21 answers

Ever Feel like Chopped Liver?

I posted a question about my husband wanting to give his long lost friend money for their wedding and it was high to me. We agreed upon an amount but it got me thinking....

My husband was willing to drop over $200 on a long lost friend and he has not gotten ME a thing in years. Not for Christmas, Valentines Day, My birthday, Our Anniversary! Nothing zip, ziltch... nada! I didnt include mothers day cause Im not his mother right? I shouldnt expect anything, right?

Does your hubby do this?

I gave him a gift for Christmas and I gave him just a card for his birthday because I got nothing from him for Christmas or Valentines day and no surprise nothing for my birthday.

Feeling like chopped liver... lol

1 mom found this helpful

What can I do next?

Featured Answers

In all seriousness, it's not funny. If he ignores you on special occasions and it's not agreed that you don't want or need the recognition, then dropping $200 on anybody else is rude and a slap in the face. There's something wrong here if he thinks his wife doesn't need anything, ever, and you feel shafted.

3 moms found this helpful

I am so sorry. Yes, this has happened to me, probably because I never can answer his question about what I want. I really do wish I could make up my mind and then I wish he could read it. :)

But please know that you made my day. I haven't heard the expression "chopped liver" for years, and it reminds of my Mom and Grandmother. Thank you!

2 moms found this helpful

More Answers

We too have slipped into the "it's money from the common pot anyway, so we don't need a special holiday to buy what we want".

From the male perspective - love it. Maybe not male, per say, but from the non-gift-giving among us. Don't get me wrong, I love getting something special for her, and she for me. But every year - four times per year (valentine, bday, xmas, mom's day)

If we stay married 20 years that's 80 friggin' "special" and "meaningful" gifts.

That's ALOT of pressure on a guy!

:)

4 moms found this helpful

In all seriousness, it's not funny. If he ignores you on special occasions and it's not agreed that you don't want or need the recognition, then dropping $200 on anybody else is rude and a slap in the face. There's something wrong here if he thinks his wife doesn't need anything, ever, and you feel shafted.

3 moms found this helpful

I would ask him why he doesn't get you gifts (if you haven't already). Some people don't really care to receive them - and maybe (just maybe) he's one of them, so giving them doesn't really rate high on a priority list for him. It does seem odd to me, but I would flat out ask him what is going on?

2 moms found this helpful

Well, my husband is bad at gift giving. He's right on track with Dad On Purpose - it's all from the same pot, and what do I really like anyway? He's just not going to buy me jewelery 4x per year.

BUT, if he makes no effort for me (and I don't care what it is as long as it's a thoughtful effort) then I assume he wants me to do something special for myself and I usually get a spa treatment or new purse or something :)

If you don't get what you want, you take it :)

2 moms found this helpful

Apparently he believes he's your gift that keeps on giving.
Men are so unaware sometimes.
Tell him tonight if he wants some "liver pate'" it's gonna cost him ;)

2 moms found this helpful

my hubby is also a crappy gift giver. i started telling him what i wanted and he has done better. (or even picking it out online, showing him, and getting it myself!)

yes, i'd feel like poo in your shoes. tell him that. it's pretty crappy that he's willing to throw down $200 on a long lost friend but can't spend $20 to get his wife a bouquet of flowers for her birthday. and then start showing him things you want and telling him, "this is what i want for christmas babe." that's what i had to do, it takes a lot of the hurt feelings out of it.

2 moms found this helpful

I am so sorry. Yes, this has happened to me, probably because I never can answer his question about what I want. I really do wish I could make up my mind and then I wish he could read it. :)

But please know that you made my day. I haven't heard the expression "chopped liver" for years, and it reminds of my Mom and Grandmother. Thank you!

2 moms found this helpful

Giving money is easy for guys, they don't have to go shopping or worry that the recipient won't like what they picked out.

If you want something, ask. Be general or be specific, or what the heck, take him shopping and point. I do this with my sons. This way, they buy me something I really want but is a small luxury I'd otherwise do without. We go home and they wrap it. I have a terrible memory and am surprised when I open it. And we are all happy.

2 moms found this helpful

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