it helps to know you're not alone. OH, and a mom I know went on a trip for a few days when she was ready to stop nursing and she left the baby at home with Daddy. When she got back there wasn't any more milk anyway but she just said no when her daughter asked for it. But she told me she wishes she had let her daughter wean herself because now she's more needy and demanding as a child and maybe wouldn't be if she had been able to nurse a little longer.???? Who knows...do what you feel is best for your family. Whatever you do, I think it's going to be a rough few days, but he'll figure it out.I'll be thinking of you!

Hi C.! When my son was younger, he refused to take any bottle so we used the Adiri breast-bottle, which is shaped like a breast, and he could feel the warmth from it on his cheek as he drank from it. I also had my husband be the person to give it to him. What you'll need to do is to stop going to him in the middle of the night and only send your husband in (sometimes with the milk, other times with just a pat on the back). Once he realizes he's not getting the 'reward' for waking up so often, he'll eventually just sleep through. I don't recommend crying-it-out, as this is often even more disruptive, but I do highly recommend Elizabeth Pantley's "The No Cry Sleep Solution". I hope that helps! Take care.

Unfortunately, as you probably already know (having 6 kids), you're going to have to put up with your son being angry that nursing is being taken away from him. He will not be scarred for life. He will not remember this transition when he's older. Tell him that Mommy doesn't have any more milk for him because he's such a big boy. Pump periodically to help your breasts reduce production, but do it when he's not around. He's got to learn to put himself to sleep without you, or you'll really regret it later! Good luck.

LOL Sorry no advice here either...I am still nursing my 2 1/2 year old and I can't get her off me!!! You are not alone.

Hi C.,

How is his eating during the day? If he is eating well I would stop the night hursing all together. Here is what I suggest; first try not a sippy cup, but a straw cup with milk in it, then establish some sort of night time routine. For example with my daughter we would have some cereal(hot or cold) when I was weaning her, before she went to bed. This helped ease my mind because I new she had a full tummy. Then I put her in her bed and stay in the room with her, until she falls asleep. You cannot take him out of the crib, but you can comfort him by rubbing his back.
Also anytime he wants to nurse, you can maybe offer him something else, like a cup of milk.
I hope this helps

I just recently weaned my 17-mo old off night time nursing. DH and I thought this would be a first step before completely weaning her off. Before that, she would wake up 2-3, sometimes 4 times at night, and used nursing as a way to get her back to sleep whenever she woke up. We started by teaching her the difference between daylight and nighttime. Once she knows the difference, one night when she asked to nurse I told her that it's night time, everybody is sleeping, including nai-nai (the word she uses for nursing), and that she should sleep also. I gave her water in sippy-cup instead. She cried on and off between sleeps within a period of 2.5 hours the first night. I patted and stroked her back to comfort her during this time. The 2nd night she woke up once and cried for 10 min. Same procedure repeated. After that one time, she slept until morning. The next day she slept through the night and didn't ask to nurse again until 6:30 am. I was pleasantly surprised that it didn't take too long for her to get used to it. The crying was a painful in the beginning as we do not usually let her cry out. But she was comforted all through the process. In the end I think the result works better for both us parents and her in terms of getting better rest. Of course things work differently with each child, so you may have to customize each method for your child. Best of luck.

I nursed all three of my children for two years. But night nursing was always the first to go. Like your family, my children slept with me and would wake several times during the night. when they got old enough to understand this idea, usually between 15-18 months, i would implement it. i would tell them that we are not going to nurse anymore once the sun goes down. as soon as the sun comes up in the morning, we can nurse. and we can nurse all day long if they want. but when the sun goes down, no more nursey. i also tell them we can sing songs or tell stories if they wake up and we can cuddle, but no nursey. the first couple of nights are really hard and no one will get any sleep. but after that, like you said, everyone sleeps better. i think i also kind of prepared the child a few days ahead, that next week we will not be nursing at night anymore, and what a big boy you will be. i hope this helps.

Usually it takes your will power to just stop. Plan a reward at some given date. It is always harder on the mom than the child. Because you chose to go past the 1 year mark, which is when you should have weaned, it will take bribery, tricks, and tough love. Explain to the child that there is no more milk and here is your big person sippie cup or water bottle or whatever suits you. Make the mild warm for him the first few times. Curlie straws are always a hit. If all else fails, call on La Leche League mothers, pediatrician, or your hospital visiting nurses and see what they can recommend. Make a mark off calendar or re-use the Lego Advent calendar to mark the days. Lego stores all over still have them.

Hi C.,

I am a mother of five and my third child was born with a cleft lip and palate. In order to give her the best immune system for surgeries, I pumped breast milk for 14 months. During that time I discovered around the twelveth month of pumping that papaya enzymes dry up your milk. It was an accident but when I was ready to wean my subsequent children I took this. After a short span of frustration from my child because the milk was gone they took to the cup of milk much easier. It has worked for many of my friends as well. You can usually find papaya enzymes (used to help digestion) at a health food store. The other plus is that they do not harm your child or you in any way. It will take realistically two weeks for this process. I hope this helps. Another suggestion is at the height of their frustration take them on a trip to the baby store and have them pick out a new drinking cup just for milk. It may help the transition even more. Much sucess on your journey.
"Blessed is the man (and women) with many arrows in his(her) quiver" Proverbs in the Bible

If he is not ready to wean I would just let him nurse to sleep and not try to force the issue.
I am a 45 yr old Mother of 6 children. All 100% breastfed and all weaned when they were ready. Anywhere from 2 1/2 to past 5 years. So what if you have a five yr old at your breast to go to sleep? It's normal. All children have their own time to do things...wean, use the potty, etc...Forcing them to do something when they aren't ready creates problems.

I stopped nursing after 2 years and 3 months. My daughter would not drink milk nor did she take a bottle. It was not planned but it worked out well. It happend that I went out 2 nights in a row with girlfriends. After that I didn't look back. I had my husband put our daughter down for a week straight. If anything just get out of the house when your youngest is going to bed. I thought it would never happen. Good Luck!

I stopped nursing my son at the same age in order to get pregnant (Dr suggested this is why I was not ovulating at the time). It was a sad process, because I loved nursing him. We cut the number of nursing times over a period of three months until no more. Things that helped us... snuggle fully clothed, have Dad help with cup feedings, lots of affection like kisses and smiles. Most importantly, we made a big deal about sleeping in his own room and let him decorate it with stickers on the walls, pictures he drew and a new nightlight. Sent him to bed with ice water and a timy drop of OJ in it, because he likes oj in the mornings. Then, reinforced how terrific it was that he was in his own room and bed by praising and sometimes giving treats the next day. Make it fun, though breaking that routine will be frustrating for him at first. Kids bounce back quickly - you know that with your other kids!

Hi C., I completed weaning my daughter at age two. We did it through verbal communication. I told her that "booby" was running out and that it was time to start saying bye-bye. I would let her nurse for less and less periods of time (only a few minutes on each breast) and at longer intervals (6, 7, 8 hours between). As my milk supply decreased, she recognized that "booby" indeed was running out until it was "all gone." I approached it very matter of fact and so did she. We still snuggled and maintained our close relationship after weaning, and it was a very smooth transition.

My youngest son is very attached to the night nursing also (he is 13.5 months). My oldest (a 10 year old girl) nursed until I weaned her at 18 months, becasue I was pregnant with her brother (8 years old now). She was at that point only nursing morning and night. She still woke up at night, but I did not night nurse at night - we rocked and laid down together on a bed in her room. My second child weaned himself at 17 months and started sleeping through the night soon thereafter. I have been thinking about cutting back on night nursing, but I am 10 years older than when I had the first one and man, I have to get some sleep. I noticed that he is also wanting to learn how to use the toilet. He has a lot going on! Maybe he is mentally processing this new development and that is contributing to the night issues. I think it would be wise to take on one at a time, if possible (sometimes they don't let you do that). I would take on the potty training first. If your husband can help with the night issues, that would be great. I know that my baby needs to learn how to consistently go back to sleep without a boob in his mouth. By a lot of effort, we have gotten it to where my husband or I can put him to sleep at first, and we are working on getting him to go back to sleep some other way. This is going to take some time.

I told my daughter for a month that I was going to go out of town alone and that when I came home there wouldn't be any milk left in my boo boo's. I visited a friend for 5 days, drank an herbal tea mixture from Elephant Pharm to reduce my milk production, and enjoyed myself. She continued to ask for 2 weeks but we used a sippy cup of milk instead. good luck

I would just do one thing at a time. When I was trying to wean my son who also slept with us I figured out it wasn't a good idea to wean him and try to get him to sleep on his own at the same time - too many changes and stresses. For my own son, when I weaned him instead of nursing to put him to bed like I usually did I just took him for a car ride until he fell asleep and then put him in bed with us since he was already sleeping with us. I did the car rides for about 2 weeks until he moved on and forgot about nursing. I know this was tricky, but then I didn't have to have all of the stress and crying and guilty feelings of just saying no. For another idea I had a friend who put band-aids over her nipples and showed them to her son and said they were hurt and didn't work anymore and that connected with him and he forgot about it. Hope one of these ideas helps.

The magic number is 3. For 3 nights. I weaned my boy at nearly 2 years old. I wanted him to self-wean, but clearly that was never going to happen. He was still nursing once in the middle of the night (as well as all throughout the day). What we did to get rid of the nighttime feedings was to let him cry for about 30 minutes before I went to feed him. At the end of 30 minutes, he did get fed, but after 3 nights of that, I guess he thought it just wasn't worth it! He never again woke up in the middle of the night to breast feed! So, try waiting for as long as you can (he may even fall asleep again) before you go to feed him at night. If you wait every night, he will probably give up and go back to sleep after several nights of this. Good luck!

My opinion.... do it slowly. Only offer it before he goes to sleep and once at night... then a week later, just before he goes to bed.... then slowly decrease the length of the nursing session before bed. Offer milk in the cup during the day. It will be hard to do and he will not like it. Good Luck !

I just weaned my 15 month old daughter last week so this is fresh in my mind. She was also a big fan of nursing at night and what I ended up doing was for a week only allowing her to nurse once at night and the other times she would cry out I made my husband deal with her (that way she wouldn't be expecting to nurse). After a week of this (yes it was hard, she cried alot) - she got the picture and we were down to one feeding a night. After that week I cut her down to just two feedings a day and ramped up the amount of cow's milk I was giving her. The third week I cut her off all together. One thing that worked well is that I started by week two to do a new morning routine - a cup of milk, a banana, and a book. She came to expect that rather than nursing. We had our ups and downs but we made it through. Good luck!

Hi C.-
I was looking forward to reading responses to your request since I also have an 18 month old son, Joey, who loves to nurse at night. Last night he went to sleep on his own without nursing which was encouraging. We have been trying a bedtime routine: dinner, bath, nursing, reading/story, snack, brush teeth, bed. I think it is working to move the nursing to after his bath and the snack may be filling him up so that he can fall asleep without nursing. He only woke up once last night to nurse...so we may be headed it the right direction toward weaning him. I don't want to force him before he is ready as we have had a lot of changes in our lives: we moved, changed daycare, I started a new job, and we have had lots of house guests. I try hard to keep a routine for him to help him with all of the changes. Are you able to keep a routine with all of you children? We only have one, so I can't imagine how you do it with six! It sounds like you are having fun. If I was younger, I would have six also. My husband and I had our first baby in our 40s! He was a wonderful surprise and we are so happy.
Good luck and please let me know what you learn!
Thanks,
C.
P.S. Joey drinks goat's milk all day long and likes it. Have you tried goat's milk?

I have to agree with a previous moms advice that 3 is the magic number. Somehow after the third day, my 16 month old was fine with no longer nursing. I know there is a big difference between 20 months and 16 months but I don't think you will have anymore of a challenge than I did. I just offered him water in a sippy cup and let him cry for a few nights.
My son didn't like milk at all for about 6 months after we weaned. We tried everything we could think of to coax him into drinking milk, straws, fun cups, changing tempurature, adding ovaltine, he just refused. It wasn't until he was over 2 and we offered 2% that he began drinking it. So I know what you are going through with that.
One thing a friend of mine did when she weaned her three year old was to nurse only at nap. Her daughter had a hard time giving up the night sessions but the promise of any nursing at all made it easier for the little one to handle. When she finally stopped altogether it was a battle during the day rather than at night, which we all know is hard enough already.