?'S on Using Alarm to Stop 4 1/2 Yr Old from Wetting Bed

S.,
I have an 11 year old son who still wets the bed. He does not wake up at night. He is a very heavy sleeper. I have tried every alarm possible. None work for my son. 4 1/2 is still pretty young. I think it would be more stress on you and you daughter to stop using pullups. I know they are expensive but you want her to get a good nights sleep. What is more important to you? She can't help it. You don't want it to affect her self-esteem. My best advice would be to let it be and see if she grows out of it.

My pediatrician recommended an alarm for my son when he was the same age. We got it and it included stickers to use for each dry night and after he had so many dry nights in a row he could send in for a certificate. At first, it scared him (it was loud), so I put a sticker over the speaker to muffle it a bit. He got used to it quickly, and it worked. Major improvement in about a week, completely stopped the bed wetting after about 3 weeks. If the bedwetting is a real problem, I would consider it. After my son got used (a few nights), he would feel so proud of himself when he woke up dry. Oddly, he kind of had fun with it.

I agree that 4 1/2 is too young. Plus, I've learned from personal experience that the alarm isn't designed to get the kid up, it's meant to wake you so that you can get her up and take her to pee. It was an unmitigated disaster. I was miserable, my son was alternately ashamed, grumpy and soaked. When he didn't disconnect it in his sleep, it went off so many times we ran out of clean clothes to attach the sensor to. My advice is to let her be for a while.

I think 4 1/2 is still pretty young for this. My niece really didn't master staying dry at night until about 7, and she wore pull ups all that time. Her doctor said she just wasn't able (mentally and physically) to stay dry at night. At 7 she finally stopped wetting. My neighbor sets her own alarm at about 3 a.m. and takes her 5-year-old to the bathroom EVERY NIGHT. Otherwise he wets the bed. I just think at this age an alarm might startle her too much, especially if she just isn't capable yet of staying dry.

I'm having the same problem with my 4 1/2 year old. She is such a deep sleeper and is often soaked in the mornings. She shares a room with her barely 3 year old sister who has been dry through the night since she was 20 months old, so I know if she could stay dry she would. It just kills her that her younger sister can do it and she can't. I'll be curious to hear what you decide to do. I was going to ask my daughter's doctor at her 5 year check up in February what she thinks. Good luck!

I used the alarm with both of my children, the youngest about 4.5 years old. It worked like a dream with both of them. Yes, it wakes the parents, but in time, will wake the child and teach them to get up. I was surprised how quickly it worked. Both kids were trained in under 3 weeks. Make sure to read all the material that comes with any alarm and be prepared to change clothes and bedding often. It was so worth it for us. Good luck!

100% agree with Nora P, its a hormonal/chemical thing and no alarm in the world is going to 'cure' your issue. Stick with the pull=ups and ease your self and child of the frustration. Good luck

I for 1 have used this alarm for my son. It was recommended by our pediatrician. We are using it now as we have had one in the past & had a set back. It is a Malem Bedwetting alarm. They are pricy, but worth it. It attaches to the shoulder where the alarm will sound & the sensor attachs to the outside of the underpants. It is designed to wake the child as soon as moisture hits the sensor, which in turn trains the brain to know when the body has to pee. My son is a very sound sleeper, but wakes when the alarm goes off. However, I have to agree with some of the other posters that 4 1/2 is a little early to be worried about it. My son was in school long before we tried this & didn't know what else to do as he was starting to want sleepovers & as you already know that is near impossible when the child wets the bed all the time. My son is also a bigger child so we were running out of options since he longer fit in pull-ups. There is a website by the name of: Bedwettingstopped.com
This site sells the Malem brand, but offers a buy back program when you are done with it.
Good luck.

I have never used the alarm, but I know when I was your daughters age, I had the same problem! I was a very deep sleeper as a child and I remember (mostly from stories my mom told), that my dad would wake me up before he went to bed or when he got up for work (4am) and take me to the bathroom. Sometime I would still be sleeping! My dad told me that he woke me up one time and took me to the bathroom, then handed me the toilet paper and said "wipe yourself". I proceded to wipe my face, my hands, my belly, but not the right place to wipe! My dad got so frustrated, that he woke my mom up to help him out!
Good luck with this, I hope I made you smile a bit! Maybe you can wake her up and put her on the potty too!
K.

My kids aren't yet old enough for potty training, but my husband's parents used the alarm system for him when he was little. He has HORRIBLE memories about the alarm going off, and every time he heard it, it made him feel like a failure. He was pretty little and still remembers how bad he felt when it went off and said that we will never use one on our kids because of it. This isn't to make you feel bad, but just to let you know a kids point of view. Good luck!

Sorry this is not a direct answer to your question but my pediatrician recently told me that only 50% of kids age 5 are potty trained so the told me to relax about it. I also wet my own bed until I was 10!!

didn't work for us. only spent a lot of money on alarm and scared the life out of my son. as soon as alarm was taken off, he began sleeping through urge and bed wetting returned. My advice, wait until she out grows or just get into the habit of waking her yourself and gently taking to bathroom. My kids didn't outgrow until 9 and my other 9 year old is still suffering. Good luck.

And, I do believe this is one of the best kept secrets among parents. So don't sweat it, many of us have been or are in your shoes.

Shelia,
I took care of a little boy who had this issue until he was 11! This all before pull ups came in big sizes. Patience is needed here with him it was a physical problem until his urinary tract caught with the rest of his body he was unable to tell he was wet when he was asleep. Thank goodness for plastic sheets. We would make the bed with two layers every night. Oh the laundry! As he got older hit was not every night more like a few times a week. We tried the alarms did not work, medication for a little while then his body was use to the drug,(prescription, homeopathic worked for a time also) Point is she is still very young and it will happen just like every thing else in parenting when it does.
J. O

Our 9 year old son still wears a pull up to bed. We have not tried an alarm or other methods yet and I'm interested to read what other moms think. Our son is also a very, very heavy sleeper. We have occassionally woken him up to go to the bathroom but that is hit or miss too -- sometimes even though we wake him up to go during the middle of the night, he still wets the bed; other times we don't wake him up to go and he's dry all night. Our pediatrician has asked if we want to take a look at possible physiological causes (underdeveloped bladder, etc.) but we have chosen not to at this point. Our son is only recently beginning to be bothered by his bed wetting. He wants to have sleepovers with his friends (like his older sister does) but is concerned about wearing a pull up at a sleepover or having an accident if he doesn't wear one. We've really tried to find a balance for how we handle the situation. We don't make a big deal about it and he knows that eventually he'll stop wetting the bed, but we do try to be sensitive to what he's feeling. He does participate in washing his bed linens when he wets them, but he also helps wash his linens and clothes anyway as part of his chores. According to his doctor, there are tests and medications that may help identify and treat the problem, but again, we're taking his cues for how we proceed. Either he will outgrow it or eventually he'll want to look at alarms and tests/medication that may help.

She's ONLY 4 1/2. PLEASE don't stress about it yet. The ability to hold your pee at night, or wake to go pee, is purely a hormone/chemical thing. If they don't have that hormone no amount of bed alarm will work. You'll just end up with a tired, crabby kid on your hands. Please just pay for the night time diapers/pull ups and count yourself lucky that she sleeps through the night. ALL the medical experts say not to do any interventions till they are 8 yrs old. And then they can take medicine that makes that hormone work.

N., mom to Tara who used pull ups till 5 1/2 and Elise who is still in pull ups at 6 1/4.

Hi- I used one of these with my daughter years ago, and as i recall, it worked really well, although I think she was more like 5 or 6 at the time. Don't fret- this will eventually end- and wearing pull ups for a while longer isn't the worst thing. The important thing is not to allow yourself to get too frustrated, or to let your child see your frustration. This is not an act of defiance- it is a developmental issue that will work out itself in time. Blessings- N.

Shelia,

I have had hat issue with my daughter as well. I have to say that I did use the alarm and it worked wonders for her. We kept track of it on a calendar with a sticker everyday that she woke up dry. It did take acouple of months to be completely cured. She would have an accident here and there. After that she has been dry ever since. She was 5 or 6 when we had this issue and she is now 8. We tried it because of the pullup thing to as well as her doctor suggested as well. I will tell you it is the best $60 I ever spent. Good luck!!
Let me know how it worked for you.

D.

It worked for us. My oldest son first used an alarm his doctor reccommended but it was not loud enough so he didn't wake up. My friend told me to try the Nytone brand alarm and it worked great! The website is www.stopbedwetting.net. It was much louder and we may start to use it for the younger son. Your child will need to wear it consistently for a couple weeks to train the brain. I used baby monitors so that I would hear it and make sure he got out of bed and went to the bathroom. Hope this helps and good luck.

We had to have our daughter wear pull ups until she was at least 5 and we were very stressed about it. My husband would insist no more pull-ups and sure enough she would wet the bed in the middle of the night and you know how fun that is. My pediatrician said you really shouldn't be that concerned about until they are about 6 years old. She's not wearing them anymore and we always make sure she doesn't drink anything before bed and goes to the bathroom right before getting into bed. She has had a couple accidents since then but does well overall. It is very frustrating!

S., I didnt read through your responses because you have alot of them lol. But my oldest who is now 9 also was very hard to train. He was also very close to 4 before I got him trained. I didnt think he was going to start preschool because of it. What I had to do was stop all liquids 2 hours before bedtime. That even included no sips of water which was hard because he kept trying to sneak them. He screamed and tried to get out of bed without us seeing him and everything but finally after 4 months it worked. I hope this helps some. Good luck

May I suggest nothing to drink for a few hours (2-3 hours) before bedtime and making sure that she goes on the potty before going to sleep. The alarm idea can be very embarrassing and may create emotional issues. I like the idea of giving stickers (or whatever she really likes)in the morning when she dry.
She is still quite young and stressing her out is not what you want to do.
Good luck!