Happy Mother's Day, Dad!

Updated on May 02, 2013
G.S. asks from Hopatcong, NJ
9 answers

Fifteen years ago we lost my mom. Since that day my dad has done his best to be all he could to me and my girls. My oldest was born just 3 weeks after we buried my mom and after my mom died, he took the locket he gave to my mom and asked me to keep it for my little girl. My dad has attended tea parties, ballet recitals, you name it, he's done it all. Although Mother's Day is a hard day for me to get through, it is not such a hard thing. I think my dad was caught off guard the first time I wished him a Happy Mother's Day, I don't do anything out of the norm for him, but I do acknowledge him because after all, he has played the role of both parents and I am very proud to be his daughter :) Is it wrong that I still consider him a mom still. Considering he is the one that I still run to like a mom when all of my friends call their mothers when they celebrate their children's milestones, or their hardships, I don't see any harm in me feeling this way about him, do you? Again, I don't send gifts or cards, I do realize there is Grandparent's Day, but that is not what this is about. This is between him & I.

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So What Happened?

I thank you all for your kind words, as it means a lot. As far as those of you have who have lost a mom as well, it is a very difficult thing to do. That first everything is hard, just as the second the third, every one thereafter. The only advice I can offer is to keep their memory alive and to do the things you'd rather not for your children. Christmas has always been the hardest for me, maybe because it was my mom's most favorite, I had our tree up and down w/in two days at times, however this year it was up about two weeks and both of my girls loved it. I still, after 15 years have my mother's Chanel #9 on my dresser and every now and then I open the cap, close my eyes, smell it and and give myself a hug from her. The ache will never go away, but it does lessen and although my girls never met her, they have so much of her in each one of them. I wish each one of you a very Happy Mother's Day :)

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Awe so sweet. You are so luck to have such a sweet, loving Dad. Sounds like he would let the girls put make up on him too.

3 moms found this helpful

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M.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

Here's a question for you for this post. How are you planning to spend Mother's Day if your mother is no longer here with you or you can't be with her? My mom died in October so I am dreading this first Mother's Day without her even though I am 49 years old and my kids are teenagers. My mom was an only child and left behind her mother, who will be 91 in a couple of weeks. She is still very alert although just had a health scare recently and is getting weaker. We will go out on Saturday night with my MIL and we will spend Sunday, Mother's Day, with my grandma. My husband will probably get me flowers and carry-out. Thank you for sharing your story and Happy "Mother's Day" to all of the dads, grandparents, etc. who have stepped into a mother's shoes.

5 moms found this helpful

X.O.

answers from Chicago on

That's really beautiful! Thank you for sharing your story.

5 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

This is great, but they will pull this if you do not add a question.

4 moms found this helpful
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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

That is very sweet of you!!

3 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

aaaawww!!! I got choked up!! How wonderful!!!

I'm sorry for your loss!! It is sooo great to hear of a man stepping up like that!!!

3 moms found this helpful

P.L.

answers from Washington DC on

Thats so great he plays the role of mom too! I'm sorry to hear about your mom passing, though.
I think even Hallmark has cards for dads on morhers day.
Pammy

3 moms found this helpful
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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

My MIL used to send my DH "mother's day" cards when he was running the ship by himself. Now I get them, but he thought it was quirky and cute that people wished him a happy mother's day.

2 moms found this helpful

L.B.

answers from New Orleans on

I don't understand your question.

I get that he is a great grandfather - but you don't need to do anything for him for Mother's Day anymore - he is not mothering your children - he is being a grandparent - as he should be. He never "mothered you" really, since you were an adult, starting your own family, when she passed.

Look, my Mom died when I was 13 and my sister 15 - so our Dad really did have to single parent us. I get that you miss your Mom - the loss of a parent is horrible at any age, but your Dad did not wind up raising you and putting his life on hold to finish raising you alone. So it is time to stop the Mother's day cards to Dad and focus on Grandparent's day for him. How awkward for him to still be receiving Mothers Day cards from you. Let him begin traditions of celebration with his Grandchildren that center on his being a Grandparent.

My sister and I stopped with the Mothers Day cards to our Dad before we were out of our teens and I never thought once to "honor" him on Mothers Day after I had a child and he became a Grandparent.

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