Mom Seeking Help with Potty Training. - Germantown,OH

Get rid of the pull-ups. Put character underwear on him.
They don't like the feel of that going down their legs.
Plus if it is their favorite character underwear, they
don't want to mess them up. Let them pick out the under-
wear at the store and talk about what a big boy he is.
Good luck.

My daughter will be 3 tomorrow and has been in panties since last august. She will still go in a pull up if she has one on. the only way I got her to use the potty was to go to regular underwear. I would ditch the pull ups and see what happens, at least while you're at home.

Hi E.
my name is L., with my son i took him out of diapers and went straight to regular underware when he was two, he was trained in a week, he more or less trained himself, he did not like the feeling of being wet, and when they wear pull ups they can not feel it, too much like a regular diaper. so if you don't mind a few messes or accidents , trust me it should not take long, then get regular underwear, i also did the same thing with my two daughters. let me know if this helps. good luck
mom of three son 16, daughters 6 and 7

Hi E.,
get rid of the pull-ups. they feel to much like diapers, get regular underwear. they feel different than a diaper.
good luck!!

L.

There are many books on potty training in one day. I would do that one day and from then on he gets underwear. If he soils himself make him take part in cleaning it up and he needs to sit on the potty to make sure he doesn't need to pee anymore and to give him that association. Obviously, you need to take a hard approach as I am sure you have tried every nice way around it. You will likely not be able to go many places for about a week. But one week of your time is much better than continuing in diapers.

My son was 4 when I could potty train him. The #2 came a little later. Have you tried having your husband working with him. ALso if a boy sees his dad using the toilet he may want to do it since they are both boys. It worked with my boy. I have 3 boys and 1 girl and the boys were not interested in it as early as my boys. Boys are wired differently and each child is different so you need to determine what is right for him not what everyone else thinks is right. You know your child better than anyone else. You can do it.

Sometimes it takes a bit longer for boys.....has he shown any signs of being ready? Kids rarely follow our schedule for using the potty. My advice would be to use underwear during awake hours and pull ups only for sleeping. Kids are so smart and do know the difference. Also there are movies you can get for him to watch or books to read to him. Visuals can be very helpful!

I am the mother of 3 boys ages 15, 10, &2 and 1 girl age 3.5. My oldest boy was 4 before he wanted to use the potty. Good luck to you and try not to push it on the child....I think children have less accidents when they are allowed to potty train in their own time. Not a good idea to force it. Not a bad idea to have a potty movie playing in the background :-)

Stop stressing yourself and your son over the issue...I gave my children the option every morning of "big boy pants" or a diaper. If they chose "big boy pants" they wore them until they had an "accident". By doing this, they pretty much potty trained themselves and there was no stress for either of us. Something else you might want to try is setting him backwards on the toilet....no getting between the cracks that way and he will feel more secure about sitting there since he can't fall in.

E.,
I feel your pain! My son will be 4 in June, and we just got him totally potty trained about 5 months ago. This is not because he wasn't able to! He started using the potty on and off at 16 months! It was a HUGE source of stress for us, we tried bribery and positive reinforcement, and letting him run around naked for over a year to no avail. Then all of the sudden one day in desperation I asked him (for the millionth time) why he wouldn't use the potty, and he gave me his usual response; "I'm not bigger enough" So I asked him when he would be bigger enough, and he said "when i don't have any more diapers." So, I stopped buying pull-ups (he was wayyyy too big for diapers at this point so the expense was huge as you know) and when we ran out a few days later he had one accident and hasn't had one since, even at night.

My point isn't that you should just stop buying diapers, what I'm saying is that we let so much stress build up on what out kids should be able to do and when and it's not worth it! I've decided that there isn't anything you can do to make it click for them past teaching them the simple mechanics of how to use the potty. Your son will surprise you one day and decide that he's bigger enough all by himself. He will be fine, you will be fine, and your younger son will probably train earlier because he wants to be like his brother! My daughter is 19 months and is so upset she can't pee standing up like her brother : )

I don't know what all you have tried, but we saw a lot of improvement when we set the rule that he couldn't watch any TV unless he pooped in the potty. It didn't work 100% because sometimes he would just decide he didn't care but for the most part he loved Diego so much that he at least got a little better at noticing it was coming ahead of time rather than running to the bathroom as it was coming out! It also had the side benefit of cutting down on the TV time that I'd let get out of control with my second pregnancy+toddler exhaustion.

Another great tool was getting him around other little boys his age who were trained. Eventually he started to realize that he was different than all his friends and he didn't like that. That was actually about a week before the "bigger enough" conversation, so I'm convinced it was highly effective.

Good luck!
T.
Mommy to Gavin (3) and Madeline (1)

Hi E.
this will probably be of no help at all but i thought our oldest son would be going to kindergarten wearing pampers. At that time pull ups were not available.
Wonderful news, he did start using the potty chair before school started. Acturally he was probably around four.
I found out that it is not our time to say 'you need to use the potty chair' but as their bodies become more mature enough to act with their mind that tells them 'i am ready' then and not before will they not need the pull ups.
This is what our dr. Told us and that was 34 years ago. Maybe it is different now but i doubt it. Good luck K.

I've tried several methods. Every child is different, so it's a bit of trial and error.

I usually keep a pull-up at night and try underwear during the day. I make the little one go at least every hour and before sleeping. I cut off drinks two hours before getting for bed including foods that are mostly water like oranges.

A girlfriend had a tea party. They drank water, juice, milk, etc all day. I did the same with my little boy. He likes to play in the toy kitchens. We got out all the play plastic food. Pretended to eat and drank a lot. Since it's getting warmer, you could make ice slushies from frozen and mashed kool-aid or frozen juice. The more they drink the more they pee. During food/drink time, take them potty about every 20 minutes.

I have tried keeping the little one in underwear. Everytime they pee in their pants, I tell him he needs to tell me when he has to go. Most kids don't like being yucky and wet, so it's a discouraging thing to have pee running down your leg.

I have put several little training potties around the house. I have one in the living room and in bathrooms upstairs and downstairs. I have the little potty seat you put on top of the regular toilet. I've found that one son would only poop if he sat on the little potty seat on top of the toilet and pee in the child's toilet. My other one will only stand pee-ing at the regular toilet. (Since kids miss A LOT, I would suggest the stand and pee method. I kind of regret teaching that one since he's so young.)

I sing a little song after they go "pee pee on the potty, pee pee on the potty". They sing along and think it's fun. I give them rewards, hugs and kisses when they go and make a huge deal out of it. I reward with stickers. They get a sticker for pulling up their own underwear and pants, another sticker for pee-ing, and two stickers for pooping in the potty. They also get a sticker for just trying to go. I bought about a 1,000 assorted stickers for about $2.00 at Wal-Mart. They are brightly colored, all sizes, designs, etc. My friend has also used kids tattoos that you put on with water if the child goes consistently all week. My other girlfriend told her son they would have a "potty party" once he was potty trained. He was so excited about having a cake, friends, and presents he was trained in a week.

Hi E.! My son is 2 1/2 and I'm expecting our next child in about 3 weeks! I've been told that boys are harder to potty train, but not to use pull ups. My son will go on the potty if we have him on it when he has to go (we put him on it every time he gets up from sleeping and right before he goes down) but if he has to go any other time, most of the time he will not tell us until after he's done his buisness! But I have heard the best way to train them is to let them wear big boy underware so that when they go, they will feel it in there and not like the dirty/wet feeling. We've also been training him to stand to pee. For this, we put some cheerios in the potty and tell him to 'sink the cheerios'. This also helps if he watches daddy do it first so he knows what he's suppose to do! Good Luck!

I was blessed with three little ones in my mid 30's. and all three were in dipers. the oldest a boy was 4 and mid was a girl she was 3 and the baby was 3 months old. how I got the boy to use the potty was simply keeping on him and no pull ups to me they are just a way of not having to clean up after a child has had a mistake and as in your case just a big diper for the child. When iI piut him in big boy pants and told him as soon as he started to use them he could do "BIG" boy stuff. Plan a trip for just the two of you where if he stayed dry you'd have lots of fun but if he got wet you'd have to leave so you could take care of it. Soon he would relize its more fun to go potty in the potty than not. This also worked for the little girl

I didn't even try pull-ups with my son, just underwear. It's working out great! I still can't get him to poop in the potty and he does that more at night time when we diaper him. I think the pull-up would feel more like a diaper than anything. Also, you could try treats with him for going potty. My son always likes either suckers, stickers, or even lifesavers. We're still going through potty training and he still has the occasional accident but things are going well and we NEVER used pull-ups.

From my experience (with my 4 kids), Pull-Ups are just like diapers. They make it too easy for kids to just go in them and not try to go to the potty. When my kids started potty training, we phased out the diapers and Pull-Ups to just at bed time. Things really went quickly after that. My daughter still has accidents, but probably 95% of the time she goes in the potty. Just be sure you have enough extra pairs of underwear so you don't run out before they all get in the wash!

I have all girls, but I have seen this with boys. The best thing is to take away the pull ups. Then he will have to use the potty because he will not like the feel of soiled underwear.
D.

Ah the pull up saga! :) I would have to say try the underwear. They feel when they are wet with underwear that they don't feel with pull ups (even those feel wet pull ups absorb most of pee!) My sons school didn't allow pull ups so we didn't use them.
My son is not potty trained at night at 5 :( He wears a pull up and if I don't get it off as soon as he gets up, he will just go in the pull up out of laziness b/c he knows he can. He KNOWS he shouldn't--but why get up from watching his morning cartoons or eating if he can just go and not feel wet?
Making him go is a battle of wills...suggestion to try every two hours, before meals (and after meals for poooping!) right when he wakes up from bed or nap and right before he goes to bed. We tried the reward system and it did not work for us at all. He quickly figured out when he wanted peez he had to pee on the potty and that was the only reason he went to the potty. All his friends in his class were potty trained before my son, he was in a preschool class and was suppose to be completely potty trained. So we showed him his friends went pee on the potty so he could too! :) His grandpa's, uncles and dad all took him to the potty every time they went, and every time I had to go I suggested he go. We had accidents but it's bound to happen.
My son potty trained between 3 and half and four during the day so I would say you could easily give underware a try and if you want you could buy plastic pants to go over them. (Keep pee contained a little bit more than getting all over the carpet and furniture when there are accidents.)

E.,

I'm right there with you! My girl is 3 1/2 and we are just now seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

My husband and I made the mistake of not even trying to potty train before her younger brother was born. Devoting time to her so fully while I have to keep one eye on my 10 month old is almost impossible.

So we've been through it, too. We tried everything. Actually, I'll capitalize that. ... EVERYTHING. Rewards, praise, candy, stickers, pull-ups, timers, games, fun pottys, joint tinkles, we even promised her a puppy with the money we save on diapers! (she was not impressed) ... it's totally exhausting. And it's all a battle of wills. We had to make up our minds that we are stronger-willed than she is. It's not a question whether or not she feels like she has to go, it's time to try and that's that. And since we've kept at it, she's starting to notice when she has to pee without us telling her. We keep the pull-ups on and keep the kiddie potty here in the playroom. But whatever is best for you is what you should try. We tried the underwear (and even totally nude) but that seemed to make her more upset than the actual training.

But I gotta tell ya, the thing that's finally making a difference ... I give her one 30 minute TV show to watch for tinkling in her potty. One movie for pooping. And this is not the first time we've tried this ploy; about two months ago, we took away the tv priveleges and she didn't seem to care. It was almost a punnishment for me rather than a bargaining tool for her! But this second time around, we're seeing some progress. We bought her some new DVDs to hit it home. She hasn't been able to watch them all yet! And she knows why.

So good luck. Keep with it! We've been working on this for about 9 months now, so stand strong!

J.

Undortunately, you can't make him go. It seems to be a battle of wills. Daddy helped our son. We used pull-ups when we left the house, but underwear when at home. We very rarely had an accident out of the house. But, it seems that maybe they won't work for yours. Lots of time & patience was the key for us. The reward system that we used was to find the one thing that he really wanted. Every little boy is different. For us, it was gummy dinosaurs, referred to as "Daddy's candy". Good luck.

Please don't take this as a slam against you (because I absolutely don't mean it as such), but pull ups are the absolute worst product that I've seen on the market in a long time.

They work like underwear, they look like underwear, so I can't understand why we're surprised when our children think that it's okay to pee and poo in their real underwear. ;)

I'd lose the pull ups, and I do feel that you'll have a rough spot during the transition (because he's used to them), but things will get better in the long run.

For little boys, the best game is to take a handful of cheerios, throw them into the toilet and see if you can get him to aim for them.

Good luck! Sorry this is frustrating for you, but it will get better!

E.,

It is not unusual to have a 3.5 year old not using the potty yet, especially for poop. He may be physically ready, but not emotionally ready. If you let him lead the way, he will do it in his own time and you will have less stress about it. (I have to keep telling myself this as my daughter does the same thing. She asks for a diaper every time she goes poop.)

Sorry, gotta run now, no time to finish.

Well, we are in the middle of the same thing with our newly 3yr old daughter. She is stubborn so we had to let things ride for about 8 weeks. We actually went back to baby diapers and she didn't appreciate the inconvenience. I also bought an ice cream cake from DQ and everyday I showed it to her and told her we would have it as soon as she earned enough stickers on her potty chart. That cake has worked like a charm! We are down to 1 piece and I tempted to buy another!! We also let her pick out her own undies and then she sits on a piddle pad when on the furniture. She doesn't like the crunchy feel of the paper so she makes sure she hustles to the potty so she won't have to sit on it anymore.

When my son was 3 years and 2 months, summer was starting. It seemed easier to start potty training in the summer versus the winter. We talked it up constantly. We got one of those little rings that sit on top of the toilet seat to make the opening smaller. We let him flush the toilet a few times to show him what happens to the water. And my husband took him in to show him how to do it. The first few days, we would let him go without any pants at all for a couple of hours. And when he had to go, we would take him in and sit him on the potty. We never used pull ups. We had one pack of them that we tried to use at night, but at that age, he was pretty dry every morning and switched him to underwear at night pretty quickly. So we didn't even use all the pack.

You have to commit to potty training. It will take a few days. Try to not go a lot of places for those days so that the accidents aren't a huge issue.

Hi E.. My son was pretty slow at learning to use the potty. He got his favorite underwear for his 3rd birthday and started trying, but it seemed to be forever before he really got it. I personally, do not believe in pull ups. Even though underwear are very inconvenient when you are out and he has an "accident". It really is your own personal preference, but I like the underwear because they see and feel the consequences of their not using the potty. Especiallywith summer coming up, I would do the underwear through then and hopefully you'll see results. Also, you didn't mention if you were married, but Daddy could show him how he goes and bring him to the bathroom.
Good luck with it!

my daughter is 3 1/2. she would go to the potty at school fine, but not at home. over spring break when my husband and i were both home for a few days, we told her no more pull ups (we did talk about it in advance that it was coming up) we put her in big girl panties. we had about 4 days of cleaning up pee/poop accidents but then she was fine. we did a "potty chart" with stickers and once she realized she didnt like going to the potty all over herself she really got into it and now she pees and poops on the potty. it was a LOT of work for me and my husband for those 4 days but totally worth it now. she wears pull ups for naps and at night time still, but i'll take that. i know that will take a while yet. good luck.

My son was very slow at potty training also. I tried the little rewards like candy, but he didn't love candy enough. I made him sit on the potty at certain times each day, and put regular panties on him during the day, but he would still have accidents, and I gave up & gave him the pull-ups back. What worked for me was a true bribe. I asked him what he wanted. And I told him I would get it for him if he would start using big boy panties & going potty. And it worked! And at that age, they don't ask for much - he wanted a Mickey Mouse shirt. I got him one with his name monogramed on it!

Hi there! We're still going through problems with potty training our son as well. He's 3 1/2 years old and this is what has worked and is currently working for us...

The doctor suggested to just focus on peeing as step one. So, we gave him big boy underwear and told him that he has to pee in the toilet (my husband showed him standing up). BUT the key thing that worked for us was that when he had to go poopy - he could let us know and he can have a pull-up on just for that reason (he wears one during naps/nighttime still). So, with him being comfortable with that - he's been doing really GREAT peeing in the potty!!! Now, the problem is pooping in the toilet, but he has mentioned to us that he's afraid to - not sure if he's afraid because of 'falling in and getting flushed down' or because sometimes he'll wait to poop and it'll be kind of hard (he has mentioned both at separate times). But, for now we're just extremely happy that he's wearing big boy underwear and peeing in the toilet!!! Hopefully, he'll want to just start pooping in the toilet soon... but we've tried EVERYTHING to get him just to pee and/or poop - so, I hope that helps a little and GOOD LUCK!!!! :)