for example if an adult is very rude to the kid.
If an adult has done something completely inappropriate, and the teen or older kid is protecting themself or a younger sibling, I think yes.
But they should do so respectfully and should come to their parents right after and tell them what happened.
Adults don't get free license to be jerks just because they're adults.
Normally no.
But in some situations my kids have told another adult that something was rude. Because of the situation it was exceptable... they beat me to it and since it affected them or another child I let it slide and back them up.
Not sure what you are going for here but at the point where my kids were old enough to form an argument they were allowed to add that argument. What I mean is adult says this, child could say but this doesn't make sense when you consider that.
As long as there is respect we were all good.
Err how did this become reprimand?
My sons from a very young age have been taught that doors should be held open for people especially women, that gentlemen will let a woman enter first, that you say excuse me when trying to pass someone in a aisle and so on.
Well we got stationed in Utah and discovered a whole new world in which those kinds of things just didn't happen. My oldest at the time was 3 and has my mouth but as an adult I tend to filter a lot. A 3 yr old on the other hand hasn't learned that yet. I lost count with the number of times he would yell "You're Rude." to people that let doors close in our faces, bump into us in aisles and so on. I never stopped him because I was too busy laughing at their shocked faces. It continued the whole time we lived in Utah. I had one person try to call me on my son doing that. I corrected them and said if they had manners in the first place he wouldn't have reprimanded them in the first place.
Now my sons are 11 and 16 and we live in Louisiana now. I let them reprimand people if they are rude to them. Not enough people are teaching their kids manners and more and more adults are forgetting to use the ones their parents taught them.
no. when an adult is rude to my child is becomes my turn to take over....
I wouldn't say it's ok to repriman, however, I have always told my kids that if I am doing something that is wrong, and I should know better, to let me know. I don't mind when they question me, I appreciate that they feel strong enough in their values to remind Mommy when I say a cuss word to stop. There is a line, but it's nice to see the things I teach them are something they hold on to!
My kids are 5 and 9.
There have been times... when I was PMS'ing (not that they knew), but I can get really irritable at those times. Not meaning to, but just am. And my kids will tell me "Mommy, you sound so grumpy, its not nice to talk that way..." and they correct me.
To me, that is fine and good.
Because, sometimes, KIDS can teach us a thing or two.
I know my kids can.
And I am proud of them.
They, think. And speak up.
But they know what "rude" is and who they can or cannot speak that way to.
I'm going to go with "Answer D" which reads: "not enough information given to answer the question."
Like if an adult is Jerry Sandusky rude to a potential victim?
Or a little curt with an answer at a grocery store.....
Possible circumstances vary wildly.
Need more info.
I think it's perfectly fine for a kid to speak up for themselves is someone is being rude. To me, this would mean belittling them, swearing at them, using language which is crude, sexual or violent or name-calling. Then by all means, speak up and tell them to stop.
I think there's a pretty common understanding of what it means to speak to people in a respectful way. None of the above really works as 'respectful'.
We would expect our kids to stand up to other kids who behaving this way toward them; adults are not exempt from the same expectations.
To me, reprimand implies one is correcting behavior with authority. No, kids and teens do not have authority over adults nor should they.
However, I have been taught there IS a correct way to say,"I heard you say {X}. That makes me feel {Y}. {then state desired action}" For instance: I feel like you are being contemptuous and condescending to me, in order to humiliate me that you may more easily control me. I find this extremely disrespectful. That hurts my feelings, and I find it inappropriate, unkind, and derogatory. I am a person just like you and would appreciate it if you would treat me with respect and dignity regardless of whether you inherently agree with me or not.
We have taught our children to speak thusly to others and it consistently pisses adults off that our kids can analyze, verbalize and communicate well enough at 11 and 5 to handle situations in this manner. Expect it to just infuriate adults - especially if their goal IS to control the child as most are wont to do, specifically through manipulation, humiliation, or threatening. Most adults have a hard time handling it.
One caveat: while verbalizing well can lead to true communication, it has to come with maturity enough to see one's own faults and be able to accept them apologetically. We HAVE had situations where our children were treated extremely rudely, unfairly, or even on the brink of abusively without provocation from the child. Typically I have found, however, upon examination of the circumstances, that the child has trespassed from the adult's perspective and that is how the adult chose to handle it. It is wrong, but we take pains to have our children see what they own of the problem as well.
Good luck Mama!
My 5 yr old calls people out on their rudeness all the time, for the most part they are embarrassed and apologize to him when it happens. I think if it is done respectfully then it is acceptable.
yes, if the adult is in the wrong.
a reprimand does not need to be given with disrespect. and will be even more powerful when delivered respectfully to an adult.
you can raise a good kid, with out them being a doormat for any one of authority.
I say, heck yes. Rude is rude. Being an adult does not make it OK to be rude, and being a kid does not mean they are automatically wrong or inferior. It is a huge pet peeve of mine when people are rude to children becauses they are children. How can we lead our children by example if we dont treat them with respect?
PS: Does everyone get the "Parental Code section I.D. ten T." reference? Thats IT speak for IDIOT. ID10T. Cant figure out if that was meant as funny or rude though...
Call them out on being rude yes, reprimand no way. And yes there is a difference. People should treat others with respect, and a youth reprimanding an adult is in itself disrespectful. But then again I'm in the talk it out camp, so I don't think anyone should be reprimanding anyone else, especially publicly.
Yes & No. Depends on the situation.
Respect is a two-way street. Why should random adults be allowed to dish out rude and disrespectful behavior to kids without being called out on it? As long as the "reprimand" is done respectfully, I don't see why it's a problem. I would prefer, however, if another adult-in-charge would take the lead and call out the rude behavior, so the kid doesn't have to.
And there is that use of "allowed" again (as in previous post). Something about that word must rub me the wrong way. I'll have to think about that.
My daughter had my permission to answer snarkiness with snarkiness, regardless of the snarker's age.
Why, yes.
Didn't you get the parenting memo from the school? It's part of No Child Left Behind - Parental Code section I.D. ten T.
Try google - that's been the law for awhile....
I have to say no. I don't think the judgement of older children and teens is strong enough for them to surely decide when an adult was being rude to them versus the child/teen just doesn't like what they're hearing. I think the idea of respect your elders is more important than the likely very occassional time an adult might be rude to a child for no good reason. I think it's giving kids too much leeway and feeds the whole "you're so special" trend. If something really insulting or bad happens, I think it's fine for a child to tell their parent and then the parent can decide how to handle it. I see giving kids the authority to reprimand adults as opening a can of worms.
I wouldn't say "reprimand" as that can get into the territory of being disrespectful. I don't think it's ok for a kid to be disrespectful, so a kid would have to tread lightly. That said, I do think it's ok for a kid to point out that he/she should not be treated in a rude manner and does not appreciate it. If a parent or other adult is there, that person should handle it vs. a child. It's a very fine line when it's a child addressing someone who is an adult, especially it in a position of authority. It ticks me off when people treat each other with disrespect, and that includes adults speaking to children of any age.
Older kids I would expect to allow an adult to take over for them. Teens, especially older teens I would expect to be assertive enough to handle a situation where someone is being rude to them on their own.
No, sweetheart. Reprimand is a very harsh term, and children do not tend to hold the judgment that would make this a good idea. You would do best to just remove yourself from the situation and let your parents handle it for you.
No way! Rude is subjective - what is rude to one may not be rude to another.
