Moving with a Three Year Old

Updated on January 13, 2009
P.M. asks from Montvale, NJ
9 answers

We live on a busy street, and decided to sell our house and buy a new one in a quiet area. So we sold our house, but have not found a new one yet. Because we have to move at the end of the month, we had to get an apartment. Anything I should do or do not do when moving to a much smaller place with a 3 year old? My son really likes our current home, and he has plenty of runing around room. Has anyone dealt with this type of transitional move, and is there anything I need to prepare for?

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So What Happened?

Thank you for your advice. I think this move is going to be harder on me than on my son. I actually think he may enjoy the small space for a while, and hopefully we'll find our dream home sooner than later. I am going to miss this house even though it is on a busy street. Our home has a great level of positive energy. We purchased this house right before we got engaged, so there are so many memoroes here. Since we purchased this house 7 years ago, I finished my Masters degree, we got engaged, we got married, we have out son, and there are just so many great memories. I can actually remember spending hours in my son's room when I was pregnant, I would just sit on the rocker and imagine the wonderful experiences to come. I just hope our next home has the same positive energy, and that we can have our next child soon after.

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N.D.

answers from New York on

Well you are moving and trying to toilet train your son, that will be very hard. I just replied to your other post about potty training and I would ease up on that because of the moving. Dont stop altogether, but either go back to the pull ups (which I dont like) or buy thick cloth training pants and dont scold if he any accidents. Just keep telling him to go at regular times. When he complains about the tiny apartment tell him it will only be for a little while and soon he will have a big back yard to play in and lots of new friends, maybe even a pet. Tell him he can pick out the color for his new room etc. Make it an exciting event. Kids are very resilient and will adjust to most anything if presented in a happy way. Of course you and your husband have to be very careful what you say around him. If you complain about the apartment or the stress of moving he will pick up on it.
Good luck, its a great time to buy a house.

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K.B.

answers from Albany on

Find a park close by & some special destinations that you & your son can look forward to going to. Mabe figure out a walking route that would be fun & safe. Bring as little as possible with you. Moving into a smaller space can be a challenge so if you box stuff up that is not really nessesary you'll be ahead of the game when you get to your new apt. It will also give your son more space to run around.

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W.T.

answers from New York on

The most important thing is your child's safety on moving day. Aside from the emotional chaos, there are people bustling around who don't know childproofing rules, there are interesting vehicles moving around, there are things usually out of reach that are now at eye level. Kudos to you for thinking long-term about settling in to the new place -- but please remember,and tell EVERYONE else, safety first on moving day!

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K.H.

answers from Utica on

HI
You will make it. Kids adjust to changes sometimes better than we do.
When our twins were 4, we moved out of state to see about a job opportunity. We rented our house as it did not sell. The girls were excited about the move because we always portrayed the idea that it was an adventure. It surely was. We moved into the house there, and within the year that job was bust, but another was offered but it meant another move.
We moved into the company house while we looked to buy a house. We bought a house, only to move back to our original house that we had rented because an job offer with his old firm came up and they wanted him back bad enough to put together a good package.
OK so from '94-'97, we lived in 5 houses if you count the original house twice which we do because the girls hardly remembered it. The girls survived, and each time it was harder to portray adventure, but each time there were new things that happened. Yours will survive too.
Since I am old enough to be your mom, talk to yours.
God bless you with wisdom and strength as you move.
God bless your family with His peace
K. SAHM married 38 years --- adult children 37 coach, 32 lawyer married with 4 mo., and twins 18 and in college after homeschooling.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Hi P.,
My kids were 5 and 1 when we sold our first house, and had a month before we closed on our current house, so we were in a small apartment temporarily. Since your son is used to more space and a yard, and you'll be stuck in an apartment for the winter, investigate indoor play places in the neighborhood, gym classes for preschoolers, if there is a Y check out their classes, parks for good weather days or snowman making, anything to give your son the opportunity to get out and get moving around if he won't have a yard to run in for awhile. Good luck!

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K.Z.

answers from New York on

We moved across the country with our then 13 month old into a temporary apartment, and lived in it for eight months before we were able to sell our old house and buy one in the area. All we did was make sure he had his favorite toys (basically everything we could easily fit into our two cars for the drive), his Pack 'n Play to sleep, his sheets and blankets, his lovey, and his mom and dad. We had a rough night or two when we got into the apartment, but otherwise he did great. Of course, my son was much younger than yours, but I think adults really get wrapped up in the process of moving. Kids are pretty adaptable.

I would recommend you give your son a small suitcase to pack his favorite toys into, and let him watch you pack his things away and tell him that he'll see them at the new apartment or new house. Keep him a part of everything that is happening so it isn't as scary.

Good luck!

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D.N.

answers from Albany on

My son Cooper was three when we moved from a smaller house into this larger one. He liked the new house, but would ask; "When can we move back to our old house again?" We'd explain to him that if we moved back to the old house, we'd have to get rid of a lot of our things because the old house is smaller. He'd respond, "Okay, we'll stay here then.... but I miss my old house." We told him we understood that and said that we missed it too, but we like our new house very much. Then he'd agree with us and move on to another subject or play. He did talk about the old house for about two years though. Three year old's do not like change. :D Good luck. D. N. xo

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M.B.

answers from Rochester on

P.,

Plan on leaving all your STUFF in boxes. Your clothes, kitchen utensils, furniture, and toys should be all that is out. If you can put the rest in storage, you will thank yourself later. You'll miss the pretty objects, (but you may also realize you don't need them :)

The bare minimum you need to survive: Stereo and music apparatus, a loveseat, maybe a stuffed chair, your food table and chairs, and that's it. (We don't have a TV accessible to baby, so I didn't suggest that.) I'm sure you need your computer at times, too, so maybe that would be something (but saving the $ from cable for a month or two might help your budget a bit in the end :)

CLEAN the apartment before you move in, especially well if there was a smoker there before you. Wipe down everything, doors, panels, cabinets, under the cabinets (the part where it overhangs the floor). All appliances and fixtures. Even wiping the walls. Start on one end of the apt and go to the other missing nothing. You will thank yourself for this step towards cleanliness.

Your baby is going to be stepping on this carpet barefoot and you don't want to worry about tacks or dirt or germs from other people. Don't use powders or other cleaning agents if you can help it on the carpet. Even wiping the windows will help with dust and other yucky stuff that you might not think about.

Good Luck,
M.

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J.K.

answers from New York on

Just focus on all the fun things that you can do, don't dwell on the place being smaller, not as much room to run, etc etc. Find things to do outside of the home or mom's groups that you can meet with and get some energy out that way so he isn't missing all the "run around" time at home. Build a fort in his room with a sheet and put some cars, toys and a flashlight in there and tell him he's camping out! Just be sure to always tell him the good and fun things that CAN be done, and be sure he doesn't hear you tell others that your temporary place isn't the greatest - or he will start feeling that way too. Kids are so resilient, and as long as you keep your current routine in the new place, he will learn to adapt to the walls! (from a military wife who has moved each year of my kids (5ys and 2.5 yr girls) lives...

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