Needing Daily Words of ENCOURAGEMENT!!!!

Updated on February 08, 2009
A.P. asks from Beaumont, TX
40 answers

Seeking encourage from a person who knows what it feel like to go to College at age 45 after 30 years.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

Welcome to the club. A., I was in my mid 30's when I decided to go back. My youngest had just start kinder. I was only going to get my Associates. I had started college right out of high school, transferred a couple of times and met my husband. I was only going to sit out a semester but life happened. 13 years later, I went back. It was funny because my kids would ask "mom do you have any homework?" "If you do, why is the TV on?" Wow they were listening! Who knew! You will be amazed at how many older students there are. I decided to continue and got my BS in 2001. My kids were very proud of my accomplishment and I was proud of myself. I showed my kids that an education is important at any age. You can do it A.!

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L.C.

answers from Corpus Christi on

Wow! That's awesome! Good for you! :-)

I'm 36 and thinking of going to school too. I'm hesitant, but you've given me hope. Thanks!

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C.J.

answers from McAllen on

I'm not that age, but I just wanted to let you know that the age of knowledge never goes stale. Everyone, anywhere, anytime can learn new things.
If you ever need to talk you can email or IM me: ____@____.com. I work from home, so almost always near my laptop.

GOOD LUCK!

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D.S.

answers from Houston on

I don't know about going at 45 after 30 years, but i do know about going at 39 after 14 yrs. I've had to pray alot, to ask God to give me knowledge, make me willing, and many other prayers. I am only in 2 classes, one being developmental pre-algebra and english 1302. The math is ok so far, because it is so easy right now, but it is about to be much more complicated. The english(which is a good subject for me) is more hard, and i thought it was because i had been out of school so long. I have a hard time putting my thoughts together, but when i do, it begins to flow.

I was having a hard time keeping up with the homework assignments, and i was thinking it was because it had been since '95 that i took the english class that goes before the one i am in now. I found out yesterday that it isn't just me, almost no one in our class is able to keep up. Our teacher started asking if we needed more time for assignments and if she just needed to slow down in general. Everyone said yes, so that let me breathe a sigh of relief.

What i can tell you is this: i'm constantly wondering and doubting my abilities. When it comes right down to it, i'm actually doing a pretty good job. All my insecurities come out, all my fears, and then i remember that God is in charge and it will happen the way it should. I can only do my part to the best of my ability, and sometimes the best of my ability changes, depending on the day. We can do this, and we will!

It takes courage to go back to school after so long, and older students have advantages in some areas. We have been out in the real world, so we know the value of an education. Just continue to put one foot in front of the other, suit up and show up, and the rest will fall into place. That doesn't mean it will be easy, but God never gives me more than i can handle. It just feels like it, LOL. I also have a 15 month old, my first child, and i found out i was expecting right when i was about to go back to school. But it definitely feels like i have been in school for parents for the past 15 months. Kind of like my very own version of Parenting for Dummies. Becoming a partent at 38 is the hardest thing i have ever had to do, so i know school can be done. If i can do it, you can do it. Email me any time.

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M.V.

answers from Houston on

All I can say is GOOD FOR YOU!!!! I'm not quite your age, but I have 2 kids and a husband, and have been working on my 4 year degree (bachelor's) for almost 8 years because it isn't feasible for me to go full-time. I just tell myself- slowly but surely, I'll make it, and it'll be SO worth it!!! So, the same to you, whether you're 45 or 25, it'll be worth your hard work and time in the future when you look back and see all that you've accomplished despite the odds that others say you have against you! Good Luck! I'll be praying for you, please do the same for me...I need it! LOL!

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D.J.

answers from Austin on

I was 20 years out of High School, a single parent with a middle school age daughter and just barely making my house note (with no child support) . . . It is scarey and very easy to tell yourself that you are "hurting someone" by being away . . . but that is wrong . . .

In the long run, your children will respect you for trudging it out and going to school to better yourself! My daughter certainly does. It took me just shy of 10 years to get my Bachelors Degree . . but I did it and so can you!

Like anything else that is "good for you" or "hard" just take it one step at a time and you will make it!

Good Luck and keep that chin up!

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S.W.

answers from Houston on

Do not overload your classes. When you get your first report card you will be so pround of yourself. It is worth all the time you put in it. Get to know your class mates as they are very accepting to us older students and not only will they be a big help to you but you to them.

Again, only take one or 2 classes at first.

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D.R.

answers from Austin on

A.,
I left a good paying job to go back and get my masters degree a few years ago. Even though, I was in my late 20's and finished my masters in my 30's, I was a mother of 2 great kids and wife to an awesome husband. It was tough to leave the work force and enter back into the school routine--I thought I was going to die after my first grad school class! I was really intimidated by my peers, but soon I found out that we had more in common that I had thought and were rooting for each other! But I can totally relate to needing words of encouragement-one thing I did was start searching for inspirational quotes that would motivate me every day--google it! I also wrote down things that I came across in my readings that stuck to me.

The best piece of advice I can give you is to manage your time wisely--your school time, your mom time & your me time. And that YES you can do this-->you are just as smart as everyone in the room and that life experience can outweigh anything that can be read in a book! You are setting a great example for your sons! Their mom is awesome! Good luck!

D.
http://www.4myhappyhealthyfamily.com

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D.

answers from Houston on

I went back to college after a 14 year break. I found that my life experiences and appreciation for why I was there gave me a huge advantage over the young ones. I wanted every morsel of information I could get out of the class and I knew how it would apply to real world situations. Most times, if not for me asking questions and contributing to discussions the professor would have been talking to his/herself. I know that my questions helped the other students so don't hesitate to speak up. The confidence you bring just from having functioned in the world is very valuable. And just thank the Lord above that you don't have to worry about having your thong/crack hanging out of the back of your pants all day long. Best of luck to you. Graduation feels really good:)

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C.H.

answers from Houston on

I am a 33 yr old who just finished college while holding down a girl scout troop, 40/week job and raising a small child. If I could do it, so could you. anything you put your mind to and committ to is yours. It took a lot of sleepless nights and tears, but it was all worth it in the end. when I started school again, they gave us an article on a 90 y/o woman who never stopped learning, and finally got her doctorate at 90 yrs old while still being active in her community and family. so you can do even greater things at 40

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M.M.

answers from Houston on

Been there, done that. One phrase of advice. JUST DO IT!!

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C.P.

answers from Houston on

One of our teachers started substituting when her younger daughter started Kindergarten. She was then hired, after a couple of years, as a para-professional on our campus. We, immediately, started encouraging her to start taking college courses, because she had an aptitude for the classroom. She started taking 1 or 2 courses a semester during the school year. When her 2 daughters reached middle and high school, she started taking more courses because more courses were going on-line, but she still had to attend the college campus for other courses, an hour away. When her daughters started college, she started going summers, too, because she was starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. As things ended up, she and her older daughter graduated together last spring, she in education and her daughter (who is my daughter's age and friend) in nursing. She was so thrilled to reach this fete and we were, too, because she was hired as a teacher on our campus!
So, hang in there!

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C.C.

answers from San Antonio on

A. - take heart, this is somethign you can and will accomplish.
Things may seem tough and overwhelming at times, but there is nothing real standing in the way of your goal.
Here's is my mother's story.

My mom will be 50 next month, and she has just graduated college with a double bachelors in buisness and computer programming. She also has a teaching certificate.
When my mom was 33, my parents were still together, and my father was laid off from what had essentially been his career and went to a re-training school. My mom took a part time job as a school bus driver.
At the end of one of her shifts she was rearended by a fully loaded Mack 18-wheeler going 45mph. My mother spent the next 11 years in a wheelchair.
When my mom was 38 (and I was 17) she miraciously got pregnant! The day she was brought home fropm the hospitol with my youngest brother - she became a single mother.
My father walked out on us.
At 38 my mother was wheelchair bound, a single mother to 4 children, had no income, and required the help of a home health nurse for recovery from the pregnancy and c-section.
It was grim. We los the house to forclosure, we lost our car. I - at 17 - had to go get 2 jobs just to help with keeping us fed.

But you know what? My mom is awesome. She is stronger than strong.
The Dr.s said she wouldn;t walk again, and medicaid stopped paying for her water therapy.
So she made an arrangement with a friend who had a hot tub, she printed out her whole physical therapy routine, and she had me help her do it every morning before breakfast, and 3 days a week in the hot tub.
She sold what was left of my dads tools and belongings and used that to start a savings fund.
When she was 40 she started college. All she wanted was a bachelors -adn it was hard.
She had to take a break mroe than once because of health issues. She had to take a break mroe than once because of $$ issues. She had to livei n public housing most of the time, and relied on public trans and food stamps.

BUT SHE DID IT. My mother just graduated in Dec. My baby brother is now 10, I'm married with 3 kids, and my mom has a hoem of he own and 3 degrees instad of one. My mom WALKS. She's been out of hte wheelchair for 5 years.
My mom is having a surgery next month, and has a job waiting for her at UT.

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S.C.

answers from Houston on

Hang in there! You can do it!!! I do it too!

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M.B.

answers from Houston on

GO FOR IT GIRL!
I don't fit into your age category, but I did go to college in my late 20's and then law school in my late 20's and early 30's. I worked full time, so I had the privilege of going to school at night, with the "older" professionals who also had jobs. EVERY age was represented. I went to North Harris at first, then U of H Downtown. For me, the older the group, the better. They are more serious about doing well, have better life experience to relate to topics in class and realize that they are the ones paying for the schooling, so make it count. When I was in law school, a classmate was in his 70's. He always wanted to be a lawyer, but had never finished.. his age certainly didn't stop him! Don't worry about how old you are, or the age of the babies around you... Go for what you want and make the absolute best of it! GOOD LUCK!

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L.C.

answers from Killeen on

Again.... JUST DO IT!!

I'm in my 30's and decided to go back to school. I get lots of encouragement from my children, my co-workers, and the students that I deal with. There is nothing like my kids or my students telling me they can't wait until I'm there regular teacher.

Dive in and swim!! You can do it!!

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A.D.

answers from Austin on

I know it is difficult-been there, done that-but, the end outweighs the means. As for words of encouragement-look through a thesaurus- each and every word that has to do with encouragement and then some will be there. Then get you some different colored construction paper, tissue paper, index cards, etc., of your choosing and write those individual words on the papers, and tape them on your bathroom mirror, refrigerator, bedroom mirror, car dashboard, everywhere. Even you 12 y/o will enjoy.

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K.C.

answers from Brownsville on

I will be your amen corner. I am 62 years and went to college for the first time when I was 35 and everyone else was 18. I was a older but determined to prove I could do this thing. Each day I would tell myself "short term give up for long term gain". What I realized was that at our age we were much more focused than any young person--ie looking to party or get a boyfriend. I even can in 2nd in healthy class running the mile in 11 1/2 minutes. I had been divorced and experienced 5 mis-carrages. YOU CAN DO THIS!

Pray like it all depends on God and work like it all depends on YOU.

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D.S.

answers from Austin on

Seize the moment! You can do it! You will have your struggles but if you have the energy and can keep focused and not get discouraged it can happen. It's always been my dream to finish my degree and I was going to wait until my youngest was in high school but because of health issues I can't return to school at this time though I really wish I could. I tried going back to school way back when I was a single Mom but I let myself become overworked and discouraged. How I wish I would have perservered! I then remarried, had 2 more children, took a few more classes, but never was able to finish that either. Then my husband quit work and went back to school full time and was able to get the degrees he wanted so I couldn't do anything at that time. Now that I have the time to do it I can't because we have one child in college and another one entering next fall. We need both my and my husband's income to get by and my health is such that I can't work full-time and then take classes and study. So good luck and don't let anything stop you from pursuing your goals! You're worth it!

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J.S.

answers from San Antonio on

I am not your age nor am I in your position rigt now but I can speak from the childs point of view. My mother was in her 40's when she went back to college and I was in 4th grade. She got her nursing degree and I remember feeling so proud of her as she walked across that graduation stage. Seeing the joy of accomplishment in her eyes showed me the value of education and the value doing something for yourself. I'm sure you will have rough moments but hang in there this is but a moment and you and your family will benefit from your choice.

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E.A.

answers from Austin on

My mom graduated from college when she was 33 years old while raising 2 kids. What my brother and I loved was that she did her homework with us at night while we did ours. When we ended up in college, we would call her telling her we remembered her studying the same things. Turns out her doing that encouraged my brother and I to work hard for what we want at any age. It was a great bonding experience for all 3 of us. I think it is truly amazing that you are going back to school and showing your children not only you, but they too can achieve anything. GO FOR IT!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!

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K.M.

answers from Houston on

I went back to school when I was 44 and my sons were both in high school. Already had my AA degree and was going back to work on my BA degree (still working on it!) Take it one step at a time and try not to overload yourself with classes.

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L.M.

answers from Houston on

I'm not 45, but I went back to school at a later age. I was 34 and had a 2 year old son when I went back full time. It was tough on my family too. The semester I started, my then 15 year old step-daughter moved in with us full time. That was a strain, but without her to help my husband, I don't know if I or they would have made it through. When I graduated from high school I went for 1 1/2 years full time, then until 34 only part-time off and on. After I went back full time, it took me 3 1/2 years to get my degree. I graduated in Dec 2007. The first year I only took 12 hours per semester. After that, I poured on the juice because my goal was to finish in 3 years. I continued to work full time (part time during the semesters. In the fall, when my work was slower, I would take 18-21 hours. In the spring, when I was really busy at work, I would take 15 hours. I only had to take 1 summer class, that was the only time they offered it. I took my summer's off so I wouldn't burn out, and summer's are so busy anyway with other things going on.

I'm not going to say it wasn't tough. There were many a time I didn't think I was going to make it. End of Oct/beginning of Nov and April were always the hardest. That was when all the big semester projects/papers were due. I would get through it by telling myself only 3 more weeks and you can sleep, only 2 more weeks, then I would get it down to days.

There were times I hated missing out on family activities knowing that my little one didn't completely understand why mom was always sitting at that desk telling him to leave her alone. It broke my heart sometimes. But, I had to keep telling myself that once I was done, we would have all the time in the world to spend together.

The main thing is to keep your eye on the big goal, the light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes it is still hard to believe that I have a college degree, but I do. And looking back, it seems like it was over in the blink of an eye.

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M.H.

answers from Austin on

Good morning A.,

I read your request this morning and thought of my older sister. She's a mother of 4 and recently completed her nursing degree. Like you 45 yrs. of age so hang in there. You can do it. Remember to take time for yourself and breathe.
Just wanted you to know people do care!

M.

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T.C.

answers from Austin on

I wish I had your courage! I'm 44 and just can't get my head around doing that although it's something I've always regretted NOT doing! Best of luck to you and well done! It will all be worth it in the end!

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K.A.

answers from Austin on

My father was born in 1926. He dropped out of school after his dad committed suicide in 1937 to help his mother on the farm. When he became 18 he joined the air force. My dad didn't decide to go to school until he was over 40. He went and got his GED then got his BA and later went to UT to go to Law school. He became a very respected trial lawyer in Austin after the age of 50. He practiced until he died at the age of 82. His story has been an inspiration to me and I wanted to share it with you. His favorite phrase when he would talk about some one was, "he ain't done yet!" Meaning, don't ever judge a person, because they still have the rest of there lives to prove you wrong.
Good Job going back to school!
Your 45! You still have a whole world of opportunities in front of you. You ain't done yet!

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S.G.

answers from San Antonio on

you go girl! what an awesome gift you're giving to your boys and yourself!!! best of luck to you....you're going to be great!

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M.T.

answers from Houston on

Everyone has given you some awesome words of encouragement. I don't have much else to add but this, I am about to turn 35, in the process of going through a divorce after helping my husband finish his college education, about to experience life as a single mom again, still working full time and taking two credit classes. I realize now that it will take me longer to get my degree than planned but never give up. This is something we have to do for ourselves. I know I have better discipliine as a student now then I did when I was in high school. If I can do it you can do this too! Mind over matter. Have fun and enjoy learning!

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K.P.

answers from Houston on

I am so proud of you! You are doing something to better your family and you!

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A.L.

answers from Beaumont on

I myself even though I am only 29 sometimes feel like I am the oldest one going to college. I work at Lamar University in Beaumont and I have noticed while doing applications for them that there are plenty of older people coming to school for undergrad degrees...Don't feel bad You aren't the only one. It is hard and I work at the college....hard with 2 kids at home, hard with working full time, hard with the shuffling of after school activities....keep your head up and your books open...you will be just fine!

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L.B.

answers from Odessa on

You'll be 50 some day. You can either be 50 with a degree or 50 without one.

One saying that helped me through court reporting school was, "What the mind conceives and the heart believes, the body will achieve."

Good luck to you. I wish you all the best. Sorry about the age reminder, but it was important in the point to make. You'll look up and it will be done and you'll be so glad you did it.

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L.T.

answers from Austin on

A., Good for you - You go girl! My cousin just finished college at age 56. She had two elderly parents she had to take care of. You can do it too! I suggest that you not take more than three classes a semester unless you have help at home. I went back to school when I was in my late 30’s. I had four kids and a husband who was going through mid-life crisis. I had to make A’s and B’s because the kids we watching my every move. One used to post my report card on the refrigerator. I took five classes one semester and I don’t know how I got through that one. I organized the kids, they had to cook and do laundry. When the oldest one got her driver’s license I had them do the food shopping too. It was good for them, but you have to be willing to let go a little and eat some pretty strange meals. I kept up with the important things like who they were hanging out with and what types of people were influencing them. We all got through it just fine. Good luck.

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N.T.

answers from San Antonio on

Good for you that you decided to go back to college and at your age. It is never to late to do so. I have a good friend that got a divorce and she had been a wife and mother for all those years even though she already had a degree which she got at the age of 24. After her divorce she didn't know what she was going to do and decided to go back to school and decided she wanted to become an attorney. So she went back to law school at the age of 37. She graduated at the age of 40 and today she is a successfull attorney. Sure it was a big decision for her and she was afraid to go back after all those years but she knew it would give her a career she would love and better her life and to her not be dependent on anyone other than herself. It is tough but you will do it and do well. Just remember the years go by quickly so enjoy every minute of it. Good Luck to you. You go girl......

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M.D.

answers from Victoria on

Hello mommy in need of a boost! After getting married and having 2 kids, at the age of 28, I too decided to go back to college and get my degree. My husband works about 60 hours a week, so I really feel like a single mom. You are making a better like for you and your kids and it's an invigorating feeling to know that you can stand on your own! College means a lot more to me at this age than it ever did! It feels good to know that you are improving yourself! Age doesn't matter at all, it's just a number! What makes things difficult is being a mommy and a student! I have two boys four and five and it's not easy getting things done when they're running around, but it will be worth it in the end! Time goes quick, so buckle down now and reap the benefits later! It'll be tough, but rest asure that there are many mommies out there of all ages doing the same thing:) Good luck and God Bless You!

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D.G.

answers from Houston on

My mother just graduated college at age 60 with mostly As. After an almost 40 year hiatus she went back to get her degree.

It's never too late, and YOU CAN DO IT!

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L.G.

answers from Corpus Christi on

A.,

I began working on my BBA at 43 and felt like a dinosaur sitting there with all those 18 year olds but I quickly discovered that I knew a lot, just from living 43 years, I had watched the news, lived. My classmates soon discovered that I had something to offer and was invited into study groups, if I wasn't I began one, but gently kept them on task, or I left.

When I began college my youngest was 6 and the oldest was 17, the 4 of them were a handful but I made it clear when I needed to study, took every opportunity I could to study.

As a single parent it was tough, but I was determined, had too many friends that were barely making it financially. With all of that I began applying for scholarships, and got some really nice ones. Look for the ones that apply directly to you. In Corpus Christi the Executive Business Women International give a scholarship for "women in transition in their lives", I applied and received that one.

I leaned on my friends, some days I called them saying I can't do this and they would remind me I could and would. I never saw myself as smart but graduated Cum Laude. I did take advantage of every opportunity to do extra credit and went to prof's office for help when needed. There are tutoring centers, free, ask. I found as long as I cared my prof's were more than willing to help me but I was on top of it and didn't wait until finals week to ask for help.

You can do this. I get daily encouragement from "Proverbs 31 Woman", they send a daily e-mail. Now sometimes they are talking about improving your marriage but hey, one day I may be married and I will be ready.

Set your mind, I am going to finish. Something that helped me get over testing anxiety, keeping things in perspective, if I flunk this test, ok I don't want to, but if I do, and flunk the class (which one I did get a D) then I will take the class again, and the new grade replaced the old one, at my school. Keeping that in mind helped.

Sorry, it seems I am writing a book, and I did write a paper on getting through college, things people thought "everyone" knows, but I didn't. E-mail me and I will be happy to share with anyone who is interested.

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A.S.

answers from Austin on

My husband went back to school at the age of 33 after ten years in the Army. He noticed the following things about being an older student:

-He was MUCH better equipped to deal with the self-motivation required for college.

-Professors really, really, really like to see returning students in their classrooms. They're motivated, are there because they want to be there and are much more likely to come to them for help. They're not so afraid to speak up in class and have a different perception on the world that serves them very well.

-Colleges, specifically community colleges, like having returning students among their population.

-Older students consistently had the highest grades. At community colleges, the valedictorian is almost always an older student.

Good luck! I'm going to be heading back to school in 2 1/2 years, when my son is in K full time. Then we'll all do homework in the afternoon. I'm already scared!

How exciting!

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D.B.

answers from San Antonio on

A.,
I just turned 47 and I returned back to college to become a chaplain two years ago. (I have at least 1 more year to get my basics before I either get my masters in divinity or go to seminary...haven't decided which route I want to go. but it does mean many more years of schooling.) I understand what you are going through. There are days I so love what I am doing and then there are others that I think "hello, idiot, what are you doing." But the way I see it??? I will hit 50 or so anyway and I can either do it by obtaining a career I want or I can hit 50 and always regret not stepping out and "going for it." My sons are 25, 24 and 21 so child rearing is not an issue for me like it is you. However, you are setting a GREAT example for your sons because you are showing them to go for their dreams, you are never too old to learn and most importantly, mom is a person and has dreams/desires. You can always write me personally if you like.
D.

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L.M.

answers from Sherman on

Yes I can relate to going back to school after many years. My reason was because my company closed the factory and relocated to Mexico. After 29 years of graduating high school I found mt self back in school. This time for retraining of a new career under the NAFTA laws. It was scary and very challenging. It was harder to learn and juggling family and studying was really a trial, but I made it through with a GPA of 3.69 and so can you. Just keep reminding yourself of why and what you are doing this for and God will see you through.

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L.A.

answers from Houston on

A.-

I returned to college a few years ago and, like you, was in my mid-40's. Luckily, there were other women who were doing the same thing and I bonded with them. It did take me almost one semester to re-train my brain to academics (I had been in corporate America for 20 years) but once I did - I was an A student. In fact, this second college venture was completely different than my first. This time, I was actually interested in learning - I sat on the front row, read the textbooks, asked the professor questions and even visited them in their offices. Most profs are great resources, too. I really enjoyed my year at college and hope to return soon to finish my master's degree. Good luck!

L.

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