Craving Adult Interaction!!!!

Updated on September 16, 2010
J.S. asks from Saint Paul, MN
17 answers

Hi,

My husband is gone on day 7 of a 10 day work trip. I rarely get to speak with him because he is super busy, and his schedule isn't jiving to call daily. Monday was our anniversary :( I'm starting to get a little batty here with the 3 kids!

My oldest is in 1/2 day Kindergarten, middle one is in preschool and youngest is home full time. We moved a year ago, and I am struggling to find new Mom friends in the area to chat with. I did join the preschool parents group, and may try to join the PTA, but kind of want to wait a few months into the school year and then go to a few meetings.

Anyway, what do all you SAHM's with traveling husbands do to get some adult time? We can't afford a gym, and there are no mom's in my neighborhood to walk with (I walk everyday and never see anyone home or out). Before we moved I had a good friend down the street that I walked with most days, and when my husband (or her husband) had crazy work schedules, we traded dinners at each other's houses for some adult time and playdates for the kids.

How do I "replace" her? I can't find anyone home to chat with!

By the time the kids are down at night, I'm really done and not up for socializing on the phone with my other girlfriends... we do get together like once a month or every 6 weeks, but on a 10 day stretch, I'm dying for some conversation!

Thank goodness for Mamapedia. :)

Let me know what you all do to meet people.

Jessica

1 mom found this helpful

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M.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Meetup.com is great at finding really good, active moms groups. The one I belong to in Minneapolis has fun weekly activities and mom's night out events. Once you find a good group you'll wish you had found them sooner. Makes staying home so much easier. Good luck!

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M.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi Jessica!

I just moved to Minnetonka in March & am in the same boat as you. All my neighbors are super friendly but keep to themselves or go to a lake home, cabin so my almost 3 year old (only child) daughter is so loney & bored here. We moved from St Louis where everyone was out & interested in meeting new people & we were in tons of playgroups, so I am also in need of a playgroup too. I even posted on Mamasource, like you but never heard back from anyone:( I've tried meetup.com but haven't had much luck. I've been to malls & playgrounds but we're always the only ones speaking English or meet lovely people but no one extends an offer to do anything despite me stating directly that I'm new & interested in making friends/playgroup! It's so sad & I've lived in 3 states & made tons of friends right away. I've heard MN is a hard place to make friends, which is strange since everyone is so nice. I'd totally meet up with you. We can drink coffee & commiserate over how good we had it in our last city. Even if we just hung out at my house or yours, it's good for kids to play with other kids & for the mom's to be around other adults. Plus, I make a pretty mean banana bread too. Just send me a private message if you're interested. My daughter is so eager to make new friends & with our first winter approaching, we'll need some company!

1 mom found this helpful
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V.E.

answers from Minneapolis on

I joined our local MOMS Club and love it. They have different activities for the kids and moms. Some things are playgroups, book club (for the moms), bookworms (get together and read the kids' fav books), cooking club, moms night out, going to parks, and so many more things. Check out the website to find your local club. momsclub.org

1 mom found this helpful
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R.P.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi,
I am also new mommy, and we just moved to woodbury, and my neighbour are nice but few are just got married and few have very grown up kids, but i dont know how to make other mom's company, i am getting worried like when my kid is at age where he want to play he migh not find someone. I dont know how to ask and what to ask or how to break ice.

J.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Good morning Jessica
The biggest lesson I have had to learn in the past couple years is that every relationship worth having needs effort to make it flourish. I am from the area and still found myself feeling lonely and blah. I do daycare from home so am basically "stuck" here from 7am-5:30. Don't get me wrong....I LOVE my job and having the luxury of being with my children BUT toddlers just aren't the same as adults.

What has worked for me:
Joining volunteer groups through the kids school/sports. This may even be a once a month commitment but it gets me out of the house.

Facebook. I get a little virtual grown up fix by reconnecting with old high school and college classmates. This has also been a good way to say, "Hey! I have 2 hours free...who wants to meet for coffee or go for a walk?"

Phone! With facebook and texting being so quick and easy sometimes picking up the phone feels like a chore. DO IT! There is nothing like a good belly laugh during the day.

I started a monthly dinner with just women. It started through facebook with people i knew lived in the area and i literally sent an email saiyng, "HELP I need a social life. Will you be my friend?" It has been oddly reaffirming to see other women in the same boat as me. :)

I talk to EVERYONE I meeet at the park, the grocery store, walking through the neighborhood, at school activities. You never know who you are going to click with.

Like the others said....check into Mom groups. I have done MOPS, ECFE.
And I always have room at the table for another woman at our monthly dinner. Ages tend to range from 32-42. Let me know if you are interested. We meet the third Tuesday of the month.

J.

G.T.

answers from Modesto on

Check it out, this is what a lot of them do.

K.C.

answers from Orlando on

Try meetup.com for some moms groups in your area. That's where I have found many of my mom friends, I never thought it would be so hard to find friends at my age, but as I have become a stay at home mom that works afternoons when my husband is home, I never get to see any of my working friends anymore. Even though I wouldn't trade staying home iwth my daughter for anything, it does get lonely without other grownups around.

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D.G.

answers from Houston on

I remember being the only mom in the neighborhood that was "at home" during the day. In the past I've had good luck with moms groups. You could see if there is a MOPS or a MOMS Club in your area; also search yahoo groups or meetup.com to see if there are any playgroups listed nearby.

Another place to meet mommies are public library storytimes and even La Leche League meetings (if you are breastfeeding). Don't forget to check out your local church too- some churches have moms groups or bible study with child care. Hope this gives you some ideas, good luck!

MOPS http://www.mops.org/
International MOMS Club http://www.momsclub.org/

M.L.

answers from Houston on

A local church, or join a meetup group in your area.

Go to library toddler time as well, or free kids museum days. Walk the mall early in the morning... there are usually lots of moms out there with strollers.

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A.F.

answers from Columbus on

I just signed up for the MOMS club in my area today. It was only $25 for a year. You can be as involved as you want to be, no pressure. I agree, thank goodness for Mamapedia.

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D.J.

answers from Minneapolis on

Definitely look into finding a MOMS Club in your area. That is how I found all of the SAHMs in my area.

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K.B.

answers from Tulsa on

McDonalds, mall playground, school playgrounds, parks. story time,
free art days at the museum,
MOPS, JUST MOMMIES, MOMS, and church are all places I am trying.

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R.Y.

answers from New York on

I met a few mom at the library story hour/playgroup. I year after I stopped going I still run into a few of them in the park, grocery store or where ever. If it is in your budget you could try a Mommy and me class for the baby (YMCA has the best deal in our area).

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M.A.

answers from Dallas on

Yep, look at meetup.com for all kinds of mom's groups!

J.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

Do you have a church you currently attend? We're at First Calvary Baptist Church in Inver Grove Heights. We have a nice young marrieds and young family Sunday School groups. Also, a super active Awana group on Wednesday evening. I have some great friends now thanks to our church. It is a loving, open and friendly atmosphere. We'd love to have you. My husband travels too, so I totally get where your coming from. We girls sometimes trade off kids, or get together for lunches. I also had a mom that would come over daily for walks. We had a blast and would talk none stop the whole walk. LOL. Good times! Let me know if you're interested in coming to church with me! I will give you directions and look for you at the door. =)

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

By doing things I enjoy sans kids. For myself... that means sports (playing), and arts & cultural stuff, and school.

I suppose I'm not a typical "mum", since I'm about 20 years younger than most mums in my area... but I had 0 luck with mom's groups... regardless of the reasons behind it. Instead I found friends (parents and nonparents) in people who enjoy the same things I do.

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L.A.

answers from Minneapolis on

I moved to MN 5 years ago, and think it is the hardest place in the world to make friends. I have always been able to make friends very easily. I have made the few friends I have through ECFE groups. It is usually moms with similar interests/concerns. I also joined a MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers)evening group and really loved the women in that group. It was great support system. If you want more info on that let me know and I can send it to you (Im not sure where exactly you are, or if you want to travel)

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