7 Month Old Night Waking and Won't Make Eye Contact in the Morning

Updated on November 18, 2010
S.P. asks from Chicago, IL
6 answers

My 7 month old daughter has been waking excessively at night for about a month and a half (she wakes between each sleep cycle, about 45 minutes). After the doctor checked her out and confirmed she is healthy, we thought perhaps she is waking because she wants to nurse. She usually latches on and then drifts right back to sleep. I have been trying to nurse her less and less at night, but when she is really insistent, I do (lately I do it about 2 or 3 times). I can't let her cry without responding, but sometimes just a cuddle is enough to settle her. Last night my husband slept on a mattress in her room (which I started doing when the night waking started) and responded to her instead of me. He said she settled easily for him and a couple of times she stirred and made noise but quieted and drifted back to sleep without any intervention. He said she did not cry without response from him. So this morning when he brought her to me to nurse at 6 am she nursed like usual, but since then she has been acting distant toward me. She is not looking at me and smiling as much as usual (she is usually a very happy and friendly little one). She was giving Daddy all the eye contact and smiles though. Is this just because she had spent more time with him, or is she feeling detatched from me? I guess I feel like I withheld comfort from her and maybe she is feeling bad about me. Am I just being a guilty mommy? My husband thinks I am projecting my emotions on the baby. I have also noticed that she does this to my parents if she hasn't seen them for a while, she won't look at them or interact with them for the first hour. When I was working when she was 3-4 months old she also did it to me when I would get home from work. Normal?

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

"My husband thinks I am projecting my emotions on the baby."

I think he's right.
She's fine.

1 mom found this helpful
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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

she is fine...Very normal. Babies/Kids go in cycles...One minute it is about Daddy and the next Mommy...I have three...and they each have done the same as you described.

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T.T.

answers from Chicago on

dont worry about it you arent doing anything wrong . if she wasnted to nurse you said you give it to her so i dont see why shed be "mad" at you. Most likely she is waking due to teeth. nursing is a natural pain reliever. If you nurse when she insists then you are doing the right thing. I dont see how you are doing anything wrong for her to be mad at you, get some sleep mama tomorrow could be a whole different day! good luck!

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R.B.

answers from Chicago on

At 7 months, my now-16-month old daughter also starting waking A LOT. Then she popped through 4 teeth all at once, with 4 more following a couple weeks later. Then things went back to normal. Granted I was grumpy from being so tired! I'm home with her all day and while she says "Dada" and "Bubba (brother)", she has yet to say "Mama" in reference to me. I could freak out that she doesn't like me or I did something that made her mad. It bothers me a little bit, but she knows I'm here all day, so why should she bother ever saying my name? So, now I let my worries go and just focus on her and her health.

Bottom line, I think you're worried that by you getting a couple extra minutes of snoozing overnight (so that you can be the best momma you can be during the day!), you're emotionally hurting her and she's mad. I think quite the opposite! She needs a good connection with her daddy, too. Think of it this way, you're being an awesome momma by letting her connect with daddy!!!

Your daughter will continue to love you! You are her momma! You are the one...the only. This, too, shall pass.

Plus, having her able to settle for someone else will come in handy if you ever want an evening out!

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S.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

its probably a bit of you projecting your emotions on her and her (maybe) being mad at you. i've noticed this with my son as well ... not yet sure if its me being guilty/paranoid or if he actually gets upset with me for not soothing him right away .. but in any case, he always forgives and forgets ..whew! :)

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G.T.

answers from Washington DC on

She's fine.

if she is like my own daughter, she may just be a little mad at you. At 7 months, my daughter would give me the "no smile face" when I went to a business trip overnight. She wanted to show me that she noticed I was out. After a day, she was back to normal. (But still has this attitude, though!)

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