Seeking Advice on Getting My Baby to Sleep in Her Crib

Updated on December 07, 2006
T.D. asks from Sterling, OH
30 answers

Hello. I am a 24 year old mom with my first baby. She is 11 weeks old and refuses to sleep in her crib. I spend my nights with hur curled up in my arms on our couch. The only person to have much success with getting her to sleep in her crib is my mother but she does this by putting her on her stomach to sleep and just checking on her on a regular basis. Since her crib is in my living room (I have a friend painting murals all over her nursary walls so she can't sleep in there right now.) it's not a big deal to let her sleep that way while I'm awake to watch her but with all I've heard I just don't feel comfortable leaving her that way whle I'm sleeping. I have tried many times to put her down on her back but at best that lasts only about 30 min but normaly she wakes up almost instantly and starts crying. She seems to hate sleeping on her back unless it's on my lap and only likes side sleeping when I put her on my couch so she feels like I'm still holding her. If any one has any advice I would really appreciate it.

Thanks,
T.

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F.A.

answers from Cleveland on

Hi T.

Well i have 5 teenagers and i've always had them sleep on their stomaches. But if you feel uneasy about it, have her on her side. That way you'll feel better and she will get some sleep and you get some rest and peace of mind. Hope that helped

enjoy her
F.

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V.N.

answers from Columbus on

Have you tried laying her on her side? I know the rules on the way babies should sleep changes all the time, but my 2 girls would only sleep on their side. I would remove the crib bumper's so in case they rolled they wouldn't soffocate. Just a thought! Good luck!

Val

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M.G.

answers from Columbus on

T., my son loved sleeping in his car seat for the longest time. I think it felt cozy to him because it was small and snug. I had read babies like to be bundled up while they sleep because it felt more like what they had become use to (the womb) and they find it comforting.

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S.W.

answers from Cincinnati on

First of all, you are doing the right thing by sleeping with your baby.

Ask Dr. Sears
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp

Mother-Baby Behavioral Sleep Laboratory
http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/faq.html

The Natural Child Project
http://www.naturalchild.org/james_mckenna/

But, co-sleeping on a couch can be dangerous and lead to suffocation if the baby slips down between you and the couch cushions or falls off the couch. Also, heavy smokers should not co-sleep.

Snuggle up in bed with your baby and have peace of mind that you are doing what is best developmentally for your baby.

3 moms found this helpful
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C.Y.

answers from Cincinnati on

T..

I am a mother of two...our son is 2, and our daughter is 10 months. I had the exact same problem with BOTH of my kids!! My husband spent the first 3 weeks of my sons life sleeping with him on the couch-he would only sleep there-he didn't need to be held, but he wanted the couch. Then, after he started rolling over, he would sleep on his stomach. Therefore, when our daughter was born, we noticed the same thing-we let her tummy sleep in her crib, and she has been sleeping all night since she was 6 weeks old-always on her tummy!! Both of my kids STILL sleep on their tummies-for 12-14 hours a night!! Good luck!! Hope this helps ease your mind a little about it being all right to tummy sleep-after all, our parents all were told to lay us on our tummies, and we are still here!!

1 mom found this helpful
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R.S.

answers from Cleveland on

I understand that research says we have to lay our children on their backs or they are gonna die but when my 14 year old was born they said you had to lay them on their tummy or they were gonna die. After going through a whole lot of sleeplessness with my now 6 year old we finally (out of exhaustion) let her sleep on her tummy and she was just fine. Don't lose sleep unless your child has other indicators for SIDS like smoking in the home, breathing trouble, etc.

1 mom found this helpful
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M.B.

answers from Cleveland on

Both my daughters were the same way - and I decided to ignore the doctors and let them sleep how they were most comfortable - ON THEIR STOMACH....they slept through the night, woke well rested, and after a few nights of nervously checking on them, I slept well also.

1 mom found this helpful
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L.F.

answers from Canton on

My first girl would not sleep on her back at all-if you want any sleep put her on her belly. We started my son out on his belly the first day and have not had any problems with him sleeping, he in now 9 months old. I think it has to do with the pressure on their belly, trying to pass gas and stuff. If that makes her more comfortable, try it for a little while and ask you doctor what they think. Just because that is what everyone tells you to do does not mean it is the best for your child.

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K.K.

answers from Cleveland on

T.,
Go to responds and requests and read the entry about tummy sleeping from 9/29. Someone there listed several websites that were from research stating that it is ok for kids to tummy sleep. I have 3. They have all tummy slept. The risk of SIDS is not increased by tummy sleeping. Just make sure the crib doesn't have stuffed animals and a bumper pad. Have you every tried sleeping on your back? It really isn't that comfortable :-) Anyway, by the time your cutie pie is 20 weeks old and rolling over she will flip herself to her stomach anyway.

1 mom found this helpful
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N.H.

answers from Cleveland on

I put in the same request not too long ago and the only thing that worked for my little girl was to sleep on her stomach. I did all the research and because I was so uncomfortable still I bought the Angel Monitor that actually goes under the sheet in the crib and would alert me if she ever stopped breathing. Now mind you, my daughter is only 8 weeks and I've been doing this for the past 3 weeks and she now sleeps from 11:30pm until 7:30am. Believe me, I know how scared you are. I slept in her room on the floor for a solid week and still got up to check on her every 10 minutes. Then I had someone send me info on SIDS and there was no evidence that SIDS was linked to babies sleeping on their stomachs. I tried every suggestion people gave me about swaddling and letting her fall asleep on me and then letting her cry it out which I feel at her age was too young so I went with the tummy thing and it's worked for me. I wish I could give you some miralce advice to help solve the problem, but some babies are just more comfortable on their tummies and you need your sleep to keep your sanity. I wish you the best of luck. N. H.

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C.G.

answers from Dayton on

I wouldn't worry about your baby sleeping in the crib right now since she's so young. My daughter slept in her carseat for the 1st 3 months. I think it had to do with the space in her crib. She wanted to be snuggled. She also slept on her stomach and no matter how often I would roll her on her back she would scream until she made it back to her tummy. She's 18 mos and now sleeps in her crib fine... except on her tummy.

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S.S.

answers from Columbus on

Keep putting baby on her tummy - if you're worried about SIDS, please rest assured the back-to-sleep campaign hasn't reduced SIDS deaths one iota - sleeping position has NOTHING to do with mysterious crib death.

All three of mine were tummy sleepers from one hour from birth on, and slept extremely well. Back-sleeping is simply uncomfortable, aggravates gas/reflux pains, and creates a startle reflex with loose limbs. Please don't ever use sleep positioners - those are suffocation hazards and need to be removed from the market.

EDITED TO ADD: If a monitor will help YOU sleep better, spend the money on it, however, please be advised a SIDS baby cannot be revived... these monitors do NOT detect SIDS. Please also keep in mind, SIDS is SOOOOOOOOOO rare (you have a higher risk of injury or death to your child in an auto accident), that frankly, it's not worth thinking about AT ALL.

Tummy sleeping will solve your problem. Good luck!

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C.F.

answers from Rochester on

Try using a Halo sleep sack to keep her warm, and then put her on her side (moving very slowly) with her back against the crib. Use an additional lightweight blanket to sort of tuck her in if she needs it. This will make her feel more secure, and feel more like she is being held, so hopefully she won't wake up. Another thing you may want to try is to use some kind of white noise in the room that she sleeps in. A humidifier, or a fan pointed away from her, or nature sounds, whatever. Sometimes this helps babies stay in a deeper sleep, so when you move them they won't totally wake up. Don't give up on side sleeping yet, because it is still safer than sleeping on her stomach.

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S.

answers from Dayton on

T.,

My son would only sleep on his stomach, which I later found out was from reflux. We purchased a monitor that monitors their breathing. If there is no movement for 10 seconds the monitor goes off. We also had a video monitor so I could keep an eye on him. Just be sure that you remove all objects from the crib that the baby can reach and you should be fine. Best of Luck!

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L.C.

answers from Cleveland on

I am having a similar problem with my 8 week old. He was sleeping fine in the bassinet in my room. Only waking up for 1 feeding during the night. About 2 weeks ago I started the transition to the crib. For the most part he will sleep in there for a 4-5 hour period but only if he is in a deep sleep when I lay him down. Once I feed him, I can forget putting him back in the crib. He will be content for about 5 minutes then he starts to wail. I am not sure what to do.

I do have an older son who is not 2 1/2. When he was about 10 weeks I put him in his crib also. BUt after just 2 nights of letting him cry himself to sleep he understood that was where he need to rest. Ever since I haven't had a problem, he just falls alseep on his own as soon as I lay him down there.

I guess some babies are just more stubborn than others. Please let me know if you get any great advice!

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D.K.

answers from Cleveland on

Have you tried to swaddle her? My daughter would only sleep in small spurts but once we swaddled her she slept much better. There is a book by Dr. Harvey Karp called "The happiest baby on the block" and it is the best book that I have ever encountered for babies. Goof Luck!
D.

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T.P.

answers from Canton on

I'd like to suggest purchasing a sleep positioner. It's 2 wedges, that allows baby to sleep on her side, without accidentally rolling onto her tummy. It keeps her on her side. She might like that better. She's still young, so wanting to be near you isn't necessarily a bad thing. You might try a special stuffed animal, with your scent on it. Put it down your shirt, against your chest, for an hour or two. This is what they do in the NICU when Mom can't be there 24/7. Then refresh said stuffed animal every couple of days, by placing in your shirt, again, for half an hour or so. They call it SAM, in the NICU at Aultman. It stands for something, but I can't remember. Hope this helps. Good luck!

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S.C.

answers from Austin on

Hi T.. My son had colic for the first 16 weeks. He too would only sleep while I held him. During the day, I would swaddle him and lay him in his bouncer. That usually insured a good 30 minute nap!!! At night I used the side sleeper which didn't work as well as putting him on his stomach, but worked better than putting him on his back. And with the side sleeper, I had a little bit of peace of mind knowing he couldn't roll over to his stomach--but that didn't stop me from constantly checking on him though! Hope this helps, Good luck!

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P.J.

answers from Columbus on

Both my children were the same way and I would not put them on there beelies to sleep because when a baby is young they can not lift there head very well and could sufficate. So what I did was used the postition thing it is two wedge pillows that are velcrowed together and you can change the size it goes under the arms and down to the hips and you can place baby on either side or back. If it is placed right there is not a chance of suffication. I used it for both my kids and it worked wonders. That was the only thing that worked for me. Good luck

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J.G.

answers from Cleveland on

T.,

I have has 3 little ones... all three of them ended up sleeping on their stomach and they are now 12, 2 and 1 years old. The two younger ones still sleep on there stomach the smaller of which curls up in a little ball (like the fetal positions). All of them are fine. I think there is a lot of guessing on what causes SIDS... I was told by my Doctor that if they can lift there head then there is no problem with them on there stomach. Before they were able to lift there head I would lay them on there side with a rolled up banket or two behind them for support... but this only lasted a little while (the hosiptal did this too). My babies never sleep on there back - I was afraid they would spit up and chock on it... but I think that was just my fear. I've been told it couldn't happen...

If she likes to sleep on her stomach - let her... then you can get a little needed rest too.

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D.L.

answers from Youngstown on

T.,
Have you tried swattling her? I am not sure that I spelled that right. This is where you wrap the baby tightly in a receiving blanket with their arms down inside of it. It worked for my grandson. It makes them feel like they are being held.

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K.L.

answers from Cleveland on

Is she very fussy when you lay her down? I f she is that sounds like my problems with both my boys, they had colic for the first 4-6months! I used a side sleeper I got from a relative. You can get them at Wal-Mart for like $10! They're great, they position them on the side and prevent rolling and smothering. Thry that, see if it helps. I agree, at 11 weeks, I wouldn't let her on her stomach alone. My oldest always slept well that way when he had colic so bad, but I could only let him do it while I was awake and observant! The side sleeper did help immensely!
Good luck!

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M.H.

answers from Cleveland on

Sometimes babies like the vibration that's felt when they are laying on you (which would usually be on their stomach). I know my 14 month old slept the best when I had the device that came w/ her pack'n'play on. It plays music, nature sounds,has lights, and also vibrates.... It's just a suggestion, it doesn't work for all.... I even found that after she was too large for the bassinet part, I attached the musical piece to the bar of her crib for added comfort....
Let me know if you decide to try it, and if it does or does not work for you.......
Good luck!!!!!!!

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K.W.

answers from Cleveland on

Try having her sleep in a swing. That worked wonders for my daughter at that age.

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B.B.

answers from Cleveland on

Such great advice here!

I just wanted to add that the sense of smell is important to babies, particularly yours since you are with her so much. I used to put the nightgown that I slept in for a few days in my children's crib before washing it. I'd just keep switching out the clothes. Sometimes it was a shirt but it had to have been worn a little! To keep them safe, I wrapped it in a bundle type package with ribbons (no loose ends). When they are still infants they can't undo that. You just want to make sure nothing is loose enough for them to get wrapped up in. It seemed to help anyway.

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S.

answers from Cleveland on

Hello T., have you tried those little props that they make so the little ones are on their sides. I used to roll a receiving blanket under my daughters side to prop her a little. I used to hold her in my arms on the couch too, until one night when I fell asleep, I dropped my precious baby. She rolled down my lap onto the floor more than dropped but you can imagine how horrified I was. So please be careful. GOD BLESS YOU

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M.S.

answers from Columbus on

Coming from a 1st time mom myself, I struggled with this also and spent the first 3 months of her life sleeping on the couch with her, or her in a car seat. Now that she is older, I realize how miserable I was and wished I would have just put her to sleep on her tummy. Not only would we both have slept better, but she wouldn't have gotten flat head (thankfully it corrected itself) Now she sleeps 12 hours a night on her stomach. If I could do it all over again, I would have let her sleep on her tummy and would have gotten one of those special angel monitors. I am not sure the cost, but it alerts you if there is no movement (breathing). The only other peice of advice is to let her sleep wherever she is comfortable, even if that means a swing or bouncy seat. The first few months are basically survival mode, so do whatever works because you need to get as much sleep as possible. As some other people have mentioned, there is no real evidence to support SIDS being linked to tummy sleeping. In fact, there is no real cause for SIDS, but they are starting to point in the direction of underdevelped lungs, which can go undected. So, regardless of how a baby sleeps, SIDS can still occur. My boyfriend's co-workers baby died from SIDS and she slept on her back with nothing in the crib. So, no matter of safe you are, it can still happen.

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K.H.

answers from Youngstown on

my daughter is now 6. She just turned 6 on the 20th of Oct. She too, was a tummy sleeper. I heard all the same stuff you did about how/where the infants had to sleep, but she refused to sleep any other way. i dont know how much sense it makes to have a baby sleep on their backs anyway. Some babies dont mind sleeping on there tummys, but most refuse that postion. I was always conflicked when it came to her sleeping on her back. I know they said that was a way of reducing the chances of SIDS, but if your baby spit up alot, (like mine) i was concerned about her spitting up in her sleep, and not being able to roll herself over to get it out without choking on it. every child is differnet. if that is how she prefers it, then rest assured, she will be ok.

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K.C.

answers from Dayton on

These are all great suggestions. Swaddling is usually the first and foremost because it makes them feel "snug and safe". May I recommend going to BabiesRUs (not sure if I should "advertise" for them) and getting a few of the swaddlers they have. (If you go to the one near the Dayton Mall they are, as you go in the door, to the far left hand side of the store in the last two aisles...yeah, I frequently visited there a lot myself a little over a year ago. ha) I used these for my son (who is now 16 months) and also gave a few out for shower gifts. They had worked wonders.

Also, have you thought of putting some sort of background noise in the room? For example, my son could not sleep in the dead silence - he would always wake up. I guess becuase we had so much going on wherever we went and at home. So we bought a ocean waves/sound CD and keep it repaying all night. He sleeps like a log! :)

Another thing is if the baby has some gas - try Mylicon drops. They help relieve it too. It just sits in their stomach. :-)

Hope any of those help!
K.

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E.J.

answers from Cincinnati on

My son was like your daughter. He would not sleep on his back long enough to save his life. I discussed with his pediatrician and she told me that as long as there was no family history of SIDS and to make sure that all fluffy things was out of the way and to make sure that I used fitted sheets. This is what I did. At night all things that had a chance of slipping in and around his face was out of the question. Shes also going on 3 months so this is a good time to start the belly time. She is also learning to lift her head and go side to side. So its ok.

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