What Could I Have Done?

Updated on April 04, 2012
B.. asks from Rockwall, TX
16 answers

I was sitting at a red light yesterday and looked to my left. In the turning lane there was a car with a toddler. She was tiny, much smaller then my average sized 3 year old. I could only see her, because she was STANDING up, in the FRONT seat!! There was no car seat in the car, at all. She was clearly not buckled and having a great time. The driver nor the little girl seemed to be in any distress, or hurrying because of an emergency. I tried to get the attention of the driver, but they were on the phone. (I don't know what I'd have done if I even got their attention!) They got an arrow and the car behind was too close for me to get a license plate number. I couldn't get in the tuning lane, it was too backed up.I just sat there and had NO idea what I should do. (Other then praying they get pulled over.) I have been thinking about that little girl since it happened!! Is there something I could have done in the situation? I thought of dialing 911, but...I don't know...

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So What Happened?

❄J€§§¡¢aW€§§¡¢a❄™- I said I couldn't see the license plate.

Thanks ladies, next time I will call 911. I had never seen anything like that before, so I was really shocked and dumbfounded. It also happened very quickly, and I could only get the color of the car with no other information on the make, model, etc. Since it's happened once now, I will be prepared for next time!!

Featured Answers

R.D.

answers from Richmond on

I still would have called 911. If they had an officer in the area, it's pretty easy to pick out 'the white 4 door sedan with a toddler bouncing around'. I've made that call numerous times in my life!

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M..

answers from Appleton on

To be honest... I would have probably done the same exact thing that you did. What can you really do in that type of situation except call the police if you have all the info, which you weren't able to see. It's sad that people put their children in danger like that.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

ETA - Jennifer - you are right - we grew up without car seats. I was transported in a laundry basket with pillows in it. But there weren't MILLIONS of cars on the roads then and people did NOT have cell phones and ipods and all the technology of today.

B.:

What have I done? I have called the police. Given them the plate number and as much information as possible. There was one time I snapped a picture of the kid running around in the back seat. I don't know what came of it. I don't know if they do anything about it.

But it's these same "parents" (and I use that word loosely) that are crying at the cameras after an accident because their baby is gone....if you had been a PARENT your child might still be alive pinhead. I know that sounds mean - but I don't get it when people cry and don't understand how something like this could happen...well...your child most likely would NOT have gone through the windshield or thrown from the car if you had BUCKLED THEM UP!!!!

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K.S.

answers from Denver on

This kind of thing is the bain of my existence. Of course with a clear head and time to think, you know exactly what to do. But things never happen in slow motion! I seem to always be caught off guard and not react the way I want in a situation, and then dwell on it afterward thinking I should have done something else.

Don't beat yourself up. Next time know that you could call 911 with the description. But this time, hopefully your prayers were heard and the car was either pulled over or got home safe- or both.

You had good intentions but not enough time to react as you would have liked. Things happen, and all you can do is know what you would do next time.

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T.N.

answers from Albany on

Of course we know better now, but....

I spent my childhood as one of 5 children crammed into a VW B., traveling substancial distances, flopping around in the car driven by my distracted mom with less then, um, honed driving skills.

Still, I'd've been effected by what you saw too. It's no longer necessary to put kids in danger in that way.

:(

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J.P.

answers from Los Angeles on

I'm sure I'll get burned at the stake, but we never had any car seats growing up and most of us survived. I would stand during long car trips in the front seat with my mom. Later, we started using seat belts, before it became another law.

While the front seat is not the safest place for a kid, not to mention the mom on the phone driving distracted, the cops probably wouldn't have been able to find her. When people are in shock with something they see, very rarely can they act clearly in the moment. Hindsight is 20/20.

PS many other countries do not have the same restrictive laws that we do. Many countries do not have cell phone laws or car seat laws. Maybe she borrowed a car or rented it and never thought to rent a car seat? Who knows what her story was...just breathe and realize that if you ever see that again, you'll know how to react.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

In child care I had to call the police one time. One of my parents had broken down and had to get a ride from a co-worker. She had 4 kids and 3 of them were under the car seat laws. She did not bring her car seats. I have extra in my office all the time so I offered to let her borrow enough. She said no, they were in a hurry.

I could not keep her children from her but I did take note of the make and model of the car. I had a good idea which direction they were going to head so I called the police and reported it. She did not get stopped but she should have. I think calling the police and describing the vehicle, what was going on, the name of the street, etc...as much as possible. If you had read in the paper that they had a wreck and the child was thrown from the car you would have felt bad.

I babysat for a friend for a couple of weeks, she had to be at work at 6am and dropped them off about 5:30am. I took her 2 kids to school at 7:30am so they could eat breakfast. Her 3 yr. old daughter rode in their back seat with not even a seat belt on. She refused to do it. I sat in the driveway until she got her hiney in the car seat I had put in for her. She fought with me the next day too but the 3rd day she got in and sat down.

Her mom asked me how I got her to do it and I told her "I didn't give her a choice" It's the law so she has to do it or I would put her in the 5 point harness and she could scream all the way to school. I can put in ear plugs but she is going to sit her hiney in the car seat.

Mom was more bossy after that, poor kid, but she say in her car seat every day from that point until she was too old.

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B.B.

answers from Dallas on

This is my BIGGEST pet peve.. I hate this, I always call the police, I dont care, I give the car description, and Ill try to get the lisence plate number, I know its too late now, but next time, maybe you could make a quick U turn adn get the info you need. I hate this, and I see it all the time, I was late for work one week becasue there was like 3 kids all under 5 in the back seat of a car, at the gas station, none of them were in a car seat, buckled or nothing, and I called the police, and Waited, once they arrived I had to leave, but the neighborhood was not the best, and there is a fire station just a block away, so they came pretty quick,
but I always call.

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E.T.

answers from Albuquerque on

I would have either shaken my head at people's stupidity, or maybe called 911 and reported the type of car and the direction it was travelling.

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I would have called the police. It makes me so mad to see people not keeping their kids safe. Even without the plate number, a description of the car, driver, and toddler jumping around should have been good - plus where you saw them going.

Don't feel bad though. In the moment it can be hard to decide what to do.

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D..

answers from Charlotte on

It's a different day and time that we live in now. Huge SUV's. Road rage. A LOT more traffic. People who didn't buckle up "back then" were darn lucky that nothing happened to them. And anyone not buckling up nowadays and remaining "unscathed" are darn lucky, too.

Because there is SO much at stake when accidents occur, people who don't buckle children, at least, into a car seat need to have a law that tells them that there are consequences for it. Just imagine if one of US ran into a car that caused a little child to die. It's one thing to say "Well, if that idiot would have buckled their child into a seat, she wouldn't have died." But it's another thing to go to bed every night praying for that little girl's soul.

I for one am glad for the laws and glad for the people who don't ignore the laws. So if I make a mistake and get into an accident, it's much less likely that little child is going to die because she is strapped into a safe carseat.

That's my view of this issue. B., if you weren't able to get a license plate number, there was nothing you could do, honey. I would have been worrying about that all day long too.

Dawn

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

Unfortunately I see this all too often! There's really nothing you can do -except hope a cop also sees them. Here they will not send an officer in pursuit of such a sighting if you call 911. I guess there's too much traffic, the car could be turning into its driveway in a second, etc.

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☆.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Ugh.
Pray that the parents FAIL at other parts of their lives to the extent that the child is taken out of a dangerous or neglectful situation or PRAY that this was a O.-time thingamabob for whatever reason.

People are dolts!

We used to take vacation with my cousins, O. car, 4 adults, 5 kids.
My brothers "seats" were on TOP of the luggage in the back of the station wagon! (All the better to become a projectile missile to launch THROUGH the front windshield, you know!)

We know better now.
Poor kid.

You really weren't in a position to get the plate # but I guess you could call 9-1-1 and give position/description of the car...

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T.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

i would have called 911 and told them what you saw and what road they turned on. Even if you didnt get the licence plate number. I would have told them the make and color of the car and where they turned. That is very unsafe and the driver was on the phone to top it off. There is not much more you could have done.

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J.S.

answers from Hartford on

You should have called 911 and given them the license plate number with a description of what you saw. All of it. Being on the cell phone while driving, a small child not in a safety seat in a moving car, a small child under the age of 13 in the front seat AND not in a safety seat... all of it.

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A.M.

answers from Dallas on

there is a website you can report these things on...I cna't find it but I know it's out there!

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