Grief - Arlington,TX

I'm so sorry for your loss.
Grief is a funny thing. Each person grieves in their own way. It comes in waves. Some days you'll be fine and then you just won't. Get a therapist or a support group to help you.
Let the grieving happen whenever and wherever it does.
Let people help you when you need it.
Hugs,
LBC

Saw this on the news, I have been praying for your family... are there any physical needs I could help with?

Hospitals have grief groups to help in this situation. Just call around until you find one. I've gone to 2 different groups at a hospital here. One taught about the stages of grief, what to expect, and ways of dealing with it. The other was purely a support group. Each of us talked about whatever we wanted to talk about.

I also suggest that you get a book on grief so that you'll understand the process and know better what to expect. If you find a group that teaches they will refer you to books.

My cousin died mid March. I spent he first few weeks wondering why I wasn't upset, wasn't crying, didn't feel much differently than I usually do. Then, mid May, I realize, "hey, he really isn't coming back." I realized that even tho I didn't feel numb I was in a numb sort of stage. A part of me was unconsciously refusing to admit that this was permanent.

I urge you to get grief counseling. It will help you to have someone who isn't going thru grief to talk with.

I cannot imagine dealing with the death of my child at any age but at 2; that seems even more painful if that's possible. I suggest that you may want to also talk with your doctor before this really hits home and feels overwhelming. There is medication to help take the edge off so that you can deal with the pain. Taking something short term, only once you're feeling out of control, can be very helpful. You don't want to get rid of the pain. The goal is to reduce the pain enough that you can think as well as feel.

Know that you may reach the stage during which you will want to cry all of the time. That is OK. Let yourself grieve in any way that comes to you.

I am so sorry for your loss. Please reach out to a grief counselor and support groups.

I am truly sorry for your loss. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

You need to find a licensed therapist to talk with and work with him/her to get through this. You need to call your primary care physician TODAY and get the ball rolling on this....not just for you - but your whole family.

I cannot imagine what you are going through. I know it must be painful, mind-numbing painful.

Please call your doctor today and have them help you find a therapist.
You are in my thoughts and prayers. I am truly sorry for your loss!!

I am so sad and so sorry for you J..

Please don't be afraid to reach out to people, so when it does hit, you won't be alone.

I pray your family be patient and honest with each other more than ever in the coming days/months.

Peace and prayers to you. And get off Mamapedia. Reading other questions and answers might only make you really angry later on.

Find a really good therapist. When this does sink in, it's going to be overwhelming and paralyzing. The best way to get through this is to get help and let yourself grieve.

To say that I am sorry for your loss is such an understatement. My heart breaks for your and for your family. You will get through this and you will find happiness again, but your life will never be the same.

I hope that you find peace in the coming months. Reach out to anyone who is offering help and support.

J., I feel like any words I could come up with to comfort you will sound pathetic compared to the endless journey you are embarking on.

I wish I could just come sit with you.

I send you great strength and positive vibes cuz that's all I've got.

I have no words.. I am just so sorry.

My heart aches on behalf of you and your family. I am so sorry for your loss and the grief you bear. Please don't hesitate to find someone to help you through your grief: a psychologist, grief councilor, minister/priest, support group, etc. (If I find any specific groups that can help you I will PM you.) You in my thoughts and prayers.

There are no rules. Just work through whatever feelings come your way. Seek help to talk with counsellors, family, friends or a spiritual leader such as your priest or pastor. Find solace in remembering and talking, and in your Faith, if you are lucky enough to have it.

My thoughts, prayers and love are with you and your family.

When you need it ask for help. Don't try and go through this alone. Reach out. A support group for grief, spiritual group, friends, family....whatever. If you are married keep in mind that men often have problems sharing their grief and everyone grieves differently. Whatever you feel..... it's okay. Be understanding of others and ask for understanding in return. Be kind to yourself. There is no right way to feel.

I am so sorry for your loss. What do you do? Take one day at a time.

There are no words J.. I am just so so sorry this happened.
Different circumstances but my son passed away too. You have a long road ahead of you. Be kind to yourself. <hugs>

I am so sorry - how terrible. I don't even know what to say!

I think you need to get as much help and support around you as possible.

Thinking of you and praying for you.

J.,
I don't really have any advice for you but I want to send you hugs. My heart is breaking for you and your family. I am so sorry for your loss. Our family will pray for yours. Please let us know what, if anything, we can do for you.
Lots of hugs and prayers,
A.

I have never had trauma like this. I urge you to reach out for help. You are in shock. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry.

I am so sorry.

Call around to big churches. They have grief counselors or classes. I know the big North Hills church of Christ in North Richland Hills has them but I bet there is one closer to you.

I am very sorry for your loss of your daughter and the trauma that your family is going through. I read about it in the local paper and have prayed for your family. There is no quick fix for this. You are still in shock. Please find a counselor to help you gent through the next few weeks and then long term counseling. Surround yourself with people that can help care for you and your family. Do you belong to a supportive church --let them help you. In Ft. Worth there is a special non profit organization called The Warm Place ###-###-####). They provide grief counseling to children who have lost a loved one. Please call them, your whole family needs support.
You won't ever get over this, but you will eventually find a new normal. I will keep praying for comfort for you and your family.

I am deeply sorry for the loss of your little girl. I won't tell you about people I have lost, it wouldn't comfort you. Just let your pain flow, cry and pray.Only time, family and closest friends will give you peace and will walk with you through it. This is a huge process, unfortunately you have to live it. I am sorry again.
"We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey." (Kenji Miyazawa)

J.,
I am so sorry. I know that doesn't help, but honestly no words do. In a couple of weeks it will be 6 yrs since I lost my daughter. First of all WHATEVER you are feeling is normal. 2nd, you aren't alone. It isn't a take it one day at a time thing, especially in the beginning. It's a take it one min at a time. There is alot of support out there. Find something you are comfortable with. Someone mentioned Compassionate friends. It's a great group. It wasn't right for me, but that had alot to do with the circumstances of my daughers death. I found an online support group that I love. It is a yahoo group called Angelmoms2. You are welcome to participate as much or as little as you feel like. Sometimes it helps to just read what others are posting. I live in Ft Worth, but work in Arlington. I'd be glad to give you my number or meet someplace if you think it would help.
Huge (((HUGS))) to you and your family
C.

J., I'm so very sorry. None of us can even imagine what you are going through. You have so much ahead of you. Right now you are trying to work with the people who are taking care of your daughter. You are working with those who will help you with your property. Lots of paperwork and responsibilities. Hopefully you have people around you to help.

When you get through the funeral and find a place to stay, that's when the gravity of it will hit. I hope you won't be alone. I hope you have people around you who will help you through it.

I hope that you will get grief counseling. You can talk to the social worker at the hospital. They are eager to recommend someone to you.

Hugs and prayers your way, J..

I lost a fiance 8 years ago, not a child (thank goodness), but my emotions were just about on track with yours at this point...the first stage of grief is denial, which is often manifested as shock in the very early stages. I can't imagine what you are going through at this point, but nobody really can, because everyone handles grief differently.
There are 3 things that you can do immediately to help prepare yourself to deal with this once you progress through this stage:
1) grief counseling (as someone mentioned)
2) find a local support group and call them ASAP...even if you are a very introverted person and don't wish to do a lot of talking, being around people who have had a similar loss will help.
3) Talk to your family MD/ psychiatrist to see about medication. I know a lot of people may disagree with this, but you might need an "as needed" anti-anxiety med (such as xanax or ativan) to get you through the initial grieving. And if you have other children, you still need to be able to function and be there for them.

It will take a long time to heal from this and you have quite a road ahead of you. You and your family need as much support as you can possibly get right now. Will keep you in my thoughts. <3

Oh my gosh I am so sorry!! My prayers are with you and your family! You may not ever know WHY this happened. Please have faith in God that He has a plan for you. This is one of my favorite scriptures:
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11. Please know that I will never forget about this, and for the rest of my life, as this pops into my head, I will again say a prayer for peace, comfort, and healing for you. I am so, so sorry. God Bless.

Oh my GOODNESS J.!!

FIRST I would like to say that having the courage to even come here and post (with all you are experiencing) shows "extraordinary" strength!!

I am SO EXTREMELY SORRY for the loss of your 2 year old Little Girl. I am sure everyone here will tell you to get to a Grief Counselor ASAP. I am SURE you are in shock, and your feelings are absolutely valid.

I'm SOOOO HURT to hear this story this morning. Lean on your Family for Support, as well as your Faith. I have lost a Loved one, and I wish I could "sugar coat" it, but you never get over the loss. It may get "easier" with time, but to be 100% honest, you never get over it.

Wishing you the best....

Please Take care!!

I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you. I lost my mom a couple of months ago, and I am still grieving. I have always thought that the grief most difficult to bear would be the loss of a child.

My friend recommended that I sign up for Grief Share emails. There is one a day, and I've benefitted from some of the wisdom there. Try to find a church that offers some grief counseling. Be gentle with yourself. I will pray for you personally, that you will find the strength and resilience to overcome this great loss, and that you will have great gain in the loss somehow, some day.

Sincerely,
K.

J.,

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious child. You're gonna need support. People rallying around you that are willing to let you feel how you feel without condemning you or trying to make you believe you shouldn't be hurting. A good church and a good grief support group with others who are having a similar trauma would be good things. Don't seclude yourself, you need others. Allow the rest of the family to discuss with each other how they are hurting. Shutting away the pain would in time destroy relationships. Encourage them to find support outside of the family as well.

I can't even imagine.....I'm so very sorry. I have always believed that when it comes to grief and loss...there's only room for two...because grief is so overwhelming and consuming that there isn't room for anything or anyone else. I've been there. I had to just let it overtake me, I had to let it tear me down completely, I couldn't try to run from it. It hurt like hell and I will never forget it.
Allow yourself every single minute you need to grieve the loss of your baby. There is no time limit for grief. It takes however long it takes. Get support somehow, try not to go thru this alone.
Again, I'm so sorry...:(

I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my prayers.

I'm so, so sorry. There is no right way to through this kind of loss and it's different for each person. Take things day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute. Lean on those you love and let them take care of you right now. I really am so sorry.

My church in Dallas, Wilshire, also has a program to help with the process of grief.
http://www.wilshirebc.org/care/grief-and-loss-center/

My heart breaks for you. Please know that whatever you feel it is okay. There is no such thing as a wrong feeling. Find people to be with you in this process and know that people struggle with what to say in the face of such tragedy. We will probably say the wrong thing, and I am sorry. Lord, have mercy.

So sorry for your loss. May God be with you in your time of need! Prayers for you and your family.

I will be praying for you and your family continually. Big hugs to you I know God can walk you through all of the pain. I know many have been touched and helped by several books out there such as "Heaven is for real" where they have had actual encounters with Heaven and angels. When the tornado passed through Moore, OK I was filled with such grief and sorrow for the parents that all I could do was cry and I asked God to show me something, anything to help me deal and he showed me a vision of the children rising out of the rubble as angels and ascending into heaven. After that I had such indescribable peace and was able to move on. Ask the Lord to show you and speak to you. The bible says he is closest to the broken hearted. Peace and Blessings to you and your entire family. Do seek out other people that can walk through this with you. Support Group, Pastor.

Call the Compassionate Friends at ###-###-####. It is a support group of parents like you who have lost a child. It was a tremendous support to me when I lost my child to talk to parents who have been through the same grief and heartache. .
I am so sorry for your loss I know your heart is broken nothing hurts more then the loss of this precious angel. My prayers, thoughts and tiers are with you.