72 answers

Expecting Our First Baby, Need ALL Sorts of Help!

My husband and I are expecting our first baby at the end of January. I just feel at lost for what to expect about anything and everything. We are so exciting about our baby, especially after trying for a while to get pregnant. I know there are so many moms out there with great pieces of advice, especially based off their own experience. Any advice or tips or suggestions for a first time mom to be would be greatly appreciated. Advice on how to prepare, what to expect, supplies or things I will for sure need vs things that are truly a waste of $$, when to have a baby shower (my pregnancy is considered slightly high risk), tips on what to have ready in the home before the baby gets home to make for smooth transition, what I need to have for the baby at the hospital???? Any help will be so greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance. Thank you, Thank you!

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Thank you all so very much for the helpful advice. I know that it is not possible to be completely prepared for the baby before arrival, but I definitely feel better about the whole thing. Thank you all for being so caring and thoughtful to be willing to share all your advice with me. I will continue to breathe and try to relax, but at least I know at little more about what to expect, thank you all again.

Featured Answers

K., you've gotten tons of great advice although I didn't read them all. One thing someone told me that was excellent advice is to hang up all the baby clothes. That way you can easily see what you have. If they are in the drawer the baby will have outgrown the outfits before you know it. In fact, put them in the closet by size and you'll make more use of what you have. Also buy some Dreft detergent to wash the baby's clothes in. Regular detergent can irritate the baby. I used it for about 6 months for each of my kids. One last piece of advice......listen to everyone's advice and then do whatever you think is best. You will know best, even if you think you don't. Good luck!

Congrats! The best book ever is Baby 411! I carried it everywhere when my little guy was tiny. I even recently bought the Toddler 411! Two other things I couldn't have lived without were the cradel swing and the velcro swaddles! Oh another wonderful DVD was THE HAPPIEST BABY ON THE BLOCK. My boy cried a lot and this gave us tips that really worked! Good luck and enjoy.

Costco (kirkland brand) diapers are great (made by huggies, i think), they don't make a newborn size, they start at size 1-2... Costco (kirkland brand) wipes are great too!
Good luck

More Answers

Congratulations!!! You are embarking on a journey for which you can in no way can prepare. I cannot emphasize the impact that this little squirmy thing will have on your life, and it is different for everyone, but the same for all of us, somehow.

We were told before our first about all of the things that we just "HAD to have" because they were so useful and we used most of them one time. With our second child, we had moved and downsized and gotten rid of most of the stuff, and we were just as happy getting her through baby-hood with almost nothing.

So my advice to you is to enjoy these last moments of being a grown up - go to movies, make a list of your favorite restaurants and go to all of them, Just be carefree, and not worry about anyone else for another month.

Enjoy and congratulations again

K.,
Congrats! Babies are a lot of effort but worth every second of it! I have 2 a 8 year old and an 11 month old. The things I think are a waste of money are nursing pillows (I have bought 2 and used each one twice) regular pillows work great and you don't waste time putting them on and off. Wipe warmers, and such I would suggest waiting until after you have had the baby for a few weeks to see if you feel you could actually use these. The one thing I would highly suggest getting is a baby bjorn. It is worth the investment and will help so you can keep the baby near and be able to do things that require 2 hands (you would be surprised) they are so worth the money! Sleepers are great and a couple of cute outfits but the sleepers are easy to get them in and out of as you will change the little one several times a day at first (spit up poop and pee) Those beautiful outfits are great for showing baby off and for pictures but a pain to get them in and out of. I would also recommend diapers.com fast delivery competitive prices (on diapers only, I am all about finding what you need at the lowest price even if it is name brand. Pampers diaper rock and I hardly have any issues with rashes with them) Cloth diapers are great for burp rags and you can dye them pink or blue if you feel the need. Swings are a big investment and you baby may or may not like it. See if you can try one out if you have a friend with a baby or buy a gently used one in case your baby doesn't like them (I spent $140 and my baby hardly used it and is now grown out of it. Everybody is different but hopefully some of this helps you.

First of all CONGRATULATIONS!! I hope you are feeling well as this is truly the most magical time of your life. Enjoy being pregnant and feeling that little baby inside of you. I miss the those big kicks!

There is too much information to give your here, so I will condense it!
*Get connected with a supportive community now! This is especially important after baby comes and you don't know where to go!

*Look into a birthing class right away and a good Pregnancy book. I recommend Bradley Method or Hypno Babies as their success rates are higher than regular Lamaze or hospital birthing classes. Ina May Gaskins Guide to Natural Childbirth book is a must and will not only give you birth stories but actual statistics on how we birth here in America.

*Rent the Business of Being Born from Netflix. It will blow your mind and think hard about the type of birth you want!

*Sign up for a Yoga class as it is truly the ONLY exercise class that not only prepares your body to birth, but teaches you how to breathe properly. It is our breath that births the baby. Remember that.

*Take a breast-feeding class NOW! This will help you tremendously when your baby is in your arms!

*Eat as much fresh, organic, un-processed foods as possible. This is not only for your health but for the health of your baby as well.

*Get a MOBY wrap to wear your baby as soon as baby is born! This will save your life and give you 2 extra arms to do things. It is THE most comfortable, non-stuctured carrier on the market.

*Consider cloth diapering. It can save you up to $2,000! Enough said.

*You don't need that much for the baby, so don't get overwhelmed with STUFF! They are mostly in onesies and long P.J.'s and don't need toys until closer to 6 months (teethers actually). Go to www.healthychild.org to get important information on how to raise your baby non-toxic. Do not use commercial products on baby's skin! I recommend Weleda or Earth Mama Angel Baby. Please get Dr. Feders Book, Natural Baby Childcare. Hands down the best baby book on the market!

I had an amazing home birth with my second boy and he weighed in at almost 11 lbs! It was an easy, fun, joyful birth. although I know not everyone is comfortable with home birth, I do feel women have more enjoyable hospital births when they are empowered! Do your homework now. It is well worth it.

Please visit my website, www.bellysprout.com, to read more articles about everything from pregnancy through motherhood. Belly Sprout is an actual store in Fullerton and we not only carry products like baby carriers, cloth diapers, non-toxic toys, skincare and makeup, we have a packed calendar of classes, workshops and events. We are THE hub for all things related to natural mothering!

Feel free to ask me any questions! I LOVE pregnant mamas!

Oh! You should come to our Red Tent event on November 14th. This is where we gather under an actual tent in the store and share our birth stories. Pregnant moms are welcome and it is such a lovely experience! The mamas LOVE it!

Take care!
www.bellysprout.com
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I teach Supported Birth birthing classes and am a labor/postpartum doula. Contact me if you are interested in learning more about classes.
www.supportedbirthclass
relax and trust in yourself
L.

It's always in hindsight where we, moms, are like, "Gezz, we really didn't need all this STUFF." But as a first timer and since you and your hubby waited some before having this baby, the excitement is intense. I am certain that family and friends will shower you with all kinds of "stuff". I would like you to check out my blog regarding the issue of blessing the expecting mother. It refers to blessing the mom without gifts. So, once you have the practical side down with cribs and such, it's nice to "honor" and prepare the expecting mother by blessing her with encouragement, support and love. Please go to www.thecedarreader.wordpress.com. Also, I have a personal website if you get the chance to check that out too www.cedarbirthservices.com Congratulations and good luck to you!!!

The best advice I got about having a baby is Don't Be Quiet During Naptime. Get the baby used to noise so s/he can go to sleep anywhere and you don't have to tiptoe around. We purposely stayed at the same volume when the baby slept and it worked. The biggest mistake I made was not making a schedule for feeding and sleeping and sticking to it. Now we're trying to set one up and it's harder. Check out Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby.

Hi K.,

The best advice I ever got as a new mom was from my pediatrician on how to get baby to sleep through the night. My doc said that babies don't sleep through the night for two basic reasons: they're hungry and they're not tired. Consequently, she encouraged me to feed baby every two to three hours from the time I wanted him to wake up in the morning (about 6am for us) until the time we wanted him to go to bed (about 7-8pm for us)...even if we had to wake him up from a nap to do this. By doing this, my doc said, we would make sure baby was well fed and would never sleep long enough to drop into a deep sleep. It seems nursing is tough work for newborns! She also said that once baby hits bout 12 pounds, baby no longer needs the nighttime calories.

Being young and new at the mom thing, I followed her directions to the letter. By six weeks, my son was 15 pounds (he was 9 pounds at birth, so we had a head start) and sleeping through the night. I thought this was just beginner's luck, but it worked exactly the same for my second son. I was a true believer after that.

As for things you need, I was at a baby shower recently and I was stunned at all the gadgets that were out there for babies. I managed just fine on a baby swing, a bouncer, a car seat and a simple (very simple, one click-up-and-one-click-down) stroller. I just about died laughing when the mom-to-be, in all seriousness, tried to explain to me why a diaper wipe warmer was essential to baby sleeping through the night. But, I'm a simple person and have never been caught up in the materialsim that some people mistake for good parenting.

Good luck, relax and have fun!

K., you've gotten tons of great advice although I didn't read them all. One thing someone told me that was excellent advice is to hang up all the baby clothes. That way you can easily see what you have. If they are in the drawer the baby will have outgrown the outfits before you know it. In fact, put them in the closet by size and you'll make more use of what you have. Also buy some Dreft detergent to wash the baby's clothes in. Regular detergent can irritate the baby. I used it for about 6 months for each of my kids. One last piece of advice......listen to everyone's advice and then do whatever you think is best. You will know best, even if you think you don't. Good luck!

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