2 1/2 Year Old Boy - Won't Poop in Potty!

He is probably confused if he is still wearing diapers or pull ups. Get him some white plain underwear and let him poop in them a couple of times. It feels different to them. Besides I started potty training my son at the age of two. The pooping in the potty took awhile and was a little frustrating, but underwear worked.

Don't push the issue because that could cause him to become more resistant in pooping on the potty. When he is ready he will poop on the potty. With my kids it was when they didn't like the feeling of the poop in their pull ups. Doctors will tell you that he will do it in time. Just keep going on the track you are with him doing it just a little at a time and eventually he will go on the potty and let it all go.
D.

I am 31 and have been married for almost 12 yrs. My husband and I have 3 boys ages 10,7 and 4.

I had a very similar situation with my youngest boy. He was completely toilet trained during the day before he was three but he wouldn't poop until he had his pull-up on at night. I would have to change him before I went to bed and then first thing in the morning. He is now three and has improved a lot. He only poops once during the night and will now do one on the potty during the day. But I didn't do anything except encourage him to start becoming more comfortable. I think with boys it may be down to maturity. My daughter was easy and did everything together but this little boy just seems to need a little more time. Perhaps your son also needs a little more time. 2 1/2 years is very young for a boy to be toilet trained. From a lot of mothers I know, three is a better age to aim for. And he already seems to be doing well. So hang in there. It will happen!

E., I'd back off a bit....

My suggestion...let it go. He's on the young side for being potty-trained. 3.5 is more normal for boys. My daughter is still pooping in a diaper and she'll be 4 in august. If you force it, he may use it as a control issue (like my daughter does). Toileting, eating and sleeping are the three areas where kids can always be in control and it is best to let them take charge of their own bodies.

Have patience, he'll go when he wants to. Not that it is easy for us to wait!!!!

BTW, we tried all the things that you have, except DD threw a fit when we put her on even if she had to go. We started around 18 mos. when she got a potty for xmas, then dropped it until about 2.5 then dropped it until 3ish, then finally she started peeing at 3.5 which was a bit of a battle, so I'm letting poop come when she wants to.

Well E. I had the same problem with my 2 1/2 daughter now three. The only solution I found was that you have to put underwear on them. Once you do not put any pull-ups on them at all they realize they are messy when they pooh. Especially if it is really nice underwear they like they do not want to get them dirty.
Now my daughter is three and if I try to put a pull-up on her because she has diarrhia or something she tells me no mommy I'm a big girl.
SInce I have a four year old son, three year old daughter, and 20 month old duaghter I needed them to get potty trained as quickly as possible. I was paying for two cases of pampers and one in pull-ups per month. So it was getting just a little pricey for me.
Well good luck and let me know how it goes. Please feel free to contact me if you have any more questions. Jasmine in Bemuda.

my first born boy was exactly three years and a day when he finally took to potty training. from what i have learned is that they sometimes want to remain the baby and it takes them time to get used to the idea of growing up and no longer being the baby. try for a couple days once a month until he finally takes to it. it can be long, drawn out, and financially annoying, but it is not uncommon. just gotta have patience because getting upset will just make things worse. good luck. continue the praising when he goes in the bathroom just to sit with someone and just play it as a game sometimes. no body stays in diapers forever, lol. good luck.

I agree with the others recommendations to start wearing underwear full-time. It's helpful to prepare your child for this transition by letting them know in advance that in X amount of days we're going to say goodbye to our diapers and start wearing underwear all the time just like ----- [daddy, your best friend, grandpa, etc... -- whoever is most motivating]. You can then use a calendar to cross of the days as you do the countdown. You can also do the countdown by just saying that this is our very last pack of diapers that we are buying and preparing them for the transition by counting down how many are left. Some people even have parties to make the transition so that it is very festive and a celebration -- have family members over, a cake, and presents (new underwear) and the family saying goodbye to the diapers. Motivating for a lot of kids if there is enough positive emphasis on it and a role model paired with it. Great when the motivating person can check in every day for a while to see how the new underwear are working out.

I am a sahm of 8 - 5 boys, 3 girls. One of my sons is almost 3. None of my boys were toilet trained before 3, while all of my girls were ready or done by 2. I know I'm not the only mom with this experience even though I know my approach to potty training is very relaxed. If you're this interested in toilet training, I'm sure you've read about the signs of readiness. And if you're concerned about his age, don't be. [I had a grandother tell me once that all her children were potty trained at 14 months - that is insane! And EXTREMELY improbable for 3 boys and a girl. In reality, mom was trained when to sit them on the pot! why put your family thru that?] When my oldest son was supposed to start preschool in 2 weeks, I brought it to his attn that he couldn't go in a diaper. He said, "Guess I better work on that potty thing, huh mom?" and that was all it took - he was 3 1/2. My advice is relax; 2 yr olds make a potential battle field out of everything. This doesn't have to be one of them.

Take away the diapers at home, go pantless. Crazy but it works after no more than a few days. You can't go in the diaper if there is no diaper to go in. Give him warning and say you are no longer a baby so you don't NEED the diapers that babies have. I did this with both of my kids and it works. Obviously start the process when you know you will be home for a couple of days.

He seems to want to be a baby and not a big boy. Not sure why he thinks only big boys poop in the toilet, but he has it implanted firmly in his mind. I have a book about what to expect with the toilet, or something to that effect, it is written for little children to understand and we read it to him a lot. I saw it the other day when I was cleaning out his bookcase because it is time to put the baby type books away (he is 10). If you respond to me and let me know your address I will try to mail it to you sometime this week as I am going to finish sorting out the books from what needs packed away and what needs yard saled or donated.

I read somewhere a long time ago he has something to do with the feeling of something falling away from the body and noise of it hitting the water. Like a part of you has fallen away. It is terrifying. I can't remember any of my children suffering from this terror, but it can be very real.

As cruel as it seems it may be time to take away his "big boy" toys. One at a time as he poops in his pants. Only "big boys" get suckers, no more suckers. Only "big boys" have Tonka Trucks or whatever.

Or I guess you could take away all of the "big boy" toys and only leave him with baby toys to play with and he can earn them back when he poops in the toilet one at a time.

Do you use your regular toilet or does he have a potty chair close to the floor where the distance isn't so great and he can get to it easily himself?
P. R

Oh my word! - This could have been my post on many boards about 8 months ago. Only my son was almost 7 and we had never managed to even get a little bit of poop in the toilet. Now granted my son has developmental delays so real-age-wise he wasn't really 6, but he did all the go hide, can't do it in the potty bit. I was resigned to changing diapers forever and then in January, shortly after his birthday, I started something new. I made "sitting" part of his routine. I'd have him stand to pee, then set the timer and he'd sit for 5 minutes. He got a treat if he sat without fussing and we didn't make an issue at all about poop. When he had messes, I'd clean him up with no scolding, but would say, it's OK, when you're a big boy, you an do it in the toilet. After about 3 weeks of that, he actually produced in the toilet and we made a big deal of it, clapping and cheering. Within a month after that he was regularly producing several times a day - pretty much on demand. And now we rarely have an accident - he even tells us when he has to go!
Long story, but my point is, he had to be developmentally ready and so does your son. Take the pressure off by practicing "sitting" instead of focusing on "pooping", no fuss when he does go in his diaper or underwear, and see where it goes. I had to get to the point where I understood that in the larger scheme of things, spending 15 minutes a day leaning up messes was nothing compared to what some people go through with special needs kids. And for you, enjoy all the cute, sweet things your son does, make hanging the messy diapers a non-event and know that, this too, will pass!

You started way too early. You should just be starting now. He'll get it soon enough. Most people hurry into potty-training & end up frustrated. If you wait until they're ready, it'll be done in a few days. I babysit a lot & usually start about 2 1/2 yr. If it's not going real well within a week, I quit for a couple more months. At that time, 2-3 days & they're fully trained. Be patient. It's something that can't be forced.

Both of my boys were terrified to poopie on the potty...so I understand your concern and frustration.

It was suggested to me that they might be afraid of the water splashing back up on their bottom and to lay strips of tp in the toilet.

Can't hurt right? Good luck!

My 3 year old daughter was the same way. She would pee in the potty, but refused to poop. I would also try to catch her pooping and run her into the bathroom, but then she would just hold it in. I also made promises of new toys, shopping trips to Toys R US, you name it, but nothing worked. We put her in underpants thinking that she would hate the feel of the poop in her underpants--she didn't! Finally, one day, on her own, she went to the bathroom and went poop all by herself. I was in the shower and I could hear her yelling "I went poop!" and I thought to myself, "oh great, another mess to clean up" and much to my amazement, she had gone in the potty! My advice would be to not stress about it and let him do it on his own terms. Also, read those potty training books to him all of the time. My daughter still loves to read those even though she's potty trained now.

I just went through this within the past few months. My son was "pee" trained in 5 days, but it took him 3 months before the pooping on the potty happened. You have to be patient and just let it happen. Bribery, punishment, and stressing out won't help! What made it click for my son was going to a playdate. The other little boy had to poop, an my son sat in the bathroom with him. Literally, the next day he started pooping on the potty and hasn't gone in his pants since. If there is a way you can get your son around other little ones that are doing it, he can see for himself. Good luck!

No child will want to potty in the pot the same way. I have two grown son & never had a problem w/them. But my oldest son has three boys & my daughter-in-law had trouble w/one. I think he was 3. Also my niece has 2 little girls & she didn't get one of them potty trained until she was almost 4.
Don't worry, when he gets ready, or maybe he's not quite developed yet. He'll start going in the potty when he's ready. When the 2 1/2 year old you baby-sit has to go try taking your little one w/you & say something like "It's time for all of 2 year old's to go & potty."
Good Luck

WOW Never went through this before and I had five children who went through the potty training stage. Okay the only thing that I can suggest is your son might be going through changes or rather your home could be going through changes that holds him back. When I say holds him back I mean well your son said it himself He wants to remain your little bitty baby. Has he always used a big person potty. You know did you start him off on a potty chair of his own and then said Okay now it is time to try the big person potty. I know one of my boys were terrified of the big toilet that flushed. I had to go out and get a potty chair. Perhaps you already have one or maybe like a friend of mine you decided to get one of those things that fit over the toilet seat so they don't have a fear of falling in.
Those don't work with some kids. They still think it is a long ways down and refuse to watch the stuff flush, fearing they too will go down the drain.
If you have not tried a potty chair that is his and only his and at his level. Do so. It might make all the difference in the world. Tell him this is his chair and only his chair. It is a Baby Potty chair. Only Babies use them.
Other things you could do is start treating him like the baby he wants to be or thinks he wants to be. Like when he wants to do big boy things, say no you can't do that dear your not ready, you can't use the potty yet.
Other than these things, and unless you want a full blown battle and terrible experience while potty training him, you'll just have to wait and be patient. You could try forcing him and yelling, but that would probably get you no where. I salute you and hope and pray you get through this soon. But remember he will potty train eventually and one day you will look back on these days and laugh and wonder where the time went. Good Luck ANG

My sons did the same thing. It took me "catching" him going poop and ripping off the diaper and putting him on the potty to do it. He also refused to poop on the BIG potty and when we got the Little potty out of storage he was fine. He finally told me he could pee in the big potty but he was afraid he would fall in the BIG potty. So I let him poop in the little potty and pee in the big potty until he was ready.

I have to say I totally disagree with taking things away because a child is not ready to do something. ( another mom mentioned this) Going potty is a natural thing and he will eventually Get it. You do not want any negative associations with doing something so natural and necessary. I would hate for him to start holding it and create more problems due to control issues with a parent.

Take you time .....know that this too shall pass, offer alternatives, point out nicely about other friends etc. Oh and I usedto do the Poopy dance- at my daughters day care for kids who pooped on the potty. It was weird, a bit crazy , silly what ever, singing a song. Each kid wanted the poopy dance so they all started pooping on the potty. I t motivated my daughter and cause quite the hullabaloo in the center when I would pick up. The things we do!

I have had 4 kids and I know they know when they are ready. I have had 3 boys and it does take them longer. DO not push him. When he is ready he will tell you. He already is doing a good job of talking to you this far. My last child was 4 and it was easy. I just waited for him. I know too many kids with potty issues that were forced to use the toilet when they were not ready. Good luck to you.

It's too early to panic at all. Some boys just want to be stubborn; and the more fuss you make; the more he'll defy what you want him to do. ONE suggestion that worked for me.......... when my son would sit on the potty, I would say I wanted to check/ and drop a couple 'cocoa puffs' in the water; then I would just go crazy happy!!!!!!!! I would praise him and tell him what a big boy he was. After awhile, he started going. He thought he was going with the cereal/ and got more relaxed about it. Good Luck!