Disciplining a Child with a Sensory Disorder

Hi N.,

Often times, when dealing with special needs children, the "normal" discipline is not affective because these children don't understand pain and/or the inconvenience of time out the way we do. What seems to work best (I work with special needs children in the public school system) is social stories and pictures.

Social stories are short stories that should be told over and over to the child explaining how to act in certain situations. For instance, your sister could tell her daughter a social story about table manners: "When we sit at the table to eat, we keep our plate on the table. We only pick up our cup when we are taking a drink and then we set it gently back onto the table. We NEVER pour our drink onto the floor because, if we do, we will then have to clean it up and that's not very fun."....she could also discuss other consequences for negative actions. Note: it is very important that the consequences discussed are carried out after the negative action....it doesn't hurt the little one to get a towel and clean the mess she's made on the floor and it makes a more lasting impression than just griping at her (or even spanking her) will.

Social stories work best when they are told outside of the time to behave. For example, at some point during the day (when it's not time to eat) your sister could sit her daughter at the table as if they are playing a game. Then she could tell her how she expects her to behave at the table, maybe even using play dishes and showing her. Then, when it is time to eat, your sister will need to simply remind her of appropriate behavior..."Susie, don't forget, when we are at the table we keep our plate on the table and we only pick up our cup when we want a drink and then we set it back down nicely. Can you show me how we act nicely at the table today?" Your sister could also get pictures of a child eating appropriately (for instance, sitting, using utensils, drinking, etc.) and lay them out around the place setting for her daughter to follow at dinner time.

Disciplining children with disabilities is a little more time consuming but well worth it in the end. Sometimes parents tend to excuse negative behavior because of the disability. It is VERY important not to let the negative behavior slide because then the child will think the behavior is acceptable. She is relying on her parents to show her how to behave in this world and they will be doing her a favor if they are "a little h*** o* her" now. She needs to know the appropriate behaviors and she needs to know they are expected of her, no exceptions.

A good website to go to to understand social stories is http://www.polyxo.com/socialstories/introduction.html

Of course, if I can help in any way, please feel free to email me.

Take care,
J.

www.nogreaterjoy.org

To Train Up a Child

Has worked wonderfully with one 'normal' kid and one sensory integration disorder kid (although he can be a little bit more hard headed than the first).

My son was about on the same level if not a little worse at 3 and what we did consistantly was time out. It was difficult at first, but eventually he got it and all we had to do was say time out and he would straighten up. I always had one chair that was just for time out. Now he is 4.9 and we have very few discipline problems. Also once her speech gets better things will get easier all the way around.

just wanted to sing the praises of PPCD. my oldest boy was in it for 2 years and i saw great progress.

Hey -
I'm not sure what PPCD is, so I am not sure what kind of help they are giving. But, my son was diagnosed with SID when he was about 27 months old and he had speech, OT and PT. For us, I basically just did timeouts for him. For things like throwing a plate on the floor and pouring drinks, I would say "No." very clearly. If he did it a 2nd time, I would take him out of his high chair and he would be done. To me, if they are resorting to throwing and spilling, then they are not hungry and do not need to be subjected to the highchair. Just take them out and re-direct with another activity. Also, if I KNEW they were hungry and just acting out, you could try taking everything away from the high chair and turning it around and facing the wall and doing a "mini-timeout". But, if she is truly on the 17-24 month level - this type of timeout might be too harsh.

However, I agree with one of the other moms that consistency is the key. Even with SID, I did not accept bad behavior from my son. The book that someone else pointed out (The out of sync child) is a HUGE asset in terms of understanding what your child is going through. For my son, the key things were to keep him on a schedule - which included proper amount of sleep in nap times and consistent snacks. I also found that prepping him about what we were doing helped him get through each day (i.e. "in a few minutes, you will be taking a bath", "in a few minutes, we will read a story", "In a few minutes we are going to leave in the car").

My son has in therapy for 1 year and then I enrolled him in dance and gymnastics for 1 year to continue to "push" his sensory buttons. He is now 5 and is doing REALLY well. He is still in gymnastics to push those buttons, but honestly, I barely recognize any of the sensory issues. I would say the main lingering issue is his fear of riding his bike.

Good luck!
L.

I have a 6 year old with SID and we disipline him the same as my other kids. even at a 2 year old level you should take away the food and plate if he throws it and meal time is over... he may freak out the first time but be consistant and he will get the message.

Time outs and how ever you would disipline her normally on the age level appropriate is fine.

Good luck
A. J

Hello, my daughter is 11 and has had SID since she was a baby. One of the main things I would encourage your sister to do is be consistent. Repetive behaviors are good teachers. Also, she's going to have to figure out what will work the best for her. There is abook out there called "The Out of Sync Child" its all about how to work with kids that have SID. Its a great book. Also, you can find all kinds of tools to work with on the Internet. Also, she might look into Occupational Therapy. They work with kids that have SID. Blessings