Bed Wetting/ Thumb Sucking

Hi, J.:

I'll address the thumb sucker since I have one of those. My advice would be to leave him alone about it. He'll stop when he's ready--or when he hits Kindergarten and his friends begin to mention it.
According to what I've read, many children will begin to taper off their thumb-sucking around age 5. I know that was true for my son. He's now 6 and only sucks his thumb when going to sleep.
The more you focus on it, the more stressful an issue it becomes for your child (and the more it'll become a tug-of-war between you)--and the more he'll need that thumb.
Let him be :-)

On the bed wetting, a couple of things come to mind. My son was 5 1/2 before he started staying dry overnight. He's a deep sleeper (and, believe me, I'd rather have a deep sleeper!), and when he would go through a growth spurt or an allergy attack, he would be more likely to wet (or wet through the overnight diapers, even). We did the same thing - limiting liquids in the afternoon/evening, new toys, etc., but it wasn't until HE was ready was he able to do it. (I've also heard that if there is a family history of bed wetting, especially with boys, it's much more likely that they will wet the bed at night. Family history includes parental siblings and first cousins...)

HTH
L.

My sympathy is with you. My daughter had the wetting bed problem for 17 years, yes I said 17, she was 17 before she finally stopped. I took her to every doctor in town, and they told me she would grow out of it. We did all kinds of test to see if she did have anything wrong with her, and everything came back normal. One doctor did put her on these pills, saying she had something in her brain unbalanced and that is why she wets the bed. Well she was so depressed and had no energy (keeping in mind she was 5 at the time) and she was just miserable, I took her off them right away. I just awaited for her to grow out of it.

She was fully trained at the age of 2 and did not wet the bed. It started when she was around 3-4 and she would wet the bed 4-6 times a night. Every morning I would wake up to 6 sets of sheets to do, very frustrated I know but there is nothing you can do sorry to say. I got so fedup with it I went and got her goodnights and she wore them until she was 13 years old. I just could not take it anymore.

One thing you could try which worked for a few nights was no milk after lunch. I found if she had milk at supper time or during the late afternoon she would wet the bed more times that night. It did not stop it completely, but it did help a little bit. Trust me I tried everything. No drinks after supper, threating her, getting mad at her, taking toys away, tell her she could never stay at anyones house, and nothing worked. When she did go to a friends (which never happened too often) she would take a goodnight, and a plastic bag.

The sucking of the thumb I never had any of my children do it, I know from my sister's kids they grew out of it.

1st: the 5 year old's bladder may not have kept up with his growth and causing the bed wetting. This is a very common problem that they do eventually grow out of. Have your friend talk to her pediatrician but she will probably get told the same things. She could try the special pads that are absorbant and could be right under the child. They may save washing all the sheets. The are washable and reusable and the inital cost may be a little more but cheaper in the long run.
2nd:thumb sucking usually will stop on its own (acording to my friend with thumb suckers). However one friend said she used strethy gloves and the child didn't like the texture and they are totally washable. Just an idea from my friend. I haven't had a thumb sucker yet! A.

For the first issue - bedwetting is common, he may not be able to control it, often their bladder is just too small or they are in too deep a sleep, give it time.
Second, I was a thumb sucker, so was one dtr and my son. I did not stop until the age of 13 - it was only at night when I was home, not at friends houses. We pressed my dtr at the age of 5 at the dentist suggestion, it was traumatic for all and I wished we didn't press the issue now. However, it was a thumb splint that finally stopped her. My son is 4 and still sucks, he has stopped at times, even for almost 6 months but started again when he began a new school. He sometimes gets a rash because of the moisture. At those times I gently remind him he needs to stop for a few days so his rash can heal. When the rash gets real bad then we use some medical tape on his thumb, but just until the rash goes away.
I'm not sure what you mean by a gap, is it an over bite or a space between front teeth, Because a space between front teeth can be from the mouth growing, it makes space for adult teeth which are larger - no space means tooth pulling a possible braces (got one of those too).
N.

The response I have is to the thumb sucking. When I was in the first grade I had quite a large gap in my teetha nd I also sucked my thumb. My gap grew together just fine long before I stopped sucking my thumb, and now people ask me if I have ever had braces, which I have not. Also my parents tried everything to get me to stop and nothing worked either. Until one day i stopped on my own.

Your sons gap may never grow together regardless of whether or not he sucks his thumb, and he may need the thumb sucking as security at the moment. So my advice is to stop worring. Let him suck his thumb until he has come to the conclusion on his own that he doesn't need it. The more you push the more it may drive him to keep it up. As far as the teeth go, if he's going ot need braces he's going ot need them. His gap could close on it's own regardless, so let whats going to happen happen, and stop stressing yourself and your child out.

Hi J.,
Kids outgrow thumb sucking on their own, and especially if your son isn't losing his baby teeth yet, I would not worry about it or go to extreme measures, it's not like he's 13 and doing it. My kids both needed braces and neither sucked their thumb, the alignment of his teeth may not be related to his thumb sucking.
As for the bedwetter, bribing does not work. The little boy is not doing it on purpose. The reason he may be wetting when he was dry before is that it is winter, it's COLD and sometimes that leads to more wetting. What my sister found with one of her boys the winter after he was trained is that if he wore a diaper, he did not wet at night but if he went to bed without the diaper, he'd wet the bed - chalked it up to the extra layer of warmth making him not have to pee

I've answered both of these issues in the past on mommasource, so I am repeating myself, but that's okay, right? One of my sisters wet the bed until she was 12 and one of my brothers wet the bed until he was 8. Luckily, it was handled as no problem. I thought for sure my sons would wet the bed at night and totally expected it, but was surprised when my two year old stayed dry at night when he became potty trained. When he did happen to have an accident one day during his nap, he was mortified! I told him it was absolutely fine, but he was beside himself over it. He was adorable. My son Cooper also sucked his thumb until he was five. He was a big-time thumb sucker, either one would do and both would get red and raw. Right before starting kindergarten, I told him it was okay to suck his thumb at home, but that they didn't want him to do that at school. To my surprise (and my husband's too) Cooper stopped sucking his thumb that very day! Cold turkey! All on his own. We could not believe it. He was an unusual case though, I think. :) I'd let him use the thumb if he wants to/needs to.
D. xo

for your friend...check to see if his bladder/kidneys are working properly thru a urologist. also, has there been any change in his life...sometimes change is the issue.
re: thumb sucking...when my daughter was 5 yr she stopped right b4 her baby sister was born. my 2nd child is 9 and we are still trying to have her stop. good luck.

Hi J.,

Im answering your question about the bed wetting 5 year old.
My daughter will be 5 this week and is still in pull-ups at night because of wetting the bed.
I too tried everything and even talked to her pediatrician about it and he really eased my mind a bit about this subject.
My daughter is a very heavy sleeper. Once she is out for the night, you could blast the radio and she will not wake up. Because of this she doesn't get up in time to realize she needs to go to the bathroom.
Its a complicated situation LOL. I've been blessed with a great sleeper since she was 5 weeks old. So I'll just have to deal with wetting the bed for a few more years.

The doctor said there bladder is still growing. Bed wetting is something they will just grow out of. Give them another couple of years, they will slowly be able to control it more and realize the urge to go to the bathroom even at night.

I stopped taking things away from her for wetting the bed and stopped trying to reward her, I felt bad when I realized it was something she couldn't control.

So for now we just wear pull-ups to bed.

I hope this helped some or gave a little encouragement.

Good luck and let me know what you guys try and what works for you.

Jenna

Hi J., Your friends 5 year old may just be a sound sleeper. I have heard that some who use pullups at night have stopped so the child feels wet and may stop. Also you can have your friend wake the child about 11pm or when he is retiring to take the boy to the bathroom and "pee" he may not wake up and in this way will empty his bladder. Now, the thumbsucker may be more difficult. My daughter is a thumbsucker and her 2 children are too. Does he go to pre-school? If so you can start by asking him not to in school.
People fing security in this (among other things) My young grandchildren are 9 and 6 and when they sit to watch TV (only after homework) I see they start to suck their thumbs. The parents are going through a divorce and there are other issues. Yes, I do worry about their teeth as their mom had to wear a retainer but I feel I cannot take this comfort away. My best, Grandma Mary