Is There Help for Divorced Housewives?

Updated on January 25, 2007
F.G. asks from Houston, TX
16 answers

I've been married a little over two years, and now my husband and I are calling it quits. However, I was a housewife, and have nothing of my own. We all know what being a housewife is. So now I have nowhere to stay, no job (therefore no money), and he get's to keep our son because I don't have anything stable. So are there any organizations, job assistance programs, advice that can help me get my life together?

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So What Happened?

I have read everyone's responses, and thank God for them. There was a little misunderstanding about my son. He's just going to stay with his dad until I get myself on my feet. Right now my husband and I have been cooperating with eachother. And this coming week I will be speaking with a lawyer, I have a couple of job interviews, and I have decided to go back to school. I am excited and looking forward to moving on. I know it's not going to be easy, but I also know the prayers of the righteous avail much. So thank you all for your advice, and prayers, and I'm open to more!

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answers from Alexandria on

If I were you and if I liked the elderly, I would go to the nearest hospitals and talk to the social worker there and put my name on the hospital list as a sitter. People will usually ask them if they know any good sitters. That is how I found my sitters for my mother. You choose which shift you can work or the people will tell you when you are needed. Sometimes they will need you to sit at the hospital and sometimes in the home.

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answers from Houston on


There are lots of government and charity assistance programs. Start with your church and go see the state welfare office. Thats what we pay taxes for, you are in need, time to get some of your taxes back. The state welfare office should have information about job programs and other assistance of that kind.

If you are interested in Schooling like college, I suggest you go apply for grants and financial aide at the local community college. I lived on Federal grants and free financial aide for almost 2 years, it was money I didn't have to pay back and it was college too! It wasn't glamourous but it was a great start toward a new happy and comfortable life. Colleges are also a great place to find cheap roomates and lots of part time work is usually posted on the boards around the schools.

Good luck.

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answers from New Orleans on

My mother went through very much the same situation; she had been a housewife for almost 30 years when my dad and she split and he was hell bent on not giving her a penny. My brother, at the time, was about 6 and she was so scared she would have to give him up until she could get her life straight. The truth of the matter is that you have rights...rights to keep your son, rights to get child support from your ex, rights to food stamps, medicaid, welfare, etc etc... as far as you finding a job start with something small since you probably don't have time to wait weeks or maybe months to go through corporate job search hell. Apply at restarants, department stores, banks (tellers get paid well and you get evenings, weekends, and holidays off garanteed!). My mom started off making $7 an hour as a cashier at a grocery store and then went up to $8 as a bank teller and has since moved on to a lovely cushy office job making $13 an takes time but you can do it! And you're still young so it's a lot easier for employers to understand why you have little to no experiance. (when you're starting the work world in your 40's people tend to look at you funny).
You can also look into a temp agency...I'm not sure where you live but in the New Orleans area there are some really great ones like Brooke, Adecco, and Kelly Services; go through or the yellow pages to find them.
F., I wish you all the best of luck and if you need any advice from someone who has been through the dirt poor, searching for work, single mom hell too feel free to drop me a line.
Take care and keep faith

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Houston on

If you are near Lufkin there is a place called the Mosaic center. They may be able to help.



answers from Longview on


Is ther anyway you can make it work??? Lord I was a housewife for ten years and we called it quits with three children all under the age of 7 at the time. I kept the kids though. There is Temp service that wil find you an 8-5 job with out any problem. Anyone can anser the phone or stock some shelves. i prefer to be in an office. check out Kelly services and Express Personwell. Express ###-###-#### they can tell you one near you. Talk to Jeannie. Hope this helps. I was a single mom of three for six years and three kids. I did it . YOU CAN DO IT TOO!!! I have faith in you and so does our Lord! He will be right there with you. Do you pray? He likes to hear from us ya know.....



answers from New Orleans on

I don't know where you are getting your information from, but you are wrong. First, talk to a lawyer. Find out your rights, and don't do anything without the attorney's advice. Dawn is right. But I question any mother who would so easily give up custody of her son without a fight. Does your husband have anything stable??? What does he plan to do for childcare? I know in Louisiana, courts do not force a stay-at-home mom to go back to work due to divorce when children are under 5 years of age. learn your rights, and then exercise them. Also, paying for a lawyer should come out of your marital assets, so don't worry about the expense of legal assistance. Just get help.



answers from Sherman on

Dear F.,

Hang in there girl! I know it is rough. I have been divorced for 4yrs now. My son is now 7 but he was 2 1/2 when we separated. My situation is different than yours. I got everything and he got nothing. But I know how it is having defined oneself as a "housewife". You don't know how to be anything but that. I would suggest maybe a temp service to help you get started working, or even the unemployment office could help you find something. The only advice I can give is to keep praying for God's guidance. I know it's hard but I will keep you in my prayers too.




answers from New Orleans on

I'm sorry for all your going through right now. I'll keep you in my prayers. Stay strong in Him! Psalm 91



answers from Houston on

Hi F.,

There's hope don't give continue to pray and keep the faith, because there is hope and many opportunities out there. if you live in the south West houston area there a place that helps you with alot i things like jobs seeking, training etc.
the name of the place called nu work team located on bellair call 211 in tell them what sources you are looking for they would help ypu find many helpfull sources.

I wish you many blessing and I hope I help



answers from Houston on

Start with the Texas Workforce Commission - that's the unemployment office. Then start hitting temporary agencies. You can easily find them by going to and typing in temporary agency and the city and state. It'll give you listings, addresses, phone numbers, and a map to them all. Temp agencies are the best because they'll train you for free. You can also find all kinds of newspapers online for free, like the Houston Chronicle. If things are taking too long, go to somewhere like McDonald's and work there until you can find something more stable and permanent. There are housecleaning services that need help all the time, and being a housewife we have LOTS of experience in that! Same with waitressing, as I see it. Keep your hopes up and your eyes open. God will provide but sometimes we have to find it.



answers from Baton Rouge on

Why do you have to give up your son? THAT'S BS!!! Staying at home with your son was most likely both yours and your husbands choice...right? Do you have an attorney? You should be able to keep your son, get child support and spousal support until you can find a job. He can't just throw you out on the street... everything that was obtained during the marriage whether it was bought with money from his paycheck or not... is BOTH OF YOURS! GET AN ATTORNEY!!! If you cannot afford one... contact the state and find out what resources are available to you!!!



answers from Victoria on

F.; I've been there! Who says that just because you have been a stay-at-home mom, that he gets custody of your son? First off - unless there is a temporary order on file in your divorce, specifically giving him custody, you have equal right to possession of your son.... DO NOT GIVE UP SO EASILY! Legal Aid will help you with the divorce and custody. Go to a local women's shelther and get your life back on track. Register with the local Workforce center... if you have no experience or skills, they will train you! Speak to your pastor, and if you don't have one, find one! If at all possible, move in with a family member who is willing to help you and your son on a temporary basis! I'm always available to talk with and share my experience, strenght and hope with other mothers who are going thru this type of thing!



answers from Fort Smith on

First question I have is do you have any family or friends that will take you in for a while? Also, are you a member of a church? If not then I suggest calling one near you and speak to the pastor for direction. Even if you aren't a believer call around because a good church will help you get on your feet. Legal advice for you is a must. You have rights!!! There is a place called Legal Aid the number is in the phone book, should be downtown Fort Smith. You have rights to your son, child support and don't give in!!! Remember not to get down on yourself, you are still very young and life is full of possibilites for you. Everyday look in a mirror and smile at yourself and say "I'm smart, I'm strong, I'm worth the effort and will work hard to keep my son and get back on my feet!!!

I too was a young divorced mother with a newborn 21 years ago. I was blessed to have a mother that took us in for awhile. I applied for state help (HUD and food stamps and a Pell Grant) so that my son and I could live by ourselves. I did use my Pell Grant to go to college. However, being a single mom and holding down a part time job in a video store took a toll on me. I quit college and have regretted it ever since. I worked several odd jobs until a good one came along. Hang in there....there's hope.



answers from Fayetteville on

I have been divorced for more than five years now. When I first left my husband I had nothing but that was not a determining factor for custody issues. He was ordered to pay 25% of his income for child support and is responsible for transportation for his bi-weekly weekend visits. If you do not have a place to live on your own right now I suggest you find family or friends who may be able to help you until you get on your feet. if you are broke there is always government assistance programs to help single moms. call social services. get a hold of a pastor at church for some direction. what ever you do i would advise against getting involved in a relationship with anyone new for a while until you sort everything out. It's easy to fall into a new guy for the stability but you're not ready. Be strong, you will make it.

L. teresh



answers from Sherman on

I was a housewife for 8 years when my ex and I decided to call it quits. I have three children. Fortunately, I do get supplement disability for my daughter which helps me a little financially. I decided to enroll in college. I applied for every grant and scholarship I could. The government is paying for my college. It is never too late to go back to school to better yourself. I am sure that there is a local workforce commission in your town. Go there and see what you can find for income in the meantime.



answers from Houston on

Many temporary employment agencies (like Kelly Services) offer free computer training and place you in jobs that pay fairly well.

Also, the unemployment office also offers some training and is a great place to start looking for a job. I think they also have a college-type program, but I don't remember for sure.

Best of luck, and I hope things start looking up for ya!!!!!

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