Do I Owe Babysitter?

We had very similiar issues with my Brother then we found out the pucking was from stress over school. Once those issues were resolved the pucking stopped. My guess is That she was being treated poorly before the pucking. And That is what caused it. Is she better now That she is out of the daycare is she doing better? I hope so!

could there be something else? like maybe the day care provider isn't treating her right and your daughter makes herself throw up so she doesn't have to be there? "playing sick"?

if a doctor can't give answer's i'd look further into the situation...could be your daughter is stressed out by the daycare and knows if she throws up she'll go home????

Call the county daycare licensor and report what is going on...... (I'm not sure if you HAVE to pay her. The licensor should be able to answer that question.) BUT, take your daughter out immediately! This sounds like a horrible daycare!

I don't know, I mean, I can see why the babysitter is getting frustrated, but if this is a medical issue and the medicine isn't helping, then perhaps Wendy is right and your daughter is upset to the point of throwing up, so it's more emotionally caused, perhaps the stress of the sitter's punishment is making it worse? Either way, she is not treating your daughter nicely at all and your little girl needs to be in the care of someone who is capable of handling that.

When I think of throw up, there is the sick chunky or liquidy kind, and then there is the little bit when a kid is upset and gags their food out... it sound like she is doing to gagging. Technically, a daycare provider has the right to request children t be picked up for throwing up if they are sick, so it depends exactly what is going on.

Did you sign a contract with the babysitter? If not, then she doesn't have a claim to make you pay, and you shouldn't have to at all. If you have a contract, look for how it can be broken and what the penalties are, do you have to pay if she breaks the contract and to what extent does she have to do that? I'm guessing she can't force you to pay if she chooses to discontinue services.

As for the subsidy, I'm sure it will roll over to a new daycare provider, contact them and see how that works. When you pay the new provider, you will get the subsidy so long as I understand.

Sometimes things are ugly. If it's true that you won't get your subsidy unless you pay her the two weeks, well - you need the subsidy, so you need to follow the rule. I would get it in writing - from the highest authority possible and also find out if you can file a grievance/complaint and see if you can put it on hold while they research your complaint. At least this is what I'd do if I were in that situation.

Sorry to hear about your girl. I know my son lets out his school stresses at home & this is probably what your daughter is doing. There are some kids books about anxiety (e.g., "What to do when you worry too much") as well as books for the parent. (e.g., Freeing your Child from Anxiety"). When I want to find a book, I search on Amazon then look for whatever book I find at my library. 90% of the time they have it.

I am sooo confused. Maybe I am not fully understanding the post. Are you saying that your daughter has been throwing up on purpose, meaning doing something to force it, for more than 3 months? This does not sound good. A 4 yr old should not know how to throw up on command. Only if she was actually sick and the act of throwing up was natural. Please explain how it is that Kassie is throwing up....

Ya know......this sounds like the sitter Wendy is not a wonderful person to have around your daughter. Maybe your sweet daughter does not like the way she is being treated. Sounds more like she is having some kind of anxiety over this and she is gagging. I would take her out ....pay her and be done with her! I remember my son in preschool and the teacher would make him eat what was served. I used to call her and tell her he does not like that certain food, please give him what I send in. Give you daughter a hug and tell her everything will be ok from now on!

Although this sitter sounds like a nightmare id pay her and be done! Im sorry your baby is going thru this and hope she gets better....

Read your contract. It should address this situation.

If the agreement states you must give 2 weeks notice than pay up.

If this isn't covered in the contract, don't pay. Make a copy of the contract, make a copy of your doctor's note, and write a letter to "subsidy" explaining why the daycare is not entitled to payment.

If your child is throwing up you can't have her at child care, regardless of the reason. You still have to pay for child care to keep her spot. It must be very frustrating to have this issue on a daily basis now. You say she's been there for years and this is new?

It's obviously not working anymore so you have to change care givers. If you can't get money to pay for child care until she is paid then what choice do you have? Pay her and move on.

This lady sounds nuts! Get her out of there and asap and report her. You cannot punish a child for being ill! And no, don't pay her. Just get the heck out of Dodge!

I'm glad you are finally getting your daughter out of there!
I'm not understanding the problem with the subsidy, they won't pay her for the two weeks since your daughter's not attending? Correct?
Don't pay her, she has cost you plenty of money by calling you home from work. The way she has treated your daughter in inexcusable! I only wish you would have removed her from Wendy's care sooner.

ADDED: Oh, I see. You have to pay her to continue receiving your subsidy. Well, in that case pay her. You have to. But also file a complaint. If she was recommended by DHHS then they need to be made aware of the situation so they can investigate and maybe stop placing children in her care.

It sounds like maybe the sitter is seeing that rather than being actually sick, your daughter is forcing herself to throw up for attention. The fact that she only does this at the sitters would re-enforce that idea. I would not care for a child that kept purposefully vomiting in my class, so I am not surprised she has decided to start calling you if the child forces herself to gag. Since the issue seems to be behavioral on your daughters part, and it has not been corrected, than I am afraid you will have to meet the terms of the contract you signed when you put her in care.

Sounds like the problem is the daycare provider. Remove your child immediately. No child should be on the bad list because they have a medical problem. If she is throwing up as in something viral then she shouldn't be in school or daycare. If it is not something contagious (like when my son had a migrane and would get sick and then feel better) then you shouldn't have to pick a child up.

I don't understand how the subsidy works because around here, they only pay for care the hours that a child is in daycare due to work or school. If they don't attend, the provider doesn't get paid. Why will they not help w/ cost of new daycare if you have to remove your daughter for subpar care?

I would not pay her because she is not caring for your child properly.

The way that you've written this is very confusing. However, why don't you determine which option would be faster and less expensive, and do that. It sound like either way, you have Some financial responsibility. Sometimes it's "cheaper" to just pay up and get the offending person out of your life.

This woman sounds horrible. I'm sure she's making your daughter's situation worse, not better. I'm not sure about the money situation, but if she kicks your daughter out, I dont see why you should be forced to give her 2 weeks notice and pay. What does it say in your contract?

I would call your county subsidy office and ask to speak to your caseworkers superviser. I don't see why you should have to send your child to someone that is abusing her. They shouldn't want that. As a matter of fact, they should want formal complants themselves since they are paying them. Someone there should be able to help you as long as you remain calm and prefessional when you call.

If that doesn't work, work up the ladder making formal complaints all the way up till you get to your local state representative. The squeaky wheel gets the oil.

Good Luck!!

Unless there was something in writing that you agreed to, also in writing dictating that notice and pay if you pull her out, you owe her nothing except for the time that she actually cared for your daughter. I wrote to you before that I think it is very telling that your daughter is only throwing up there.

The fact that Wendy puts your daughter in the corner for this leads me to believe that Wendy is somehow the cause. Kassie seems so afraid of Wendy or so anxious about being in her care that she is literally getting sick over it. IMO, Wendy should not be caring for children at all! I hope when this is all said and done that you will review her on this site so that other moms can avoid the heartache you and Kassie have endured!

I would work your way up the chain of command with the subsidy - someone there can override the terms. Just keep asking for the next level of supervisor. It's a bureaucracy, it will take 7-10 calls. As someone once told me, you need to be a Guerrilla Mom when it comes to these types of things and the heck with what everyone else thinks!

Sounds as though you need to speak with your case worker or social worker. Also, seems there is a lot of stress for your daughter in this daycare setting. Call and talk to your doctor. Make multiple copies of the doctor's letter. Good luck.