Girl Almost 6 and Son 4.5 - Austin,TX

Is your daughter in therapies? How do her therapists respond to her tantrums? What do they recommend? They must have experience dealing with this sort of thing on a regular basis. If she's not in therapy, it sounds like she needs it ASAP. Without knowing her delays, it's hard to recommend potty training strategies. Is your daughter verbal? Could it be that she's throwing the tantrums because she is unable to communicate effectively? Two year olds often throw tantrums because they can't speak well enough or make their feelings/needs clear enough to other people. If your daughter doesn't communicate like her same-age peers, perhaps the tantrums are the result of her inability to express her wants and needs.

Work with her doctors and therapists closely. Whatever they recommend for her may work for your son too. Is he also delayed? Why do you think he has such violent tantrums?

I'm sorry but we need more information here. What kinds of therapy are your kids getting? What kind of therapy/help are you getting? I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but posting a question on a message board is not going to solve all your problems. I wish you all the best and hope you find the answers you are seeking.

I sure can related to what you are going through, to some extent. While I do not have the potty training challenges, we are dealing with a child who is suffering from neurological differences. He is 8.5 and cannot deal with change. He is anxious, can't focus and is extremely stubborn and controlling. He makes living life not very fun for anyone in the family. I hate to say this about my son who I love so much; I know there are some out there who will read this and will be appalled. The bottom line is, they just don't get it. Raising kids like ours is different than raising a more typical child. I know this because I have a typical child too. She is a breeze to raise and discipline. However, she does pick up some bad habits from big brother sometimes. My advice is to start following Kirk Martin (Celebrate Calm). Great disciple advice for the not so typical kid. Spend as much quality time with her as possible. This is probably the most helpful thing in our household. Put it on your phone calendar, if you have to. 15 min after school, or more!! Nothing is more important than that. If her emotional needs are met, she's less likely to tantrum. Lastly, we are now seeing a psychologist. He does a lot better the 2 or 3 days following. I need to join a support group, as my stomach is in knots all of the time. Maybe you can find one in your area. Good luck. I hope life improves for us and our little ones! P.s. I bribed my son to potty train. He picked out a toy he wanted badly! I bought it for him after 1 week of success! It worked. Not sure of your daughters challenges but thought I would throw that out there.

I taught children with developmental issues and in the ARD meetings we would offer IN-HOME TRAINING. This is someone who will come to your home and help you deal with the issues that you are describing such as dressing and potty training. This is available free through your school district. Call your special ed. department and ask.