Getting Anxious About My Son's Surgery

Updated on June 16, 2011
S.B. asks from Chicago, IL
12 answers

My son is 19 months old, and since he's been about 5 weeks old he's had this bump on his outer left eyebrow. The pediatrician had ordered an xray to be sure it wasn't involved in his bone structure, and it wasn't, so her best opinion was that it was a cavernous hemangioma (benign vascular cyst) and we'd watch it, because it would likely go away on its own. In the meantime, we also saw a dermatologist, who was clueless and a waste of time, because all he said was "I don't know..." Okay, so fast forward to now, we got an ultrasound after his 18 month well baby appointment and the radiologist recommended we consult with a surgeon for biopsy and removal of the cyst. The radiologist was not of the opinion that the cyst was vascular, since the ultrasound did not show any evidence of blood flow. Also, he said that the bone under the cyst was growing abnormally because of the cyst getting in the way. So, last week we saw a plastic surgeon (since it's on his face) and they have scheduled the surgery for July 8. Up until now I have gone with the flow, and since I have a medical background, I haven't been nervous about anything. The surgeon is 95% sure it's a dermoid cyst, but since the bone is growing abnormally he is going against his original opinion that this is non-urgent and can wait until my son is older. I want the cyst to be gone so that we will once and for all have an answer as to what it is and so that my son doesn't become deformed. But now I am getting anxious because he will be going under general anesthesia. I will be talking to the nurse again before the surgery, but I guess I'm just needing a virtual hug here. Have any of you gone through a procedure like this with such a young child? Any words of advice for getting through the event and for the recovery period? Thanks so much.

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D.N.

answers from Chicago on

I have not had this exact thing but a friend's nephew did. He had surgery at 9 months because the cyst on his brow was growing and affecting the bones. He is now 12 and totally fine.
My son had a port put in for medication he needs when he was 13 months. It does not matter how calm you are about the procedure or how much you know that your child will be fine. Once that day comes, you become a nervous, panicky MOM. They told me he would be in there about an hour but it took 2 1/2. At one hour, I started pacing. They had a little problem threading the line up to the vein in his throat so it took longer. When he woke up, he was totally out of sorts and screaming since he did not know why or what was happening.
Oh, I wanted to add for after. When he wakes up, he may not recognize you since he will be out of sorts. But remember, you are mommy and you will be able to calm him down and he will remember.
When my daughter had her tonsils/adenoids out at 4, there was a little boy maybe a year old. When he woke up he was screaming and crying, just like my son did. The parents totally panicked and swore they hurt him. The nurses tried to talk to them but they would not listen and tried to leave with him, still with an IV. The poor thing was scared even more. Just be calm and as he wakes up and recognizes things, it will calm down. I just want to say it is a totally normal reaction.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

My daughter had general anesthesia, for her hernia surgery.
It was fine!
They have Pediatric Anesthesiologists... the "Team" will tell you how and what they do. You ask questions. It is routine.
You also talk to the Surgeon. They will explain it to you.

My daughter was 8 when she had her surgery.
She was fine!
She recovered fine!
No trauma at all.

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L.P.

answers from Pittsfield on

My son had to have a tear duct unblocked when he was little like that an had to go under general anesthesia. It is a little nerve racking, but he was fine. Your little guy will be ok :o)

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J.G.

answers from Springfield on

My son had to have surgery at 10 months, and I was a nervous wreck! He had a pediatric anesthesiologist, but truthfully I wasn't worried about that at all. I just didn't want my baby to be scarred or in pain or suffer in any way. My husband help my hand and tried to reassure me. I prayed a lot. That helped, but I just needed to get it over with!

He's fine!!! And I'm sure your little one will be fine, too. Hang in there! It sucks, but you'll get through it.

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L.F.

answers from Chicago on

My son went under general anesthesia when he has branchial cleft cysts in his neck removed when he was only two years old. He had it done through Children's Memorial at Central DuPage Hospital. Throughout the whole ordeal, the hospital staff and surgeon were so good to us. They kept us updated and explained every step of the process to us.

The way it was explained to me, general anesthesia is safer than local anesthesia because it is a much more controlled condition. They first gave my son oral medication to make him loopy. It was quite comical to see him "drunk". Then they took him away for the rest of the anesthesia and surgery. We had him back in our arms in about an hour and a half. Everything was fine.

I was so anxious during the week leading up to the surgery. I put that nervous energy to good use by negotiating the price of a new car. You might want to think of some kind of project to keep your mind occupied for the next few weeks. It will help you cope with the anxiety somewhat.

Good luck to you!

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P.K.

answers from New York on

My suggestion would be to see if they have a pediatric anesthesiologist.
Kids do incredibly well after surgery. They certainly are not like adults.
They just get on with life after the anesthesia wears off. I know it is frightening but try to relax. 35 years ago they started IVs while they are
awake and you were not allowed in the OR. Now it is soooooo different.
Most everywhere you are allowed to walk him in the OR, they put him to
sleep and then do what they need to. So not as traumatic.. Good luck.
Keep us posted. Better to do it now then when he is older.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

HUGS My son had hand surgery a little older, but I was nervous too. That is part of our job classification -section 8 rule number 12 thousand five. I was worried about my 25 year old who had a colonoscopy about two years ago. His girlfriend now wife forgot to call me. I was livid. Wait till she has kids. Anyway, was trying to get you to chuckle. It is tough being a mom, but just keep writing and writing us if you have to while you wait it out. And turn it over to God.

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C.T.

answers from Denver on

Hi S. - it's TOUGH letting your kid go into surgery. My son was 7 but it was still hard. They are so resilient though and I imagine he will be bouncing back in no time. It's actually a good thing he is young. He wont remember it at all and his scar will completely heal as he grows.

I can only make one suggestion that we received from a friend. Even though you have a medical background, allow your husband to take him into the OR for anesthesia. It was tough enough on my husband but he said it would have been doubly tough on me.

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C.W.

answers from Lynchburg on

Dear S.-

VIRTUAL HUGS AND SUPPORT!!!

I know people 'say' kids are resilient...but I never knew just how resilient...My significant other had a thoracotomy (sp?) as part of serious surgery 3 years ago...he seemed to take months to get over it...a year after, my daughter had one as well...and not only was she out of the hospital in NO time...when we got home I had to practically tie her down til she was healed!

I will send good thoughts and prayers to you both on day of the surgery!!

Michele/cat

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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Ooooooh yeah.

And let me tell you, my med background makes things MUCH worse (because you know all the ins and outs to what 'might' go wrong). I'm an absolute nervous wreck while my son's in surgery (even though he's proved several times he does just fine with anesthesia, minus his prexisting breathing issues. Because of those breathing problems, he usually ends up needing to be intubated.)

I'm sloooooowly getting more 'used' to my son being under, but add in the med background + mommy part and it's just not easy.

Hugs!!!

On the upside... infants start having major surgery (and doing great with them) from day 1. I know one little girl who hit her 50th surgery mark on May 10th (and she's 2 and a half), and dozens (personally, not stats) of kids undergoing major surgery multiple times in a month who are 2 and under (living at Children's Seattle for weeks on end you meet a LOT of parents whose children are in and out of surgery). I'm just sharing because it soooo helped to be around parents of kids getting far more invasive surgeries that my son's.

It needs to be done, it gets done. Any emergencies get dealt with. ((Like my son who decided to stop breathing during abdominal surgery, okay, zwip! Intubated. Good to go. And now, they just know that he needs to be intubated after they admin the twilight and before they admin the anesthesia.

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P.M.

answers from Tampa on

Lotsa hugs... my daughter has been under twice and she is fine!

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M.V.

answers from New York on

My son also had a cyst on his eyebrow when he was about the same age as your son - we had it removed by a plastic surgeon under general anesthesia. I remember being nervous about having him "put under" too, but the pediatric anesthesiologist spoke to us prior to the surgery and helped put our minds at ease. Everything went smoothly, and there is no visible scar (it is hidden in the line of his eyebrow). There were no complications, and he was back to his normal self very quickly. I will pray all goes well for your family - just remember to WRITE DOWN all your questions ahead of time to make the most of your time with the surgeon and anesthesiologist - it is SO easy in the stress of the moment to forget to ask something you meant to!

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