Needing Some Assurance and Advice

Updated on April 14, 2009
A.M. asks from Overland Park, KS
17 answers

I am a new mom, like some on this site. I have asked for all you to help me before and I need ti again.

It was always easier being a nanny, than it is to care for your own children. Especially when the ones you cared for could already walk and talk.

OUr little girl is almost 7 months and my main concern is she has little interest in learning to roll over. We do tummy time every day whenever she is not eating or sleeping. She actually loves it because she can watch puppy and kitty walk around. But she has no desire to turn from one way or the other. She has done it a few times before both ways, but not consistently. Yes, I know each child will develop at their own pace, and yes she was a preemie, but it is hard as a new mom when you want the best for your child and you are not sure how to get to that point for them.

She is sitting up on her own for a few minutes right now too, and is teething. THe tooth just won't pop through. Worst part is you can feel it, but it wont come out! So she gets cranky very easily.

We also see parents as teachers each month and the lady who we see is very impressed with her. The ped. doesnt seemed concerned either, but I am because I was a late walker (16 months) when I was a baby.

Any help/advice would really help me right now.

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T.M.

answers from St. Louis on

As a mother of a preemie also (5 weeks early) you have to take into account her actual due date and count from there not when she was actually born. My daughter was late also at everything (so far - she's 17 months now). She didn't start walking until 15-16 months old. Believe me, don't worry about it - she will do it when she is ready. If you are giving her the opportunity that is all you need to do. Once she does start rolling over - you will probably wish she didn't (especially at nap/bedtime!). Don't worry and enjoy her other milestones. Good luck.

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M.B.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi! I know your worried about her. My daughter didnt walk until she was 14 months, and looking back at it now, I wasnt so much concerned about her well being because the kid was healthy and very smart, but everyone elses baby was walking and mine wasnt. I felt like I didnt do something as a mom, like I failed her somehow. Your daughter is fine! My daughter couldnt walk into she was 14 months but she could talk circles around other kids her age. I dont know if this is the case, but dont buy into the compition, like my baby is doing this, is your baby doing this? I know you have heard it before but, they really do, do it at their own pace and thats no big deal. And her being a preemie she may do things a little later because even though shes 7 months old, shes really not (kinda). You know? She will do it. And honestly, you say you didnt walk until you were 16 months, well does that have any effect on you now? Probably not, its no big deal. So being a first mom, I understand how you feel, but I promise she is ok.

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K.K.

answers from St. Louis on

We do all worry about these things, you are not alone. However, I would say to speak to your doctor about it so you know for sure if it's fine or an issue. And, we had a great program here called Birth to Three and they would evaluate. (As a first time mom, I absolutely loved it.) You might call your health department to check it out. They should be able to put you in touch with the right people. It was not income based and it was free. It helped me to not sweat it!!

P.S. Just FYI, I think she's doing just fine! :) And so are you!

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L.B.

answers from St. Louis on

A.,

Im wondering if you were a late walker and your ok - why does it concern you? The only advice I have for rolling over is don't make it so easy for her to see you. She'll want to see your face. Preemies are almost always what we think of as behind because they were too early. It doesn't mean anything negative - it's just the way it is. If you go by normal birth date she is probably on track. Try not to drive yourself crazy with this stuff. It's not important. Does she smile, does she coo, can she hear, can she see, does her heart beat right, does she have fingers, toes, - wow she is fabulous!!! Thank the Good Lord :)

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G.N.

answers from St. Louis on

Those are just guidelines that the kids should be at but all kids do develop at their own pace and being a preemie it will take her a little longer than non preemie child to do. If you are really concerned talk to your peditrician but I would give it a couple of more months and work with her as you said you do lots of tummy time. I am sure she will be rolling back n forth in no time.

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S.L.

answers from Kansas City on

I am certain that your daughter is just fine. I wonder if you had a reason for walking late? I had a daycare child once that was bow legged. I had another child that had a foot that turned in. My last daughter has both femur bones that turn inward a bit. All 3 of these kids walked later than the average kids that I've had.

If your Ped and the parents as teachers people are fine with her, I'm sure she's just perfect. Anyway, all these kids that had issues are also perfect now. The boy with a foot that turned in is in Iraq in the military. My 8 year old is great and the other child is fine too.

Suzi

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K.B.

answers from Wichita on

Good Morning A., You hit the nail on the head already sweety. All babies do things at different rates. With your sweet Angel being a preemie, I think she is doing Wonderfully. She is sitting Up, rolling some, watching things move by her. Awesome. Please don't stress over the walking yet. Our eldest walked around 13-14 months, our youngest walked at 8 1/2 months. I was NOT ready for the little guy to walk yet. Our Gr daughter (9)didn't really walk she went right to Running. Our carpet wasn't stretched correctly in the hallway so we had what we called Tia Speed bumps, they would only slow her down a little bit.
Austin (8) walked at 13 months, Asher (4 1/2) was almost a yr when he started walking. Corbin (4) Walked around 11 months, and Baby Zane (17 mo) Was 14 months. Zane is still a Weeble Waddler and he does fall down.. WOW I am Shocked I remembered all of that..*laughing*

Keep playing with her A., roll her if you want, keep doing tummy times where she reaches for toys etc.. She is doing things at her speed, and in my mind she is Doing Awesome.

God Bless you always, Your a Great mama to be concerned but Please do not stress it. Have fun and relax. Not to scare ya, there will be harder things down the road...lol So deep breath, exhale and smile a lot.
K. Nana of 5

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A.H.

answers from Springfield on

Take your concerns to your child's pediatrician.

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S.V.

answers from St. Louis on

If she has already rolled over a few times, then I think she is fine and just doesn't like 'tummy time'

My youngest is almost 4 months old and always hated tummy time so I wouldn't make her do it. Well she just figured out a few days ago how to roll over to her tummy, but can't roll back yet.

I have even known of one kid that learned how to move around scooting on his back instead of crawling lol... there is no law that says kids have to learn the same way as every one else. He grew up fine, still learned how to walk fine and is a normal boy.

I think she is fine, she has shown that she can do it. Maybe she will be a back-scooter, or maybe she will start enjoying 'tummy time' more when she is strong enough to lift herself up off the ground.

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D.M.

answers from St. Louis on

Hi A.,

As the mom of a preemie I know how you are feeling. I'm sure the doctor have explained adjusted age to you. Go by how old she should be as far as developmental things not her actual age. Also as the mother of three I can tell you it is true know child developes the same. my second child never crawled, EVER, he went staight from tummy time to pulling up and walking. So she might decide she doesn't want to practice rolling over. One day she might just crawl off.
I'm sorry I can't help with the teething except use ibprophen. Make sure you check her doesage at every Dr. appointment because it is important to go by weight and not age with preemies. Good Luck.

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A.B.

answers from Kansas City on

Well, if you were a late walker, then your daughter may be, too. Unless your late walking was due to a physical problem, I wouldn't worry: it is probably normal for your family.

And I noticed something you said: "it is hard as a new mom when you want what is best for your child and you are not sure how to get there FOR them" (emphasis mine). You don't get there FOR them; you let them do it for themselves. I know you are a new mom, but just chill out and give her space and opportunity. She will be fine.

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B.C.

answers from Joplin on

Teething can really throw a monkey wrench in things. Sounds like she is doing fine though developementally < patience Mama :) >
One thing I always did for tummy time was make sure there were interesting eye catching toys on either side of my babies so that they had to turn their head to see them, or roll towards them. Tummy time should be fun, get down on their level with them, you can even lay on your back and have her on your tummy as well. try starting with her on her back sometimes, seemed my kiddos always rolled from back to stomach first.

As for the tooth, I hate to discourage you, but I have seen teeth that were so close you could feel the ridge and then they went back down, seriously the teeth will pop when they are ready not before ( it sucks I know) I was told by a pediatrician that the numbing gels actually Toughen gums, I had never heard that before I had my 3rd child, so I was a lot less likely to grab for a tube of orajel with him for fear that it was true. I was also told that Ibuprofen helped with the swelling of the gums and that I could use a teeny bit of Ibuprofen to rub on the gums, I usually measured the appropriate dose and rubbed some on the gums then gave the rest of the dose when my little guy was really fussy/in pain. The little water filled teethers that can be refridgerated help, the baby terry cloth wash rags dipped in water and frozen work well too.

Teething bites = )
Good Luck
B.

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L.C.

answers from St. Louis on

My daughter wouldn't ever do tummy time and only rolled over a couple of times. Our pediatrician said it was ok because she could at least do it. She was crawling at 7 months and walking by 11 months so she hit all her milestones early. My daughter rolls over all the time now (13 months) especially when I am trying to change her diaper!! My friends daughter who was a rolling machine (now also 13 months) doesn't walk yet. I just chalked it up to my daughters preference. I wouldn't woory about it if your pediatrician wasn't. Babies are all so different. I hope this helps or at least eases your mind. It is hard wired in us mothers' to worry! lol

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K.C.

answers from Wichita on

How early was she? Going from her adjusted age (how old she would be if she was born on her due date) might help ease your mind. But if you are truely concerned & your dr. doesn't acknowlege your concern then get a second opinion from a different dr. (this doesn't mean that you have to change dr.'s). Find a chart online or from your dr. that shows how a baby develops (at __ months they should be doing ____).
As many people will tell you all babies develop differently, but if you have a gut feeling that something is wrong - go with it!

God bless!

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K.K.

answers from St. Louis on

I, like you, am a first time mom and my son is 9 months old. I remember being worried that he was not rolling over, or sitting up, and I was even worried because his teeth had not come in yet. Let me tell you, it all happens overnight, I am not kidding...give it a few more weeks and you will be super surprised! My son rolled over and a month later was crawling, and now he is pulling himself up and moving very fast around the house, and has 5 teeth! You are right where I was around 7 months...it will happen I promise! :)

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M.G.

answers from Lawrence on

The only advice I have is in regards to the teething..I've heard that using orajel on the gums can actually harden the gums, making it even harder for the tooth to come through. If you havent tried them yet, I've found that teething tablets (all natural) work pretty well.

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H.S.

answers from St. Louis on

Your beautiful little girl will turn over when she is good and ready. Since the pedi is not concerned, I would just enjoy this time with her. Come next year....you will miss how it used to be!

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