Preschool or Not?

Updated on March 24, 2011
A.B. asks from Wentzville, MO
76 answers

I have a 2 year old little boy and people are starting to ask me if we are going to put him in preschool. I didn't go to preschool but all of his cousins are going. What do you think? I don't particularly want to send him but it might be better for him. What do you think? HELP!

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So What Happened?

Well, after a lot of thought & talk with my husband, I think we are going to keep him home. I might send him to a mother's day out program when he is a bit older, but I doubt it. I am, however, going to contact my local elementry school and find out more about the Mother's as Teachers program. Thank you all so much. A lot of you made my choice a lot easier. Thanks again!

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M.H.

answers from Wichita on

Well I recommend preschool for the fact that now days kids are supposed to know, shapes, all their abc's and a lot of other things when they start preschool. Also it is a proven fact that when kids go to preschool they start out advanced and they tend to like school more and overall succeed more and get better grades

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B.D.

answers from Kansas City on

He's still so little! My 2 year old (October birthday) is going to do a once/ week mom's day out program to start getting him more used to playing with other kids (away from mom) and listening to teachers.
Noone says you have to do pre-school, let alone two years of it!

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T.P.

answers from Columbia on

I am a mother of 3 children and none of them went to preschool...but I loved to have schooltime at home. We picked the morning time, but you can pick whatever is best for you. We would spend less time in the beginning and then up to an hour by the time they were four. We did puzzles, read books, learned our ABC's and I also recieved a kit in the mail once a month that gave me an activity book, stickers, a new reading book...and that became my theme for the month. (you can also just buy these at wal-mart) We did not always do it everyday, but most days we did. My kids loved the attention and the learning. THey are seven, six, and four. THey all love school and socialize often. My advice is you have to decide who you want to teach your kid the basics in life, not just education....right from wrong, morals, behavior they can pick up from other children. (This will happen anyway, so why introduce it at two) you or someone you don't know so well. Example...There is a religion out there that claims, "if you give me your child until he is five, he will be a part of "this religion" for life." it is very true. We as parents are accountable for our children's behavior and abilities whether we send them off or keep them home. Ultimately, we are the ones that answer for them....until they 18. If you stay home.....don't send them away. Have playdates with friends, have schooltime at home, go to the park, the socializing issues that others speak about I feel many times (not all times) comes from selfishness (I want a break....need to run errands....) or comes from feeling guilty because they have to work. so they say things that make them feel better, they need to socialize...they need to be prepared for Kindergarten....everyone else sends them.I am not trying to be mean, so I hope no one takes it the wrong way. Our nature is to be selfish and we all struggle with it. But we only get our children for a short time, in the grand picture, so I say enjoy the time and spend it with them.
I have friends that do take part in preschool. I recommend ,If you decide this is what you want, get invovled in a coop where you are part of the program. But wait until he is a least 3. It is the best of both worlds. But don't do it because everyone else is doing it. Have your own reasons. It is not necessary, especially at two.
T.

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A.R.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi, A.! I am a SAH mom and didn't send either of my children to a formal pre-school. They did attend a dance class once a week which included some preschool stuff (teaching them their address, phone number, parents' names, some alphabet, numbers, colors), and we had always been in a playgroup that met once a week, so we both had socialization. The rest of the material that they would have learned in preschool, I taught them at home with some workbooks that I had been given or bought at Wal-Mart, along with games and other activities that emphasized these skills. If your state has a Parents As Teachers program, I would suggest getting involved with that, too. Parent Educators come to your home 3-4 times a year and "play" with your child to see where they are developmentally and let you know where they are. I live in Missouri - our program is free. If you are interested, call your local school district and ask if they have anything like this. I don't feel that either of my children are behind in school or in social settings. They are where they are supposed to be according to their report cards and conferences with their teachers. You can never get this time back again, so don't be pressured into or made to feel inferior for wanting to spend this time with your child. You will do the right thing for you and your family:-) Good luck!

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K.B.

answers from St. Louis on

I am a mother of 8 and like you with my first one it seemed everyone was giving good advice. Well they were but that was advice that worked with their children, and trust me EVERY CHILD is unique in their own way. Some are more emotional than others, some are more aggressive than others, some show their feelings more than others.
My advice, follow your heart. You know your child better than any one. Do you feel its best to send him to school now, or will he get bored with school by going soo early? Does he need interaction with other kids? Only you can decide what is best for your child.
good luck.

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P.M.

answers from Kansas City on

I have been reading a lot of the reponses and am actually a bit confused as I have never seen an actual PRESCHOOL program for 2 year olds. The places I am familiar with all start formal preschool at 3---- and require kids to be potty trained (which many 2 year olds aren't)

I also think there is WAY too much academic pressure on kids...Why would a two year old HAVE to know his abc's or a 6th grader be able to do Geometry?

I think that any two year old program is likely to be more of 'a break' for mom than an actual preschool experience. And that may be what you want/need. I know there are a lot of Mother's day out programs that start at 18 mos or so--- and might be a good place to start if you want to see if it meets your needs.

It really should be your decision. Try not to let what other people in your family do influence you too much. Look at your family and your child and decide what is best. (My kids did go to preschool and the one who has the most academic difficulty is the one who went to preschool for 2 years rather than 1 --so preschool doesn't guarantee that a kid will excell at school. And my kids went to the same preschool)

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K.K.

answers from Kansas City on

Dear A.,
I say stay at home with the kiddos just as long as you possibly can right now, especially if you are inclined. Some people want other people to raise their babes, but it's not biologically the most natural thing to do, so don't let people make you think that school for a 3 year-old is a natural course of action. Remember, the first three years of a child's life are his most important - and if you have a choice, don't you want to be the one to ensure that his physical, emotional, and psychological needs are met? I'm not trying to tell you what to do, but neither should others make you feel that it's not natural to raise your own baby. For socialization and for the separation-anxiety-thing, you could try classes or playgroups.
K.

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L.C.

answers from Kansas City on

After having taught preschool as well as sent grandchildren to day care here are my thoughts (as my children were grown when I got them). I also did not go to preschool, but my sister went to parent's day out. If you have the ability to stay home with your child and raise them, then by all means I think that is a gift that you should take advantage of, with a few adjustments. One or two days a week of preschool, if you research the school and take an active role in it, is great for the healthy development of you and your child. The child gets social interaction they would not get at home, a chance to live, learn, and function in society, and you get the chance to have errand or free time of your own. They also do not feel like they are away from you for too long, so it is a privaledge. I wouldn't put them in full time if you don't want to or don't have too though. I hope this helps, and good luck to you and your family in this endeavor. Have a great day.

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R.K.

answers from St. Louis on

If you are fortunate enough to be a stay at home mom, you are very lucky! This is the time to cherish and nurture your baby. There is nothing wrong with NOT going to preschool. However, you may find that in kindergarden, he's behind the other kids who have been in a group environment for a few years. I know a lot of moms have found the perfect balance by sending their toddlers to preschool for one or two full or half days a week. The toddler gets to make friends and develop important social skills and learn things you may not think of teaching. And, you get a little time to do things you just can't do with a toddler at your feet. Sending your child to preschool by choice, for his own developmental benefit is much different from sending him because you have to work (which I did and hated it). You won't feel guilty taking your toddler for reasons of your own choosing. And if he freaks out and hates it, you don't have to make him go. You can try again later when he's ready. You're in an ideal situation where you can choose as much or little preschool as you think suits your child.

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B.A.

answers from St. Louis on

I only read a few of your responses, but I will add my opinion. When all is said and done, I think that posting questions and getting answers does give us another perspective, but ultimately strengthens what we always knew we would do, anyway...
But here goes nothing: I was a very young, single mother and I went to school and worked several jobs. My daughter was on state aid at the time and it was affordable to send her to full time daycare. I worked there at the time so I would take her with me and could monitor everything at that young age (she started daycare at 6 weeks old when I had to go back to work). When she was almost a year I got a different job, but continued to take her to that facility. She has learned so much and she excels in school (she's just started kindergarten this year). She still has a best friend from 6 weeks of age. She LOVED to go to "school" and still does! I only wish I had the option to take her part time so that I would have been able to spend more time with her. I personally think taking your son there the one day a week that you work would be WONDERFUL. You can always go to a facility and do a walk through. That's the best way to see how he and you will react. My best advice, go to a facility that you can do a walk through at any time. Call first to see how they sound answering the phones even. When I called around to see who was hiring, I got a feeling even by how they answered the phones...

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T.B.

answers from Topeka on

Personally, I think preschool is a lifesaver for both you and him. You do not have to send him everyday or all day. It is good for him because he learns to socialize and it is good for you because it gives you time to yourself. I put my twins in preschool when they turned two. They were in only part-time until they were four and then I put them in full-time when my school schedule got busy. Just make sure you find a good school. I suggest one by a university, they seem to have the best programs. That is where I put my twins and I will put my daughter when she is ready.

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K.B.

answers from St. Louis on

A.,

I'm of the school of thought that says you should only send you kid if you feel he needs it. Does he get socialization elsewhere? If so, and you feel that he's on track with his learning, I wouldn't send him - and regardless I wouldn't send him until he was at least three. I wasn't going to send my oldest, but she needed speach therapy (continuous bad earaches at the absolute worst time in development) so she's in. To be honest, I would not have sent her otherwise. I like to teach my kids at home - and I feel that they get more from it. Kids that age learn through creative play - not necessarily just structured lesson plans. You could just as easily teach your son his ABC's while taking a walk - "A is for... ANT!! and B is for .... BEE!!" and then you're also getting the added benefit of instilling in you child the idea that learning is fun!! And that it happens everywhere, not just in a classroom. I think that is a much more important approach.

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C.G.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi A.!
Preschool is a personal decision. Try to find out when the Birth to 5 preschool screenings in your area are (I think you can call the grade school) and take your son there. The person who conducts the screenings can help you decide. My husband and I have three kids. The preschool in our very small town is all day, every day. I couldn't imagine sending my kids away for that amount of time at age 3 or 4! To me, that defeats the point of being a SAHM. I'm not the kind of mother who does a lot of teaching at home, so I found a church nearby that does preschool one morning a week, so my kids could start to learn the ropes. Even if you don't send your son to pre-k, it won't take him long to learn how to act in kindergarten. When he sees that all the kids line up, or pick up, or stop talking, he's going to figure it out too. Our oldest started kindergarten this year, not having gone to pre-k, and got student of the month the first month! Good luck with your son, and good luck making your decision!

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N.R.

answers from St. Louis on

I have 3 children and the oldest never went to preschool and did just fine when she got to school. My middle child went to all day preschool at the elementary school and did great too. She learned a lot but I wouldn't say that she was better off than her older sister. My youngest is 4 and he is going to the child care center on campus of the community college that I am going to and he is learning so much. It is amazing what he has learned in just a few short weeks. If you are concerned about your child getting socialization you might want to try the Parents as teachers from your local elementary school. They always have a wonderful program! There area also churches that sponswer mothers day out that would give your child a chance to socializie.
Goodluck
N.

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M.G.

answers from Kansas City on

I agree, this is a personal choice. Personally for me a good Parents Day Out program (PDO) once a week helped both me and my kids out at this age. For me, it was a good break and I was able to get some things done. However, if you work 1 day a week your son may already be getting some socialization? Good luck!

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L.W.

answers from Kansas City on

I've got an 8, 10, and 12yo, boy girl boy. I've done it both ways (sent and not sent to preschool). Later, I even worked in one. Here are some thoughts for and against. Con: you're talking numbers, letters and colors, etc. These are things you can do on your own, riding along in your car, talking about life for free. Preschool tuition could go to other family needs. If you eventually have another kid, it's a hassle to get them out and about, let alone the extra exposure to germs. It's possible someone will always be sick. When I did not send my 1st kid, I just followed his interests on any given day. I talked to him like a person, not a baby, and I used words that he might not understand and he would ask me what they meant. He's now in the gifted ed, but who knows if that's nature or nurture. At the time, I told him he was "homeschool preschooled" but not because I did intentional structure - I just wanted him to be able to tell his preschooled friends something. I just hung out with him and I loved experiencing his learning and thinking.
On the other hand, when that kid got on the bus for 1st grade, the other 2 looked at me like they were ready to make playdough and all sorts of other stimuli. I put them in my church's preschool in the same class rightaway just to have something to do. They loved playing together when they weren't in school, too. I know some of my criteria might make me sound selfish but I believe that preschool enrollment can be more of a social pressure than any promise of future academic success. If your current lifestyle gives you 1:1 time with him, I say run with it. You're the best teacher for him now.(Later, algebra may be a different story!) :-)
If you do choose preschool, look for a school that values a theory called DAP or is accredited. Be aware of "artwork" that is really teacher-directed and patterned where all the kids' projects look the same. Ward Parkway Preschool is an excellent candidate. Hope that helps.

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L.M.

answers from St. Louis on

My son was at a home daycare until he was 2. At that age I could tell that he needed more stimulation than he was getting at the home daycare where there were only 2-3 other children so I signed him up for a daycare/preschool (they taught him so much!) The waiting list was 6 months so began attending there at 2 1/2, it was absolutely perfect timing. He loved all the kids and commotion and activities! Maybe your son is ready for this or maybe just not yet. You'll know. L.

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C.D.

answers from Kansas City on

I have to agree with Kerry K!!! Well said!

Take advantage of the time you have with your son, because it goes by all too quickly! And if he gets to spend his time with you rather than at school, that just strengthens your relationship with him.

He is very impressionable at this time in his life. In a pre-school situation, he will be introduced to many new manorisms and habits from the other children. At home, you have more time to instill good values, manors and respect...these are all learned qualities that are not always easily taught at school.

Whatever you choose to do, remember that he is learning from you every day, all of the time. He's been doing that since the day he was born. Give him fun oppertunities to learn and play, and READ books together!!!

I have one boy in college (no pre-school) and one in High School (had to go to pre-school in order to get into a private school).

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A.W.

answers from Kansas City on

I am a preschool teacher and let me give you some advice, he is only 2, but with no brothers or sisters around it is hard for younger children to learn about sharing, at his age this is when they really get the concept. Like 2 days a week at a preschool for about 3-4 hours. But I definatly would put a child that is going into kindergarten into preschool, being a teacher, you can really tell the difference in the child who has been to preschool and there are so many things that they need to know before even going to preschool. It would never hurt. Another thing is that if a child has a seperation issue it is easier to take care of it when they are younger than when they are starting school. Even if you wait till he is 3 or 4 it is a good idea. They have a much better time learning when they are with friends around them. Preschool sets the foundation for the kindergarten years. BEST of LUCK!!!

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S.D.

answers from Topeka on

Hello,My son is 4 I thought about sending him to preshcool at the age of 2 as well I'am a stay @ home mom of 2 since we don't go to any playgroups with other mom's or children and the only interaction was my nephew and nieces I thought it was a good idea so I enrolled him at 4 he loves it he want's to go all the time did I mention he doesn't like to talk to strangers or even like to engage in converstaion with someone he doesn't know he is doing well in preschool a few hrs a week. But if you do enroll him into preschool you'll have to figure out the day's times pt or ft,and for the new school yr he may have to 3 before he goes and potty trained.Do you live in the Topeka area if so I can give you the information on where my son goes it's not to much to go and they offer differnt times and day's even 3 sites to enroll kiddo's. Just e-mail me back if your interested in the information

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A.W.

answers from Springfield on

Hello A. I have 3 children ages 5, 4, and 2. my 5 year old went to headstart 1 year and now is in preschool this year my 4 year old in currently in in headstart i think it is a very good idea to put them in headstart/preschool because it gives the children time to inneract with other kids his/her age and with other adults. plus sometimes i myself have a difficult time getting my kids to sit down at home and study letters, numbers, or colors. but when someone else is doing if with them like the teachers they seem to WANT to learn and then come home and tell me all about it and even show me what they did that day. And the stories they tell me lol its amazing the things they say. well i hope this works out for you.

A. W.

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L.T.

answers from St. Louis on

A.,

I am also a stay at home mom of a little boy who is almost 2. I do think that preschool is necessary, especially now since children are required to know so much more when they start kindergarten than they used to. However, I do think that 2 is a bit young. Your little one will be going to school before you know it. Spend as much time with him now as you can. If you are worried about him socializing and learning to share, get together with some local moms once or twice a week and let your boy play with their kids. Take him to the play area in the mall and let him play with the kids there. I'm sure you can find a local play group. Join a play group now and then in a year or 2 send him to preschool.
Hope that helps!
L.

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M.L.

answers from St. Louis on

I have a two year old and she is in a mother's day out program. It is wonderful. I am not sure how many there are in the area. I work at one of them and originally was just planning on putting my daughter in it, but turned out working there. It is five hours long and they don't just play..they do learning too. At two and three, I like this option. I may do different at 4 and 5, but for now this has worked wonders in a lot of ways. She loves it and looks forward to it. If you want more information you may privately email me.

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B.B.

answers from St. Louis on

My youngest of 4 children is currently in Kindergarten. I would recommend at least one year of preschool. I think Kindergarten today is a lot harder than when we went to school. Schools expect children to be able to print their names and to be familiar with letters. I also think Preschool helps your child to socialize and listen to another adult (besides the parents).

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L.B.

answers from Wichita on

Unless you think he is behind...I would enjoy being home with my son! There is so much pressure for pre-school these days and at such a young age. I do think it's a good thing, both of my boys went...but not until they were 4 yrs old, the year before Kindergarten. I happened to be home with my boys at that time and we had so much fun just being home, picnics at the park, etc. ENJOY it and don't worry about what everyone else is doing/thinking!!! I think it's so important for kids to get to be kids. That's something that's hard to do once you start the school thing, my youngest is in second grade and feels pretty cheated most of the school year, he doesn't get to just PLAY! Good Luck...

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J.G.

answers from Kansas City on

I work one day a week also and I keep my son a home for preschool. I have talked to some people from the state for early childhood development and they say the only thing the children are lacking sometimes are social skills but are generally higher on the abc, numbers that stuff if they are taught at home. I know it can be challanging when everyone else is sending thier kids but if you have time to work with him and maybe get in a playgroup or go to the library storytime where he interacts with other kids I think its great. I have a child who will be 4 tomorrow and my other son will be 2 in april and I love working with them at home and it is amazing how much they are like little sponges. I feel it is a matter of personal preference but wont hurt the child either way. Hope this helps, and if you are looking for someone to get together with or have any questions feel free to email

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J.R.

answers from Lafayette on

how could it possibly be better for him then being mothered by his mother? hell have plenty of school time...why rush it if you dont have to

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S.G.

answers from Springfield on

A.,
I was a stay at home mom with two preschoolers. I had to go to work part time and had never really wanted to send my kids to day care. I enrolled my 4 year old in a 3 half-days a week pre-school and it was the best decision. It provided peer socialization, a chance to learn from someone other than me, ways to share with others, and prepared her for entering kindergarten with less seperation anxiety. The next year, I enrolled my 2 year old for just two half-days a week because I wanted her to have the same benefits. They went to school with some of those kids from preschool for the next twelve years. An added benefit is that you can now run errands or go to the grocery store sans kids and not feel guilty! I also joined a mom's prayer group that met during that time which was a great support to me and helped me be a better mother.

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M.M.

answers from Springfield on

With both my kids people pressured me (at least that is the way it seemed to me) to put my son in preschool. He was a smart boy and I didn't see any reason to put him in preschool and after I did I regretted it. He was bored because as he told me, he already knew everything they were teaching him. With my daughter I haven't sent her, I've been teaching her at home and she will start kindergarten in the fall and I feel good about not giving into the people who dissaprove of me for not sending her. They have tons of cousins and we have playgroup and other activities so a lot of opportunities for social development. Do what you feel comfortable with.

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M.B.

answers from Springfield on

Two is so young and if you don't want to send him yet, don't! If you want him to socialize with other kids maybe a mom's group or a tumbling class would be good. He would have fun and you could be with him. I waited until my girls were 3 for pre-school and then only two, 3 hour days a week. They will have plenty of time for school, and you only get them to yourself so much while they are little! :)

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A.S.

answers from St. Louis on

If you don't feel comfortable with it, then don't. Something else to consider would be mothers-day-out programs that will do mornings once or twice a week, or exchanging sitting with another mom so that your child gets socialization time without you. I think it's good to have the kids around other kids without you-- our son is an only child, and needed to figure out other kids-- but right now if you can keep him with you and entertained, then do it. Once he goes to school, he's there for at least 13 years...

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R.P.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi, A.! Pre-school is not necessary at this age if you are socializing him and giving him plenty of time and attention at home. In fact, the one on one attention at this time is wonderful. There are plenty of experiences you can offer your child...Wonderscope, indoor play periods at centers like the Powell Center, parks, and the list goes on. Are there any other kids in your area that moms and kids could paor up with once in a while? Parents are the first teachers and many children now a days don't get much imput here. Don't feel pressured. Enjoy your time together! It goes by too fast! A former teacher

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A.K.

answers from St. Louis on

We got the same barrage of "advice" when our son was around 2. He's now almost 4 and we are just starting to seriously consider preschool.

I think it depends on your child's situation. Are you both active in playgroups so he gets a lot of socialization? Do you work with him at home (or do you plan to) on preschool concepts like colors, letter, numbers, etc? Do you go on "field trips" to the zoo, botanical garden, science center, magic house, etc?

If so, I would save your money and wait to start preschool. There's not much he can get from preschool that he can't get from learning from you and playing with friends.

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A.B.

answers from Kansas City on

A.,

We went through Parents as Teachers for preschool. It was free and all we had to do was take our son and pick him up. It was mon.-thurs. At the time he was 3. That year they didn't have to be potty trained and he was a late bloomer of potty training. (was potty trained by 3 month before his 4th b-day) But now they have to be potty trained. They also have to be 3 by aug. 1. My youngest two kids won't be able to go till they are at least four if i did send them. My oldest at the time loved preschool. And personally, if you send a child to a daycare that teaches preschool, i think it's a waste of time and money. I can watch my own kids for free and teach them what they need to know. My oldest already knew most of the stuff he was taught in preschool anyway, and the only reason why we sent him was for him to be able to follow someone else's instruction and authority besides my husband and i, and he was having problems with being really shy. The school really helped him and this fall he starts kindergarten. I'm soooo excited. Last year we didn't send him to preschool. (We were in the process of moving off base and i had our 3rd child.)

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M.G.

answers from Kansas City on

My 3 year old is in preschool, but her older brother didn't go until he was 4. It really depends on the child. My son played with other kids his age regularly so preschool didn't seem that important. My daughter however doesn't really have any family or friends her age and is a momma's girl so her getting out and playing with other kids was important. But they also learn alot too. It might be nice to have a break a couple days a week for a few hours. It just depends on your situation. I hope that helped.

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M.E.

answers from St. Louis on

Dear A.,

I don't know about you, but time with my kiddos is gold. I wouldn't trade it. I also thought about preschool for my little girl, but didn't really want to. There is a 6-week "preschool"/child development lab through the high school that we do a couple times a year. It is just enough to give her a fun taste of preschool, but temporary enough for me. Maybe there's something like that in your area? We also do plenty of educational and creative projects at home (there are several wonderful Montessori-at-home books that have awesome ideas, and fun family websites with ideas), so it's not like she's missing out on skill-building. And we have lots of other moms and playgroups, so she gets plenty of socializing. The best part is that we get to be together for it. Good luck!

M.

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L.D.

answers from St. Louis on

He is too little for preschool. Try a Mothers Day Out program with a church. They are 1-2 days a week for a few hours. This is great interaction and preperation for when it really is time to talk preschool

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W.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi A.,

Well I think you can go either way on this, for instance.
I'm a home child care provider and I have 4 kids, my oldest 2 did not attend preschool. I sent my 2nd child to summer school the summer before he started Kindergarten, when I sent him he knew some of his letters and knew how to write his name, he is also left handed (I had no idea on how to teach him to write his name) but now he is in 1st grade and he is doing a really good job. The same with my oldest who is 16 yrs old and is getting A's in geometry and Algebra along with his other classes.

Now I have a 3 1/2 old daughter of my own and I also watch a little girl who is 2 1/2. I started to notice that they were becoming really board. So for 2 hours a day we are going over are letters, numbers, colors, counting, sorting, matching and using scissors. We have been doing this 6 months now and my daughter can write her name count to 20, say all of her alphabet, recognize all capital letters and lower case. Knows all of her colors and shapes.

The 2 1/2 yr old, can count from 1 -13, say all of her letters capital and lowercase. Knows all of her shapes, knows the letters to spell her name.

Modt preschools will not take kids unless they are potty trained, that being said you might a wait a year. On the other hand if you are looking more at a place where he can go for more socialization (only at this point) you might look at an In-Home daycare, you might look for one that has both, socialization with all different age kids but also works with the kids at the same time.

I don't think at this point since your son is 2 that there is anything to worry about. Yes kids need to know their ABC's but at the sametime there is nothing harmful about being a kid.

Here are also some points I would like to point out. With your son being at home with you there are things you could work on at home such as good communication skills, working on pronouncing what things are. The other thing is working on colors, shapes, and body parts.
If you go to www.first-school.ws it has some pretty good alphabet coloring sheets you could print of for him along with shapes.
He can learn from you at this point just as well as he can learn from someone else.

I think it is also a personal choice and depends on each individual child.

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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

Follow your heart! If you're not interested in sending him to preschool, DON'T! YOU are your child's best and favorite teacher. You can do all sorts of activities (simply incorporate him into ANYTHING you do all day) that preschool couldn't replace. He can get social time during play-dates or at the park. YOU can teach him to share, and wait and play by himself and with others...all at home. These years are SO valuable and the clock can't be turned back. Soak up this season while you have him all to yourself. :) Good luck!

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A.S.

answers from Kansas City on

I have a 2 year old who is not in preschool. I think the main benefits of preschool are the social interaction, and the learning prep for kindergarten. And these are two elements that you can provide for him without the expense of preschool by seeking out other social interaction opportunities through playgroups, or perhaps at a church, or with neighbors or family. The educational aspect can be provided by you as well. I never realized until recently that preschool curriculum is available for "homeschooling."

For us, preschool doesn't fit into the budget, so no matter what popular opinion is, I've got to find another way. I think that pressure from peers or family is not a good reason to enroll your child in preschool. I believe the right reason would be because there are benefits for your child that can best be or only be offered through preschool.

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J.W.

answers from Kansas City on

We decided to send our children to Preschool so that they could get some socialization and so they would have an opportunity to learn from someone other than myself (who is at home with them 24/7) so that they would be ready when the did start Kindergarten. However, we did not put them in Preschool until they were 3 years old. I also have a Day Care parent who is a teacher that says you can really tell which kids went to preschool and which didn't. She highly recommends some type of preschool so that kids learn some more structure and it is foriegn to them when "big kid" school starts. Our daughters started out just going to part-time preschool on Tues/Thurs and then are in Pre-K (M/W/F) this year. Good Luck. I am sure your son would enjoy it.

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T.F.

answers from Kansas City on

I highly recommend that you send your child to Sunshine Preschool on Shawnee Mission PKWY
I didn't send my 1st child to preschool and regret it. He has always been behind his peers. My 2nd I sent to Monticello Christian Children's Center. He seemed to be right on track. I sent my 3rd to Preschool at the Elementary School when she was 3 and wasn't happy with the results or the academics,at 4 I sent her to Monticello Christian Children's Center and the Curriculum had changed since her brother had been there. she was placed in a class with children who were younger that her and still talked baby talk. She was bored and not challenged enough. I pulled her out a after a few months and placed her at Sunshine preschool which was highly recommended by all my friends. I was pleasantly pleased with the results. They have an excellent curriculum even spanish and french. My daughter is now in Kindergarten and we just had parent teacher conferences and she scored way above average her teacher was very pleased with her progress. I give all the credit to Sunshine preschool. They are amazing!
The social development that they receive from being around other kids is worth it too. My oldest had a hard time making and keeping friends, my last 2 have no problems and have a ton of friends.
Good luck in your decision! You know what is best for the two of you. It is only a few hours a day and he will thank you later!
T.
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D.H.

answers from Kansas City on

As a former teacher I can tell you that the children who have gone to preschool do much better in kindergarten than those that have not. Preschool prepares them for kindergarten. It teaches them to follow directions in a group setting, sharing with others, following the directions of another adult besides their parents or grandparents, prepares them to be away from mom and dad for a while, and when it comes to the abc's and 123's, kindergarten is really different now, kids need to know this stuff before kindergarten. In our district they are learning to add and subtract in Kindergarten. He doesn't need to go everyday, but 2 to 3 times a week would be beneficial. And when he does start Kindergarten you don't want him to go into shock when he has to stay in school all day everyday. Shop around, but start now, their are waiting lists. Oh, and find a program that offers, music, P.E., art, etc...the changes from teacher to teacher will help them also, since now they do not stay with the same teacher all day.
He doesn't need to be two to go to preschool. He can go one year and be just fine. Depending on when his birthday is, is when you should consider putting him in.

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L.C.

answers from Kansas City on

You really have to make that decision for yourself. I remember when people started asking me that same question with my oldest, and you do start to doubt your own decision making ability. However, my son didn't go to preschool, he is now 5 and will start Kindergarten next fall. He is reading and doing addition and socializes great. I think it depends on what is best for you and your child. Preschool can be great, but it can also be stressful for children too. He has his whole life to be in school. I would say cherish these moments you have with him. They go too fast! However, as I said before you are the best judge for what you do with your son. Make a decision and stand firm on it. Trust me, people are going to give you there opinions on every choice you make as a parent, whether you ask or not!

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A.W.

answers from St. Louis on

I have a 2 year old girl who is enrolled in a Parents As Teachers Program. This program is through the school district. We have playgroup twice a week where the children can work on their social skills. My 4 year old was in the program until he was 3 when he qualified for the Pre-K program in the school. Check your school district. I love this program, especially for those moms that aren't working. Depending on the district they go on field trips as well.

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S.V.

answers from St. Louis on

A., I was a preschool kids and I LOVED it. I have two toddlers now. My son is two and my daughter is one, and I definitely plan on putting them in preschool. I think it may have even helped me, because I was "gifted" and put in advanced classes since third grade. I won so many awards, science, math, you name it. Then in junior high, I won the "most intelligent" notable in my class. I wander if I would have been such a smart kid if I hadn't been put in preschool. I think it may have also helped that I had an older sister to learn from and my mom ran her own daycare from home so I learned from all the kids since I was little.

I'm running my own child care from home now and plan on preschooling my kids. I guess I'm following my mom's footsteps. I hope my kids end ahead in their classes for it!

Preschool is NOT letting some one else raise your kids for you. I raise my kids, and also babysit others' kids all day mon-fri. I don't know of a preschool for 2-yr-olds, but once your child is potty-trained and can say his ABC's (usually age 3), Preschool is a wonderful social experience to get them ready for the real thing and it is FUN for them. If he doesn't like it, that's another story. I would try to talk to the child to understand why he doesn't like it. Maybe some one is bullying him, or maybe he just needs some reassurance.

Why dont you try asking HIM what he wants to do. I know I wanted to go to preschool when I was a kid, I was actually excited about it, because I got to be like my big sister.

Maybe take him by one and let him see the other kids playing, and get him excited about school.

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A.M.

answers from Lawrence on

You can teach your child so much at home. He needs your love and attention at this age. ABC's are not as important as the TLC you can give him!
I have been home with all of our children and have sent them all to pre-school at 4 yrs old. Sort of a preparation for kindergarten. By then they're ready to make friends and learn, and separate from mommy.
Good luck to you and your angel.

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H.H.

answers from Kansas City on

It is not required but does seem to help children socially and prepare them for school. If you aren't working and daycare or preschool isn't needed then I would wait until the child is 4 or the year before the child would start Kindergarten and have him in a pre-K program. It is usually 3-4 hours a day and gets them prepared for Kindergarten. There are many areas that provide this program free of charge. It is in the school district so you would need to check out your local school district. I don't think preschool is a requirement for 2-3 year olds. A mothers day out program would be good for social skills.

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K.C.

answers from Wichita on

I would definitely wait. Our children are only little once. And research actually shows that the less structure, the better, for little ones. There are so many other ways for your child to socialize - try playgroups. They're lots of fun for kids of all ages. We homeschool our two sons - ages three and five - so I can definitely relate to comments about sending them to preschool. But I certainly would not be in a hurry to send my two-year old off. It sounds like you are not, either; and I applaud you for that!

K.

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D.L.

answers from Topeka on

A.,
What does your heart tell you? Don't worry about other people. I am a preschool teacher and it is not always for every child and it is not always for every parent. If nothing else, check your local churches and see if they have a MOPS(Mothers Day Out Program) so he can go to a playgroup for one morning a week so he can adjust and so can you. You only have them home with you for so long and then the world gets them for so many hours a day in school, why rush it?

Good luck,
D.(mom of 5, 12, 18 and foster children)

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S.G.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi A., I have never responded to questions posted on the net, but your delimma is one I am most interested in...

I am 70yrs old, with one son and 3 grandsons....

I come from a family of 13 children..and like my parents before, I think 12 to 18 years of school is ENOUGH!! Keep your baby home and love him to pieces...God does not promise us a tomorrow !! And life is very short~~
SG...Rosedale

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D.G.

answers from Kansas City on

A., if you don't feel like putting your child in preschool, then DON'T. We (society) start putting our children in daycare, preschool and other programs younger and younger. The best place for a child is with their parents. I am sure that you are capable of teaching your son anything that he would learn in a preschool. They grow up too soon as it is and are off before we know it. Take advantage of the time you have with him and cherish each moment. You won't regret it later when you have to let him go.

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J.J.

answers from Columbia on

I have a 1yr 3month old son. Everyone has been telling me that I need to think about this too, for when he turns 2. I don't think is is a bad idea. He needs to be around other kids his age. At this age you may be having problems with him not sharing. I think that him going to a preschool would probably help him with this. If you are worried about how he will do, and you don't really want him to be away from you. You could try staying there with him the first week for about an hour, to see how he will do. If you do not want him to be there all day, you can take him for a couple of hours while you take care of some things. If you don't feel comfortable with this at his age, then wait a year. There is nothing wrong with that. You can just take him out to play at a park, or with your friends kids (if they have any about his age).

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E.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Send him! It is a great tool to help him socialize with other kids. It will be harder for you than him, and he will love it, maybe not right away but soon after he starts. I am very proud of my almost 4 y/o. He plays well with others and after we had his baby sister he had no problems sharing us or his toys with her, he's been in a program for at least one day a week since he was 18 months old. AND it will be a nice break for you. I an't wait until my daughter is old enough to go next school year It helps me not get burned out and enjoy my time with them even more.

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L.M.

answers from Springfield on

Hi my name is L., and I have 3 kids of my own. The only reason I chose for my kids to go to PreSchool was to have some time for myself and it was worth it. Don't get me wrong I love my kids with all my heart it is just I didn't have the mind of a 2 year old and it helps with the growing process for the kids to play with others their own age. So good luck with your dicision. If you need comferting just remember he is having fun and when he gets home he can show you what he done. That is the best moment anyone could almost have.

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M.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

As a current kindergarten teacher in Orange County I can tell you that the expectations for children entering school are not what they used to be. On the first day of school they are expected to know all the letter names, spell their name and write it, count to 10 and know the numbers to 10 out of order, count objects to 10, know all the flat shapes, make an AB pattern, know what same and different mean, etc. And that's just scratching the surface of the standards for completing preschool! The demands of kindergarten are higher than ever so the job of parents to get their kids prepared is so very important. I feel that children need time to play and develop skills that go along with getting along with others. They also need to know how to solve problems and work independently as well as in a setting with other kids. They need to know how to follow directions from adults and how to sit and listen to a story or other guided instruction when the time comes. Is it important that they know their letters? Yes. Does early childhood education make a difference in a child's kindergarten experience and overall school readiness? Yes. But we have to also remember that toddlers to 4 year olds are discovering the world and it is our job to let them do that. They (and you!) will never get the time back to just play and enjoy life without the stress of school. So, this is my opinion...
I feel that a child should go to at least 1 year of preschool (half-day or full day) before they go to kindergarten. It will help them learn how to go to school and the transition to kindergarten will be easier. I also feel that as a parent you know your child the best. If you feel that your child is socially and emotionally ready for more preschool at an earlier age, then go for it. On the other hand, if your child is struggling in the preschool setting and the teacher recommends that they stay in preschool longer before going to kindergarten, then consider another year of preschool. I have seen many children come to kindergarten when they are not ready and it sets them on a path of struggling through school because they are not emotionally, socially, developmentally ready for the demands of school. I have a 2 1/2 year old right now and I am also considering preschool for him in some capacity. I haven't decided yet what we're going to do but I know it's not an easy decision...

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C.J.

answers from St. Louis on

Placing your 2yr old in early childhood will enhance his growth and development. He needs that social interaction with other diversed children. Sincerely Cyn

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S.U.

answers from St. Louis on

Dear A., When my son was three I decided to send him to pre-school and the reason being he was an only child. I believed sending him would teach him to be around other kids his age and to learn to share things. I sent him the next year also because he enjoyed it so much the first year. I also believe that pre-school helped him with social skills. Pre-school also gives your child the extra advantage over children who don't go. The children learn so much to give them the extra step to preparing them for school.

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L.F.

answers from St. Louis on

I know. I didn't go to preschool when I was young either, but things have changed. I think it would be best for your little one to go. They learn so much. Not only the basics, ubt actually the structure of going to school too. It would be a wise move on your part to start researching differnt preschools. Good luck.

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J.D.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi A. My grandson went to pre-school at 3 mom wasn't going to but decided she would try it and see how he does,at the time she was not working and he was not around kids that much so she went ahead and did it for that reason plus some other reasons. the first two or three weeks was not good but found out it was the bus ride there and back. The teacher said he was doing great in school and she thought the bus ride was upsetting him because he was om the bus 45min there and hour home. well I babysit for 3 other 3 year old and they are doing real good but my 3 yaer old I have 4 more during the day they all may go but the one girl I have mom may have her wait one more year she is a very independent smart girl but the mom does not want her to get bored so I figure if your little boy is backwards shy and not around very many kids try it but give it at least a month that is what my daughter did she about gave up but she didn't she took him to school and he rides the bus to my house and we see he has blossoned and he loves mrs. Stanford so good luck their are pros and cons

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J.K.

answers from St. Louis on

A.,
You know your child best. Go with your heart. Go look at a few preschools in your area. If you have a Montessori preschool in your area I highly recomend them. Montessori uses Hands on Learning. The child learns at his own pace. I have seen 5 year old boys reading!!! and doing Math.

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J.A.

answers from Kansas City on

A. - At that age, preschool is just another word for "daycare". Mommy should enjoy being his teacher at such a young age. You little boy can easily socialize with other kiddos in playgroups, etc. We plan to send our twins to pre-school the school year before they go to kindergarten and that's only part-time. Don't worry what other say to you or ask you. You'll never get this time back and the parents are kids greatest teacher at this age.

PS - I just ready Tommie P's post and WOW.. I SOOOOO agree! I sometimes think when mom's feel guily they like to "recruit" others so they don't feel as bad.

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B.D.

answers from St. Louis on

The nice thing about preschool, is that it is only 2 days a week at that age, and for a very short time. If you or your child aren't ready yet, you can wait another year, and just do one year of preschool. I think it's valuable social time for them, and a great warm-up for both of you to get ready for kindergarten. If you try it this year, and he's very unhappy, you can pull him out and try next year. Do what feels right for both of you. Good Luck!

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R.W.

answers from Springfield on

Hi A..

I recommend keeping him home as long as possible! There are so many things you can do together (reading, playing, etc) that will give him the personal bonding and skills.

Perhaps you could put him in a Mother's Day Out program on the one day you do work.

You will treasure the time you have with him! Too soon he will be gone to school!

R. W

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S.R.

answers from Wichita on

I would send him, IF he is ready. It helps a lot with social anxiety. But sometimes kids are just not ready. I personally waited with mine (all 6) until they were 4. I feel that sometimes kids are in school too long if they start too young.

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D.W.

answers from Kansas City on

They usually don't take pre-schoolers until at least 3-4 give it some time My Daughter put her 3 yr old in preschool & Skye learned to share with others & to respect the teachers

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J.R.

answers from St. Louis on

I believe preschool is a personal choice. I placed my 2 little ones in preschool at the age of 3. They loved it, including the socialization with the other children. I used the preschool associated with our elementary school and have no regrets. You have a choice on now many days a week you want to send you child. Good Luck, but don't stress about it.

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R.C.

answers from St. Louis on

Preschool would be good for him, as he will learn how to socialize with other children and share better. He will also learn many helpful concepts which will help him when he begans regular school.

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L.G.

answers from St. Louis on

You should definitely give preschool some serious thought. My daughter started in August (after turning 3 in June). She has developed so many new skills and is much more focused and social with other kids. My daughter is an only child and I would definitely recommend preschool for other only children to help them with those "social graces." She is also talking more, writing and drawing better and becoming more aware of things around her. It has been an all-around great decision to send her and she will be returning next year as well. Good luck with your decision.

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K.A.

answers from Kansas City on

it's always a good idea for nothing more to socalize him and get him used to being away from you. It also gives him a "leg up" becasue he'll learn the basics. plus it'll give you some free time to yourself so it's a win/win.

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J.L.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi A.!
My son is almost 2, and i actually just signed him up for 2 mornings a week at a private in home daycare. I hated the fact of leaving him, but i think he really needs to play with other kids and learn sharing and other things that i know im not able to teach him as well. Its only about 3 hours a day so i dont feel so bad plus he thinks its his "special friend time". Hope this helps

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J.G.

answers from Springfield on

A.,
I think you need to do what is best for you and your family... I stayed home with my son for the first two and 1/2 years but realized for me it was time to go back to work and felt he'd do better being in a structured environment with other kids. He is an only child and I'm NOT a teacher and felt this would be best for him... so now I've been working full time for the past 2 years and it was the best decision for me and my son... every family is different and you need to do what is best for you... you don't need to keep up with the "JONESES" when it comes to raising kids, just do the best you can. J.

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M.S.

answers from Kansas City on

At first I was very against sending my oldest daughter to preschool. I thought since I was a SAHM that was my job - to teach her the things she needed for Kindergarten. However, after her sister was born and she was 2 1/2 - I realized that preschool would help her socially and I no longer had the time to devote to just her everyday. I sent her, she loved it, I loved it and we were all happy. I think this needs to be a personal decision and you can always try it out - if it doesn't work out for you or your child, you can quit. Unfortunately there is a lot of peer pressure if your child is the only one of his playmates that is not going but only you know what is right for your own child. Good luck!

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A.L.

answers from Kansas City on

A.:

Usually children start preschool around 3 and yes, it is a great idea. It will give your son some independence, let him try on some social skills and have fun with kids his own age. Plus, children do better in regular school, if they attend preschool initially. Make sure you check out the preschool (licensed, accredited, open door policy...), and maybe just start part-time.
A. L

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B.S.

answers from St. Joseph on

I don't know how attached your son is to you, but...

I didn't put my youngest in preschool ~ and he cries EVERY day when I leave him now....In hindsight, I wish I would have started him in Pre-k just a couple days a week to acclimate him to school... I don't think full time but maybe a couple of days, or half-days...just to get used to the idea of school...

B.

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C.S.

answers from St. Louis on

In this day and age, preschool is ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. Otherwise, your child will be at a disadvantage because most everyone else in his kindergarten class will have one or two years of preschool -- for learning, for socializing, for learning how to follow rules, for learning how to sit still in a group situation, etc. Preschool is incredibly valuable, a bit costly, but definitely a requirement. And he'll love it and look forward to it!

--C.

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