I have a two and a half year old who up until about two weeks ago would be fine falling alseep by herself and rarely wake us up in the middle of the night. Now she screams if we are not in the room with her and she constantly gets out of her bed. When we finally get her to sleep around 8, she usually around 10:00 she gets into our bed and if we try to put her back she cries. Its so out of caracter for her. We have tried so many things: buying her a new doll, playing classical music to help fall asleep, sleeping with other stuffed animals, telling her we will check on her soon. Nothing seems to work. Any suggestions??
You need to find out what is scaring her and then help get ride of it with a night lght, but you need to tell her the nightlight will 'get rid of the_____' and let her pick on out..it has worked with my 5 1/2 year old who was afraid of 'shadows' and now the Shadow Fighting Night Light' has helped completely! We even told him it said that on the directions.
Good Luck
Hi K.,
Not sure if you've tried a night light but that seemed to work with our oldest when she started having trouble going to sleep due to her being scared. We've also always reassured her when she says that she is scared, that there isn't anything to be afraid of as we are right in the next room. As tough as it may be, try not to get frustrated with the behavior but definitely don't give into it either. This is a phase that will pass but if you give in, she'll continue to do it. Reassurance for her is key. Good luck.
It could be separation anxiety, a phase or she may be having nightmare or night terrors which are horrible to go through. Try to rule out these things & if you find out that none of those are the issue then just keep bringing her back to her bed with out saying too much but reassure her that it is time for bed & you and daddy are just in the next room & there for her. I remember as a small child having night terrors they are so horrible, some times you don't even realize the child is actually asleep you may think they are awake when they are not. Has she complained about monsters at all?
It may also just be a phase I hear 3 & 4 year olds go through this "not wanting to go or stay asleep" & the parents cannot figure out what the issue is.
K.:
I have 2 kids ages 2 and 4. Both seemed to go through this (and the 2 year old is in it now!). It seems at this age they are cognitively developed enough to have fears. Fear of the dark is a big one, I didn't see this on the list but maybe you already do it: night light and/or light on at bedtime. The other one is "Monsters" or similar fear. With both our kids we had to do a "monster check" of the room before bedtime. We gave them a flashlight the together we would check for mosters...under the crib, in the closet, behind the door, etc. My son was also afraid of cars (driveway was under his window and car alarms/cars starting would scare him). He thought that the cars would get inside the house, when I explained that they were too big to get through the door he calmed down and eventually this wasn't an issue for him.
Take home message from all my blathering: you have to think outside the box to figure out the real trigger here. Then, depending on what it is, get creative to help them feel some "power' over the fear (if it is fear related). I have also heard of some filling a spray bottle with water and using this as "monster spray" to keep the monsters out at night.
Good luck! My 2 year old is scared of clowns on the ceiling! Not sure where that came from....I use the dust buster to "scare" it away-is working for now:)
K.
We went through the same thing with our now 3 YO. She was doing well on her own and then started getting scared. I was talking about this with a seasoned mom of 5 at my work. She gave me great advice- she said to acknowledge that they are afraid and not to downplay that at all. She told me she had success with a sleeping bag in her room next to her bed. You can tell your daughter that you realize she is getting scared and that to honor that you are giving her a special place in your room that she can come to that is right next to you. My daughter totally dug this idea. She loved the sleeping bag (and it is really cozy) and having a spot in our room was just the fix. She would bring her things in during the night (a doll and her pillow) and snuggle into her "bed". She would either start out in there or begin in her room and come into ours. Sometimes I would wake up but sometimes she would come in without me knowing. She was using my camping sleeping bag so we didn't even have to invest in anything. She used it for a few months and after coming back from vacation this summer she went back to her old routine of doing fine in her room.
Hope this helps. Apparently this is a normal stage so just help her through it and she will be back to doing bedtime herself when she works through it all.
K.
My almost 3yo daughter is going trought kind of the same thing. I thank God once she's asleep, she's stayed asleep. We took her to the store to pick out her own night light. She thinks her ceiling fan is a monster. Where she even understood the onster term I don't know. She only watches Playhouse Disney and the monster band are good and funny, not scary. But she thinks it is and has been very difficult to get to sleep. We have stuck to our routine, brush teeth, potty, prayer and she turns on her night light and has Pooh. That's it we leave. We very rarely go in when she is still awake to check on her. I think sticking to the routine helps a lot.
