Another Pooping on the Potty Problem

Take away diapers completely. Underwear only or naked. That's it. I'm usually of the frame of mind that you let the child lead toilet training but when you've reached nearly 4 years old with a typical and healthy child then it's time to take the choice away. Preschools that act as kindergarten prep won't take 4 year olds in diapers.

I wouldn't punish him when he has accidents. Stick to praise when does well. Have him help clean up his messes. Don't over-do the praise, though. Just stick with "good job" and move along. When he goes a couple of days with only one accident, get him a small treat. When he goes a week, get him another reward.

Since he is already pooping in a diaper in the bathroom, the next step might be to get him to sit on the potty with the diaper still on to poop. There is a method where you basically take these baby steps toward getting him to eventually poop on the potty. Once he is sitting on the potty with the diaper on to poop, the next step is to actually cut a hole in a diaper for the poop to fall through into the potty, and once he is doing that, taking the diapers away all together. He might just feel more secure having the diaper on to poop and this might be the way to eventually get him over that. Offer rewards and incentives for when he cooperates with the next step - M&Ms and getting to put a stamp on the calender is what has been working with our daughter.

I feel your pain. I delt with this with my daughter until recently. I would have to catch her needing to go, put her on the potty to go, otherwise she'd go in her underwear. I spoke with her ped several times about it and finally he decided that she was constipated and the urge to go was too sudden and there was too much to come out that she was just freezing in place and couldn't move, didn't know what to do.

You know what, he was right! Once we solved the constipation, she know tells us she has to go, runs to the potty and goes. No problem at all.

Like you, I tried everything -- nothing worked. Punishment definitely won't work. My gut instinct says to try and see if you can find a way to get his colitis under control and then that might help. Call your ped, and talk to her/him and see if they can offer you any suggestions.

Other than that, I would say have a lot of patience. He'll get this eventually!

I read somewhere on Mamapedia that someone cut a hole in the diaper and then put it on their child. My DD pooped on the potty twice and then insisted on a pull-up. We finally put a holey pull up on her so the poop went into the potty and we said, look it went into the potty--the pull-up broke. Since then she has relaxed. She has asked for pull ups since then but we gently and firmly refused to give it to her and she has sat down and done it on the potty.

Until we put her in undies we didn't know if she was "ready." We put undies on her about 10 days ago and she has had only 2 (pee) accidents. So for her, ready needed a little push.