Live in a Townhome; Problems with Neighbor Child

Okay, first off if you can secure things like bikes and scooters with chain locks then do it. If you have a bin, get the type of bin that has a lock and is big enough to fit all of your toys. Don't put the things out there as temptation.

When he's in your area, playing with or around your children, you have every right to ask him not to cuss or to go home if he can't refrain from cussing. If you catch him trying to steal again then you let him know that taking things without permission is called stealing, and if he wants to play with any of your toys he must ask first. Let him also know that there will be times that you say "no" and that he is never allowed to play with the toys when you and your children are not around.

If you still catch him trying to take something, then gently confront him and walk him home and you tell his parents what's going on and that you're concerned that he's going to get hurt while playing with your kid's things without supervision. Let them know that you caught him trying to remove toys from your property without permission. My point here is NOT to use inflammatory language because even though he's dropping the F-bomb and he's trying to play with toys that don't belong to him, he's still just a very little boy. And this is more of a parenting issue with his parents than with the boy.

If it is a common yard do you put your toys away when you are not out? There is no reason for private play things to be left in a commons area. I also live in a townhouse, and when we are not outside all our toys are in the garage and out of reach of the other kids running around. As for what happened with the 4 year old, that is for that kids mother to handle, I am assuming she was outside since the child is only 4.

If the parents are literally not available then you should report this to Child Protective Services. Please knock on their door and try to get to know them. Don't prejudge them. Consider the possibility of some extenuating circumstances such a an invalid mother and absent father. Just as an extreme example.

If a parent answers the door start out with a friendly gesture. Save complaints about their child for later, after you get to know them better. You could say you see their son outside all the time and like to get to know the parents of children who are around. Introduce yourself and describe your family. Invite them over for coffee. Take a plate of cookies. ETC. It's important to know who the parent's are if you want to do something about the out of control boy.

Your responsibility is to go straight to his parent/s and let them know what is going on. Let it be clearly known that he is not allowed in your yard, and if you find him there, you will begin reporting it as an unsupervised young child to the police.

Does that seem harsh? If so, here's a brief picture of my neighborhood.

The people across the street have lots of young children and several mothers living in the house. One day, the five year old climbed a ladder onto the roof and fell off. No parent around. One day, the two year old was climbing the ladder into the pool until I yelled. No parent. One day, the baby (probably just learned to walk) was literally in the middle of the street in nothing but a diaper in 40 degree weather. After collecting the child and returning her, all I could hear was a mother yelling at a five year old for not "watching" his sister. I've called the police several times.

The little boy in the other half of our duplex puts sand in my daughters hair frequently, swings sticks around, punches the other boys (not my daughter, but still), and has pulled his pants down to pee outside. My husband no longer allows him to play with our daughter, but we share a yard. So he stays on his side, we stay on ours, and all the neighborhood children (from our side of the street...not across the street) play in our side of the yard. I feel bad for the little boy, because really he can be quite sweet and I've seen him crying over being left out now, but we have talked to his mother and she could really care less. More of a "boys will be boys" attitude that I can't stand. Overall, I am really stressed about this situation right now.

So I think you have to be severe, even if it sucks.