2,5 Yo Hitting Everyone

Hi Y.,

I don't think it is a coincidence that there is a new baby and your toddler is hitting. It must be hard to share mommy with a baby, and even though the behavior started before the baby was born, there are definite changes for her even before the baby is born. I would try to spend some special time with her (not easy with a new baby in the house) but maybe your husband can take care of the baby for an hour or so to allow you to give your daughter your undivided attention. This might help, or I could be completely off base, but it is a possiblity. Let us know what happens.

D.

I think the previous poster hit it dead on. I told my children to "use your words". Before they had words I said it for them...."I see you want the ball." "may I have the ball please." or "you would like a turn on the slide?" "Say my turn, please." Validating her feelings and showing her how to properly deal with those emotions with words will prevent a lot of her emotionally driven behavior. Words are extremely powerful. I taught both my babies sign language before they had words so they could communicate with me. I only had a very few signs, ones that covered their immediate needs, help, milk, up, thank you, hungry, all done, etc. It prevented a lot of frustration.

When she hits you remove her from the situation quickly. She'll put it together that hitting ends her fun time. Age 2 is frustrating because they can do a lot of stuff, know what they want, but don't have the ability to put their feels or needs into words a lot of the time.

It'll pass .... and then she'll start doing something else just as bad. lol

This sort of behavior is due to her lack of speech & language skills. All 2 year olds get frustrated with their inability to commicate effectively so they in turn use their hands.

This doesn't mean your daughter is going to grow up to be a bully. She is looking for an easy way to get her point across.

Punishing her does not help. You need to give her the skills she needs. When she hits you say "no hitting." If he hit because she wanted a ball someone else was playing with show her how to sk for it "ball please." Enlist the other children too so they can learn as well.

She is 2 so explaining things does not help. Just use simple language over and over again. Find one phrase to say that she will recognize.

Her language skills will continue to grow and the more she learns to effectively communicate, the less she'll use her hands - but only if you guide her along.

A.