Help with Transitioning from Crib to "Big Girl Bed"

Updated on January 09, 2010
B.W. asks from Merrimack, NH
10 answers

Hey Mamas, I looked through previous posts to get info, but couldn't find what I was looking for. I hope you can help me (you certainly have before!!). My girlie was 2 1/2 yrs early December. We have been talking about getting a big girl bed for a few weeks now, and she has seemed excited about it. We got it and set it up yesterday while she was at Grandma's. When she came home and saw it, she was happy and playing in it, but seemed a little stressed by it. We decided not to push it, and put her in the crib for the night. She went down and woke up fine. This afternoon I tried again to put her in the bed for a nap, telling her she needed to stay in bed till momma got her. Well, nothing i was doing was working. I really have no idea how to go about this transition. What has worked for all of you? What ages did your little ones graduate to the toddler bed? A little background: she is extremely vocal, smart and independant. She has an immense vocabulary, and so understands everything we tell her. We are also potty-training right now. Again, not really pushing it, but is this too much to do all at once? I just want to do right by her. I know all kids are different, but this being our first, we have nothing to go by. Also, what age did your kids give up the nap? She has been slowly trying to give it up. I'll get one every other day or so. I'm pretty sure once we get her into the bed, naps will be a thing of the past =( Thanks in advance for your insights. I appreciate you guys!!!

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So What Happened?

Hey ladies, thanks so much for all your insights!! Mamasource was acting funny when i first started getting responses, so I wasn't able to read any the first night. We just went ahead and put her in the bed after our normal routine. She got up a few times, but was asleep within 20 min. The next day at nap was even better. When I was finally able to read all your info, she was already going strong. It was really nice to see that my instincts were legit though, because it was actually Daddy who was pushing the big girl bed. I was happy to let her stay in the crib, which was echoed by you all. (if anything, it gave me a few more minutes of sleep in the am!!) I'm happy to say though, she is doing great, and is excited to run to her bed and get in every night now. I guess it just taught me to trust his instincts as well. She will get up and play a little, but she likes being able to get in herself, and knows she must stay in her room. Thank you all very much for your support!! <3 <3 B.

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K.A.

answers from Boston on

My son was resistant too when we started talking about it. There's a book with Elmo and his big boy bed and that made all the difference. My sister also lent us some Elmo and Thomas the Tank Engine sheets which helped.

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K.E.

answers from Boston on

I just gave up naps for my almost-4-year-old a few weeks ago, and my 2-year-old still sleeps for several hours each day. My older son would still nap if I let him (and sometimes asks for naps), but the problem is that he won't go to sleep until 9:30 or 10:00 if he naps. I do still enforce a "quiet time" of at least one hour when he has to do something low key such as coloring, reading, or watching a DVD. Something that doesn't involve racing around the house with his trucks. I've found that the quiet time is really important for both of us to make it through to the end of the day.

My 2-year-old is still in a crib mostly because of space constraints, but we did move my older son into a toddler bed when he was about 2. However, we kept him in a crib or Pack 'n Play for naps right until he stopped taking naps! There is no way he would have stayed in bed and rested if he could have climbed out at 2 years old. I think he could have slept in a bed for naps at 3, but he liked sleeping in the Pack n' Play because it was routine.

Every kid is different, so this might or might not be helpful, but good luck figuring things out!

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J.P.

answers from Boston on

You're right, all kids are different. Our daughter used her crib until she was over 3. We had no reason (new baby, climbing out) to put her in a regular bed. Some of her peers were in beds earlier for a variety of reasons.
My daughter also still naps when she's not in school and she's 4 1/2. We now keep her naps brief so bedtimes aren't a nightmare, but it takes the edge off and makes afternoons easier on all. Again, many of her peers gave up naps long ago. Whatever works...
Good luck,
J.

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L.B.

answers from Boston on

Brigid,

My daughter was born 2 days before yours! Yes, we were thinking of switching her over to a big bed because she gets her legs caught in the bars of the crib and she's getting too big for it. But I also know that if she's in a big girl bed she will NOT nap - and she naps at least 4-5 times a week. She is not potty training - we started that when she turned 2 and she was very interested, and then was not interested, and she's coming back to it, but very slowly.

I've heard you should not transition to a big bed while potty training - that they can only master 1 big change at a time. So for now, we are going to wait until she is closer to giving up her naps before we move her to a bed, otherwise, she'll never get to sleep.
Good luck and let me know how it works out!!
L.

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K.Q.

answers from Boston on

Don't push the big girl bed unless you are ready to 'retrain' her to sleep in a new place. We moved my son out of his crib at 2 because he had a little sister coming and we needed the crib. And it was HARD! He found it very exciting, because he could get up and play when he pleased. We made sure his room was very safe (no cords, choking hazards, etc.) and put a gate on his door so that he wouldn't wander the hallways. And make sure you are always listening on a monitor!

You can also try putting the bed next to her crib, or put the mattress on the floor, and she can start taking naps there.

If she still fits and sleeps well in her crib, don't feel like she has to rush out of it because a friend or grandparent says it is time. Only you know if she is ready for the big transition or it is too much. I know plenty of parents who had their kids in cribs until 31/2 or even 4!

J.T.

answers from Portland on

I would continue to use the crib until she chooses to sleep in the big bed. It might take her a few weeks or longer before she feels comfortable with the idea. Let her get used to it by playing - maybe help put toys and dolls to sleep or use it to snuggle up and read.

Both my kids napped until age 5. It's so good for them, and it give you a much needed break too. Even if she only naps a few days a week, keep up the routine so she has the down time. It IS tricky once they are in a real bed as they tend to figure out pretty quick they can get up and play (or wonder the house at 2 am).

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R.K.

answers from Boston on

If she is sleeping good in her crib and doesn't try to climb out then there is absolutely no reason to move her to a bed. Why mess with a toddler that sleeps well. If she is potty trained at night chances are she will need your help to go anyway so that isn't a reason at this age to change to a bed. I know I have to help our little guy potty at night. I would say keep the bed up but don't push it let her sleep in the crib as long as she wants.

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A.T.

answers from Hartford on

Hi,
I think that it all depends on your needs. We moved my son at 34 months-2 months before our twins were born. We actually taught him how to climb in and out of his crib safely at around your daughters age but he had no real desire to. We did it more for safety. By almost 3 he adjusted without a single hitch and he was part of the bed selection process as well as picking out bedding. I guess if there is no need to get her out of the crib (like a ew sibling) then there is no harm in her sleeping wherever she feels safest.

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J.S.

answers from Boston on

I agree that it's too much to be potty training and transitioning, and also it's not clear there's any need to move her out of the crib. My little one is two months younger than yours (Aug 07) and I intend to keep her in the crib as long as absolutely possible. She climbed out once over the summer and we explained to her that instead of climbing out she should call for Mommy or Daddy as it's dangerous and she really took it to heart. We also have a video monitor so we can watch when she's in there and make sure she's safe.

I also to keep her napping as long as possible. They need the rest.

good luck.

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B.V.

answers from Boston on

Hi B.,
WHy do you want her in a 'big girl' bed? If there isn't a compelling reason, why not have the bed and the crib available and let her choose. It may take awhile for her to choose the bed or to choose it consistently but if there is not another reason, let her take her time.
God Luck,
B.

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