Hunger or Habit??

Updated on April 01, 2009
M.K. asks from Lake Orion, MI
10 answers

Hi Moms -

I have a 9 month old daughter who is nursing and taking solids. She still wakes b/t 4-5am for a feeding, but then promptly returns to sleep. A few days ago, we put her pacifier in and she went back to sleep with no feeding until 8am. So, I was going with it, trying to see if she was naturally weaning from the early morning feeding. However, the last few mornings have been harder. She isn't crying, but fussing on and off for an hour and a half. So, my question is...how do you know if the feed is habit or hunger? I'd hate not to feed her if she is hungry, but I kind of feel like it is more habit.

My son stopped the early morning feed on his own at 6 months, so I have nothing else to compare this to! I know every baby is different and everyone thinks the night feedings should stop at different times, but I was looking for the different opinions out there!

Any feedback would be great!

Thanks!!

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So What Happened?

Thanks for your help and input everyone! I realized that it doesn't have to be an "all or nothing" scenario. I have decided to try the pacifier first (actually my husband does, in all fairness to my daughter) and if that doesn't work, then I just go in and feed her. In another month or so, I'll revisit and see where we are at! It is much easier to feed her, so I don't mind that. Everyone gets back to sleep much quicker! Thanks again...

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A.H.

answers from Detroit on

After 8 months they don't "need" the early morning feeding. My daughter was a really easy 10 minute deal so I didn't stop going to her and eventually by 10 months or so she stopped waking all on her own.

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K.G.

answers from Detroit on

All 3 of my nurslings woke at some point during the night to nurse until they weaned at 19 mos, 19 mos, and 15 mos. It was alot easier to nurse them for 10 min and go back to sleep that to not nurse and they get upset and are awake for an hour or more. Even if he is not waking for hunger he still needs you emotionally.
Here is a link to an artical about night time nursing that I found helpful. http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepthrough.html
Blessings, K.

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C.M.

answers from Detroit on

My daughter was still nursing in the middle of the night until 10 or 11 months. Some nights she would go back to sleep with just the pacifier and other nights she needed to nurse. She did this on and off for a couple of weeks. I am a big advocate of letting them self wean the feedings unless there is some circumstance that is interfearing. If she is upset about it and is actually nursing, not using you for a pacifier, then I say let her nurse. You know what it is like when they use you as a pacifier, it is a completely different feel than when they are nursing to eat.

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C.S.

answers from Kalamazoo on

Hi M., my son is also 9 months and still wakes up for a 4-5am feeding too and goes right back to sleep. He just had his 9 month check up and I asked his doctor about it and she said it would be ok to let him cry out for a few days and see if he would sleep through it. I decided to just let him keep at it since it doesn't really bother me (he's usually only up for 10-15 minutes and then sleeps until 7 or 8). Not only that but he is actually eating and not just nursing himself back to sleep. His doctor also said that her daughter was the same way at this age and that at about 10 months she started weaning herself from that feeding and sleeping through. I've decided to give him another month or so and if he doesn't give it up on his own I will try weaning him myself. Just thought I'd let you know our situation, hope it helps! Good luck!

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F.W.

answers from Detroit on

I understand your dilemma. I can tell you that when they do start to 1) wean themselves and 2) sleep through the night, it doesn't start out as every night. They do it one night, then maybe 2-3 nights a week, and then eventually it becomes an everyday thing. Patience with trying it is the only way. If you are going to let her self wean, I suggest that if she wakes up and wants to nurse let her, but you could try just holding her to see if she will fall back asleep. Then you'll know if it is comfort or hunger. My guess is that within a few eeks you will be actually sleeping through an entire night again!

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L.O.

answers from Detroit on

I am sure her tummy is empty by 4 am.

My daughter stopped waking in the middle of the night at 7 months..

My son who is bigger and heavier still wakes up at 4 am to nurse many nights.. he is almost 2 year old..

I can let him nurse for 6 minutes and we all go back to sleep until 8 am..

some nights he does sleep through without an early morning nursing.

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G.B.

answers from Detroit on

Sounds hungry to me. I think you're very blessed that she sleeps as long as she does. Babies are so sweet in the morning!

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M.W.

answers from Kalamazoo on

If she needs the calories, she'll get them later on in the day. Don't worry about it an enjoy getting more sleep. If you notice weight loss try getting her to eat more in the daytime.

Best wishes!

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C.M.

answers from Detroit on

Hi M., You are right, every baby is different. I (through 3 babies, long ago) kept with the baby led weaning. Who says it has to be the same every day? If she is happy nursing, I would go with it. If she will take the pacifier, go with that. She is still so little and probably just wants her mom and the comfort she finds in you. She could actually be a bit hungry and in need of a snack. Pretty soon she will be pushing you away...savor every minute! Hooray for you that you are still nursing! You are doing the best thing for yourself and your little sweetie.

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R.H.

answers from Detroit on

Hi M.,

For me when I felt like my daughter was waking more out of habit I really started trying to pay attention to how she was eating, what it felt like etc.... I know you have to wake yourself up a bit more then you would like ... but, that's what I did. When I really felt like she wasn't really taking milk to EAT, but rather for comfort then I stopped offering the milk.

She would still wake for awhile, ask for milk (she knows the sign for milk), I would gently say "it isn't time for milk", and then rock her. While we were getting rid of that night feeding, I gave her some sort of comfort. I just felt it would be too cruel to take it all away when it was comfort she was seeking.

9 month time frame through about 11 or 12 can be tough. Seperation Anxiety can start and they can wake just to know mom and dad are there, growth spurts can wake them, new emerging skills can wake them ... it can be a real time of transition.

I'm not a cry it out mom at 9 months of age. I just don't feel they are ready to handle it. I feel before 13 or 14 months old they need that reassurance and comfort. I know not everyone will agree with me, and that's fine. Everyone has to make the decision they believe is best for their family.

So, this was my experience. I'm sure you will find the right solution for your little one.

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